Chapter 3: Tracing out your shadows

Sasuke spotted her the moment he entered Ichiraku. She was sitting in a poorly lit corner with her head turned to Shikamaru. Her indigo hair looked black in the dim lighting and hid most of her face, including her distinctive eyes. She cut a completely unobtrusive figure and yet she was the first thing his eyes landed on.

Sasuke himself had tried to sneak in behind Naruto, the man of the hour. It worked for the most part.

Ichiraku had grown from a small side stall into a larger restaurant but even so it struggled to contain the horde of guests for Naruto's birthday party. It was a mix of ninja and civilians and, with his chakra suppressed, Sasuke managed to avoid scrutiny from all but a few of his former classmates. Most everyone's attention was turned to Naruto, crowding him to offer congratulations and birthday wishes.

Her attention was on Naruto too. Sasuke could see her face now, pale gentle eyes on the blond. She made no move to get up, however, content to watch from a distance.

Sasuke seriously contemplated joining her in the back. It was a tempting thought.

Instead, he took a spot to the side. Leaning against the wall with his one arm tucked under his cloak, he started counting down the minutes until he could leave without Naruto throwing a fit.

"Sasuke-kun!"

He sighed. "Sakura."

She was grinning up at him, green eyes filled with joy. Her bright pink hair had grown a bit and it was a wonder he hadn't seen her coming from a mile away.

"It's so good to see you! I know you've been busy, but it wouldn't kill you to visit," Sakura said.

Sasuke grunted. Talking to Sakura always left him with a bitter taste. She looked at him with so much hope and longing it made him almost sick with guilt. Sakura had been carrying a torch for him for so long, had wasted so many years wanting him, he didn't know how to begin paying that back.

Sasuke felt indebted to his genin team. Naruto and Kakashi didn't seem to want much from him other than making peace with Konoha, but Sakura…

"I think I'll leave now. I hate crowds."

"Are you serious, Sasuke-kun?" Sakura said, bristling. "You've been in Konoha for weeks and this is the first time I've seen you. You can't even give me a five minute conversation after everything?"

Sasuke held back a flinch at her accusing tone.

He tried to offer Sakura friendship, same as Naruto, but it was never enough. She would just continue to look at him with those desperate yearning eyes and he would feel like scum for not being able to muster any sentiment other than obligation.

"Maybe some other time," Sasuke said noncommittally. He could see her fists clenching at her sides and averted his gaze.

Naruto had escaped his admirers and was sitting in the back now. His side was barely touching the Hyuuga's but Sasuke's sharp eyes caught their hands clasped under the table.

"Sasuke-kun, can you at least look at me?" Sakura pressed.

"I'm leaving. Bye, Sakura."

Sasuke used shunshin to get to the roof of Ichiraku. He thought about going back to his apartment but wasn't tired enough to sleep. If we was going to meditate, he might as well do it somewhere outside the empty walls of his place. Besides, it was highly likely Naruto might drink too much and the least Sasuke could do was make sure he didn't end up passed out in a ditch on his eighteenth birthday.

The roof of Ichiraku didn't offer the best view of Konoha, but Sasuke glared out at what little of it he could see.

He hated being back here.

This village that had taken everything from him.

This village, the only remaining place in the world that had known his family beyond the illustrious clan.

This village that Itachi had slain for, had died for, that Sasuke was obligated to protect.

Walking through the streets of Konoha was like wading through a river of memories, both good and bad. Every step was haunted by the spirits of his ancestors and by the stares of the villagers. Curious and impertinent eyes tracked him everywhere he went, so different from the eyes that followed him when he was wandering the lands.

With his rinnegan hidden, Sasuke was just another dark haired shinobi or, if he masked his chakra, civilian. He still received a lot of unwanted attention for his looks, but at eighteen years old he'd long grown used to it.

But here in Konoha, he was instantly recognizable. The people here knew him, had known him since boyhood. He didn't know how to feel about that. It annoyed him, mostly. Other times it was comforting in a way that made him uncomfortable.

Sighing, Sasuke sat down, resting his lone arm on his knee, and settled down to wait.

