Chapter Nine

It was a normal day for most people, with the same dreary bluish skyline and mundane aesthetic. A normal mid September day for most of the people of Forks, but for me the thirteenth day of the month happened to be my birthday.

And it just so happened that today I was turning eighteen, which aggravated me quite immensely at the knowledge that now I knew vampires existed meant I was given another year of mortality instead of immortality. I had to be patient, I kept reminding myself. I needed to keep myself from acting pathetic and falling on my knees while begging the vampire family that had taken me into their family without hesitation to bite me. I was not going to degrade myself into crying tears and crying, begging for something that I would eventually get.

I had barely woken up to see a box sitting at the end of my bed, a box that held an outfit that Alice most likely had bought for me to celebrate my birthday.

I sighed in annoyance, waiting for the day I would be able to take care of the psychic girl once I would become a vampire. I did not need to have her seeing any future of mine, I was lucky enough that she had not seen me killing Lauren Mallory and Mike Newton. If she had things would have fallen apart for me, I didn't want to imagine what they would have done if they learnt I wasn't the precious, innocent human girlfriend of their prodigal son.

Getting up from the bed and going to the end of the bed to open the box. I peered into the box and pulled the soft tissue paper away to reveal the outfit Alice had picked out for me. I had to admit that the clothes were stunning, and they were the highest quality. I thought they were perfect for me, since they were in darker shades than the usual pure white or light colors that many often saw me wearing in order to show off the charade.

A gothic Victorian elegant Burlesque black cape coat jacket was the first thing I saw. There was an overlapping corset upon the top with diamonds in the middle. Black skinny jeans and Victorian inspired heeled boots finished off the look.

I quickly put on the outfit and brushed out my hair before putting on a diamond encrusted headband, making sure that the front of my bangs had been pulled back in order to show off my features. Dramatic makeup covered my face and brought out the brown of my eyes, also making them larger.

Downstairs Charlie was waiting for me in the kitchen.

There was a plate of pancakes and whipped cream upon the top of the stacked pancakes sitting on the square kitchen table. The candle that was resting in the middle of the top of the pancakes was waiting to be lit by the match that was next to the plate. There was a medium sized box that was sitting on the other side of the plate. There was no wrapping upon it, which in return showed that it was a normal cardboard box.

"Happy birthday, Bells."

"Thanks, Dad."

I sat down at the kitchen table and lit the candle upon the pancakes before blowing them out once Charlie sang me the traditional birthday song. I pulled the candle out before it could drip any wax onto the surface of the pancakes.

The last thing I needed was to eat pancakes that had wax on them. I poured some maple syrup on them and began to eat them, finding I was hungrier than I thought, and they were in decent shape and quality, for once Charlie had done good with cooking.

Once I was finished with the pancakes Charlie waited patiently for me to open the birthday present that was being given to me. I opened it, noting there was a handheld camera that was in a light pink hue (ew, the last thing I needed was a girly color but whatever), and a scrapbook that was meant for me to put pictures into them.

Edward soon appeared and after an awkward conversation with Charlie, we went to the high school. Unsurprisingly I spent the whole school day ignoring everyone and trying to only imagine killing people instead of actually committing murder for the whole world to see. I was incredibly lucky when it came to having two victims, but then again, they were not being killed in the middle of school.

By the time school had ended Alice had almost talked my ear off, as she rattled off about the birthday party, she had set up for me at the Cullen Residence.

She had made sure that my outfit didn't need to be changed into something else, the clothes she had picked out for me to wear were meant for the whole day and not something for just a handful of hours. It was a saving grace, something I was grateful for, because I didn't want to be dolled up by her again, put into designer clothes and have my whole appearance altered because she had decided to claim me as her living Barbie doll.

Charlie was a little disappointed when he heard this news, as I arrived back to his house to put my school things away. He had taken off the rest of the day, so he could sit around and watch movie marathons with me, but it turns out that the vampire clan had decided they would sink their fangs into his daughter. Said daughter just wanted everything to go by smoothly, so I could go home and get some much-needed rest.

Acting as though I had happy feelings, acting as though I was like any other person, drained me. I wanted to be away, and to just let out my aggressions upstairs in the attic. I couldn't cut myself and pour any of blood onto the paintings ever since I had entered the Cullens' lives. Otherwise, they would think that I was self-harming myself because I had depression, when in actuality I was self-harming because I wanted my blood to be used in paintings.

"I told Alice that there was no need for this, that you aren't a big party person."

