Okay. End of the fourth week!

Also, here's a note about my reference. When Stephanie talks about having a psychopath stalking her brother, yes, she is referencing Sideshow Bob, since she actually acts civil and even friendly towards him when he's not chasing Bart Simpson with the intent of ending his life. The musical I reference is Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street, so yeah, all rights go to Sondheim. This is a reference to Bob's voice actor, Kelsey Grammer, who has played the titular character onstage, just as I mention his character has.

Courtney didn't get any letters at the end of the week, just as she hadn't on the island. Surprisingly, though, I got a letter from Gwen.

Hey Steph,

I figured you knew about the Aftermath show, but not what was going on. Tomorrow night (I'm writing this after we got the live footage of the superhero episode), we have the third Aftermath show. Leshawna just got here.

Anyway, thing is, Geoff's been acting really sadistic recently. In the last Aftermath, he was willing to let me face pirahnas in the name of entertainment! Even Bridgette sent in fanmail with a question for me under a fake username about what she should do about it. Got any ideas? Bridgette's talked to him, but I'm not sure how much good that will do.

Good luck on the rest of the show! I'm rooting for you.

Gwen

I had another letter from Lisa, too. She'd just gotten the Stone Age movie episode.

Stephanie,

Wow, has a lot happened in the last week of episodes. First, the team switch. I know you wanted to be on the Gaffers, but I have to wonder...you liked your team, right? You, Beth and Lindsay were so friendly with each other – and I know how much you liked hanging out with Izzy. And so...were you going to make a move on Duncan while you still could? Like, when Courtney wasn't around? Which brings me to my second subject. (Just reminding you, my short-lived fling with Duncan was off-camera, so Lisa knew nothing about it – the only difference between him and any of my friends that she knew of is that I let him call me "Stephie").

Courtney's back? I agree with everyone else. That's so unfair! For once, I think Duncan's right – Courtney's really acting like a princess. Whining, getting special treatment, a PDA – look, I want you to have a PDA so we could actually talk! But you don't see me complaining about you not being allowed to talk to me.

By the way, nice job on the last few episodes. And I'm glad you let Leshawna out of that safe – that spa lie was unfair, but she didn't deserve to be locked up for it. Oh yes, and I am very glad that you guys finally took out Heather. She didn't deserve to win!

I'm actually really getting into the show now. This movie genre challenges are a lot more fun than those horrible summer camp ones. I like how creative you can be in some of them. Keep going! Remember, you're there to win!

Love, Lisa

I smiled to myself as I read that. My little sister was absolutely right about everything, as usual. Anyway, Courtney finally confronted me about the proposition I'd mentioned after the spy challenge.

"You ever gonna make that proposition, or what?" she demanded.

I managed a sweet smile and said "Oh, right. Yeah. Sorry, Courtney – it slipped my mind. Here it is: I was going to ask you to form an alliance with me. Not a giant all for one and one for all one – just, like, you help me out if it doesn't keep you from winning, I help you out if it doesn't keep me from winning, and we don't vote each other off. Lindsay and Beth were saying how they wanted to vote you off yesterday. How about it? You protect me, I protect you and no one else knows. I'll try to dissuade the girls from voting for you and you don't let the guys vote for me. And we could vote for the same person. Yeah?"

Courtney was thoughtful as she considered it. But after a minute, she smiled. "Deal." We shook hands on it.

The next day, I didn't arouse suspicion. While Courtney strategized, everyone else tried to make the biggest burritos except for Duncan, who would judge.

"Think I'd make a good reality show host?" he asked his ex-girlfriend.

"Excuse me? I'm strategizing."

"Ooh."

"If you'd strategize, maybe you could manage something more articulate." Courtney said sternly.

"Maybe you could blah blah blah-"

"Time's up, co-competitors!" Harold called out.

Beth and Lindsay had put their burritos together, kept close with one of Beth's friendship bracelets (I was still wearing mine). Harold's burrito was meant to look like Leshawna, while Justin's was supposed to be an appropriation of his arm muscle. As for mine...I'd purposely made it look like the red in the meat was blood, and stuck two pieces of pastry from the top to look like fangs. Yeah, a vampire. So call me cliché, at least my vampire looked like it wanted to suck human blood!

When Justin showed off his, he flexed with the burrito, and frowned when Beth and Lindsay looked blank. "Nothing? You feel nothing?"

"Not a tingle." Beth said.

"Not even an ingle." added Lindsay.

Justin started mourning losing his looks again, even though he was as hot as ever. Meanwhile, Duncan declared the winner. "Harold, your pathetic portrayal of puppy love makes me wanna hurl, but you did make the biggest burrito, so you win."

"This isn't right!" Justin whined. "I demand a second neutral opinion."

"Please." Courtney continued tapping away on her PDA. "I'm not coming anywhere near the infected." According to her, we had reality show-itis and if we weren't careful, we'd lose focus on the real competition by turning everything else into a reality show-esque challenge.

