Hello my lovely readers! We are back with a new chapter!
Before we dive in, let's open some fan mail
Does Audrey have any least favorite songs or any that annoys her?
This was tough, since she loves music, but some music that annoys her are techno, rap (especially with swearing) and heavy metal. Usually makes her head pound.
Thanks for that!
Now, let's continue our story...
Season 1, episode 5; You said you'd handle it!
"Prepare to have your face rearranged, pal." Cuphead confidently announced as he pulled a blindfold over his eyes.
"You're messing with the wrong mug, buddy." Mugman smirked, as he pulled his own blindfold down.
Now, before I go on with the story, let me explain what's going on. It's another Friday afternoon in the cottage and thankfully not much has happened for a few days. This, however, was an interesting way to be entertained. Elder Kettle was outside in the garden and Audrey and Josh went shopping.
That gave the boys a chance to play one of their favorite games; blind-folded pillow fight. Now, that sounds pretty dangerous. Could you get hurt? Yes? Can you hurt others? Yes. Can you break things? Most likely. Would you wanna play? Heck yeah.
Anyways, the boys got in position, fluffing their pillows for battle.
"Three…" Cuphead began.
"Two…" Mugman continued.
"One, go!" Cuphead shouted.
And thus the fight began. Or something like that.
Yelling, the boys ran past each other and swung their pillows wildly in the wind. While they were reckless, they were pretty clueless about if they were hitting one another. Mugman then twirled as Cuphead smacked the floor.
As they were fighting, or trying to, Audrey and Josh returned to the cottage after shopping and met up with Elder Kettle.
"Oh, hello there. How was shopping?"
"Good, got all the supplies and here is your change." Josh replied, as he handed Elder Kettle some money. "I start my new job next week, so I promise I'll be using my own money."
"Oh, don't worry about it. I'm just happy to help you two." Kettle smiled.
"Say, where are the boys?" Audrey asked. "Surely they would want to help you."
"I didn't have much to do, so I told them they could play in the house." Kettle smiled. "I'm sure whatever they're doing is very friendly and harmless."
Just then, they heard a smash coming from the living room.
"Or not." Audrey muttered as the humans rushed to the door.
Inside, the boys, still blindfolded, stopped fighting when they heard that smash. They were both confused and startled.
"What was that?" Mugman asked nervously.
He and Cuphead removed their blindfolds, looking around the room to see if anything was broken. The radio was still standing, the vase on the table, and the photos and other artifacts still on the wall.
Soooo, what broke?
Cuphead turned and saw the back of Mugman's head, and his eyes grew wide. Unknown to Mugman, his handle was snapped off his head and was on the floor.
"Ooh!" He gasped.
"What is it?" Mugman asked.
"Uh... Nothing, at all. Nothing. Why? What? Why?" Cuphead nervously asked, as he sweated profusely.
Mugman, who obviously didn't believe him, gave Cuphead a suspicious glare.
"Oh, it's something." He then faced the mirror. Everything seemed to be intact. He buffed a tooth, then checked his nose. As he turned his head, he noticed the broken remains of the back of his head. He was in complete shock.
He then slowly turned around to see his handle on the floor. He touches his head, and then screams, just as Audrey and Josh came in.
"Hey, what's going-oh no!" Audrey gasped. She saw the broken handle on the ground and Mugman screaming like a maniac running around the room in a panic. Which is somewhat normal.
As he ran around, Cuphead picked up the handle and looked at it oddly.
"Can you feel this?" He asked. He then proceeds to poke the handle, which makes Mugman stop in his tracks, and then tickles it, making his brother laugh.
The humans were shocked by this. While Mugman was fine everywhere else, seeing him without his handle was a bit odd. It was like a child getting his loose tooth smacked off by his friend while playing a Nerf war game or something.
Mugman snapped his attention back and shouted. "Hey! Give me that!" He then snatched his handle. As he looked at it, he began to splutter, very similar to the time he saw the Devil at the carnival that day.
Audrey, going on 'mom-mode' as she calls it, asked "Ok, can someone explain to me how this happened? I thought you were playing a game."
"We were. We call it blind-folded pillow fight." Cuphead replied. "Something must have happened because well, his handle came off."
"Blind-folded pillow fight?" Josh repeated. "Huh, sounds like a game my siblings and I would play, or me and Steve."