I tore myself away from my thoughts and instead focused on how I was sitting in the front passenger seat of Edward's Volvo. He had the radio on, one of his numerous compositions was playing, the soft and relaxing music actually soothed me some. I could see why someone would like this kind of music; I didn't really have a specific taste of music that I liked over everything else.

"Um…it's okay…at least there will be cake, right?"

Edward chuckled some, smiling brightly at me, so that there were crinkles that were coming up in the sides of his eyes. The setting sun sent out glints upon his auburn hair and his pale skin. Skin that would actually shimmer like diamonds in the full sun, which was kind of ridiculous and the only thing I saw that I hated when it came to vampires.

"It would make sense that you're so sweet because you love sweets," Edward joked, while on the inside I rolled my eyes at the lame pun I couldn't help but giggle a little bit. He seemed to puff up his chest at the little comment, glad he had gotten a positive response from me.

Arriving at the Cullen Residence, I noted how there were lights that were strung up through the trees that were the closest to the house.

There were lights that were strung up on the front porch, sending out little glows of gold. Everything looked as though it was representing all that was good in the world, having its arms open for anyone no matter who they were or what they were like. They were open to me, but I didn't quite enjoy the sight of the house, all I wanted was to be just like the inhabitants of the house…and it was taking too fucking long for me to become a vampire also.

Edward came around the car once he parked it in the driveway and opened the door for me. An obvious product of the time period he had come from. Seemed like it was engraved.

I unbuckled my seatbelt and held out my hand. He kissed me on the top of my hand and gently pulled me out of the car before he shut the door behind me. His arm wrapped around mine and together we headed up to the front porch of the house, which opened to reveal the doctor and his architect wife. They were dressed in their normal soft, light color palette they always seemed to wear. Just an outward display of their martyr personalities.

Reaching Esme and Carlisle I was soon pulled into hugs and kisses onto my head, as if I were their daughter already. They ushered me inside and behind me Edward followed me, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his jeans as he cooly glanced around. He had no reason to be upset with how things were, there was no reason why he should be complaining how Esme and Carlisle seemed to favor me over him now. I would soon take over as their favorite between us.

The rest of the Cullens were throughout the open space in the front room of the house, where there was also a small pile of boxes that were sitting on the coffee table. Alice was jumping up and down, her hands clapping together, as she wore the same purple dress, I remembered her wearing during prom last year–which was not fun to say the least. I could have gone the rest of my life, both mortal, and eventual immortal death without the dumb social obligation.

Rosalie was standing closer to the windows that looked out to the back of the property, towards the awkward winning garden that Esme had lovingly planted. It was a shame that it wouldn't be used for a good half a century if not a century from now, since the Cullens claimed they wouldn't come back until then after Edward, Alice, and I graduated.

Emmett was sitting on one of the couches in an awkward position, one that made me question if it was an actual position a human could be in. Most likely the position that Emmett was sitting in could only last a few seconds for humans but for vampires it could last forever. He had his phone in his hands, and he was texting someone, most likely one of his online friends that shared the same satire comedy that Emmett had. He'd have to eventually stop talking to them, in time, and then move on to another chat room to find friends once again.

Jasper was in the corner of the room, his hands folded together with his arms behind him. He peered at me, that hatred and darkness that resonated throughout him sent arousal throughout me. Not anywhere as close as it was when it came to Aro, but if I had to choose any of the Cullens to consume me it would have been Jasper. Especially considering the fact that I had dreams that Jasper would drain me dry as he would have his way with me, sweat dripping down my body and muscles straining from how he would wreck me without any remorse.

One of his eyebrows arched upwards, as though he was challenging me to say anything to him. He always made sure he was Alice's silhouette and only wasn't around her when Alice requested it. He stayed in the woods around the school during school hours since he had already graduated and wanted to make sure that nothing bad would happen to Alice.

I had barely turned my attention away from him when Emmett appeared in front of me and scooped me up in his arms, slinging me onto one of his shoulders while he chanted happy birthday to me as he danced around the room. He had to be careful or else he would end up making me throw up or throwing me over his shoulder, which in return could possibly break my skull open. Then all hell would break loose, and they would eagerly be drinking the blood pooling from my skull.

"Emmett, careful! I'd like for Bella to open her birthday presents without having to worry about having a concussion," Alice chimed, giving him an exasperated look.

Emmett pouted before he placed me back down onto my feet, finding he didn't like how he had to stop his chanting and celebrating for me.

It was obvious they weren't accustomed to celebrating birthdays in a long time. Who knew when the last birthday was? And why should they have to celebrate the years they were mortal?

The years that were important were ones that marked immortality.

