Another long day of work in the hanger fixing up broken machines. Lately, Tails had grown accustomed to pulling all-nighters in order to avoid thinking too hard about his feelings. Another unhealthy coping mechanism he had learned at a very young age once again being put into practice in spite of his attempts at breaking the bad habit. Now, however, was the end of the day. Technically speaking, it was the very next day.
At just half past two in the morning, the dead tired kitsune lay down on a hill not too far from his home, his tired eyes fixated on the stars in the night sky above. Events from the past month flooding in his head, all of him and Amy together. The wish on the fountain. Working on his outfit together. Flying to Angel Island to check on Knuckles. Going out to dinner. Flying above her, using his spinning Tails as a makeshift umbrella. Enjoying a movie and some shopping. Falling asleep in her office building's lobby. Passing out and her taking care of him. The way she ran her fingers through his bangs so tenderly.
Her smile.
Nothing made him happier than seeing her happy. The look of joy on her face always seems to brighten his mood. Above all else, her happiness is what he wants the most. In a post-Eggman world where no evil threatens their lives, he had made it his new mission to protect her happiness. Maybe he'd lost his touch. Maybe he wasn't a fighter anymore. Maybe he had once again returned to his old, cowardly self as the high from all that bravery eroded away.
But none of that mattered, because when she looked sad, it all returned in an instant.
That's why he's willing to throw away any and all chance of her learning how he feels. Why settle for the sidekick of her hero when it's the hero who will make her truly happy? She's the damsel in distress, Sonic is the hero. Of course they were meant to be. That's how these kind of stories end.
But she's not just some damsel in distress. She's strong enough to lift such a heavy hammer effortlessly. Sure, maybe she's a girly-girl who likes romcoms and shopping and fashion, but she's by no means some ditzy clueless girl. She was an intelligent woman. She just didn't like to show it off. Sure, she had anger issues. That's why she took anger management.
Besides, isn't she kinda cute when she gets mad?
At least to him she was. Granted, to Miles Prower, Amy Rose could look cute doing anything. Not just cute, beautiful. More beautiful than the stars that he was staring at. Attractive, even. No doubt about that. Yes, he found her highly attractive. But she was more than just looks. She was sweet, kind, caring, and understanding. The whole package. Simply put, she was perfect.
And simply put, he was not.
A mountain of insecurities and cowardice. Wasted potential. Forever living in the shadow of someone greater, never able to establish his own legacy. A depressed mess of a kitsune. Yes, Miles Prower was the spitting image imperfection. Though, now that he thought about it, she wasn't exactly perfect. There were the obvious anger issues. The hyperfixation of her hero. At times, yes, her attitude.
But he didn't care. Her imperfections made her perfect for him.
Thus, the logical seed of conflict sprouted in his mind. Why did her imperfections make her beautiful while his own imperfections made him ugly? The obvious answer was that there was a double standard at play. One response fueled out of love and admiration, the other fueled out of self-hatred and a low self-esteem. Maybe he were a bit dumber, this logical fallacy wouldn't eat away at him so much. Unfortunately, he was a fox of considerable intelligence.
Unfortunately? Is this really what he thought of himself? Did he really view his intellect as a curse? No, of course he didn't. He was just finding another aspect of himself to tear apart for no reason. Why did he do that? He didn't have the answer to that. Maybe a therapist would? He'd gone before, but it had been a while. What would that even be like?
It didn't matter, he was fine anyways.
…No. No, he absolutely wasn't fine in the slightest. The last two weeks or so had been such a huge emotional rollercoaster. Old wounds, new wounds, both opening and closing left and right. The world was such a strange place. Eggman had been defeated for ten years now, but he still had problems. Guess that's just life, isn't it? One day your biggest problem in life is a maniac bent on world domination, the next it's growing up and realizing you'll never escape your older brother's shadow.
Because Sonic is the hero, and Tails is the sidekick. The hero always gets the girl. Always.
Even if they don't want them.
Tails let out a long, depressed sigh. Was this how he was destined to live his life? Never once telling Amy how he felt? Watching Sonic slowly warm up to her, maybe even fall in love with her? Just how much heartbreak will he be able to take watching all that unfold?
As much as he needs to.
Because she'll smile more than she ever did when he and her were together, and that smile was all that mattered.
But what if Eric was right? What if they were a complete mismatch? If Amy came to terms with Sonic not loving her, would he feel ready to tell her then? Would he ever feel ready? How did he even know when to tell her?
"Tell her how you feel."
The one consistent piece of advice he'd gotten. Even Robotnik told him that. Robotnik. His once greatest nemesis, now friendly acquaintance of sorts. Weird how that turned out, huh? But he hasn't told him how to tell her. No one did. Did they even know how? What would he say? What could he say? Why was it so hard to look her in the eyes and say, "I love you." It's three words. Eight letters. One sentence. There was no reason it should be this unreasonably difficult to say this to someone
And yet, it was.
And for all his intelligence, this was one conundrum he couldn't figure out. Maybe he was ok with that. Maybe he was ok with being unable to tell her. Maybe it was okay that she didn't know how he felt.
Maybe he didn't have to tell her how he felt.
Or maybe he just likes to lie to himself. Then again, maybe lying to himself would make her happier in the long run. It didn't matter to him either way. The stars were twinkling ever so bright. The night sky made him feel calm. He wondered if it made her feel calm.
