Day 12, yes I know it is now March, but mental health sucks, and just genuinely not been in the mood. I now have the added responsibility of being musical director for my uni's next musical, so thought I might revisit this for a break.

This has been sitting on my laptop for the last couple of weeks while I debate posting this. This is my first attempt at something a little smutty, I'm usually one of those who let the screen fade into black and leave it up to your imagination, kind of human. But let's see how this goes.

Smut

As always, let me know what you think.

Riv Riv :)

(See end of chapter for more notes)

K: Can I come over to yours tonight? And maybe stay the night? X
L: Of course, darling. Anytime you want. X

Kara felt safe at Lena's; the world couldn't touch her, no sound could get in, and no one could make her feel like she didn't belong. It was her home; Laoina was her home. She just wanted to be close to her lover, to have her hold her in her arms.

Lena was sitting on the sofa, book in hand, when she heard the knock; putting her book down, she smiled at the Kryptonian, waving her hand to command the door open. "Hey, Kara. How are you, a stór?" Lena reached out to Kara, stroking her arm gently and kissing her neck. The alien moaned in response, grabbing hold of Loaina's hand and pulling her towards her until their bodies were entangled. "Mmm, good, I'm guessing. The flowers are wonderful, sweetheart; go raibh maith leat." Lena pulled Kara to the sofa, guiding her to sit down, before going to the kitchen to grab some pot-stickers for Kara and put the flowers in water. "Ahh, you know me so well."

"Wizard of Oz or Lilo and Stitch?" Lena flicked on the film and placed her arm around Kara's shoulder, inviting her to lean in. Kara felt a scene of calm encase her, letting her guard down, allowing the wall to fall to the floor. Tears started gently weaving their way down the Kryptonian's cheek before splashing on the witch's hand. Laoina guided a faerie to catch the tears, silently gripping Kara tighter. She would speak if she needed, and Lena would just wait.

During the film, Kara's hands gradually made their way up Laoina's top, trying to find contact as a grounding source. Lena wasn't bothered by it; she knew the blonde wanted to get as close as possible. The witch turned the TV down, "Kara, mo ghrá, what's going on? Not that I don't mind your hand under my shirt; it feels nice." She knew where this was possibly leading; they hadn't had an entire conversation about what would happen the first time they slept together. Lena felt she might have to take the lead; she wanted to show Kara what it felt like to be loved and have control over her body. But a sad, teary Kara was not in the image. "Can we go to your bedroom? I just want to be with you, or at least try?" Laoina effortlessly rose from the sofa, switching the TV off and closing the curtains before taking the blonde's hand, leading her to the bedroom, and closing the door behind them.

Kara always liked Lena's room, soft colours melting into one, inviting people in. Different Celtic knot designs hidden in the features, she was sure all had a particular meaning to Laoina. Unlike what most people would suspect of one of the wealthiest women in the world, she didn't have a large four-post bed, but just a simple double bed in the middle of the back wall, covered in layers of fluffy and warming blankets. The lights were dimmed down low both in an attempt to create a loving ambience and not to overwhelm Kara. A gentle aroma of bluebell and hawthorn hit the Kryptonian's nostrils, relaxing her into her lover's embrace. So this was it, Kara was nervous, what if she didn't like it, what if Lena didn't stop, what if… There were millions of possibilities to come out of this, but right now, she just needed to feel close to Lena.

The witch gently eased Kara down on the bed, following suit, bringing her into her embrace, and placing a chased kiss on her lips. Slowly deepening the kiss, letting their bodies entangle with one another. To Kara, it felt like electricity, she couldn't remember when anyone had shown her that much love, and they were only one kiss in. Kara let her hands wander through Laoina's hair, effortlessly feeling the silky raven locks fall through the gaps in her fingers. Gradually her hands made their way down to the hem of Laoina's shirt, fiddling, eager to pull it up. When everything stopped, Lena pulled away, lovingly staring down, before sitting up and tugging Kara into her arms.

"Before you ask why I stopped, I just want to ensure you're ok? There is no pressure to reciprocate, mo chroí; I'm doing this because I love you, and you are beautiful. I'll be as gentle as I can, and if at any point you want to stop or wait, just say. And don't worry if you can't orgasm; I just want you to feel safe and enjoy it, so you'll have to talk to me. You have control of your body, remember? Tá mo chroí istigh ionat." Kara nodded, willing herself to get through this; she really wanted Laoina more than anything. She leaned in, cupping Lena's cheek, drawing her in for a kiss. Kara moaned at the sensation, something she had never done before; it almost made her feel insecure and guilty. "Mmmm, it's ok to like kissing and touching me, Kara. Voiehd nahn dhoia. I'm going to take your shirt off now, ok?" Once again, the Kryptonian agreed; they had seen each other naked before, and she could do this. Lena had seen her scars and not been disgusted by them; she treated them with care and love, softly running her fingers along the faded marks under Kara's bra, along her ribs. Laoina studied them closely before tenderly placing her lips against them, pouring every inch of love she could think of into Kara's skin.