The anniversaries of their rebirth, that was what vampires should be celebrating, not their stupid human birthdays, because that life died the very moment they had been turned. I would certainly make sure that this would happen for me, there would be no need for birthdays for me–only on the anniversary of my rebirth into a dark goddess, because I sure as hell was going to make my place in the vampiric world as a goddess.

"Bella! Presents, and then cake!"

Everyone moved to get to their spots around the coffee table and couches. It seemed like Alice was more in charge than anything else. She was the one who made sure to make the most important decisions. They flocked to her, when they knew that things were working out for them, but they were probably demanding her to remember her place when things went sour. Things were really going to get sour for her when she wouldn't be able to defend her reason for me becoming a vampire after I would show my true colors. Perhaps they would allow me to execute her…which also meant I would need to execute Jasper but that southern cowboy sure was nice to look at.

Maybe we would play together before I killed him…or maybe he really was devoted to his pixie-like wife and would never even consider having an wandering eye. That would be a shame, but I could still play with boys like him, after I would be turned. Seduce them into having sex with me and tear them apart while they would be too lost in the bouts of passion, I would surely give him. Passion and pleasure and pain, oh yes, it sounded delicious.

I was led to the couch and sat down before a box was given to me.

I could already tell that it was empty, and I almost wanted to ask if this was a joke. Knowing that the card had said Emmett and Rosalie, I knew it was most likely Emmett that had come up with the idea. Rosalie wouldn't mind it, since in a way she would be giving what she wanted to give me…an empty box. Or maybe she wouldn't have even wanted to give me a box.

I made sure to act amused, barely paying attention to him and the others as he claimed he had gotten a new radio for my shitty truck. I didn't try to defend the truck, even though they knew I wasn't that impressed with the piece of shit given to me. I did giggle at some of what he had said, which in return made them smile at the obvious amusement coming from me at the gift.

Alice went over to where her box was and handed it to me, claiming that it was from her and Jasper.

She fiddled with some pieces of her obsidian hair and bit the corner of her lip. She might not be able to see what I would do with the reaction, after all she was able to see only so much when it came to my future. A blurriness that helped me commit my murders.

As I went to open the box, I hadn't expected for a piece of the paper to come and slice me across the finger. I snapped my head up when crashing began to resonate around me, making me turn my head to see that Jasper was trying to get me. His eyes were so dark, and his teeth almost seemed to click together. His arms were being held back by Emmett and Rosalie, while Alice tried to reassure him that everything was okay. It was enough for Edward to push me backwards, only instead of a gentle push behind me he shoved me hard enough that I went flying.

As I hit whatever glass was behind me, probably from the decorative vases that were up against this wall, I moaned from the intense pain that suddenly hit me. A normal person would be scared out of their minds and moaning in anger and fear.

Instead, I was moaning because I was turned on by the blood spilling from my body. I wanted venom coated teeth pressing against my skin, hands that could easily crush me and destroy upon my skin also in order for me to be killed. Such a brutal, beautiful death, bloody and straight to the point.

I was turned on because Jasper was staring at me as though I was a piece of meat.

I smirked at him and brought my hand up, one of my fingers reaching up and beckoning for him to come and finish what he started. I kept my eyes focused on him, despite the fact that Edward appeared next to me and began to fuss over me. He had caused this and yet he was acting as though I was the one who had decided to throw myself at an inhuman speed into the decorative glass vases that Esme just had to buy.

I barely paid attention to Edward as he scooped me up and hurried me in the direction of where Carlisle's office was.

I didn't know how he was able to control the thirst, since he and all the other vampires claimed my blood was addictive and if it was spilled vampires would go into a frenzy in order to get one drop of my blood. Maybe he was able to avoid this because he was holding his breath, there was no need for him to breathe, since it was for appearance's sake.

I sat down on Carlisle's desk and Carlisle soon came into the room.

He quietly came over to me and peered at me, bringing his cool fingers up to move my head side to side in order to make sure that there weren't any major arteries that were stuck on my throat. He continued to do so with the rest of any skin that he could see, frowning when he saw that I would need stitches. I merely shrugged, hissing some because it stretched out the cuts and made me bleed even quicker. I shot a sheepish grin towards them, in an apologetic manner.

"Edward, go and check on Jasper. Let him know that you forgive him. I'll do Bella's stitches."

Edward opened his mouth, as though he was about to tell him they were going to do the opposite. Yet his mouth shut quickly when Carlisle turned his attention back to his prodigy, his eyes dark enough and features serious enough for him to know that any kind of freewill he often gave to the coven was gone. This was an order from the head of the coven.

"Of course, Carlisle. I'll be right back, I promise, Bella."

