Howdy, guys? I hope you had a wonderful week so far, because mine has been a complete wack, but writing made it somewhat better. Hope you'll enjoy the new chapter and see you in a week!

Lots, lots, lots of love! :)

CHAPTER 9 - A fine exemplar of the species

Ivan's POV

Someone knocks at the door of the office. I asked not to be disturbed, but it may be something important.

"Enter."

When the door opens, it is Rose that comes inside. And from the way the air got icy in the room, I am guessing she is still not in a great mood. I swear that one of these days, after one of her fights with Dimitri, she will either kill him, or she'll try to kill me.

I decide to play it safe, adopt a friendly attitude, give her space to let it out, and I'll see how things unfold from there.

"Hi there, Rose."

She doesn't say anything back. Okay, so ignoring it is. I can do that too. She'll talk when she's ready.

She takes a seat on one of the armchairs and pins her eyes on me. As I said, I'll ignore it. I go back to my sketches. She puffs. So she doesn't like getting the same treatment, huh?

I don't say anything either when she pushes a vase off the table. She can smash everything in here if she pleases. I will not respond to it.

I feel her growing angrier and angrier. Still, I keep to my silence. I know she'll either take it up a notch or talk.

It seems like she chooses the talking part, but she tries to provoke me with her words.

"So, with all the women you fucked at the Court, you still needed daddy to arrange a marriage for you?"

"I suppose you're upset about something."

"How did you figure?"

"Are you mad at me?"

"Of course I'm mad at you!"

"Then I guess you're suggesting we could solve our problems with a visit to the bedroom, if you brought that up?"

"I beg your pardon?" Her back straightens in a split second and she gets defensive. "What would we be going to the bedroom for?"

I get up from my seat and head toward her.

"You know, there's that saying that the matters of the husbands usually get their solving in the bedroom."

"Doing what?"

"Come on. You know."

She blinks twice. "I don't."

"The thing?"

"What thing?"

I swear I'm doing my best not to smile. "Sex, Rose."

Her eyes widen and she looks down, embarrassed.

I finally chuckle as I take one step closer to her. I cannot believe it. Could it be?

"Rose, you never…"

"Please don't." She pulls back, making herself little in the armchair and I stop mid-step.

"Don't what?"

"Please, Ivan." She's breathing heavily and I understand how bad this looks from her point of view.

"Rose, no, no, no. I would never…"

I crouch in front of her, but not too close so that she'd feel trapped. She still has plenty of space to get up and leave if she wants to. Or to swing her leg and kick me in the face, if she feels like it.

"I would never force something like that on you. I promise that will never happen." Silence is the only thing I get from her. She watches her hands as she kneads them, still unsure. "Hey. Look at me, please."

"What?" She still looks down.

"May I hold your hand?"

"It was given to you, so I guess... you do what you want."

"I would like you to give it to me yourself one day."

"Ivan," she groans.

"Look." I reach for her hand and she lets me take it. "Getting married was not a decision we made. But it is our decision what we make of it."

"And what do you propose we make of it?"

"Let's be friends."

"Friends?"

"Yes. Just that. I don't know if we could become lovers, but let's at least start somewhere. We can be friends, can't we?"

"I… I haven't had a friend in a long time."

"Then, if you agree, I would be glad if you'd let me be that. If you'd let me be your friend. I won't be asking for anything more from you. I would never ask, if you don't want me to." I want to make that clear to her. The fear I saw earlier, I want to ease that up. I want her to feel safe around me.

"I'd… I'd like that"

"Good. And now, as my friend, tell me, what was bothering you earlier?" She shrugs. "Is it still Evette that is making your life hard?"

"She is. And that friend of yours is damned good at it too."

"Oh, so you're the reason he was off this morning? You two had a fight?" again?

"He didn't tell you about it already?" No, he didn't want to tell me why he was upset, but I will make sure I'll ask about it again. "It doesn't matter anymore. He was right, but…" she sighs. "I don't know, Ivan. I wish things were different."

"I wish that too. But we can still try to make the best out of it, can't we?" Seeing she won't be saying anything more about that subject, I change it. "I have something for you. Wait a second."

From the drawer of my bureau, I take out a box and sitting on the armchair next to her, I extend it to her.

She curves her lips in that displeased expression I'm now so familiar with.

"I told you these won't win me over."

"I know. I'm not trying to win you over anymore. We're friends, right? Friends don't win each other over. I just… open it, would you?"

"Fine."

She opens it and inside it's another box, the original box, which contains something from home – a nazar pendant, latched onto a golden necklace.

