Author's Note: This side-story has the What-If 3 trilogy as a dream sequence. This was also an alternate take on the idea I had for this shot initially but the original take just wasn't working out too well so I put the kibosh on it and started over with this. I'm more satisfied with this one. Enjoy.
Louisiana
Bucky's mind was full. He had one of the most intense dreams he'd ever had in his life and for once, it had nothing to do with his past as the Winter Soldier. Instead, it had everything to do with...her. He walked through the trees around the house, knowing he was instinctively on his way to Phoenix's particular haunt. When he reached the place, he tilted his head when he saw she wasn't there. He headed deeper into the woods, looking for her. He was about twenty minutes into his search when he came upon her. Bucky ducked behind a tree and peered out. Phoenix was dancing. She was switching between forms at clearly predetermined intervals and Bucky wondered if this was some sort of cultural dance. The only thing he knew for sure was that she was a beautiful dancer. When in human form, she wore a flowing dress with a single shoulder strap. The cut and style of the dress suited the dance. Her shifting ability was something to behold since it influenced her clothing to suit her needs.
Bucky studied her moves, images of his dream becoming intrusive the longer he watched. Her dance was causing feelings and emotions to well in him. Even now in the waking world, he could still taste her and feel her body on his. The White Wolf felt a spiral coming on the longer he watched his inhuman friend dance to a tune only she could hear. He wondered if the dance required a partner and if so, was she imagining Seiryu with her? "It should be me," he thought, before shaking his head to stop that train of thought. Bucky had no right to her for many reasons. Aside from her pair-bond, Phoenix wasn't even human. He knew he was wishing for something impossible and after having everything stolen from him by HYDRA, Bucky had lost all hope for a normal life. He had been fighting for so long.
He continued to watch Phoenix dance and noticed how serene her face was. More intrusive thoughts started filtering in and the crisis he felt was growing stronger. Unable to watch anymore, the former Winter Soldier moved behind the tree he had been ducking behind and slid down against it. He buried his face in a hand and just let it go. He couldn't remember the last time he had been in this much pain over a girl. It was bad enough he was starting to idealize his inhuman friend but what he had said in the cabin last winter when he had his accident in the frozen river was true. He couldn't imagine a better girl than her to fall for. Phoenix had become his ideal woman despite not being one. Bucky felt rotten. On some level or another, he had started objectifying her false form and had been subconsciously replacing her true self with it in his mind.
The chimera in question sensed Bucky's presence long before he had found her. Phoenix kept her concentration on the various steps to the dance her mother had taught her. It was a solo dance Allianna had learned from her own mother, Queen Moonraine, who had choreographed it herself for her own coronation. Moonraine had taught it to her daughter in hopes of creating a new royal tradition. Allianna had no heirs but she taught it to Phoenix regardless. As far as the Queen was concerned, Phoenix was her daughter on the virtue of their shared blood. So after the two found each other after over a century, the first thing Allianna did to help build the bond was teach Phoenix the dance.
Since then, the chimera practiced it whenever she had a chance. In her mind's eye, Phoenix could see her beautiful mother dancing a pair dance with her best friend, advisor, and confidante, Tempest the Abhorred One. It was plain to her that Tempest had deep love and affection for the one unicorn who showed him unconditional kindness and acceptance. Much like herself, Tempest had his own struggles and a dislike for his own kind, all over his solid black coat and red garnet eyes. The Abhorred One didn't care much for Phoenix herself but he tolerated her presence because he cherished Allianna so much.
Bucky was a lot like Tempest. Jaded but not as jaded as the black stallion. Both had rough lives because of things out of their control. Bucky didn't ask to be made into the Winter Soldier while Tempest didn't ask to be born expressing the Abhorred Look, recently discovered to be a curse specific to his kind where a single unicorn would be born with those exact colors. How the curse was discovered coincided with Tempest's newly minted title across the Continent: Revenge Seeker. Thanatos paid for his deed with his life, but the magical output from Tempest was so powerful that it managed to disrupt and reveal the curse for what it was. Tempest hadn't been alone when he confronted Thanatos in the Forbidden Range. The High Kings were there, too, in the interest of seeing the Kelpie Race ended for good.
According to them, it seemed that Tempest had briefly transfigured when he atomized the demon. They didn't get a good look because the amount of magic he let loose was more powerful than even they imagined and they had to disperse it to the sky to prevent him from leveling the mountains around him. His love for Allianna and his hatred for Thanatos was that powerful and absolute. They did say it seemed that if the curse didn't express itself in Tempest, he would've been solid white. Something that hadn't been seen since the First Queen herself. Other white unicorns existed (case in point being Allianna herself) but never with a white mane or tail.
Phoenix's heart filled with love and compassion for Tempest. He was the best thing to happen to the Queen and she wished things were different for them. But the Unicorn Nation wasn't ready for an Abhorred One to be King. They would never accept him in such a role. They barely accepted him as Allianna's advisor. But still, he had been with her herd for almost 200 years by this point so they were used to him. Tempest and Allianna had managed to build a life that suited them. She offered him a home, kindness, and protection from their own kind. He gave her his love, devotion, and protection from all threats. They were as close as they could get to being a pair-bond.