Edward almost came forward in order to kiss me on the forehead only to stop. He was strained, his eyes darkening even further. Carlisle stood up quickly and shoved Edward out of the room, before shutting the door behind him closed. He shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair before he came over to me with gentleness.

The entire time that Carlisle painstakingly pulled out the pieces of glasses and swabbed my cuts with rubbing alcohol I couldn't help but have my eyes stuck on how steady he was. There was not one part of his irises that darkened from their warm golden hue. The light of the lamp sent out an angelic glow upon him and he smiled some, finding it amusing at how enthralled I was when it came to him working. He was so beautiful, but he reminded me of the opposite of what I wanted.

I didn't want the golden eyes, the kind heart, or the blond hair.

I wanted dark, flowing hair with sharp features and crimson eyes. I wanted the vampire who would shove someone on the ground and step on them, making sure they would know their place. I wanted someone who had no inch of goodness in him, someone whose blood was of poison along with their heart.

Edward came into the office when Carlisle was almost finished with the stitches. He loosened up his broad and stiff shoulders and came forward.

Carlisle didn't tear his attention away from his process of fixing me up, merely saying, "I hope that you were sincere in your apology, Edward. Remember that he didn't have our guidance from the beginning of his transformation. Alice helped as much as she could, but the decades with human blood outweigh decades of animal blood."

Edward's jaw tensed at the mention of this, enough for me to say, "I don't want you to have troubles with Jasper, Edward. He couldn't help it. He doesn't need forgiveness because there's nothing that needs to be forgiven."

How could I say that I wanted to be cut a thousand times with paper, naked for all to see, and be locked in a room with Jasper? How could I say that I wanted him to drink my blood? I wanted him to give me the immense pain and pleasure the venom inside of them must have. I wanted him to enter me, and rock us into an animalistic dance while he consumed my blood.

I knew I couldn't say this, no matter what. No matter if everything inside of me wanted to scream out that if I had to be mated to one of the Cullens then I wanted to be the mate of Jasper? He was the darkest one out of them all. He was the one that was the second oldest in the coven, and half of the time he didn't even look like he wanted to be here.

Only Jasper hated my guts, he could feel the darkness inside of me. It did not make him afraid, weary and shaken from it. Instead, he was pissed off at the audacity I had with coming into their lives, playing this innocent role. I was nothing like his precious little Alice, who could do no wrong in his eyes, and I was nothing like the rest of his family either.

Edward doted on me that night, laid on the bed next to me and held me in his arms. He kissed the top of the wrappings that Carlisle had secured upon my arms. He whispered how he loved me, for the very first time, but didn't make me feel as though I needed to tell him I loved him too. He pressed his nose against my hair and took in my scent, it was lavender and lilac. A fresh field of wildflowers, at least that was what the vampire family had.

Charlie wasn't too excited with the fact he would deal with a daughter that had gotten cuts all over her from tripping into the Cullens' vases during the birthday party they hosted.

I reassured him that it was just an accident and one time deal, I was making sure there would be no need for me to be stuck at home and babied. He huffed in response and folded his arms against his chest, not appreciating that I would tell him he shouldn't worry about me. It was his right to worry about me, I was his only child and only daughter, the product of the doomed marriage he had with Renee.

For a week after the party everything seemed fine.

There was nothing wrong, I was going through another week of school in this gloomy town. I was still forcing myself to act like I was a normal person, knowing that I would have to wait to murder my next victim after graduation and away from the town. I had barely managed to escape from being found out when it came to Lauren and Mike.

Then a week later came the words: "we're leaving, Bella. And when I mean leaving, I don't mean you. We've—"

Anger, so much anger took over me and my body. As Edward came up with a sorry excuse about how he was only fascinated with me because of his inability to read my mind, along with my scent, I wanted nothing more than to sucker punch his esophagus. I wanted to make him suffer, for he made me suffer through this facade all for jack shit!

How the fuck was I going to become a vampire goddess, destined to rule alongside the three great kings of the Volturi….

Wait.

That's what I needed to do, I needed to find a way to gain the attention of the Volturi.

I was certain that it wouldn't be too hard. I'd just have to wait a few weeks before putting a list together, in order to make everyone believe that Edward and his family's departure brought me sadness instead of vengeance.

Then, I'd make sure that the Cullens wished they never left me.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: UPDATE 2 OF 3.

TWILIGHT DOESN'T BELONG TO ME

EMMY

NEXT CHAPTER: BELLA DECIDES TO LET OUT HER FUSTRATIONS ON SOMEONE IN PORT ANGELES ONLY TO HAVE FOUR VAMPIRES (WINK, WINK) APPEAR.