"I kind of talked to your father and he had some of your stuff and he sent it here. These came this morning and I know that I maybe shouldn't have looked." She squints her eyes at me. "I mean, I didn't look through them, I am not a creep, it's just that when your things came this box dropped and it seemed like it was something you held dearly and I thought-"

She smiles. "It's fine, I don't mind." She takes the necklace out and plays with the pendant across the tips of her fingers. "I really missed this. It was my mother's. You see, I didn't get to take it when-" she bites her lip, leaving that unfinished.

"When?"

"When my father drugged me and swooped me up to his house. You see, these things are from my place, not his-"

"Wait a second. He did what?"

"It doesn't matter. I don't even know why I told you that."

"The hell it doesn't!"

"Ivan." She shakes her head and I get it that the subject is over. Not that I will not dig into it one way or another. I get it that she was forced to come here, but to what extent did Yilmaz take it?

She gets sad, looking at the necklace again.

"Do you want me to help you put that on?"

"Oh, I never wore it. I was too afraid I'd break it or lose it."

"I think it would look nice on you. Maybe have a little piece of your mother with you."

"Maybe not now…"

"What would make you feel more at home here? Tell me. Honestly now."

"Wouldn't it be easier if I'd go home?"

"True. But it is not possible. Give me something to work with."

"I don't know, Ivan. I really don't."

"When you get an idea, you promise me you'll tell me?"

"Yes. Until then, can I see my other stuff?"

"Sure. I'll have them all taken to your room."

Well, not all of them. Some of those I have a little plan with.

Rose's POV

Later in the evening, I find myself obliged to go into Ivan's office again. But this time I don't knock. That would be way too civil from me, for what he has done to me. And to think we agreed to be friends!

I barge in there and yell at him straight away.

"This is outrageous! It's so embarrassing!"

He lifts his eyes at me, completely unbothered.

"What is?"

How dare he act so calm again?! I won't let myself be disarmed by it though. It worked a couple of times, but not again.

"Your friend decided I am not to be trusted with a blade? And you agreed? What do you think I am, five?"

"You should know we took into consideration that you like to climb trees as a hobby. Or throw yourself out the window."

I slap the desk that keeps us apart. "That is not the point!"

"And what is the point? The suggestions you kept on making about-"

"I asked for a blade and I fucking want it!"

"What for?"

"Personal matters." I sigh when he watches me, suspicious. "I am not going to kill anyone, alright? You're safe, Ivan."

"What about yourself?"

Dimitri. How come I didn't notice him in here? I turn my head and see him leaning against the wall, arms crossed.

I roll my eyes at him and at what he's implying.

"Come on! It's ridiculous!"

"You made a point earlier the day, and some other times too, and we have reasons to be concerned." So he eventually told Ivan about what happened today? Did he tell him everything?

"Fuck that. I could fucking stab myself at every meal. Why would I cut my veins in private when I can make a great show out of it at the dinner table? I'm the type to do that, right? Ekaterina says I am."

"That's a good point. Then you won't be trusted with any knife at any point. If you want any kind of blade, you need to be watched. At all times," Dimitri decides.

"You have to be fucking kidding me!" I get closer to him and lock my eyes with him. "This is the pettiest thing, Dimitri. If you wanted to get back at me for this morning, well, you did a great job!"

"He's not kidding, nor is he trying to take revenge on you. And I am supporting his point. For now, at least," Ivan comes to back him up, all to my detriment.

I am talking to the walls so if they're this delirious, I could match their energy, right?

"Fine! Then which one of you is going to watch?"

"Watch what?"

"How I am going to use that straight razor. In the bathroom. Naked. In all my glory!"

Ivan's eyes widen at my request.

"We um… why don't you use one of your lady things?"

"Lady things? Really? First off, I ran out of those things, but fine, let's say I use that. I could still kill myself with it, right? It's sharp, after all. Hence, I need supervising."

"We'll discuss this another time, okay?" if he thinks he can dismiss me with that, he's so wrong.

"No. I want that now. And it is happening now. I want my fucking razor and the fucker who would watch me while using it!"

The men look at each other and if they're having a conversation, it is telepathically, for I see reactions on both their faces, but I hear no words.

"We could let Lissa do it." Dimitri comes up with the idea.

It is a safe approach. But I am going to be petty and-

It's only that Ivan speaks before me and makes things so much worse than I planned to make them.

"She's not fast enough. Would you do it? You have the fastest reflexes around here."