He didn't know how much time had passed, but the movement of her chakra brought him out of his meditative state. Sasuke had been distantly aware of all the chakra signatures under Ichiraku's roof even while meditating, so he noticed when she stepped outside despite how quiet she was about it.

From his spot on the rooftop, Sasuke dug his elbow further into his knee and studied her.

Hyuuga Hinata.

Sasuke had a very good memory. Perhaps a by-product of his kekkei genkai, he could recall most things with crisp clarity.

The quiet girl on the street below had no real relationship with him. Sasuke remembered her doing her best to fade into the background in their childhood. A shrinking violet personality and hardly a standout at the academy.

And yet Sasuke found that she lingered in the periphery of his life, a conspicuous presence in the backdrop of his memories.

Hinata at clan meetings in a rainbow assortment of kimonos: salmon pink, cornflower blue, marigold, amethyst. Sasuke walking past the Hyuuga compound on his way to the neighbouring Uchiha district. Hinata being escorted down the streets of Konoha, Sasuke trailing his family in the opposite direction. Hinata on the swings alone, Sasuke passing by on his way to train with Itachi. Hinata seated at the back in the academy, Sasuke towards the front. Hinata hidden behind a crowd of cheering girls, Sasuke sparring in center stage. Hinata leaving for a mission at the front gates, Sasuke returning with Naruto, Sakura and Kakashi.

The thing about human memory that Sasuke had to grudgingly acknowledge, was that for something to be encoded in your mind you need to have been paying attention to it in the first place. Even for a memory as uncommonly good as his.

It was frankly baffling how aware he was of her.

Sasuke watched her tuck her hands into her sweater. It was chilly for early October. A gust of wind swayed her hair and Sasuke could see her shiver from where he was sitting.

Hinata looked up and seemed to frown at the moon before turning and looking straight at him. She tilted her head and then, after a moment, held her hand up in a timid wave.

Sasuke shunshined to stand in front of her. Hinata was short. He noticed it anew every time, maybe because of her habit of avoiding his gaze and leaving him to stare at the top of her head.

"Sasuke-san."

"Hinata-san," he returned.

Hinata stared at him in surprise and he saw the start of a blush high on her cheekbones.

"I didn't realize you'd come," she said. "I didn't see you in there."

Sasuke scoffed. "Were you looking for me?"

Hinata blinked up at him with wide eyes, mouth agape.

There was a tug of amusement in his chest at the sight. "I came with Naruto. You wouldn't have noticed anything else."

"Ah, well…" The blush bloomed.

He decided to take pity on her. "The idiot likes to make a dramatic entrance. He's the least sneaky ninja I know."

Hinata smiled at that and Sasuke found himself smirking.

They lapsed into silence. He took the opportunity to unabashedly stare at her as she took to staring a little beyond his ear in an illusion of eye contact.

"Hinata-san. Come see me tomorrow."

"Eh?" She startled enough to properly meet his eyes. "Sasuke-san —"

"Hinata-chan! There you are!" Naruto yelled.

Hinata's head whipped around to stare at the blond exiting the ramen shop. Sasuke's lingered before turning more sedately to Naruto.

"Ready to head home?" Naruto asked Hinata. He then grinned cheekily at Sasuke, "Betting you were ready to leave hours ago."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "I was ready to leave before we got here."

"We get it! You hate parties and having fun and being around people," Naruto laughed. "So thanks for coming anyway."

"Whatever."

Hinata was so caught up in looking at Naruto that she didn't notice when Sasuke left, gone as quickly as he had come. She unthinkingly glanced up at the rooftop of Ichiraku and was surprised to see the dark haired shinobi standing back up there.

She thought about waving or saying good bye, as unlikely as it was that he would hear her, but Naruto's hesitant hand on the small of her back distracted her. Hinata leaned into him a little.

Naruto could sometimes be surprisingly shy about public displays of affection beyond platonic gestures with their friends around. He'd blushed so sweetly when she held his hand under the table in Ichiraku. Hinata smiled at the thought.

