We Will Rise Again

Chapter 10 - Misery

Annie studied the same page in her rugged notebook once again for what seemed like the thousandth time that hour. She tapped her pencil rhythmically on the desk as she scanned the never-ending rows of numbers. After two hours of this, all the data on the page seemed to blend together, curling and contorting into a gray mess of scribbled lines.

With a long sigh, she leaned forward and rubbed her burning eyes, letting the pencil slip from her hand to the desk. Of all the mindless things she could be doing, it just had to be the one she hated. She was supposed to be at The Misery right now, working on the captive Cougars, but Faith had ordered her to stay away as there were rumblings of an impending resistance attack.

Annie scoffed.

The Misery had never been attacked. It was unheard of. One would have to be insane to launch an attack so close to the bunker. But then again, Faith was losing ground every day, and it was only a matter of time until their enemies made their way to the heart of the Henbane.

Annie rested her head in her palms. Things were changing every day, much faster than she ever expected.

Even Faith had changed.

She hardly smiled anymore. And when she did, it was some wooden facsimile. Now, with the resistance at their back door, she was completely different from the person who had taken her in all those years ago. Annie saw that clearly after Joseph left their bunker the other day after speaking with the Deputy.

The color had been drained from Faith's face and she walked around like she was in a minefield. After she lost the statue, a deep terror seemed to root itself in her heart and became worse with each passing day.

Annie sighed. Watching the person who had become her sister slowly fall had recently shifted her priorities. For the past few days, she tried being kinder to Faith, but after a full year of vying for her position, Annie could only imagine that Faith thought she was just being deceitful.

She sighed.

Across from her, in the corner by the door, lay a massive white wolf. The wolf stood and trotted to Annie's side, nuzzling her.

"Come on, Roxy. Not now," Annie mumbled into her palms as Roxy tugged on her clothes.

Roxy smelled of lavender, having been bathed repeatedly after being brought to the bunker. When she arrived, she was a stinking, disheveled mess that looked like she'd been prone to horrible conditions for many months. In all likelihood, she had.

Anyone who knew anything about Jacob's animal experiments knew that he went to extreme lengths to achieve results, regardless of the consequence. Roxy was a product of his obsession.

Annie attempted to plant herself in Jacob's good graces last she saw him, but he turned her away as if she were a nuisance, without so much as giving her a second glance. She bristled at the time, but soon realized that there were other ways to win his favor besides simply charming him. Unfortunately, the other way involved the data tables that lay before her, silently taunting her.

Resigned, Annie relented and drew her fingers from Roxy's brow to her ears. Her fur was still patchy and revealed rough skin, but it no longer felt like Annie was running her fingers through a steel wire brush. She became mesmerized by the simple act of stroking Roxy's white fur, and her budding stress began to mist away.

Initially, Annie was dismissive of Roxy's presence, but after spending day after day cooped up with the beast in a single room, she began to see the appeal of having Roxy around. More than that, she saw why Faith had taken her in the first place.

Roxy's body was asthenic after suffering countless invasive procedures and experiments. A few weeks ago, she looked no more intimidating than a house cat with a bad attitude. But because of Faith and Annie's care, she had begun to gather her strength again.

"You're a good girl," Annie cooed as she scratched under Roxy's chin.

Moments later, the door creaked open, and Roxy's ears perked up like antennas as she swiveled to see who'd entered. Joseph shut the door behind him and cast a cursory glance at the clock before settling his attention on Annie. He took a step forward as the corners of his mouth turned up.

"She's doing well?" he asked, gesturing to Roxy.

Annie had frozen momentarily. To see Joseph stroll in so leisurely wasn't on the list of things Annie expected to see today. And without an armed guard, no less. She quickly wiped any trace of surprise from her face and matched his smile.

"She is."

Joseph nodded and took a few steps toward Annie and Roxy before settling down on one knee. He reached his hands out to Roxy and said, "Come."

Roxy stood on all fours and walked to Joseph's outstretched arms. Her gait was more measured than usual, and she tilted her head as though the man before her was suspect. Still, she stopped before him and let him pet her.

"Faith told me about this one the other day," Joseph said as he examined the wolf with his hands. "I was surprised. Jacob has been hounding her for years about taking a few of his Judges, but she never would. I wonder what changed."

