Sorry for not posting in a while, needing a small break, kind of still taking one but felt like posting this chapter :)

Enjoy!

A yelp escaped me as my back collided with the wall, a cold hand squeezed my neck until I felt their fingernails piercing the skin. I was too distracted and was paying the price, not noticing the Strigoi until they had me pinned.

They easily knocked Eddie to the side and focused on me again; I was really starting to get pissed off that they always attacked me first. Briefly, I wondered if they just saw me as the weak link because I was a girl. Right now, I felt pretty weak.

I tried kicking out, my hand wrapped around theirs to try to dislodge their grip but it was pointless. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place and was quickly running out of air.

The Strigoi watched me intrigued, licking their lips after inhaling deeply. "You smell amazing," they exclaimed hungrily, tipping their head closer to me.

"Rose!"

I sent up thanks to whoever was watching over me when I heard Dimitri's voice; a second later the Strigoi was ripped away from me and I was tumbling to the ground, just barely catching myself. Gulping down air now I could breathe freely again.

I couldn't rest, not yet. My stomach was churning and I knew there was more than just one. I spied around me, quickly locating my stake I dropped when I was grabbed. I dodged around Dimitri fighting the Strigoi and snatched it up.

Alberta was fighting another with Mason, and Eddie was still on the ground, his eyes were unfocused but they were open. It was the blood that dripped down from his hairline that worried me, especially when I noticed a third Strigoi with their eyes locked on him.

I scrambled to my feet, managing to intercept them before they could reach him, sending us both to the ground in the alley. It was poorly lit, the concrete unmaintained and uneven. The Strigoi tried to grapple with me but were quick to back off after I sliced the tip of my stake across their chest.

Jumping to my feet, I found them standing opposite me, crouched and ready to fight. They sized me up as I did the same; they were a female about the same size as me, if not shorter. I wondered if they used to be human. Did she live here before she was turned?

She looked the same age as Riley.

Her eyes shifted from me to those behind me, a flicker of hesitation, and then they did something I never thought I would see a Strigoi do. She spun on her heel and ran.

"What the fuck?" I was momentarily stunned before I broke off into a sprint after them.

"Rose! Where are you going? Get back here!" Alberta shouted after me but I didn't hear her following me so I knew she was still fighting.

I could handle one Strigoi, I was prepared now. With my stake gripped tightly in hand I raced after them. Letting just one of them escape put lives at risk; we were too close to where I used to work.

What if someone I knew was next?

The Strigoi gave me quite the run, they were fast and able to more easily jump the fences while I had to climb them. We moved further away from where the others were but I knew my way around well enough to be able to get back. Whatever reaction my body was having to them, I was able to sense which way she was going, the nausea getting stronger the closer I got.

The apartment buildings had thinned; the streets truly deserted once we were in the warehouse district. I always avoided this area.

Something always felt wrong here.

The Strigoi jumped another fence and I picked up my pace to get a good momentum in my jump, almost reaching the top with my hands. With a heave I pulled myself up the rest of the way and then jumped over, landing on the ground in a crouch.

They were gone.

Fuck.

It looked like the back lot of one of the buildings, junk piled up sporadically. I cursed the lack of light. The sky was dark, with no moon to help light the area.

I was seriously regretting my choices.

My hand went to my ear, ready to give directions for them to follow, but came up empty. My earpiece was missing. Patting down the waistband of my jeans, I discovered I was also missing my radio.

Definitely fucked.

Not only were they going to kill me for running off alone, but I had also lost equipment and my only source of communication.

I held my stake up, ready to strike at anything. The nausea was still there but I couldn't tell where they were hiding. I should just jump back over the fence but I didn't want to risk turning my back on them.

Something on the edge of my mind was pulling at me, some sense reacting to the area. My body wanted to walk further into the lot. An almost desperate need to cross to the far building. I eyed it, it looked no different than the rest, abandoned and vandalised. And yet, there was something about it.

"Rose…"

I blinked, shaking my head. What was that?

"...Rose…"

The voice felt inviting, and my stance relaxed as my stake lowered to my side. I wouldn't need it here.

"Come closer, Rosemarie."

I took a step forward when a sudden scream sounded from the street. Like a bucket of cold water being thrown over me, I snapped from whatever trance I fell into. My body reacted instantly, not giving the voice another thought before I climbed back over the fence and ran in the direction of the scream.

My breath caught in my throat at the sight before me. I had thought this place was deserted. I thought I could prevent someone else from being hurt. I thought I would be able to protect people.