"Yeah, that sounds like it." Audrey grinned, as she held Mugman, who was still sputtering, in her arms and rubbed his back.
Cuphead placed a hand on his brother's shoulder, and claimed.
"Buddy, relax. We'll handle it." That statement made Mugman glare at him and Audrey rolled her eyes.
"Erm, I mean, take care of it." Cuppy quickly corrected. Taking the handle, he licked the ends of it, twirled Mugman around and stuck it back onto Mugman's head.
"Easy as pie. See?"
Mugman swooned, delighted by it sticking to his head. Unfortunately, it doesn't last very long and the handle falls off, chipping more small porcelain fragments. Which then made Mugman freak out. Again.
"Boy, that never gets easier." He muttered, wiping sweat from his head.
"Don't worry just yet." Cuphead assured his brother. He gets out a roll of scotch tape, and tapes the handle to Mugman's head. His face was a bit scrunched up and it reminded Audrey of a time where she and a friend would put tape on their faces, to which their mothers had to carefully take off because it was stuck.
"How do I look?" Mugman asked in a muffled voice.
"Good as new." Cuphead smiled.
However, the handle falls off and Mugman yells, again, tape still on his face. Cuphead ponders what to do, since clearly the last few times didn't work. Just then, he gets an idea, and runs out of the house.
During that time, Audrey and Josh managed to get the tape of Mugman's face.
"There you go, sweetie. And don't worry. We'll get your handle back on in no time." Audrey assured him. He sniffled a bit and nodded. Just then, Cuphead returns with a honey-filled beehive.
Now, I have broken things before and using honey isn't really the best choice to make. I mean, I get it's sticky but still.
He waves a few bees away, dips the handle into the honey and sticks it back on.
To their surprise, it stuck better and longer than the previous two ideas, which made the boys very happy.
"And voilà!" Cuphead announced.
"Thanks, Cuphead." Mugman beamed.
As the boys shook hands, a drop of liquid dripped into Cuphead's head. The four of them looked up and lo and behold, a black bear loomed over the boys.
"Oh come on!" Audrey cried.
The bear then proceeds to chase them around the room and eventually beat the boys up. It walks out of the house with the beehive under its arm while the battered brothers laid on the ground, and Josh was hiding behind the couch.
Once they caught their breaths, Cuphead began to ponder once more.
"If only there were some substance that could stick one item to another that didn't attract bears..."
Josh looked at Audrey and asked "Question, why didn't we tell them about that one item they could use?"
"Well, for starters, I don't want to bluntly tell them, and second, I kinda wanted to see how this would go." Audrey replied.
Just then, Mugman rolled onto his front and sobbed, as a puddle of tears began to form.
"Oh, honey, it's ok. We'll get it back on." Audrey claimed as she rushed over and rubbed his back.
"Hold on there, Mugsy. This ain't over till we say it's over." Cuphead announced.
"It's over." Mugman whimpered, looking at Cuphead from his pool of tears.
"Aw! You're getting worked up over nothing." Cupead smiled.
Mugman sniffled a bit before getting mad. Standing up, he asked
"Oh, really? Why don't we snap off your handle too then?!" He attempted to swipe at Cuphead, but his older brother dodged while holding his handle.
"NO! Erm, I mean, no?"
"Ok, let's remember, violence never solved anything." Josh chimed in. "It won't make the situation better if we argue."
Mugman, seeing that his actions were not gonna get anywhere, took a sad sigh, "What if it never sticks back on? A mug without a handle is just a bowl! I'm a mug! I'm Mugman! Not Bowlboy! I don't wanna be Bowlboy!"
"Question; is there someone out there named Bowlboy?" Josh asked.
"Surprisingly, yes." Cuphead claimed. "He's kinda, dorky in my mind, but nonetheless, a decent guy."
Mugman then glared at Cuphead once more and growled at his brother
"I never shoulda let you talk me into this!"
"What?! You were the one begging for a blindfolded pillow fight!" Cuphead argued.
"This is hardly the time to point fingers, Cuphead!" Mugman snapped, ironically pointing his finger at him.
"Well, don't get mad at me!"
"Well, don't get mad at me!"
"I'm the one racking my brain trying to remember what glue is!" Cuphead snapped, tapping his head with his pointer fingers. Then it came to him. "Hey! That's right!
"Glue is glue!" They cheered.