The trip to Naruto's apartment was an easy one. Neither of them had drank more than a cup of sake.

Hinata was hanging up her sweater as Naruto locked his front door. As soon as she'd placed it on the hook, she felt his arms embracing her from behind.

"Hinata-chan," Naruto murmured into her ear lowly.

"Oh," she gasped quietly. Hinata let Naruto guide her into his bedroom where they spent the last hour of his birthday tangled together.

Sasuke launched himself from the top of Ichiraku Ramen and leapt from rooftop to rooftop.

Finally landing at the Naka Shrine, Sasuke let himself into the underground tunnels and, after a few turns, into a familiar chamber. He hadn't been here, in this particular room, in years. Not since his genin days.

Uchiha paraphernalia littered the area, with even more sealed in scrolls tightly rolled up and stored in large shelves that lined the walls.

After the incident, the Sandaime had arranged for the cleaning of the Uchiha district and the burial of the bodies. All the material possessions left behind, however, had been inherited by the sole survivor. Sasuke hadn't wanted anyone to get their hands on his family's things, but he could hardly leave them where they were, especially as Sasuke himself had moved into a small apartment near the academy.

This chamber under the ruins of the Naka Shrine held nearly the entirety of the Uchiha heirlooms. Standing here only magnified the nostalgia Sasuke had been feeling tenfold.

After some minutes of rummaging, Sasuke was finally able to locate what he had been looking for. After another cursory glance around the room, Sasuke's eyes caught on a finely painted porcelain tea set. Without another moment's thought, he took it into the crook of his arm and left.

Naruto was gone the next morning, leaving Hinata with the sheets tucked closely around her. Hinata had slept longer than usual, body pleasantly sore.

"Oh no!" She blushed furiously at the sight of the marks on her neck in Naruto's bathroom mirror. Fortunately, she kept Naruto supplied with her homemade healing ointments.

Making quick work of healing her neck, Hinata headed back to the Hyuuga compound to freshen up. Once done, she took some mizudashi ryokucha out from the fridge to serve to the Hyuuga clan members working tirelessly to build the compound's new housing units. They were sweating despite the cool autumn weather and gratefully accepted the cool drink. After chatting with them for a few minutes, Hinata recalled Sasuke's request.

She frowned to herself. Sasuke hadn't mentioned a meeting place and Hinata didn't know enough about him to guess where he spent his time. She certainly hadn't as a genin and felt she knew even less now for all that they'd spent more time in each other's company in the last couple weeks than in the seventeen preceding years.

Hinata activated her byakugan and focused. She located a powerful chakra source that was not Naruto closer than she expected and followed it, coming to an abrupt halt once she realized where she was.

Deactivating her byakugan, Hinata stared up at the Uchiha district entrance with trepidation.

Hinata bit her lip nervously, debating on going in. It felt almost sacrilegious.

She shook her head furiously. She would simply have to meet up with him later.

"Hinata-san. I should have known you'd need a formal invitation."

Hinata gasped. "Sasuke-san!"

Sasuke was standing at the entrance, staring at her sardonically with his one dark eye, the other hidden as usual.

Hinata bowed in greeting. "Sorry to disturb you."

Sasuke cocked his head, almost frowning. "I invited you," he said simply.

Averting her gaze to the ground, Hinata gave another shallow bow. "Then…thank you for having me."

Sasuke turned and began to walk into the Uchiha district. "Coming?" he called without looking at her.

"Oh!" Hinata hurried after him.

Following behind the Uchiha, Hinata couldn't help her wandering gaze. The empty streets and rows of dilapidated shops made for an eerie sight. More than that, she had the strangest feeling that she'd been here before. Paired with the knowledge of what had happened here, she felt herself getting dizzy.

Hinata was so preoccupied with her thoughts that she didn't realize Sasuke had stopped. "Sorry!" she cried, stepping away after bumping into his back.

She had started to reach up to touch her forehead reflexively when she felt a light touch ruffling her bangs.

Hinata stared up at Sasuke with eyes widened in surprise. He stared back, seeming almost as shocked as her.

