29
"And you … you asked him?"
"Yes."
Ianto knew Archie would have trouble with this given their own dicey past and had wanted to make sure he was one of the first to know. Archie's face told him it was the right thing to do. "You… OK?"
"Yes. I am. I have mellowed and… I am ready to settle down and just… let things happen" Ianto nodded "I am no Militarial now, not active duty and… I want to enjoy this one. I enjoyed Rhiannon but she was also palmed off to nursery school, other people… we both argued about that."
Archie nodded "Your first son."
"Yeah, conflicted about that but… also a little excited" Ianto rose from the chair, knowing this was Archie's way of telling him he didn't want to talk about the wedding "And on that note, I am going home for an afternoon cat nap. If you can believe that. I am getting old."
"Ianto… you? Never" Archie smiled "I just…"
"Archie. You and I were hard fast and heavy. We were never going to be long term, we both knew that. We were different people then. And if you are wondering and too scared to ask… uncle Archie will be part of Sprout's life." Ianto said with a wave of his hand to show he felt it was a non-event to even say it.
Well, the Blumanchu will be excited, a real party" Archie agreed to change the subject, visibly relaxing as they moved to more comfortable things to discuss.
The Judoon were still paying with the Muppet Slappers.
And Jack was just being plain mean.
.
.
Jack was looking at the food on offer, poking at it and rejecting it. Then he turned to find some Blumanchu behind him "Wot ya doin?"
"Looking for food ideas for the party" Jack replied. "the wedding feast."
"No, we do it!"
"The food?" Jack was surprised.
"We know his favorites, we do his food and you want it too"
Jack laughed "Oh… will I?"
"Yes" they all answered at once and he saw that he was surrounded, their glee evident.
With a shrug he admitted defeat.
.
.
"Well now… this is a problem" Ianto frowned as Head Fuckface simpered in his office, clutching the back of the chair for support like he might fall over form the horror of having to come to Ianto for help.
"We… we… we are sorry and… ah…."
"Ah." Ianto repeated, rising form his chair to show the baby bump which had dropped over the last few days. There was no mistaking it now. He took delight in the man's clear horror at seeing that as well. Ianto took a moment to revel and then, being Ianto, he started to feel sorry for the twerp "Look, I know you are sorry, but the fact of the matter is, it does not matter that you didn't know one of the mud monsters was me. No one should be treated that way. That being said… if you lot REALLY want back in my good graces, and that of the Captain who is riding your arses rather hard…. This is his child ya know.. maybe penance should be shown, not just whined about."
"What… what do you suggest sir?" came a weak whimper.
"The rubbish around here is disgusting. This whole settlement is disgusting. Who is doing that? You see my compound and who well the Blumanchu keep it… you lit need to do the same on your land! I want all the rubbish picked up, the roads clean and the grass freshly cut. I want the gardens around this building seen to. This is the public face of the Military, it should be clean and crisp like our uniforms. Also… the vehicles are all dusty. This planet is not very friendly and it does a shocking job on the paintwork. See to that, some hard graft and open sweating will please him more than simpering will. Blumanchu should not do your job for you!"
"and… and you Sir? What would make you happy"
"Blumanchu classes."
The man physically blanched as he gaped and Ianto started to laugh softly "I mean it. I want you to learn some basic phrases, to learn their culture and history… which will include mine if you attend long enough. You might even get some of the old ones to recant some of our glory days in battle. You know they live twice as long as a normal human, not as long as a Super soldier.. buy longer. Some here served with me in battle. You could learn about it, and in the process learn some humility as well as pride in this planet we now occupy."
"Yes Sir, as you say" the man nodded, turning to leave only to swing back "ah.. sir…"
"See my daughter outside, she and my future daughter-in-law will make sure you have the correct forms and… if you do all sign up and show some promise… I might even attend a class or two for the sharing of some memories too. After all, I saw a lot of battle up front and personal." Ianto waved a hand towards the door.
"Sir… is it true you saved the king?"
"Got the pin to prove it" Ianto muttered, settling back in the chair "yes… maybe that story if you all behave."
The man took off and Ianto wondered if he was doing the right thing, knowing deep down it was the only way to end this once and for all. Either they would assimilate and learn…. or he would have them reassigned off-world, like it or not.
Time to measure and trim the fat.