Can you believe that my soon-to-be husband is doing this to me?! Fine! If he wants Dimitri to ogle at me while I'm shaving, then his wish will become true!

I try to keep my face as straight as possible, even though this is one of the most embarrassing things that has happened to me in my entire life.

"Great! I'm waiting for you in my personal bathroom in five minutes. We'll have so much fun!"

I wait for him in a robe, along with Lissa, and I am so close to giving up on it, but I'm too proud to do such a thing. I will go to the bitter end if I have to.

The second he enters the bathroom, I see he's mad about it.

"This is stupid." wow, that's the closest thing I heard from him close to a bad word.

"You asked for it, so now you have it."

"Let's be done with it."

I didn't plan to show myself naked to anyone, but if my dearest husband has this wish…

I get a hold of the knot of my robe, and want to take it off fast. Just like a Band-Aid, right? The shame will come and go. I guess.

But Dimitri turns his back on me just the second I opened the robe.

"Hey, you're supposed to see if I don't cut my throat."

"She can tell me. Lissa will watch you and she will tell me."

I thank god for his choice, but now that the prospect of feeling ashamed has been taken off the table, some seed of revenge grows in me.

I puff and take one step closer to him, making a point of invading his personal space. I know he feels me close.

"You're right, comrade. This is stupid. I hope you're happy about getting things your way."

I let the robe fall on the floor next to him and get inside the bathtub.

And that's how it goes, I shave as he is in the bathroom, his back turned to us, as Lissa is assisting us to give him a signal if I want to do something stupid.

"This is the most embarrassing thing I've ever done in my life," I announce to them before I wholly immerse myself in the water.

I don't stop there, though. I scold him the whole time we're at it, and I make sure I waste a lot of his time, just so that I show him that I can. And I will take my revenge on him further, he should be sure of it.

At breakfast the next morning, I find it proper to get a little bit more of my revenge.

A plate has been set in front of me for a while now, but I haven't moved a muscle. I keep on eyeing my guardian.

"Why aren't you eating?" He finally asks, seeing that I waited for him to do it.

"I'm waiting for someone to cut my food. I thought I wasn't allowed to touch sharp shit anymore. You don't want me to kill myself, don't you?"

Lissa comes from her place and wants to do it for me, but I stop her.

"Not you. The one who decided I shouldn't be allowed to do that should do it."

Oh, the way Dimitri eyes me. But he comes closer. He gets a hold of the knife and... and takes it with him.

"Your teeth work just fine. You can bite."

Oh, you motherfucker! He won this one, but I am not done with him. He's lucky that the edges of my fork aren't sharp enough to pierce through skin.

My further revenge plans keep on getting interrupted by Evette. She said I need intensive lessons and she is keeping me almost all day long locked up in a room, telling me about manners and the members of the Royal families and about tradition and respect and all that shit a monarch I am soon to become should know about. And it is so much to wrap my head around, that when I get out of there, the only things I can think about are food and my bed, not plotting revenge or escaping.

And there is one more thing I have to find energy for, which is non-negotiable.

On the day after my fight with Dimitri, I found a kitten in one of my early mornings walks alone, and I couldn't bear the thought that that little guy would get on the other side of the fence and get hunted down by the dogs. I don't know how the kitty even got in here, but I will surely make sure she never leaves. I mean, she's one of the few animals I met that doesn't want to hurt me! And she's so damned cute. How could I let go of that?

Keeping her hidden is another story, though. She doesn't meow too much, not even when I'm away all day long, and she doesn't try to break anything in my room either, despite being really playful, but she has a big appetite and I had to ask Lissa to sneak a lot of food in my room.

The only real inconvenience is that each time I open the door of my room, she tries to bolt out. She's a curious one, and it is getting increasingly harder to keep her confined inside my room. Hence, I've tried to avoid opening my door in the presence of anyone, and it has worked out fine. Until now.

Dimitri brought me to my room and he usually doesn't hang around. But today, for whatever reason, he asks me:

"What are you hiding in there?"

"What? What makes you say such a thing?"

"For the past week, you wait until I leave to get inside your room. You never did that before."

He is that attentive to everything I do?

"I um… I am not hiding anything. You're seeing stuff where there isn't any, comrade."

"Then let me convince myself."

"I am not letting you get inside my room."

"Then you have something to hide."

"Rather than my privacy? No." He doesn't believe me. "I'm not trying to escape, okay?"

Truth be told, I am starting to question my reasons for wanting to leave and I kind of told myself I could at least try to be a decent queen if it has been imposed on me. And for that, I need a lot of catching up, and leaving will not help me.