Snatching his hand back, Sasuke huffed. "Lost in your memories?" he drawled as he began walking once more.

Hinata hesitated, tucking her hair behind her ear. "…Not exactly."

"We'd all be better off if we stayed in the present, instead of the past," Sasuke said. "But that's easier said than done."

Hinata glanced at Sasuke out of the corner of her eyes and realized that, though he was staring ahead blankly, he had deliberately slowed his pace so they were walking side by side.

"If it's too difficult to stay in the present…we can try to focus on our dreams for the future," she offered.

Sasuke scoffed. "Sounds like something the idiot would say." He continued to guide them through the desolate Uchiha district until they entered a house.

Hinata stopped at the door to take her sandals off out of habit even as Sasuke strode past her. He turned the corner and disappeared, leaving her alone in the entryway.

Walking in the direction Sasuke had taken, Hinata surveyed the house as she went. It was beautifully built but completely bare. No shoes or coats by the entrance, no paintings or photos on the walls, no books or trinkets on the shelves or tables.

Hinata paused in the doorway of what seemed to be the family room. Sasuke was standing motionlessly in the middle of the room. He was turned away from her, head bent low and overgrown hair hiding his face.

Despite his tall stature and broad shoulders, he looked incredibly small. Hinata clasped her hands together against her chest. She felt an urge to reach out but she held back, wary of encroaching on his personal space when they were essentially strangers. Familiar strangers, but strangers nonetheless.

Watching him from afar, Hinata was struck with the thought that Sasuke was changed, in some undeniable way, from the boy he had once been.

She struggled for concrete memories of Sasuke. He had usually been the center of attention, so much so that she hadn't been able to see him behind the crowds of admiring girls and envious boys.

Sasuke had been smart and capable, the top of their class. He'd won every spar and aced every test and was usually seen alone. These are facts she knew about Sasuke by overhearing the chatter of her classmates rather than by having witnessed these feats herself.

Hinata's broad impression of Sasuke before he left the village was of a boy with a façade of coldness fronting barely restrained anger. The brief glimpses she'd caught of him in his time away from Konoha was more of the same, with perhaps less restraint.

Looking at him now, he didn't seem angry anymore. And yet she wouldn't call its absence peaceful either.

A feeling of deep shame washed over Hinata. The private details of Sasuke's life had been made gossip fodder. Even after he left Konoha, the whispers didn't stop.

Unavoidably, Hinata was aware of the half-truths and conjecture spread around. It felt terribly wrong to have intimate knowledge, or assumptions, of Sasuke's pain without him choosing to share it with her.

Suddenly he turned his head to face her and caught her in the act. "It's rude to stare, Hinata-san."

Hinata startled and felt herself fluster. He had said her name again. She'd never heard him use honorifics with anyone else. There was something about the way he said it that felt like he was teasing her. "Ah — I didn't mean to…"

He huffed, the corner of his lip twitching into a small smirk. "Come on."

Sasuke led her into a dining room with an open archway leading into a kitchen. Hinata came to a stop in the center of the room even as Sasuke continued into the kitchen.

There was, inexplicably, a very beautiful porcelain tea set on the dining table, at complete odds with the otherwise unadorned house.

"Does Sasuke-san…live here?" Hinata wondered aloud. She brushed her fingers against her bottom lip in thought.

"Fuck no," Sasuke said from the kitchen. "I haven't lived here since I was six."

Hinata whirled around, loose hair swaying around her.

"Here," Sasuke said as he walked towards her. "Guess something got me thinking about the past."

Hinata blinked down at the stack of clean bento boxes easily balanced in his one arm. "Um…"

"It was good. I never got the chance to tell you that," Sasuke said simply.

Hinata looked up at him in confusion. His head was tilted down to look back at her and from this close his bangs did little to hide his rinnegan. It was hypnotic and Hinata lost herself for a moment before looking back down.

She had cooked him a bento just the other day, but in his hand he had six boxes made of the finest polished wood with classic Hyuuga engravings. Hinata reached out slowly, tracing her fingertips over the edge of one of the boxes.

"Oh!" The soft exclamation resonated loudly in the silent room.