Although Annie nodded and smiled as Joseph talked, she still couldn't shake the odd feeling that his presence commanded. Not only was he alone, but he was going off on some unrelated tangent like he was talking by the water cooler. There was no sense of urgency in his voice, no fettered emotion brimming under the surface. Nothing. He was as calm and collected as she'd always known him to be.

"You know," Annie began, swiveling in her chair and thumbing her nails. "Faith isn't here right now. She's at the Veterans Center again with Jacob."

For a few seconds, Joseph hardly paid her any mind as though he'd not heard her, but Annie could see the cogs turning in his mind as his brows knit together. She'd been a fool to think that Joseph had come to her without purpose.

"I know," he said. He stood up and smoothed the wrinkles out of his neatly pressed clothes, a slight twinkle in his eyes. "I didn't come here to speak with her."

He paused.

"I came to speak with you."

Annie clenched her jaw. Long had she waited for a situation like this to arise. She'd thought of it and asked for it so many times. But with Joseph standing before her, she grew hesitant. In any other world, she'd be over the moon, but now her heart was in her throat and she was gripped with guilt.

"Me?" She nearly stumbled over the word.

Joseph's expression softened into a warm smile. "Of course. Faith always praises you and your work, and I can see why."

He stepped towards the desk and lifted the notebook Annie was working on, a warm smile twisted the corners of his lips. "Even Jacob appreciates and values your work, though he'd never admit it."

She found that hard to believe. As Faith had told her, Jacob expected accuracy. Doing what he considered to be the bare minimum would never impress him. But all the same, Joseph's silky tone came close to convincing her otherwise.

"Thank you, Father," Annie said.

"Here. Come with me." Joseph gestured for her to follow him.

Annie followed Joseph out of the stuffy room and into a cramped, dimly lit hallway that spidered off into different branching pathways. A thin sheet of Bliss licked at Annie's legs as Joseph, walking leisurely with his hands behind his back, led her to their destination.

Their path ended in a large chamber, lined with vast, stretching pipes that lined the walls like veins and connected to tanks and pumps of Bliss. The machines churned and growled as they shook and vibrated in place. Annie could feel the tremor of the machines beneath her feet as it surged through her body and made her teeth clatter. Joseph led her further into the chamber, past the myriad of engineers and technicians that kept the machines running. Many of them took the time to withdraw from their work to address Joseph, who responded in kind.

Joseph stopped in front of the largest machine and craned his neck up to see the full scope of it. The thundering thing was the nexus for all the pumps and tubes in the room. It exported the liquid Bliss out of the room and into different storage modules throughout the bunker. Without it, production would come to a grinding halt.

"I hear that you've become proficient in operating these machines," Joseph said. He tapped on a pressure dial as its needle held steady in the green.

Annie shrugged. "I know them well enough, but I wouldn't say I'm a professional. I'm not like Adrian or Luca."

This was her opportunity to talk herself up, to stretch the realities of her monotonous job. Yet she pulled her lips tight and stared forward, ignoring Joseph's inquisitive gaze. He likely wondered why the woman before him, always so quick to beam about her accomplishments, was about as responsive as a brick wall. She wondered as much herself, but the pit in her stomach held the answer.

Joseph was here for one reason, and one reason only. Faith was failing, just like the women who once held that namesake, long dead before her. Simultaneously, Faith's failings were the only reason Annie was cooped up in this insufferable box of a bunker. Were it any other day, Annie would be at The Misery, irrespective of an impending attack. There was nothing that Eden's Gate couldn't handle. But that had changed, and at the center of it all was Faith.

It was a quiet thing that slowly encased the minds of all who followed her. The doubts were everywhere. Joseph's presence alone told Annie that even he doubted Faith.

She bit her lip and found that she'd been clenching the guard rail in front of her.

"Annie. I know things have been hard recently, and I'm sorry for that." His honeyed voice stirred the cauldron of dread within her. "But if the worst should come to pass, I know you'll be ready. I have faith in you."