"You understand that considering your history, I find that hard to believe, don't you?"

I sigh. "Yeah." I wouldn't even believe myself.

"And you know that one way or another, I'm getting in there to see what you're hiding, don't you?"

I shrug, defeated. "It's not like I could stop you."

Still, he doesn't barge in. He lets me open the door for him and waits until I get inside before entering too.

To my luck, Millie is not out from under the bed, her absolute favorite place to hang out, and I get hopeful that she is asleep and that Dimitri will get out of here soon.

"See? There's nothing in here."

Of course, he doesn't believe me right away and looks around the room. Only if he'd do it faster! He turns his back to the bed and looks at the drawings I pinned on the wall.

"You made these?"

Fuck. If he wants to know more about those, I'll never get him out of here.

"Yeah, I did."

"They're beautiful." He thinks so?

"Thanks."

I can only thank god I thought twice before hanging one sketch of him on the wall. What would have he thought about that? It's not like I did it for any other reason than the fact that I find him to be a fine exemplar of the species. Because, hey, who would forget those features of his body?

And yes, I am referring to that one image of him in only a towel that I seem to recall far too often for it to be something healthy.

"That is…"

Fuck. He is eyeing the drawing I made of mum.

"That's Janine Hathaway." He looks at me, frowning, and I decide to tell him the truth. Part of it, anyway. "She's my aunt. My mother and she had the same father and… I met her a couple of times and I admired her. Her husband too. They were…" my voice will soon break if I say one more word.

"They were good people. I'm sorry you had to lose them like that too."

"You knew them?" They didn't mention any Belikov guy to me.

"No. But I heard they were good people. Great guardians." He smiles and takes one more look at the sketch I made. "You're truly talented, Rose."

When I hear a scratch on the carpet, I'm reminded why I shouldn't have been talking this much to him.

"Thank you, but now… you know… I'd like to go to sleep, if you're done searching for my escape master plan. Evette wore me out today."

He finally takes his eyes off the drawings.

"Sure. My bad."

He heads toward the door and when I thought I got off the hook, Millie meows.

He turns and looks at me.

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

"That sound."

"What sound?"

"Rose, don't play with me."

"I'm not. I um… I just… you know, stretched a little and I guess I made a silly sound."

"There is a cat in here."

I puff. "No, there's not. How did you come up with such a silly idea? I may have sounded like a cat to you. I do that sometimes."

"Where is it?"

"Under the bed," I sigh.

Kneeling next to the bed, he lifts the bedspread and Millie jumps on him, into the cutest attack I've ever seen.

Here is it, the end of Rose having a cat era. It was nice while it lasted.

He chuckles and after putting her on the bed, he starts petting her and I can already see she's in love with him. The way she nudges her head against his hand and how she's purring. That little traitor. I feed her every day, at the cost of my ass! She just met him!

I go sit on the bed and eye him, pretending to be mad.

"Why does she like you better than me?"

"Maybe I rolled in a field of catnip."

I smile. I cannot believe I'm jealous. But am I jealous of the cat, or him?

"What's her name?"

"I call her Millie."

"Interesting."

"It's short for Chamomile."

It clicks for him and he smiles. Yeah, I know, the cat is orange and the name was low-hanging fruit, but who cares?

He plays with her some more, tickling her and letting her bite on his finger.

"Lissa knows about this?"

"Yes. But-"

"And you didn't have the courage to tell me too?" He sounds rather disappointed about it.

"I didn't know if you'd… approve of it. I heard the Lord commenting about a stray cat once and he didn't seem to be liking cats that much. I thought you might… share his opinion."

"I'm not going to tell him."

"You're not?"

He shakes his head. "As long as you're careful with her. As long as you keep her in here and no one else sees her."

"You mean that?"

"Yes."

And I don't know where that came from, but I find myself hugging him. Of course, I realize how stupid my gesture was when he sits there, hands extended and his body tense. I pull away just as fast as I threw myself into it, looking down.

"I'm sorry. I didn't…"

He gets up to his feet, and when I look at him, he's expressionless.

"It's alright. Have a nice evening, Princess."

I haven't seen him exit a room that fast. Am I that unpleasant to him?

The infamous Christian Ozera, some Neil guy and some Dashkov guy, all Ivan's acquaintances, came by and joined us for lunch one day. Ivan's father thought it was a good idea that I'd be given another chance to meet some Royals, in a more controlled environment, along with my future husband. He didn't choose very important people, as I have already started on the wrong foot with some families, but I promised myself I will be good. I can pretend I like three guys for a couple of hours, I'm sure of it.