But Justin smiled and went to sit next to her anyway. "You know, you're the only one taking the game seriously. I just wish I knew how you did it all. It's so inspirational."

Courtney smiled back. "Just being me! I'm glad to help."

"You could help more if you'd tell me your secrets," Justin pressed, "Like, how do you even get through life with all your deformities?"

"My what?" Courtney stared at him. "I don't have any deformities!" That was true. Courtney was actually one of the prettiest contestants besides Lindsay. With her tan skin tone, dark eyes and hourglass figure, most of us only wished we had that kind of proportion. Even Heather.

"So your answer is...denial?" Justin took Courtney's narrowed eyes as a reply.

Chris and Chef came in, ready for the challenge, but when Beth saw the boot in Chris' hand, she immediately spoke up. "Ooh, that's a glass slipper! Which means today's challenge is a fairytale movie, my favourite!"

Chris glared at her. "Beth, dude, if you ever steal my intro again, I'll have to personally boot you off the show."

"You can't boot Beth!" Lindsay defended her. But then she smiled. "Oh wait, he can, cause it's a glass boot!"

According to Chris, everyone would be a knight except for one person. The girl whose foot fit the shoe got to be the princess – except that Chris was only letting the winners from last time try it, so Beth was out by default. Courtney won the second challenge, and Lindsay and I won the first, so we would all have the chance to be the princess.

Lindsay tried the shoe on first. "Are you sure that's the right one? It's tiny, like a kid's boot!"

"What can I say?" shrugged Chris. "Princesses are supposed to have dainty feet."

As it turned out, Lindsay had reason to be worried. Her cowgirl boots did her a lot of justice, because she released the biggest feet we'd ever seen. There was no way she could get that glass shoe on her foot.

I went next. I took off my Converse and slid my foot into that little glass boot. I had to scrunch my toes up a bit, but apart from that, it fit almost perfectly. We compared my foot to Courtney's to check that it wouldn't fit her better, and that was it. Courtney's foot was bigger, and if my foot was the smallest and I still had a slightly too-long foot...the shoe fit me best!

Chef came forward with a wand and fairy dust, which he threw into everyone else's faces. He tapped my head lightly with the wand. "I dub thee Princess Stephanie."

Courtney scowled, but didn't threaten her lawyers this time. She still had a chance to win invincibility by rescuing me.

While Chris began the challenge with everyone else, I was sent to the makeup trailer, where my princess costume was waiting. Ugh, after spending nearly five years in nothing but black, silver and red, putting on a poofy purple thing was torture. Yeah, I didn't mind the tiara so much, but still. I looked like something out of Disney. Like a mix of Rapunzel and Cinderella, with hair like Pocahontas (except not as perfect).

I didn't make a confessional, though. I wanted to see what happened before I had to get to my place in the story. Yeah, I had to learn a song, but I wanted to see what the six brave knights had to do. Once I knew, I'd go and learn it.

Basically, Chris was reading the "story" from a book, and they had to act it out. First, they had to cross a bridge with "disguises" that doubled as blindfolds, and get past Chef as the Terrible Toothless Troll.

Everyone protested, but Chris told them off. "Nowhere in this story does it say 'the cowardly knights complained'! Now get it together, and get crossing!"

I didn't stay to watch, since I had to practise the song. This was my chance to get spotted, possibly for Broadway, and I did not want to screw up.

Finally, I got to my place, and Chris narrated as I was lowered down to the stage with wires, saying that he gave the knights left (Lindsay and Beth were out, but all the guys and Courtney were still in) a vision of me, the princess.

The music began, and I sang the words I'd memorized. "When I was a little girl, I'd dream of my first kiss.

It would come from my perfect prince. And in my dream, it went like this!" I sighed dreamily.

"My prince will be tall and handsome, my prince will be tough as nails!" I sang. As I did, Justin flexed, and Duncan demonstrated how tough he was.

"My prince will have lots of money, my prince will tame wild whales!" I continued. Then I picked up the frog situated next to me.

"When we kiss, my prince will be you!" I sang, and then pecked the frog lightly and tried to smile through the disgust.

"Wasn't that song brilliant?" Chris said enthustiastically. "It was so brilliant, I know everyone wishes they could hear it over, and over, and over again, and now they can!" He held up a CD with my face on it, wearing the tiara. "Relive the magic of Stephanie, only $12.99! Call 555-SELLOUT to get your authentic Princess Stephanie CD before everyone else downloads it illegally!"

"I'll take one!" Harold offered. "I'm gonna listen to this beautiful love song and think of Leshawna."

"Do you really think it was good, Chris?" I couldn't help asking.

Chris glanced at the camera, then signalled to them to move it away and then replied impatiently "Yes, it was good and you know it. Now stop hogging the camera on my show."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, so you would totally still have this show if all the contestants were gone." But then I smiled. "I guess having an operatic psychopath chasing your younger brother has some benefits other than getting to know the weirdest of Springfield." (Yeah, I am talking about Krusty's ex-sidekick – he's a good singer. Thing is, I remember they did a prison musical last year and for some reason picked the one that allowed the prisoners to get their hands on razors, and he ended up playing the serial killer masquerading as someone at a hair salon).

