Note: I am so unbelievably stupid. I just realised I wrote about the seals blocking his chakra, only to write him activating his Sharingan. Sorry, guys. Just ignore that. Thanks.
Sasuke rested his head on the desk, feeling groggy. Maybe it was time to leave. He was absolutely exhausted, after many arduous hours of studying seals in an effort to figure out how the fuck to get rid of the seals on his body.
Plus, the library was about to close - not that it mattered to him. He had to be invisible. He had been forced to sneak around the village, since he couldn't afford to attract any attention whatsoever. This pesky seal prevented him from using a simple Henge to appear nondescript. Instead, he was stuck with the prominent looks of the Uchiha.
He felt himself begin to doze off, but he stubbornly stayed awake. All he had to do was finish this last page, and then he could go back to the shitty prison cell.
"What are you looking at?" A voice piped up from behind him, startling Sasuke. He turned around to see who had interrupted him - and more importantly, snuck up on him.
It was a woman with flowing, fiery red hair. She was presumably in her early twenties, and had a disconcerting smile. He scanned her visage, determining that she must be a formidable kunoichi to have snuck up on him.
What the fuck kinda person approaches a stranger in the library like that? Sasuke stared at her blankly. Once she realised he wouldn't reply, she shrugged.
"You must be the one they caught," she leaned in close, whispering, "The one with the mysterious Sharingan?"
"Great. Does the whole fucking village know?" Sasuke replied scathingly and harshly. She wasn't the least bit disturbed.
"Well, no. But I know." She stuck out her hand. "I'm Uzumaki Kushina."
He reluctantly shook her hand. Like Naruto's mum? "Like the goddess?"
She smirked and nodded, "Like the one who did those pretty seals on your stomach."
You evil, rabid woman, Sasuke thought. Nevertheless, he clenched his jaw and tried to smile back - though all he could manage was a demented smirk.
He tried to say something else, but he couldn't. Suddenly, his tongue felt like it was set alight, and his body started burning with the same, familiar pain. He clutched his stomach in pure agony, refusing to scream. He noted mentally, in the midst of excruciating pain, that his seals seemed to have stopped working. Not that he could've done anything, since he was trying desperately not to faint.
Of course, as his vision became hazy, and his consciousness began to drift away, he was beginning to faint anyway. He vaguely managed to make out Kushina's almost concerned expression before everything went black.
When he woke up, he was lying on a rickety hospital bed. His wrist was attached to various kinds of monitors, and there were several IV drips. What the fuck are these evil cocksuckers putting into my body?
It looked like water, and he wasn't stupid enough to rip it out, so he continued to lie there, staring at the ceiling. Suddenly, the door opened, and Hiruzen walked in, along with a doctor.
"The patient shows signs of extreme dehydration, or chakra depletion. Both are interlinked. We haven't yet determined the cause of the intense pain in the patient's rectus abdominis muscle," the doctor said to Hiruzen, who nodded along. Sasuke listened in attentively.
"How are you this dehydrated? Do you not drink water? Even when you brush your teeth, surely you intake some water." Hiruzen turned to Sasuke, seeming puzzled.
"Well, obviously, I rinse my mouth with scotch," Sasuke deadpanned. Hiruzen glared at him, evidently not appreciating his sarcasm.
He didn't get it. Judging by what the doctor said, his weird black outs didn't make any sense. The tests they ran indicated that he was dehydrated half to death, but he drank plenty of water. It must've been linked to chakra depletion. There must've been an explanation that involved his mysterious time travelling/dimension hopping, chakra depletion and his sudden black outs. Something was triggering his depleted chakra, which thereby triggered the black outs. He just needed to figure out what.
Alarmed, he glanced at the various monitors.
"High systolic blood pressure - very high diastolic. Low heart rate - that's good. High count of blood components, albeit a delay in cellular senescence? Telomeres aren't shortening," Sasuke, rendered into a panicked state, began muttering rapidly under his breath, until he came upon a rather startling realisation.
"What are you, some kind of doctor or something?" Hiruzen, looking confused, regarded Sasuke, who in turn looked at Hiruzen, giving him a 'holier than thou' look.
"It's basic biology. Of course I'd look into basic goddamn science. I'm not an idiot."
Sasuke began hastily ripping off the various tubes they stuck into him, now filled with a sense of urgency. He got out of bed and began walking away.
"You seem to walk away from authoritative figures a lot," Hiruzen commented, crossing his arms furiously.
"You can take your authority and shove it up your arse," Sasuke replied, opening the door, "Also, I'm not going to stay in that shithole apartment-slash-prison anymore. Move me somewhere bigger and less smelly." With that, he promptly exited.