Those words left little to the imagination. Her mouth went dry as a dull throb pulsed at her temples. What she had waited for years was coming to pass very soon, but there was no more excitement because, at the center of it all, she would lose the only real friend she ever had. Annie turned to face Joseph, to say something, anything, but he was already gone.

Sheets of rain poured from the oily clouds and blended into the thick mist that wafted up from the ground, embracing The Misery.

Winston settled into his crouched position and shifted his weight once more. It wouldn't be long until the signal to attack was given. He heard the crunching of leaves under a set of boots before Joey appeared next to him.

"This is going to get messy." She spoke loudly enough to be heard over the rain.

Her words echoed the deep feeling of dread that had settled within him. The plan to attack The Misery was the farthest thing from ideal, and not only did Faith's people know it, but they also knew that the Cougars had no other choice if they wanted to reclaim the prisoners that were so instrumental to the resistance. Strategic minds, local leaders, and great fighters made up the prisoners taken to The Misery.

Winston hadn't considered the grave danger of such an operation when he pleaded for Whitehorse to let him go, but when he had volunteered to go scout the place again with a small team earlier that morning, he became acutely aware of the multiple ways he could be killed. Turrets that could mince him into fine pieces, an elite set of guards with heightened reflexes, angels that could, in greater numbers, overwhelm and clobber him. It was overwhelming, but he didn't have much choice in the matter.

If Faith were to be on-site at The Misery during the attack, he would need to be there to keep her alive. He knew the others would take it as an opportunity to cut the head off of the snake and cement an early victory in the region.

The weight of his armored vest and skills accrued over his time in Hope County were the only things keeping him in check.

"At least there's the mist," Winston said.

"It's awful convenient, but I'll take what I can get."

He nodded. Just an hour prior, when the Cougars were poised to attack, scouts to the east spotted a large, well-armed convoy leaving Faith's bunker. After hearing the report, Joey delayed the attack for fear of cultists breaking from the convoy and joining the guard at The Misery. Minutes after the convoy had disappeared, heavy plumes of Bliss began spilling from Faith's bunker and traveled down to the Misery, obscuring the soon-to-be battlefield and giving the attacking force a much-needed advantage.

In addition to covering the battlefield, the Bliss also created an ideal escape route over the Rock Bass Lake. Between the mist and the rain, the cult would have little chance of hitting a boat on the water like they would on a clear day. Winston looked further down the hill he was on and saw Connor nestled amongst a knot of rocks and tree stumps. He spoke hurriedly through his radio as he coordinated boats to be ready for extraction.

When he finished speaking, he turned to Winston and Joey. "They're ready when you are."

Joey nodded and spoke into her radio to confirm the other team's status. Team Two, headed by Grace, was to hang back around the hills and keep the perimeter as clear as possible. Grace answered back immediately, voice calm and even as always. Joey put Grace on standby and turned to Winston.

"You good?" she asked.

"Yeah." He nodded. "I'm good. Let's get this done."

When one of Jacob's officers handed Faith a radio, she already knew what awaited her on the other end of the line. It wasn't the officer's grim expression set deep beneath his beard, or his rigid, apprehensive stature as he approached her that signaled her. Rather, it was her actions that led her to where she stood.

"Yes, Annie?"

"The Misery was just attacked," Annie said. Her words were unpaced, and she was breathless.

Faith bit her lip. Since Winston had been spotted surveying The Misery, she knew an attack was inevitable. And as she expected, the Cougars got in and out quickly with the captives. Under different circumstances, Faith would be devastated after suffering such a loss. But she wasn't. She had put herself in such a position, after all.

When she realized that the Cougars would soon attack, she removed a substantial amount of Chosen from The Misery and delegated them to another facility, where she promised they'd be more useful. Additionally, she made sure that Bliss production would be doubled during the nights for the next few weeks so that a dense fog would cover not only her bunker but The Misery as well. Those two adjustments ensured that the Cougars would have an advantage if they were crazy enough to attack.

Of course, Winston would be crazy enough, she thought.

Faith couldn't say that she knew him personally, but she knew well enough that he was keen on throwing himself into terrible situations like it was a hobby. With that knowledge, she did everything she could to make sure he wouldn't get himself killed at The Misery. She wouldn't let him die before he submitted.

Returning to Annie, Faith bit the inside of her cheek. "What happened?"