It all started nice, we were enjoying our food, but as I hear that Neil piece of shit comment about women's emancipation nowadays, how we think we're entitled to have something to say about everything, and how he is glad I don't speak unasked, it takes so much from me to not get up from my seat and put my fork into his eye. I bet that the news about me didn't get to his ears, but if he continues to talk like that, I might show him what women's emancipation can look like.

He goes as far as to say he's glad someone like me will be Queen because I am the embodiment of a good woman and I really would like to... But I promised myself I'll try to be good. Just for once. I can endure some sexist comments. I will have to hear them every day when I'll go to the Court until I manage to change something. So some practice wouldn't be bad, right?

I find it funny that I have to be the one to temper Ivan down. It seems like he didn't take those comments well either, but as the future King, if he still wants to get that position, he should, at least for now, be on the same side as this fucker. It's all about sharing the same values, baby, even if they suck.

When I see his hand fisting under the table, I cover it with my hand and hold onto it until he relaxes. He turns his head to look at me and I smile at him, trying to be reassuring. Maybe he's right. Maybe it could be us two in this, as friends.

But I am not hurrying anywhere with assumptions. After all, thanks to Lissa, I could understand how earlier he was promising his father he'll make sure this event will go well. That he'll keep an eye on me and he'll make sure to control me if I try anything. And with that, something gave me the ick about our situation. What if he's only trying to manipulate me with this friendship thing?

To Neil's own good, he didn't insist on that previous discussion and the conversation carried away pleasantly after his idiotic remarks.

After lunch, we go into the salon, where Lissa and I are supposed to show how nice and obedient women we are, and serve them tea and biscuits as they discuss things that are so important that our little female brains could never understand. I can endure this too, without wanting to contradict them every three minutes.

What I cannot stand by and allow to happen is when I go into the kitchen for some more biscuits and I find Lissa crying.

"Hey, what happened?"

She hurries to wipe her tears. "Nothing."

"Liss?"

"It's nothing, I promise."

"The hell it isn't." She's trembling all over.

"We should go back. They're waiting-"

I stop her when she wants to get past me.

"It was Neil, wasn't it?"

"Rose…" she looks up at me and her eyes fill with tears once more.

I don't need any other confirmation. I thought his piggish behavior would stop at him trying to whisper shit to her as she was serving him, but he just had to take it a little too far, as he excused himself to the bathroom earlier. Well, I am going to take it a little too far too.

"Did he touch you?"

"Please, Rose."

I know I'm pushing her, but I cannot stand by and do nothing about it.

"Did he just touch you or did he do something else?" Not that touching would be in any way acceptable, but I need to think of a punishment and I need to know all the facts. "Was it something more?"

"He just tried to… he groped me…" she starts crying once more.

"He's going to pay for this."

"No-"

Getting a hold of her hand, I take Lissa with me toward the salon, but she refuses to enter.

"Rose, please, I'll be alright."

"This will never be alright if you don't do something about it."

"I can't-"

"Well, I can." She opens her mouth, but I speak before she does. "And I will."

I get back to the little party and from the look in my eyes, Dimitri already knows there's something unholy on my mind, as he watches me approach him.

"Princess," hos voice sounds partly questioning, partly scolding, and I stop him before he tries to stop me. I pull him to one side and do what I promised I'd do.

"I have one question."

Lissa found the courage to enter the room too because she is now tugging on my elbow.

"Princess, please…"

"Shush. I'm dealing with this, don't worry. You don't deserve shit like that, you get me?" I turn back to Dimitri. "So. This Neil guy."

"Mister Szelsky?"

"Yeah, whatever." I haven't heard much about him when Evette was talking to me about his family. I wasn't paying too much attention, to be completely honest. "Who is he?" Dimitri sighs, knowing where I'm heading. "I promised I'd ask. I just need an answer." it all depends on his answer.

"Do you have a good reason?"

"A very good one." He takes a look at Lissa and I'm sure he saw her red eyes. He's not stupid not to figure out what happened.

"Are you prepared to deal with the consequences?"

"So ready."

"Rose, what's happening?" Ivan and the others get curious about our conversation.

"Just tell me, Dimitri."

"I don't recommend it."

"I didn't ask you that. All I want is that answer. Is he that important in his family? If I do what I'm about to do, will it be really bad?"

He seems to be having an internal fight, but at last, he sighs.

"Go ahead."