The Strigoi I had chased had a woman in her clutches, she was trying to break free but it was useless as her blood was drained from her.

Rage burned in me as I rushed forward, knocking the Strigoi off-balance and pulling the woman free. There was so much blood. The Strigoi only smiled at me, not even trying to fight me.

The woman on the ground made a terrible gargle, choking on her own blood.

Again the Strigoi turned and ran from me, but this time I didn't follow.

I dropped to my knees before the woman, hands covering the tear in her throat. The skin was ripped and jagged, so much blood flowing from the wound. It seeped through my fingers and onto the concrete at my knees.

"You'll be okay," I promised, desperately praying I wasn't lying. "You're going to be okay." I had no phone or radio, so I did the only thing I could—I screamed. "Help! Somebody help! Please!"

I stared down at the stake in my hand. It seemed like such an insignificant tool, and yet it could be used to kill monsters that attack innocents at night.

At least, it's meant to.

Though maybe it isn't the tool's fault, but the one that was wielding it.

I couldn't ignore the fact that the silver was so clean and yet the skin of my hands was coated red. It had dried, the stain a sign of how I failed.

"Rose."

I didn't bother looking up at the man speaking to me. I didn't feel like craning my neck to see the disappointment in his eyes, and I sure as fuck didn't want to be lectured. It was probably some zen lesson crap he found in a fortune cookie, storing it away for when the new guardians fuck up. Telling me to walk it off while being ashamed that he was the one to train me.

It wasn't Dimitri's fault, he taught me how to do everything right. Gave me all the lessons in the stupid gym that I felt so ready to get out of—I was the reason that I got someone killed.

I could still hear her scream playing on repeat in my head.

My eyes squeezed shut, shaking my head as if that would rid me of the images. Blood pooled on the ground around her from the tear of her throat.

I'd never seen so much blood before.

"Rose, look at me."

I kept my head low, "What's the point?" My question was loaded, the question applied to so much.

Dimitri breathed slowly through his nose. I could picture him running his fingers through his hair. My own was a tangled mess, having come loose during my chase; I wanted to pull it back but didn't want to drag the blood through it.

"It wasn't your fault."

I made a noise, sounding like a strangled laugh. "Try telling her that." He didn't see the look she gave me, the hard, icy look as I watched her bleed to death.

"What we do—this isn't an easy thing to do, mistakes happen."

"What we do," I repeated. Finally lifting my head to lock eyes with him, "What is it that we do, exactly?"

He seemed confused, his mind going through the possible answers. "What do you mean?"

"When you gave me this stake. What did you say that we do?" I asked him firmly.

His lips pressed into a thin line, "Rose, it isn't–"

"Help them. That's what you said." My eyes dropped to the weapon in my hand, "You gave this to me and said that we help those that can't defend themselves from the monsters that haunt the night. Only we can help them."

"You did your best."

With a yell, I threw the stake away from me, watching it bounce on the pavement. "I didn't do shit!" I lept to my feet, marching up to Dimitri until our chests were almost touching. "I didn't help anyone, I got her killed. And for what? Because I thought I was good enough?" I laughed, the sound was dark. "Well, lesson learned. I'm not good enough and I never will be."

I spun on my heel, taking three steps before his hand wrapped around my arm, pulling me back around to face him. "You made a mistake, everyone does, but we don't let it stop us from trying again. You can't just give up."

I slapped his hand away. "Watch me, comrade. I never should have been here in the first place." With a hard glare, I turned away, zipping up my jacket and shoving my hands into the pocket in hopes of hiding the blood.

"Where are you going!"

I didn't look back. Muttering my response to myself as I walked into the night, "Somewhere I won't hurt anyone else."

I wasn't sure how long I was out walking the streets. It was nearing sunrise when I left Dimitri. The morning light didn't give me any hope for the day—only shedding light on my failure.

My jeans and jacket were dark-coloured, hiding the blood stains, but it wouldn't be enough to conceal it forever. All I needed was one person to look at me hard enough and they would call the cops on me. I didn't need any more run-ins with them.

Hunching my shoulders and letting my hair fall forward to cover my face, I kept my eyes down on the pavement and tried to figure out what I was going to do next.

I considered my apartment but quickly decided against it. I didn't have the keys to get in and if anyone was looking for me, that would be the first place they would look. I couldn't just show up at the diner, too many people there would ask questions.

I didn't know where to go but I didn't want to be alone.

With that thought in mind, I went to the only person I could truly trust.