It came to her slowly, the hazy memory of a brooding young boy. The other children at the academy speaking of the fate of his family in hushed voices. His pale, withdrawn face, dark rings shadowing his eyes. Hinata eating by herself as usual, gazing out the classroom window in search of a blond but accidentally spying another boy all alone. His empty hands curled into fists, no homemade lunch to hold onto.

"I'd forgotten…" she said, still tracing the wood with wonder. "Ko-san made me stop taking more than one bento when he saw me come back with one missing five days in a row."

"Probably thought you were being bullied. Which you were."

Hinata frowned, not wanting to think of the three boys that used to torment her whenever they caught her alone. She took the boxes from Sasuke hesitantly.

"Um…thanks?" It came out more as a question than a statement. Hinata felt Sasuke's continued stare but chose to keep her eyes on the bento boxes in her hands.

Sasuke scoffed. "Only eleven years late." He moved to lounge easily in one of the dining room chairs. "Do you remember coming here?" he asked.

Hinata could only blink at the abrupt change in topic. She shook her head slowly, head ducked down.

"Figures. Your family only came here a few times. Mostly we would go to the Hyuuga compound."

Hinata wondered what type of expression Sasuke could be wearing, but still didn't dare to look up.

"Do you remember it?" she asked boldly.

Sasuke was quiet for a moment. "I remember everything," he said eventually.

Feeling his intimidating gaze leave her, Hinata braved a glance from beneath the curtain of her bangs.

With his arm folded on the table, Sasuke was staring out the curtainless window. The afternoon sun illuminated his profile.

"You never wanted to play. I couldn't wait to run off, but you mostly stuck to your parents' side."

Hinata blushed. That sounded accurate.

Sasuke sighed. "You don't remember much from then, do you?"

Hinata shook her head gloomily. "No. Some things happened back then and…when I try to think of those times, it's blurry." She fiddled with her sleeves. "But I do remember some things, or at least I think I do," she offered. "It can be hard to tell the difference between a real memory and something someone told you about."

Sasuke didn't press, but Hinata could feel his curious eyes on her.

"I remember my father talking about…Itachi-san," she spoke haltingly, "That the Uchiha clan had a genius heir." She smiled ruefully. "It was already hard to measure up by normal standards."

Sasuke let out a mirthless laugh. "Tell me about it," he muttered.

"But I also remember…that he seemed kind." The more Hinata thought about it the more she could picture it. An older boy with an out of focus face, bigger and taller than her but with gentle hands that pet her head and held out wagashi. "He would pat me on the head," she recalled, "No one had ever done that before except my mother."

When she looked up, there was so much pain in Sasuke's eyes that Hinata was unable to look away.

Seeing her looking, his face shuttered, emotion giving way to impassiveness. "You can sit down, you know. Apologies for the lack of hospitality, there's no food or drink here," he said in his typical deadpan.

"Oh no, it's no problem!" Hinata was quick to say. "Thank you again for returning these." She smiled slightly. When Sasuke had invited her over, she hadn't known what to expect, but certainly not something so mundane as returning used bento boxes. But after the war, mundanity was a blessing.

"You don't need to thank me for something like that."

Hinata shrugged, still smiling. "I do have to get going, though. I promised Kurenai-sensei I would babysit."

"Goodbye then, Hinata-san." Sasuke turned towards the window again, which Hinata appreciated, always feeling more at ease when no one was looking at her.

"Thank you for having me," she said, bowing.

As she was walking home alone, still marveling at the stacked bento boxes in her arms, it occurred to Hinata that she'd always thought of herself as invisible, especially when she was younger. It was both a frustration and a boon. To be constantly overlooked in favour of people who were better and brighter had taken its toll on her self-esteem which in turn had made her appreciate her ability to fade into the background and hide away from judging eyes.

This made it more curious that Uchiha Sasuke had noticed the seemingly invisible Hyuuga Hinata.

Likely going to lean towards Hinata POV since that's sorely lacking in canon, but that doesn't mean Sasuke's not going to get his own development in this fic as well.

MVH