"See? I knew they figured it out." Audrey smiled. "Where's the tube of glue?"
"I believe in that drawer there." The group headed to the kitchen and went towards a drawer that was near the fridge. Finally, they were getting somewhere.
"Here we go." Cuphead smiled as he opened a drawer and found a tube of glue. He pulled on it and found out it was stuck to a mass of objects. He tries to pry it free, but to no avail. "Oh, boy."
While Cuphead continued to get the tube off, Mugman laid on the floor, downhearted.
"I'm never gonna fix my handle. Maybe I am Bowlboy." He glumly claimed.
"Aw, this ain't nothing. We can just get some new glue from Porkrind's." Cuphead suggested.
"There, see? That's an idea." Josh mentioned. "Go to the store, get the glue, fix the handle. Easy peasy."
"But I can't go out looking like this." Mugman protested.
"No one's even gonna notice." Cuphead assured him. Just then, they were all startled by Elder Kettle, who came in, saw Mugman and screamed.
He dashed off out of the room, which caused Mugman to scowl at Cuphead, who laughed nervously.
"How about this; I'll go with Cuphead to get some glue and Josh will stay here with you?" Audrey suggested. "We'll come back and fix the handle."
"O-ok. Guess it'll work." Mugman muttered. Josh knelt down and rubbed his back.
"It'll be ok, Mugsy. We'll fix it in no time." Josh assured him. He nodded and headed to the living room, to where he proceeded to flop on the couch and a blanket covered him. The group, feeling worried, followed him.
"Oh, honey. It's not so bad. We will get that glue for you." Audrey announced.
"Please hurry." He muffled.
"Don't worry. We won't be long." Cuphead assured him.
While Josh sat next to Mugman, Audrey grabbed her purse and headed out the door with Cuphead.
Shortly, the two passed along the dirt road to the shop. Ironically, it was on the road to the still destroyed carnival. Yeah, great memories there.
As they walked, Cuphead piped up. "I'm sorry about this, Audrey. We didn't mean to get into this mess."
"It's alright, Cuphead. I know you guys were having fun, but you need to be more careful when playing games like that." Audrey calmly claimed. "Believe me, I did a lot of stupid things as a kid and sometimes, I would get into a lot of trouble."
"Really? You did stupid stuff when you were little?" Cuphead asked, a bit surprised.
"We were all children once. No one is born a grown up." Audrey giggled. "But besides that, you learn from that and move on."
"Guess that makes sense. Oh, look! There's his shop!" Cuphead pointed.
Audrey looked and sure enough, his shop was there. It was a white wagon with a red roof, with a few windows. The outside of the shop had some paint cans, a barrel with oranges, papers on the wall, lightbulbs as decorations and a green door.
She remembered being near one similar to that in the book, but it was a cute shop nonetheless.
As they approached the door, they heard the static of a radio and an announcer report on a wrestling match.
"It's Frenchy's Dream and Granny's Whiskers! It's Frenchy's Dream! It's Granny's Whiskers! It's Frenchy's Dream... Oh, no! Granny's Whiskers wins by a hair!"
The radio was turned off and the two opened the door to the shop. While seeing all the miscellaneous supplies, decorations and items, Audrey saw Porkrind, sitting behind the counter holding a pamphlet.
He was an anthropomorphic pig, having a portly, yet somewhat muscular build, with skin color similar to humans, a pink snout, and a black curled mustache similar to those typically worn by cartoon villains. He wore a gray shirt with white hems, brown overalls, and a black eyepatch with a gray band. He could have lost in a serious accident, or just used to make himself look cool.
"Knock-knock!" Cuphead called in.
"Hello, Porkrind." Audrey smiled as they came into the store. "We have a bit of an emergency at home."
"Do you now?" The shop owner grunted, with an annoyed face. Audrey could tell he wasn't that person who was happy to see, well, anyone.
"We need a tube of glue bad." Cuphead informed him. "Real bad."
"Gonna be real expensive then." Porkrind simply informed him.
"How expensive are we talking about?" Audrey asked. "I have some cash on me. Though for a tube of glue, it wouldn't seem that expensive."
"Look, this is my shop and I put the prices on them." Porkrind shrugged. "I don't make bargains or deals."
"Come on, Porkrind, we need it badly." Cuphead protested. "We'll pay anything for it."