I'd also noticed that Justin was getting all dreamy over Courtney.

"Hey, you! Sir Justin!" I snapped my fingers. "Wake up! Lady Courtney is a knight. I'm the princess – you're supposed to focus on rescuing me, not flirting with her." Not that I needed rescuing, but I was just teasing.

Courtney glared at me, and mouthed "I'm just toying with him. Once he's served his purpose in this challenge, I'm ditching him – don't argue."

I gave an apologetic nod and mouthed "Right, sorry. Lady Courtney." I added with a grin. She managed a quick smile back, before Chef came in on a horse and took me away to a set that appeared to be a tower, and I was reminded of that Rapunzel song Roxy sang in her dreams. How did it go again? "Let her hair down, sat all day and nobody came." Well, I could fight. And if I had to, I would. But I had four people fighting to rescue me.

Oh yeah, and slay the dragon/monster from the earlier challenge.

I had to act like crazy. "Godspeed, my dearest knights." I blew kisses to the guys. "Sir Harold...Sir Duncan...Sir Justin..." I hesitated, and then said "I wish you the best of luck, Lady Courtney. I wish all of you could rescue me – but the one who does will have my eternal gratitude."

I didn't pay attention to the fight with the dragon. Justin manipulated Harold into helping him help Courtney, who was manipulating Justin in turn. Duncan wasn't being manipulated, but Harold stopped him from getting to slay the dragon. Soon enough, Courtney had won. "I'm sorry, Justin." she said sweetly. "I just can't let a chance at invincibility go. You understand." She grinned up at me. "Princess Stephanie, I'll be up there soon!"

But when Courtney did eventually climb up, we weren't sure what to do next. We looked at each other and gave awkward laughs.

"Wait, wait!" called Chris. "There's no awkward laughter! It says here that Lady Courtney and Princess Stephanie must sword fight to determine the true winner." So the winner would get immunity.

I looked at Courtney warily, the memories of her wrestling match with Duncan flashing through my head. Sure, we had wooden swords, so we wouldn't kill each other, but what to do with them?

Courtney didn't waste time. She lunged and I wasn't quick enough to block. Soon, she had the upper hand, and for a girl who looked as preppy and was better at arguing than fighting most of the time, she was strong. Like, really strong. I could take either of my sisters and was evenly matched with my friends physically, but Bart could hold me down if we ever fought, and Courtney was definitely stronger than him. No matter how I struggled, I couldn't get free.

After ten minutes, I couldn't fight any more. "All right, all right!" I yelled. "I surrender."

"Courtney wins immunity!" Chris announced. "Again."

"Yes!" Courtney cheered, letting me up.

"Remember our deal?" I whispered to her. "Are we gonna vote together?"

She nodded, her dark eyes sparkling with exhilaration. "Justin." she whispered back. We were in agreement.

Not only did Chris start selling my song, but he also started selling dolls of me – not as Princess Stephanie though, just in my regular outfit I'd chosen for Total Drama. Yeah, I got none of the profits for it, but to be honest, I didn't care. At least people watching now knew I could act, and sing. Okay, so my princess song wasn't exactly Wicked, but, well...

Yeah. You know.

I was pretty relieved to receive my Gilded Chris award that night, after losing the sword fight. All the girls and Harold received them, too. And the last person to get one was...

"Justin!" Chris announced. "Duncan, you're out!"

"What?!" exclaimed Courtney. "This is an outrage! Justin should be going home!"

"Yeah, you're right." Chris said casually. "I was just kidding. Justin's actually the one who's been eliminated!" He tossed the last Gilded Chris to Duncan.

"An outrage, huh?" Duncan smirked at his ex.

Justin didn't get a proper goodbye. No one would really miss him. Courtney gave him a little wave, and Harold said something, but he got no admiration from the girls who had drooled over him previously. "All right, I'm going." he said. "But you'll regret it. With me gone, this show just became eighty percent less handsome." (I should add here that a later contestant said in a later season that I didn't compete in that his absence made the show "100% less beautiful"). But then, he accidentally bruised himself when he bumped into the Lame-o-sine. "Okay, seventy-nine!"

When I went back to the trailers that night, I pretended to be mad at Courtney. "I think you bruised me all over." I mock-scowled.

"Oh, get over it!" Courtney snapped, but I saw that she knew I didn't mean it. "Immunity, remember?" But then she came up to me and hissed into my ear "Come on, stop acting like you're friends with me! We don't want Beth and Lindsay to know about our alliance, remember? And we're not friends!"

I gave her a sad look and whispered back "Why can't we be friends? And I'm sorry, but do you honestly think Lindsay would cotton on?"

Yeah...that alliance doesn't really have harmony...or melody, come to that! Sorry for that horrible pun.