"Those Cougars came in and just — God." Annie took a breath. "They're all gone, Faith. The prisoners, they took them all."

Faith heard rain falling through the radio's open line. It was synonymous with the rain that pelted the Veterans Center windows now.

"Are you there right now?" Faith asked, standing up from her seat and moving to look out the window. Her sudden movement drew a curious glance from the officer standing by the door.

"Yes, but—"

"You need to get out of there."

"No. The Cougars are all gone," Annie protested. "We wanted to send some people after them, but they went over the river and the fog was too thick to chase them. A few of the Chosen are going to try to see if they landed on the other side, but — Damn it."

Shouting and roaring engines blended in with the sound of heavy rainfall. Annie hastily barked an order to someone in the background before she returned her attention to the radio. "I think we may be able to find them, but it's going to be close."

"No. You need to call them off," Faith said.

"What?" Annie's voice rose. "But they can—"

"No, they can't. It's too much of a risk to send more people out there in these conditions."

Faith sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose as her cheeks flushed. Now more than ever she hoped she had made the right call.

"Call them off, or I will."

There was a pause for a moment, the ambiance still filled with raucous commotion, before Faith heard Annie give the order. Moments later, Annie returned to the radio. "Okay."

"Good. It wouldn't be smart to follow them now. How many did we lose?"

"Too many," Annie said. Her voice quivered and echoed as if she were currently walking through the interior of The Misery. "It's terrible. I'm not sure how many, but — A lot."

Faith felt a knot welling up in her stomach, and she felt her face flush. She knew her actions would cost the lives of those she was supposed to protect. The people that she walked past every day, that she smiled at and consoled, many of them were likely dead. All for the sake of that damned Deputy. And they never even knew what was coming. She ground her teeth together.

This time she had to be right. She needed to get to Winston soon. She already had an idea of how.

"Faith?" Annie had been calling out to her, but she hadn't noticed.

"Yes?"

"What are we going to do?" Annie sounded like a child.

That tone made Faith's blood boil. The stress of balancing her waning hold over the Henbane and trying to rein in Winston to satisfy Joseph was bad enough without Annie grousing about the state of the empire she would likely inherit. Was she simply not content with watching Faith fail anymore? Did she have to prod at her still?

Faith bit her tongue. "It's okay," she said. Her words, directed more to herself than Annie, were strained as they escaped her tongue. "I have a plan to cripple the Cougars, but I need to get a hold of Winston first."

"For Joseph?"

'For who else? What kind of a question is that? Of course, for Joseph! It's always for Joseph!' She wanted to shout at the top of her lungs. But she calmed herself and instead said, "Yes. Winston is important to him. You know this. I've told you why several times."

"Right," Annie mumbled as if she were in deep thought.

"And speaking of Winston, he was amongst those that attacked tonight, wasn't he?"

"According to the people left alive that could speak, he was," Annie said. Faith heard her breath hasten and her tone rose. "But Faith, I thought you said that Joseph spoke to him. You said he'd listen. If he doesn't, then..."

Faith knew what would happen. If she couldn't stop Winston in time, she'd end up just like John, dead and buried up in the mountains somewhere. Or more accurately, she'd end up like those that came before her: dumped in the acid baths of the Horned Serpent Cave.

Faith's cheeks grew hot as a pounding headache made itself known. "It's not that simple, Annie."

"But you said—"

"I know what I said!" Faith snapped.

The officer standing at the door hazarded a glance back to Faith before promptly averting his eyes and shifting uncomfortably in his spot. Faith shook her head and sat down on the nearby couch and laid the radio in her lap. She cradled her head in her hands as hot flashes thrashed her temples.

"I know what I said," she repeated with a muffled voice. "But I—"

She sighed. I just can't do it, that's what.

"Look, I'll talk to you when I get back. Just let them take care of it," Faith said.

Without waiting for Annie's reply, she

Just as the room seemed to spin around her, so did her world as it slipped further and farther from her grasp. It truly seemed like Annie would get her wish. She laughed into her hands, and her body shook as that laughter turned to bitter tears until she simply sat with her knees pulled up to her chest. The dim light from the lamp in the corner of the room irritated her puffy eyes, so she screwed them shut and welcomed the darkness.