"Well, la-di-da. Somebody knows the magic words." Porkrind smirked. "So, what are we gluing?"
Audrey reached in her bag and pulled out Mugman's broken handle. That made him wrench and his face turned green.
"Oh, come on, you can't be that repulsed by this." Audrey claimed, annoyed.
Swallowing, Porkrind replied. "Nah. I don't care about his handle. I just ate a rank fish sandwich." He pointed to a fish sandwich in the trash, which smelled and looked awful. Cuphead and Audrey made disgusting faces.
Ok, that's gross.
"Yep. Anyway, I'll sell you the glue. Be back in a jiff."
He got up from his chair and started to the back of the store when he remembered something.
"Oh, uh, just wondering, are you by any chance named Audrey?"
"Uh, yeah that's me." Audrey claimed. "Something up?"
"Someone wanted to drop off a package for ya." He stated. "Don't know who it's from or what's inside, but I didn't want to get into it too much."
He handed her a brown package with a note attached to it before heading back of his store.
Audrey looked oddly at the package. Who would send her a package? She didn't know many people, aside from Sally, but she was a bit lost on the anonymous delivery.
"Who's it from?" Cuphead asked, as he looked at some items.
"I dunno. Doesn't say." She replied.
She opened it up and found a bouquet of fresh roses, a beautiful necklace and box of sweets. She opened the card and it read
"I wanted to give you these, as a token of my affection. You have a lovely voice, and I hope to see you very soon.
-Mr. S."
Audrey arched an eyebrow. Mr. S? Who was this guy? The writing was really unfamiliar and what freaked her out more was he heard her sing.
"Ok, this is creepy. And a waste of time for him." Audrey claimed. She then proceeded to dump the gifts in the trash. While it was sweet that someone sended her a present, she was a married woman, after all, and the idea of her liking someone behind Josh's back wasn't her cup of tea.
"And something tells me I have a pretty good idea who sent it." She muttered.
Just then, Porkrind came back with a box in his hands.
"Well, you have some, right?" Cuphead asked.
"Wrong. I'm outta glue. I get the next shipment in three months." He informed them, placing the empty box down and turning the radio back on.
"Three months?!" The two gasped.
"Oh, great, waiting three months was not what I wanted to hear." Audrey groaned.
"I know. Mugsy will be upset." Cuphead replied, his head drooping.
With a failed shopping trip, they headed back home, with not so great news.
Later, the two headed inside the cottage, still seeing Mugman under the blanket and Josh sitting next to him.
"Well? Any luck?" He asked, standing up.
"Sorry, total bust." Audrey shrugged. "He won't be getting another shipment of it for three months."
"Three months?!" Mugman exclaimed. "Oh no!"
Cuphead sat next to his brother and assured him.
"Aw, come on, Mugsy. Three months will go by like that. You can still go outside. People just need to get used to it."
"Really?" He asked, peeking from the covers.
That made Cuphead startled and jump back.
"WAAAAAAAAAHHH! Sorry. I'm still getting used to it." He sheepishly replied.
Mugman frowned and pulled the blanket back over himself.
"Honey, it's going to be ok." Audrey claimed. "It's only temporary. We'll find a way to get it back on."
Mugman didn't reply and tightened his grip on the covers. Audrey sighed and rubbed his back. He felt so embarrassed, and it broke her heart that he felt so upset about the whole thing.
She then had an idea, but before she could explain her plan, they heard Elder Kettle call out
"Uh, Mugman? Oh, there you are, boy." He came in and carefully picked up Cuphead by his handle and calmly stated "Excuse us for a moment, Cuphead."
"Of course. I'll leave you two alone." Cuphead replied, as he left the room. Audrey stood up and let Kettle sit next to the depressed mug.
"Mugman, I'm sorry I screamed in horror at the mere sight of you, but it just took me by surprise." Kettle informed him. It made sense to Audrey, seeing his handle off was a bit of a surprise. She could see that Mugman peeked out a bit, his eye and his nose showing.
"Oh, but gosh, you boys are just growing up so fast. Your bodies are going through changes." Kettle proceeded.
Josh gave a small groan. "Oh, please don't tell me he's going to explain the whole 'birds and bees' thing from Junior high. That's three years of my life I'll never get back."
"Same. I don't wanna repeat that all over again." Audrey nodded, as a surprised Mugman peeked further out.