He thought about her smiling face as he stared into the night sky, and a tear fell down his face.
She hated her room. At least, the pictures that hung everywhere around it. Pictures of him. Her hero. Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy Rose wanted desperately to not think about how much of her life was spent chasing after him. The last thing she wanted to think about was all the times she asked him out on a date. All the times she demanded he marry her.
But the pictures of him all around her room were a constant reminder of her stupidity. Why hadn't she noticed? Why hadn't she realized how uncomfortable he was? Was she that selfish? Did she really, truly only think about what she wanted and not what he wanted for so long? How many times had he expressed a great deal of discomfort with the idea of romantic relationships without her noticing?
No, she had noticed. Of course she did. She just told herself that he was shy. Shy? Right, because the constant insistence that he didn't need a girlfriend, the running away, the disgust at the very idea of marriage were totally just acts of shyness. Right. No, at the end of the day she just wanted her hero all to herself. She wanted nothing more out of life than to be his girlfriend. His wife. His lover.
But he doesn't want a girlfriend, or a wife, or a lover. He wants friends, nothing more than that. He doesn't need anyone in his life that is more than just a friend. Had she ever even considered that idea? Of course not. She hadn't considered him a loving life without her in the picture, let alone him not wanting one at all. She just wanted to fantasize about him lovingly running his hands through her hair, kissing her, telling her she's his.
All Amy really wants now is to see her hero happy. To see him have that warm, joyous smile on his face. A smile that her love could never give him. She wiped away the tears from her eyes, not that mattered anyways. Her eyes were already getting watery again. She couldn't stand it. This room.
She needed some fresh air.
Out on the front porch, she sat and looked up at the night sky. Amy stared up at the twinkling stars that she could barely make out thanks to the streetlights. She frowned, wishing there was a place she could get a clearer view of the sky. That's when she remembered something Tails had told her.
"You should see the stars from here. When I've got a lot on my mind, I like to come here and stare up at the stars and just think for a while. It helps me relax. I guess I thought that it might help you relax as well."
She smiled as she remembered that evening on the hill. He was always there for her, making her feel better. She felt special around him, though for the life of her she couldn't figure out why. It's no wonder he thought of her as his best friend. They were there for each other a lot, weren't they? He'd probably comfort her if she came to him about her situation.
Of course he would. He'd look at her with those big, blue eyes and listen to her pour her heart out. He'd give her hugs and let her cry on his shoulder. He'd help her calm down and remind her to breathe. He'd smile at her softly when it's all over and tell her everything would be ok. He did it all the time when they were kids. He still does it.
He's a sweet guy.
Sweet, smart… cute… admittedly quite handsome… What was she thinking about? She shook her head to clear it. Her head was a complete mess. Thoughts raced around all jumbled up and clumped together. How desperately she wanted to just destroy something. Break something with her hammer. Maybe smash all those photos in her bedroom.
The first thing they taught in anger management was that if you get so upset you want to break something, take a deep breath and count to ten. So that's what she did.
Deep inhale. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten. Slow exhale.
Now think of a better way to handle the situation.
Tomorrow, she's giving Tails a visit. Let everything off her chest. He'd help her feel better. He always did. It was good to talk to someone, especially a close friend. Amy smiled warmly at the thought of Tails comforting her. How lucky was she to have a best friend like him? Sure, he wasn't perfect, but no one was.
His biggest problem was his lack of self-love and self-confidence. Years of being called Sonic's sidekick and failed business ventures seemed to have eroded away all the confidence and bravery that he had built up from fighting Eggman throughout the years. It wasn't fair that's all people knew him for. She never saw him as Sonic's sidekick. She always saw him as his friend.
How desperately she wanted to build back up his confidence. Help get a business off the ground again. Share her business experience and teach him how to manage a company. She wished she were next to him right now, listening to him talk about his machines. She liked hearing him talk about the things he worked on. It was interesting to her. Fascinating. Pretty cool even.
Amy's eyes returned to the stars again. Was he looking at them right now? What was he thinking about? Was he thinking about her as much as she was thinking about him? Why on earth was she thinking about him so much to begin with? Why was she smiling?
When had she stopped crying?
Just minutes ago, the tears wouldn't stop. Now they were all gone and she was smiling at the stars in the sky. Why? All she had done was think about Tails? Why did that make her happy? Was it how kind he was? Was it because they'd hung out so much lately? Now that she thought about it, even Sonic had pointed out that they had been spending a lot of time together recently. Why was that?
Because they were friends. The best of friends. They trusted each other. They knew how to make the other happy. Calling him cute seemed to make him happy. He had a lot of things about him that made him cute. Did he think she was cute? Why did she care so much all of a sudden? Why did she want him to think she was cute?
She stared at the ground, confused. She didn't know why, but she needed to see him. She had to see him. Tomorrow. After work. As soon as she could. She needed to go back inside and get some rest so she wasn't tired by the time she got to speak with him.
Amy stood up, just in time to see a car speed by, certainly going over the speed limit. She blinked. Did she really just see five people crowded together in a car speed past her neighborhood at two in the morning? Was one of them Vector? In a car that small? She shook her head. Yeah, she needed to go to bed right now. She was seeing things.
Author's note: Another short but sweet one. Next two might be a bit short as well, but I promise they'll start getting longer after that. I hope you guys enjoyed this. Remember to read & review, thanks for all your support.