"She khap?" Laoina delicately fiddled with Kara's bra fancaning, clipping it udon and throwing the discarded garment on the floor. Returning her attention to Kara's face, giving her a caressing kiss on the forehead and running her hands through her golden locks. "I'm going to turn the red sunlights on. If you want me to stop, just say. Try and relax for me, mo fhíorghrá; I've got you." Lena lifted Kara's head up before placing another pillow below and placing her love's head back softly. Letting her mouth explore the Kryptonian's body, lightly brushing Kara's nipple with her fingers as permission to take it in her mouth. A slight nod came from the blonde. Kara focused on the feeling, almost like soft feathers against her skin, trying to focus on Lena and not letting her mind wander. The slight pressure that Laoina used enough to connect through the red sun but not enough to send Kara back to Mol-el. It felt like she was flying on cloud nine, and nobody could reach her. Whenever Kara felt herself fall, even if it was the slightest, she noticed Lena slowed her movements, reaching for her hand to ground her. It was magic.

Laoina gradually got lower with her tongue, kissing every scar and freckle until she reached Kara's trousers' hem. "Féadfaidh liom?" Kara slowly nodded, letting her trust fall on Lena. She didn't want some things, like penetration, or Laoina to use her mouth. But Kara didn't want to spoil the moment, to knock the mood off of its course. Lena traced the top of Kara's pants before slowly pulling them down Kara's legs, giving the Kryptonian enough time to say stop if needed. "Truly beautiful, Kara. Tell me what you need, darling." Lena asked Kara; no one had ever done that before. She wasn't sure what she needed; she wasn't sure of anything other than she wanted Laoina.

"Lee, please don't go inside? I mean, you can if you want, I just don't want to disappoint you." Lena brought her attention up to Kara's face, which was red in a mix of embarrassment and worry. Laoina had never seen the alien look this vulnerable; the thought of disappointing her was an impossibility. Kara could never disappoint her. "Cara, a stór, ní fhéadfa díomá a chur orm." Lee travelled up Kara's body, kissing her skin with every word she said until their eyes met. "Does the idea of penetration scare you, leanbh?" A small nod, "Ok, then I won't, simple as that, Kara. What about oral, sweetheart?" Kara shook her head, making herself small. "Hey, don't hide from me, go hálainn. That's ok; we can work up to it if you want? Or we never have to do it." Laoina took Kara in her arms and held her close, before continuing, "I'm going to be really gentle and just touch your outer and inner labia. I will avoid your clitoris to start with; I don't want to overwhelm you; just make you feel loved. Do you know where those parts of your anatomy are, banphrionsa?"

Kara shook her head, anticipating what would happen next. But instead, Lena held her hand and guided it down her body, showing Kara exactly where she would touch her. "Is that ok, darling? If you want me to stop, slow down, or you want more, just ask?" Kara nodded, falling slowly into Lena's arms, watching her lover's hand glide gently down her body. "You ready, zhao?" A small nod came from the alien as she hitched her breath in what seemed like an eternity before Laoina's fingers made contact with her skin. Kara inhaled as the love surged through her body, as Lena's fingers caressed her. It was a new feeling like the world could throw a mountain at her, but nothing would ever hit them. Her toes curled as her grip tightened on Laoina, tears threatening to fall as the feeling of being wanted overflowing her senses. Laoina's loving gaze filled with admiration as she pulled back her hand to wipe the tears from Kara's eyes, placing a kiss on her forehead.

"That was beautiful. I love you. Are you ok, a ghrá?" Kara nodded, curling herself further into Lena before falling asleep in the bliss of unconditional love for the first time in her life.

"Invisible wounds are the hardest to heal, for their closure depends upon the love of others, on patience, understanding and the tender gift of time." Jennifer Worth

I hope that was ok, I have reread this like 20 odd times but there are still bound to be some mistakes. I was kind of going for the more emotional side rather than the actual physical actions, focusing on Kara. But to be quite honest just let my fingers type out what went through my brain. The quote at the end is just something that came to mind with this version of Lena and Kara, or just them in general if we are talking canon and their 'break up'. Oh and bluebells stood for constancy and everlasting love, and hawthorne relates to safety, typically being used to warn off bad spirits in Irish Celtic tradition. Anyway I'm going to stop rambling now because I'm nervous

As always Irish in this
A stór - darling
Go raibh maith leat - thank you
Mo ghrá - my love
Mo chroí - my heart, Irish term of endearment
Tá mo chroí istigh ionat - very romantic phrase literally translating to my heart is in you
Féadfaidh liom - may I
Cara, a stór, ní fhéadfa díomá a chur orm. - Kara you could never disappoint me
Leanbh - baby
go hálainn - beautiful
Banphrionsa - princess

Kryptonese
Voiehd nahn dhoia - this is beautiful
She khap - May I
zhao - love