"Rose?" Riley peered at me with tired eyes, hair tossed up in a messy bun and a baggy t-shirt thrown over to cover herself. It was still early in the morning and considering her work schedule, early into her sleep. She eyed me, eyebrows raised when I didn't immediately respond. "Come on, I'll make some coffee," she offered, pushing the door open for me to enter.

I closed the door behind me with my foot. There was blood on my hands still, kept hidden by the pockets of my jacket. Riley strolled into her kitchen, hands rubbing the sleep from her eyes as she flicked on the coffee machine.

"You want to talk about it?" she quired. My lips quirked up slightly. Of course she knew there was something wrong. My lack of talking probably gave it away more than anything.

I focused on my shoes, pressing the toe of my boot into the tiles of the kitchen floor. Did I want to talk about it? How could I explain any of it without revealing the truth?

No one had specifically said so, but I doubt they wanted me telling humans their big secret.

Yet, when I looked back at her, my only friend who had stood by me for the last three years—the person who got me out of the homeless shelter and into housing and got me my first job—I didn't want to lie to her.

I released a shaky breath, pushing my hair back behind my ear without thinking. I jumped at the sound of a cup smashing, and then Riley was by my side and took my hand in her.

"Fuck! Rose, what happened?" she asked, turning my hand over, frantic eyes looking for injuries. She gripped my other hand and pulled it out of my pocket, inhaling sharply at the sight. "Whose blood is that? Is it yours?"

I couldn't look at her, my eyes refused to leave my hands. Riley dropped my hands and began to search me for injuries, pulling my hair back from my neck and cursing under her breath. I didn't know what she had found until I felt her fingers brush against a painful spot on my neck, and then I remembered the Strigoi had dug their nails in.

I tried to pull away but Riley was having none of it, gripping my arm and dragging me to her bathroom. She stripped me of my jacket and then filled her sink with water. I watched silently as she cleaned my hands and then moved to my neck.

"Jesus, Rose. You're covered in blood," she exclaimed, examining my jeans and shirt in the harsh bathroom light.

I couldn't hide it in here.

I was led to the bathroom tub and made to sit on the rim. Riley stood over me in a way that made me think of a disapproving parent. "Tell me what the fuck is going on. First, you disappear for two weeks and manage to find some family and now you show up covered in blood that isn't yours." She dropped to her knees, clasping my cleaned hands, eyes imploring me, "Has your family got you into something bad? Did something happen between you guys?"

"Kind of," I admitted. Tears started to gather in my eyes, I hastily wiped them with the back of my hand. "Someone got hurt and it was my fault. I didn't save them," I sobbed; the fragile wall that had held my emotions at bay broke and the tears ran freely down my cheeks. "I was meant to save them."

Riley reached up and pulled me into her arms, hand rubbing up and down my back in a soothing motion. "Why were you meant to save them?" she asked hesitantly, confusion clear in her voice.

"I promised I would. I promised Dimitri, and I…I promised myself. I thought I could do something good." My hands clutched at the fabric of her shirt; head buried in the crook of her neck. Each breath I took in was ragged. It almost hurt as my chest constricted more and more.

Gently, she pulled me up to my feet and with her arms still around me, guided me out of the bathroom and to the couch. Shifting her hold on me, Riley sat silently and let me take the comfort I needed as I broke.

"Rose, I have to ask."

I blinked up at Riley, my eyes scratchy and tired from crying. It had been a while since I started, now just lying in silence against Riley's side. Her expression was drawn, troubled by her thoughts.

Her eyes flicked down to mine. "Are the police going to be looking for you?"

I had wondered that myself, but I knew Dimitri would have taken care of it. I didn't understand how everything worked yet, but something told me they covered up anything that could lead back to our world. I shook my head, "No."

Riley released a soft sigh, "Okay. Good."

Silence stretched between us.

"What have you gotten involved with?" she finally asked. Her voice was stern, reminding me of when she discovered I was going to join a group of other teens that planned to break into cars for money. I had been so desperate; I had only met her a handful of times by then, but she had already decided she was going to help me get out of the dark place I was in.

It was after that that I told her everything that happened to me, from my parents dying in a fire to me living on the streets and everything in between.

I wanted to tell her the truth again—the consequences be damned.

"That guy that I said was my cousin," I started, glancing at her only to make sure she was listening before focusing on the coffee table, "he isn't actually my cousin, but he does know something about my parents."

"So, this is about you finding them?"

I chewed on my bottom lip. "It started that way."