Wawanakwa was a placid, unassuming island lake in the middle of Ontario. Famous for being the set of Total Drama Island, the time of the year had come for yet another round of wacky adventures and hammy teenage drama.
Or so everyone thought.
The boat arrived and the campers unloaded onto the docks. Alfred, Maria and Kiku followed them. "Who do you think we should stick around with?" asked Kiku.
"I'm all for Team Revenge," said Alfred. "Brick and Dawn are the trustiest people here, and I guess Anne Maria's a bonus".
"Okay, let's get chummy with them," said Maria. Alfred had already built rapport with Brick, while Maria regaled Anne Maria with talk about hair care. Kiku sat awkwardly next to Dawn, who asked him if he had not been held as a child.
"Chris will be joining you soon, maggots!" said Chef Hatchet as the fifteen contenders gathered around the campfire.
"Good," said Courtney. "There's a few questions I'd like to ask him as soon as possible!"
"She's onto us," whispered Alfred.
"That girl is all broth and no meat," said Maria. "She won't be a problem."
Soon, Chris McLean appeared to them in the flesh. The campers clapped half-heartedly, even those who had originally idolized the man had soon been disillusioned by the depravity hiding behind his filtered smile.
"Welcome, campers, to the long-awaited All Stars Two!"
"There's something off about him," said Maria to Alfred. "Like he's even more… evil than usual. And I watch this show religiously"
"As in like Tyra Banks use-the-campers'-trauma-for-television-drama evil?"
"No, he already does that, I'm saying E-V-I-L"
"You're not alone," said Dawn, butting into their conversation. "Chris' aura is more dissonant than usual"
"I believe her," said Kiku. "This young woman just told me all the problems I've had in my life"
"That's our Dawn!" beamed Brick proudly.
"We are only so lucky she chooses to use her power of digging and throwing shade for good," said Anne Maria.
"Alright!" said Chris. "Without further ado, here's our first challenge! I want you to BRING ME THE POLISAIADS, DEAD OR ALIVE!"
As if by some dark magic, all the campers, save Brick, Dawn and Anne Maria, turned towards them with evil, red eyes.
"Holy Starro implants, Batman!"
"Alfred, this is NOT the time!"
"What's, like, going on?!" said Anne Maria.
"We need to run!" said Dawn.
It was not easy losing the crowd, not with Harold throwing improvised shurikens at them and Ella summoning the forces of nature to attack them, like Snow White in that Shrek movie. Alfred gave them the background of their situation.
"So that's why your auras were so positively bizarre."
"But what are you three doing in Wawanakwa?" asked Brick.
"That," said a voice, "Is a question I'd like to ask, too"
Courtney stared at them with her normal eyes, but it was clear she wasn't exactly friendly, either.
"Courtney! How come you're not all zombified and evil like them?"
"Unlike you guys, I never let my guard down while I'm on this darned island. I noticed these microchips on our necks, like some kinda Suicide Squad plot device, and immediately removed mine. How come you three aren't affected? Too dense for mind control?"
"Microchips?" asked Anne Maria. "You mean these things?" She held up three short-circuited chips in her palm. "My hairspray must've fried their circuits."
"For once, I am thankful for your environmentally-hazardous aerosols, Anne Maria!" beamed Dawn.
"I know, girl. It's like I have the mind of a master… mind of a , whatever, you gets my gist!"
Maria cut in. "We need some sorta secret passage to the interns' area. We're looking for a certain girl intern, named Piper."
Courtney raised an eyebrow. "I happen to know one. We'll have to go through the mines"
"Ah, memories," said Brick.
"You mean THE mines…" said Alfred.
"Yeah, that. Let's hope Ezekiel isn't hungry…"