Faith wished many times over that when she opened her eyes she'd be far away. Far from Hope County, far from Montana, far from everything. Never in her seven years in the project would she have thought she'd feel that way again. When she was born again into Eden's Gate, she believed that her darkest days had passed. That no matter what awaited her, it could never be as bad as what had come before. But she was wrong. Even before she became Faith, she'd never felt this degree of hopelessness.

She thought she had done the right thing when she altered the battlefield in the Cougar's favor. With the way her people acted, it seemed necessary to make those changes. They were loyal but trigger-happy, and they had shot to kill for lesser threats many times before. Winston couldn't be allowed to die, but many of her own had been slaughtered in his stead.

"Here." A gruff voice shook her from the dark.

Standing before her was Jacob, holding a steaming mug out to her. Framed by the pale lamplight, his expression was enigmatic. Faith took the mug and leaned back into the cushioned sofa as Jacob slouched on the opposite side, letting his body slack. He rubbed his face before his hand settled on his beard. They melted into a wordless moment while Faith traced the rim of the mug.

The nostalgic smell wafting up from the mug carried her back to a sense of frail serenity. It was a rare tea sourced from the Himalayas that Faith had watched her mother drink religiously for years until she herself had become hooked on it as well. Not long after mentioning it to Jacob in passing years prior, he always seemed to have some on hand long after Faith had stopped finding it herself.

"Trouble?" Jacob asked, breaking the silence and nudging the radio beside Faith.

"The Misery was just attacked," Faith said. To actually hear herself say it drove deeper the reality of the situation and her choices. She gripped the mug tighter.

"How bad is it?"

"Pretty bad."

Jacob leaned forward and clasped his hands. She could see him clenching his jaw and knew that he was fighting not to prod her further.

"I have a plan," she added. "If all else fails, I can take care of the Cougars and turn Winston."

"What's stopping you? Do you think he would afford you the same mercy you show him?" Jacob asked.

Faith bit the inside of her lip as her gaze turned to the floor. Would Winston really treat her with any sort of mercy? She had inadvertently saved his life, but would it matter to him at all?

Her mind drifted briefly to the first time she met him in the Bliss and she became sure that it would. He was different. Despite everything he's done and the position he's put her in, he was different. If Joseph had been right about anything, it was that. Faith knew that. But to explain it to Jacob would be impossible.

"Do you think that he would just wait around until you're ready to deal with him?" Jacob pushed himself to his feet and walked to the window. His reflection showed a scowl. "Ask John what happens when you do that."

"I'm not John."

"I know you're not, so why are you acting like him?" He turned to face her. "You have a way to stop him. You've had it from the very beginning. Why not use it?"

"He has to make his own choice."

"He's made it," Jacob said with venom bubbling beneath the surface. "Look at what he's done."

Faith knew Jacob was right. Logically, at least. But dealing with Winston came hand in hand with throwing logic out the window, and it wasn't as simple as Jacob made it out to be. At least not for her.

"Even if you're right," she said, wincing as another round of pain, sharp as jagged rocks, burned beneath her forehead, "it's what Joseph wants. And I'm not going to force Winston's hand if I don't have to."

Jacob turned back to the window again with a drawn-out sigh filled with resignation. "Don't worry about Joseph."

"That's easy for you to say," Faith bit back before she could stop herself.

Jacob snapped his attention to her with the speed of a snake, eyes severe. After a second, he turned away from her and sunk back into the sofa.

"I know," he said.

"You don't."

Her voice was bitter. Jacob never had to be afraid. She knew that. Her jaw tightened just thinking about what Joseph was capable of and what he made her do to get to where she was. Flashes of her predecessor's face pierced her mind. Faith remembered the horror in that woman's eyes as she fell, almost endlessly it seemed.

"You didn't have to kill her." Faith's voice trembled. "I mean, God, he made me… And for what?"

Faith sunk further into the couch. Her chest felt so heavy, like she was rooted in place. She bit her lip.

"I don't know if I can do this anymore."

The words had slipped out of her mouth just before she could catch herself. Immediately, her heart caught in her throat and a cold sweat beaded at the nape of her neck.