Despite what he said, Sasuke found himself back in the shitty apartment, vigorously making medical notes in an attempt to ascertain his condition. If he didn't figure out what was wrong with him, then it was only a matter of time before he blacked out at a very, very bad time, i.e during a battle.
He wracked his brain, trying to figure out what was special about the circumstances during the two times he blacked out. He couldn't think of anything. There must have been a piece of information that he was missing.
Sighing, Sasuke got up. To his chagrin, he realised that he needed to approach Hiruzen, once again.
After sprinting towards the Hokage's office, the door burst open as he barged in. Hiruzen was idly filling out paperwork. He blankly stared at Sasuke, no longer surprised at his sudden barging in.
"I need to talk to you," Sasuke said commandingly, plopping himself down in the empty seat opposite to Hiruzen.
"Of course you do," Hiruzen muttered, more to himself than Sasuke. He seemed annoyed. Not that Sasuke cared.
"When you caught me, I was unconscious, right? What else? Tell me everything," Sasuke demanded.
Hiruzen seemed taken aback, but nevertheless complied. "You were unconscious, yes. We caught you about a minute after you blacked out. Before that, we were spying on you." Sasuke nodded along, hanging on to every word.
"Who was spying on me?" And why the fuck didn't I notice?
"Just one of our kunoichi. Her name is Uzumaki Kushina-"
"I need you to deactivate the seals. Just for a short while." Sasuke interrupted Hiruzen, giving him a pleading look. For some reason, Hiruzen seemed to be swayed.
"You better not try anything," Hiruzen chided. He snapped his fingers, and the seal was off. "It's only for around 12 hours, and then they're back. Now, if you're satisfied...get out, you little shit."
Sasuke sighed in relief, feeling chakra flowing through his veins again - it was like liquid energy, reinvigorating him.
He shot up immediately, yelling a quick thanks before he tried to exit the building.
"Hey, there's one more thing!" Hiruzen called out to him, suddenly remembering something, stopping him in his tracks. He tossed Sasuke a brown envelope, along with a manila folder. "It's your pay. And the folder contains the details of your next mission."
Sasuke nodded, then left. He was back at his shitty apartment, and ready to compile notes, now that he had the missing piece of the puzzle.
Sitting at his desk, he now figured out that there was a possibility that the catalyst for his black outs was Kushina. She was the only common point in both of those scenarios, so it was highly likely that she was causing his black outs.
To his vexation, he had two daunting mysteries to solve, at present anyway, but at least he was getting somewhere with one of them. Kushina didn't seem to be aware of it, so he had to figure out what was special about her.
Maybe, just maybe, if he was able to approach her, this time with his Sharingan activated, he could figure it out.
He sighed with a modicum of relief. At least he had found the cause. Sasuke reclined on the bed, deciding to take a quick nap until tomorrow morning.
Omake
"What is this place?" Sasuke muttered to himself, scanning the surroundings. Everything was so cutesy and childish. Baby pink clouds floated in the sky. And there were horses. Horses everywhere.
"Why hello there! You must be Sasuke. Lovely to meet you!" One of the horses - why was it talking? - approached him. The horse was purple, with a long purple horn and massive purple wings.
"You're a horse," Stunned, this was all he managed to stutter out. The horse neighed, seeming to laugh at him.
"No, silly! I'm a pony. I'm an alicorn!" The horse replied to him, stunning him even further.
"My name is Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship!" It held out its front leg. Reluctantly, Sasuke shook the horse's leg.
"Why am I here?" Sasuke asked, trying his best to be polite.
"We brought you here, because we want to help you," The horse began calmly, "You have a murky, blackened soul, Sasuke. That is why we want to purify it."
"The fuck are you on about?" Sasuke immediately took five large steps away from the horse. It walked towards him anyway.
"No, no, Sasuke. We don't tolerate profanity here," it shook its head softly, tsking.
Sasuke gritted his teeth, beginning to get angry. "Yeah, well, fuck your tolerance, you purple cocksucker." With that, he began sprinting away desperately. He had to run away from all of this shit.
The horse gallopped after him. Its legs lifted off the ground as its wings flapped. Sasuke noticed with absolute disdain that its horn started glowing pink. Its eyes shone with unadulteraged rage.
"Stop running, pansy-ass!" It bellowed at him with a sonorous, booming voice, "I will purify you!"
Sasuke didn't stop sprinting. He was proper legging it now. He had to get away from this cultish horse princess.
Note: Feel free to review. I actually rely a lot on feedback I get. So, if you have any suggestions, complaints, questions, whatever, do tell me.