It was 10am when I parked outside the Bonds Office. I'd decided that as Friday was now the only weekday I was working, it would be my turn to buy the donuts.
"Girl, you've been ripped off!" Lula exclaimed as she opened the box. "Where are the rest of the donuts?"
"I thought six would be enough. I'm only having one."
"One donut? You better just have one donut. Don't go changing your mind and eating my donuts."
The Bonds Office door opened and Lester and Hal walked in.
Lula turned to them, "You can't have no donuts. Wonder Woman here only bought six."
"Don't you dare say anything. I'm having one donut. I'm going to the gym five days a week. I'm allowed to have one donut," I said, grabbing my Boston Cream and daring someone to tell me no.
Lester held up his hands, "No arguments from me, Beautiful. Everyone deserves a cheat day. Connie, any files for us?"
She picked up a stack of files and handed them over.
Thinking of skips, I thought about who I had left to bring in – Dougie, Rosa and William Hodge. I could handle Dougie and Rosa with Lula, or frankly by myself, which may in fact go more smoothly. But for Hodge I'd need real back up.
"Hey Lester, are you free tomorrow?" I already knew he wasn't working – I'd written the roster. "I need some help with a skip."
"You need help with skip? What am I? Chopped liver?" Lula said working up a head of steam.
I turned to her. "You want to help bring in William Hodge?" I asked sceptically. "6'4", built like a fridge, mean SOB?"
"Of course! Ain't nothing we can't do together. We're partners!"
I wasn't sure I liked our chances but we'd faced worse before.
Lester looked concerned. "Give us a call if you need any help."
I nodded. "I'll call you if it goes sideways. First stop is Dougie anyway."
"Dougie? Excellent, he might still have some handbags. I need a new handbag to go with this ensemble." Lula was wearing acid green tights, which were far too small for her, a fluro orange crop top and white platform sneakers. "The problem here is it's got be casual enough to go with my active wear, but still has to make a statement, you know? Let's take the Firebird – crank some bass. Get things going. Make up for the lack of sugar from the lack of donuts."
At this time of the morning, Dougie was home with Mooner.
"Hey dudette. How's it hanging?"
"Hey Mooner. Dougie here missed his Court date and we have to take him back downtown."
"Really, now?" asked Dougie.
"Yeah, Steph, we were just settling in for a Simpsons marathon."
"Messing up a TV marathon seems like cruel and unusual punishment to me," said Lula, looking like she might be considering a long stay. "Maybe we better stick around until it ends?"
Ugh. I wasn't totally opposed to this course of action, but I also had three files currently open. I needed to get going. I turned to Dougie. I was guessing he still had some merchandise stashed in his garage.
"Dougie, if we go down the station now, Lula and I will both buy a bag from you. She needs something to complete her outfit, and I need a new gym bag."
"You going to the gym, Steph?" asked Mooner. "Good for you. Your health is your greatest investment," he said, chomping into a stack of Pringles.
I took a deep breath to hold my temper. Did everyone have an opinion on this?!
We rifled through the boxes Dougie had stacked in the garage. Lula picked out an an electric purple cross-body bag. I chose a new duffle bag. It was red and black and matched my new tights.
We handed Dougie over to at the booking desk and I collected my receipt for Connie. We were two for two with minimal fuss. Maybe we were getting better at this.
It was now past midday, and my research told me I'd find William Hodge nursing a beer at a dive bar on the third block of Stark Street.
We pulled up out the front in Lula's Firebird.
"Ok, so how do you want to do this? I'll go in the front, you cover the back?"
"Nah, girl. We just go in the front and tell him what's what. We're bounty hunters. We don't take no shit from no one."
I could see several flaws in this plan, but Lula was already barging her way through the door.
She walked right up to him and poked him in the shoulder, "Hey, you William Hodge?"
"Who wants to know?" he asked, swivelling to face her.
"We do. We represent your bail bonds agency, and you are in violation of your bond agreement."
Hodge slowly stood up from the bar stool. I knew his height and weight stats but he looked a lot more imposing in person.
He slowly looked Lula up and down. "You think you're going to take me in, fatty?"
"Hey, who you calling fat? I'll have you know, this here, is all muscle. I am in peak physical condition, and my partner here, goes to the gym."
Hodge smirked. "All muscle, huh? Well, let's see how strong you are then." I watched as he picked Lula up and carried her, arms outstretched to the door. Lula struggled and flailed but her legs were too short.
When he reached the door, he had to turn to use his shoulder. Lula used the opportunity to kick him in the knee. Hodge went down like a ton of bricks and Lula's elbow connected with his head as she landed on him.
Lula untangled herself and stood up. "See? Told you I was strong," she said to Hodge, who was now unconscious on the barroom floor.
I used my cuffs to restrain him and dialled Lester, glancing around the bar. Thankfully, this was the sort of place where everyone minded their own business. No one seemed eager to get involved.
He answered on the second ring. "Hey, Beautiful. You change your mind about needing my help?"
"Yeah, Les. We've got Hodge but he's unconscious and I don't think he's going to fit in the Firebird, if we could even get him to it."
"Where are you?" I gave him the address.
He paused and I could hear him tapping on the screen in the fleet vehicle. "We'll be there in seven minutes."
Les and Hal rolled up and hauled Hodge out and into the back of their SUV, restraining him to the floor bolts in case he woke up. Lula and I followed them to the station where two junior uniforms took him inside, and I went with them to get my body receipt.
Thankfully Joe wasn't there. I wasn't covered in any unpleasant substances – and as far as apprehensions went, this one had been fairly tame, but I knew he'd find something to comment on and I didn't want to hear it.
Receipt in hand, I scanned the carpark. I knew that the Firebird wouldn't be there – cops gave Lula the creeps. What I didn't expect, was a Rangeman SUV to be parked in the corner. Lester powered down his window, "Need a lift, Beautiful?"
"Thanks, Les. My car's at the Bonds Office."
"Hop in."
The silence on the ride over was punctuated by calls over the Rangeman radio. Thankfully, there didn't seem to be anything urgent taking place. I didn't like using up Rangeman resources for my skips, but I knew enough to know there were jobs Lula and I just couldn't handle.
Lester glanced in the rear-view mirror, "You know your partner's supposed to make this job easier, right?" It seems Ranger wasn't the only Merry Man with ESP.
I nodded.
"Maybe keep the more dangerous skips to Saturdays from now on, when one of us can go with you? What Lula doesn't know won't hurt her."