But Jacob didn't lash out. He just said again, "I know."

"What?" Faith asked.

Jacob looked at her. In his eyes brewed a storm teeming with thousands of things he must have been feeling or longing to talk about, but instead he clenched his fists and rose to his feet. The swift motion sent Faith sinking further back. Heavy footsteps took Jacob to the window, where he stood with his hands behind his back before letting them slip to his sides.

"You know, this all used to make sense," he said. "Now, I don't know."

Faith got to her feet and took the few tentative steps to stand beside Jacob. He trained his gaze away from her, staring far beyond the rain and the mountains. His breathing was shallow and measured, but she could still see his jaw gnashing.

"Then why are you still doing all of this?" She asked after a moment. It was a question she had wanted to ask for a long time.

"He saved my life, he's my brother, and I'm all he's got. All this stuff about him talking to God… It don't mean much to me. But when I look at him… I can still see that little kid, cryin' about what dad was gonna do to us. Like nothing's changed."

Jacob shrugged.

"It's just something I've got to do."

There was a distant resignation in his voice.

"But what about you? Why are you doing this?" He asked.

"I owe him everything," she said.

The answer was instantaneous and it rattled from her throat like the very shackles that kept her bound to Hope County. Joseph saved her life and took it as his own. She could never escape.

Jacob finally looked at her. "You don't owe him nothin'."

If anything in this strange fork of a conversation could have made Faith question the reality she was in, this would have to be it. For the man whose chief principles were loyalty and responsibility to outright say that she didn't owe Joseph anything was comparable to a slap in the face.

Her first instinct being to defend her position made it even worse.

Swallowing that instinct, she asked, "What are you talking about? Aren't you doing the same thing? He saved us both. That's why we're with him."

In the dim light, a small, pained smile rested on Jacob's face, as he countered her question with another.

"There's a difference, though, isn't there?"

There was a part of Faith that didn't want Jacob to continue. She knew he would anyway, but she also knew that there was something in her that did not want to hear what he had to say, even though she knew what it would be.

"I got to choose," he said.

Those were the only words Jacob needed to shatter her glass castle. And try as she might to put it back together again, Faith just couldn't because what he said was true. There was nothing she could say to counter that, and Jacob knew it.

Just then, before Jacob could say anything else, a soldier fitted in what Jacob considered 'recon gear' appeared at the doorway. Obviously, he'd been outside for a while, as he was still dripping with rainwater and had mud caked on his boots.

"Sir." He offered Jacob a crisp salute.

In the blink of an eye, Jacob seemed to snap back fifteen years. The lines in his face smoothed, his eyes sharpened, and his posture straightened.

"What is it?" he asked. Even his voice was stronger.

"We caught that lady you been looking for. Sarah Perkins. The doctor," the soldier reported. "She's en route to the mill for processing. We thought you'd want to know."

Faith remembered that name. The exact details were hazy, but she knew it had something to do with Jacob's incessant need to run tests on the local wildlife.

"Course I'd want to know." Jacob scoffed. "Get me a transport ready. I want to see her right away."

"Yessir," the soldier said. After another salute, he turned on his heel and receded down the hallway.

Jacob's demeanor softened again when he turned back to Faith. He placed his hands on her shoulders and opened his mouth, but words wouldn't come. It was like he was grappling with some deep irritation. Faith couldn't tell if it was directed towards her or just himself.

She got her answer when he let out a sigh and shook his head. "Just… Do what you have to do," he said, squeezing her shoulders. "Whatever that means for you."

Jacob gave her no time to process or respond to his words. He just turned and left.

"Now, tell me about Black." Faith heard as Jacob caught up to the soldier just as the front doors shut.

Faith took her eyes off of the vacant doorway and turned her attention back to the window. The storm had just begun to ease outside, but her mind already started brewing another. It was hard to shake off what Jacob said to her, even though his words mirrored her deepest thoughts.

Before Faith left for the Henbane, she made her mind up: She would try again. She just had to try one more time. Joseph wouldn't touch her if she could just do right. Faith knew that.

But what Jacob said:

'I got to choose.'

'Just do what you have to do. Whatever that means for you.'

Those words stayed with her for the whole ride back.