"I should've known. It's about time your baby handles fell off." Kettle smiled.
"Baby handle?" Mugman repeated, jumping a bit and his blanket flinging off.
"Baby handle?!" Cuphead chimed in, who was behind the couch looking for loose change or something, and the blanket fell on his head.
Josh and Audrey looked oddly at each other. This was not the idea she had in mind, but it looked like he had one of his own.
"Why, yes. Your baby handles. I still remember the day I lost my baby handle. Back when I was but a wee little kettle." Kettle began. The boys sat on the couch and listened to their guardian.
"I was in the middle of brushing my tiny little toothie, when to my surprise, it happened. Darn it, if my baby handle didn't just pop right off! Like all good boys, I knew that when your baby handle falls off, why, that means you're getting a visit from the Handle Fairy!"
Audey had to hold back a laugh. She understood what he was doing, but she found it pretty funny, not to mention adorable.
"So, I put my baby handle under my pillow and waited. In the morning, I ran over to my bedroom mirror, and there it was. My shiny, new... man handle."
He then showed off his "Man handle" to the boys who looked at it in awe.
"Ah, youth." Kettle sighed.
Mugman, who was now thrilled, hopped from the couch cheering "Woohoo! Boy! Hear that, Cuphead? I'm getting a man handle!"
"Hey! I want a man handle!" Cuphead argued. So, he did what any kid would do when they want the same thing as their sibling or friend; he broke his handle against a wall.
Audrey gave herself a facepalm. Of course Cuphead would do that.
"Well, I guess that saves the Handle Fairy a trip." Kettle claimed.
The three laughed while Josh and Audrey rolled their eyes. The boys then grabbed their broken handles and rushed upstairs, giggling with delight.
"Erm, Elder Kettle, I'm going to take a whim here and say you made that whole thing up?" Josh asked.
"Yep. Those boys are sweet, but gullible. I figured that would help." Kettle shrugged.
"Makes sense. Although, I was kinda hoping to use my sketchpad to draw some glue. Not sure why I didn't come up with that hours ago, but I guess this helps too." Audrey shrugged.
And with that, they decided to let the boys have their moment and get a good night's rest, hoping to have the 'handle fairy' pay a visit.
Night came and went and soon it was the next morning. Audrey and Josh were finishing making breakfast when they heard the boys come down the stairs.
"Elder Kettle! Elder Kettle! Audrey! Josh!" Both cheered as they reached the bottom.
They looked and sure enough, their handles were back on, looking like new.
Elder Kettle was standing in front of a broom closet, where a fairy costume was seen on a coat hanger. Turns out he was the handle fairy, which made Audrey smile.
Kettle looked nervous as the boys arrived, hoping they wouldn't see the costume, or glue he was hiding behind his back. "Oh, uh…"
"The Handle Fairy came!" Mugman cheered.
"Get a load of these man handles!" Cuphead announced as he and Mugsy turned to show their guardian.
It made Audrey think of times when she was little and how she would show her dollar bill to her parents that the 'tooth fairy' sent when she lost a tooth. She was pretty good at wiggling her teeth out, minus the time someone smacked her mouth and made her tooth fall out.
As Kettle tossed the glue into the closet and shut the door, he replied. "Oh! Looks like he-uh, I mean, she did a great job."
He then went to the kitchen to finish making breakfast as the boys grinned from ear to ear with their 'new' handles to Audrey and Josh.
"Wow, looking good, guys." Josh smiled.
"Yeah, love the new look." Audrey added.
"And don't worry, 'cause from now on, we'll be extra careful when it comes to playing with each other or being in danger!" Cuphead announced.
"Wow! Good to hear!" Audrey smiled. Finally, they were listening to her advice. Maybe they'd both be a bit more cautious from now on, especially with the Devil lurking about.
Things might turn out better than she thought.
"To our man handles!" Mugman announced.
Taking their heads off, again mostly cartoon logic, the two cups declared "Cheers!"
They toast with their heads, which then causes them to shatter.
Audrey took a sigh. So much for being a bit more cautious.
"I'll get the glue."
Well, that was a lot to 'handle' (yeah I know, cruddy joke) but glad things worked out. Though this 'Mr. S.' fella, sending her gifts and notes. if you have an idea who it is, let me know.
Anyway, thanks so much for reading! Don't forget to leave a review, but let's avoid the flames please :D