Her mind turned to Bucky when she sensed his mood was plummeting. She knew this was inevitable but she didn't know what brought it on. Still, Phoenix concentrated and finished out the dance in human form. Her left arm outstretched to the sky, Phoenix held the pose and felt a tear roll down her cheek. Coming out of the pose, she wiped her face and sighed. The tragedy of Allianna and Tempest was near to her heart. If it hadn't been for Thanatos, perhaps they could've defied the Nation and perhaps her mother could've had a chance to carry on her bloodline. But as things stood, the two unicorns were separated by station and National superstition surrounding the Abhorreds like Tempest. Allianna was also connected to a chimera as her only foal. Her bloodline was finished.
Phoenix looked towards the tree where she sensed Bucky. She headed over to see what was up, shifting back as she went. She peered her horned head around the trunk and noticed her human friend was in the middle of an emotional breakdown. She wasn't sure why but she wasn't about to push for answers. That was up to him. Instead, she walked forward a bit and lowered herself to the ground, folding her legs under her. She kept silent, lowering her head to the grass and closing her eyes. She heard Bucky go quiet for a moment and figured he had noticed her appearance. The silence was broken not long after. Phoenix's ear flicked a bit when she felt some weight come to rest across her back. She stayed still, eyes closed, and smiled gently.
Bucky hadn't expected Phoenix to find him but the idea was frankly silly. She had always come when he needed her most. He was startled to be sure when she appeared and watched as she lay down like an oversized dog. His emotions got the best of him and he had an internal fight with himself about if he wanted her around or not. In the end, the side of him who wanted her there won out and he moved off the tree to drape himself across her back. The contact had an effect on his mood and he started to calm down a bit. Phoenix had been a rock for him for a long time. She had become a safe space, even though his troubling thoughts were all about her. Bucky knew he had to tell Phoenix what was on his mind. She wouldn't push for information but she would pick up on the atmosphere he'd carry around if he didn't come clean. Thing was, Bucky was terrified. Phoenix had said that if the line between her true and false forms was blurring, she'd bounce from his life and never come back. Bucky didn't want to lose her.
Leaning his cheek against Phoenix's ice blue scale, the White Wolf started an internal argument with himself. But in the end, his rational side won out and he had to come clean. He had already lost everything. What was one more thing? "Nix?" he spoke in a quiet voice. The chimera's ears flicked back towards him. She didn't respond but she was listening. Bucky started talking about the dream he had and the floodgates just opened from there. He explained the dream in its entirety and eventually, it transitioned into how it made him feel. Phoenix kept her head down the entire time and her even breathing was counteracting his rising panic that he had just ruined everything.
Phoenix felt Bucky's hand fist on her cropped mane as if it were a lifeline. She remained calm, listening and thinking about what she was learning. She only raised her head when she heard a thud next to her and saw that Bucky had fallen to his side, holding his head. He was losing his grip a little, which sparked concern in her. "Hey, hey, it's okay," she said, soothingly as she brought her head to rest on him. "No, it's not. Truth is...I think the line is starting to blur," Bucky said in a quiet voice. Phoenix lifted her head to look at him. "Okay, let's talk through this. I want to help you," she said. Bucky looked up at her, his soulful eyes having shades of fear and sadness in them. "Let's get the dream out of the way. From what I heard, it was a very sweet dream despite the fact that I came to you homeless and robbed of my magic," she began.
Phoenix went through every talking point she felt needed addressing. This included even the spicy aspects, which she pointed out, wasn't overly sexual from what she understood. Bucky's face was red as he sat up again. "So what about this dream makes you think the line is blurring?" Phoenix finished off. Bucky looked down at his hands. He bit his lower lip before running a hand through his hair. "I...I want that, Nix. What the dream showed. I want that," he responded. "And you want that from me?" came the next inquiry. "Yes," he replied. Phoenix hummed and silence fell between them. On the one hand, Bucky was admitting to wanting more from her, something Sam had been worried about. But on the other, she understood where he was coming from.
Shifting into human form, Phoenix took Bucky's hands in her own. He looked at her surprised. "What are you afraid of?" she asked, soothingly running her thumb across his flesh hand. "I'm afraid of him. And I'm afraid this whole thing will make you leave," he responded, gripping her hands. Phoenix knew he was referring to Seiryu. Aside from being a dragon, he was a High King and World Master. Those titles made it clear that he was someone with a lot of power as well as having someone of even greater power behind him. Bucky always had this underlying fear of Seiryu and maintained their friendship with that in mind. The only time he crossed the line he conjured for himself was in the cabin. Phoenix had wholeheartedly allowed it because she didn't have the same frame of mind as humans. As for the dream and his changing feelings, well, she didn't think things were bad enough to warrant her leaving him.
"I think we're okay, Bucky," she said. She met his eyes and smiled. "But I…" Bucky said before she placed a finger to his lips. "We're going to be okay. The line isn't blurring that much. After all, you still recognize me as a chimera. And if I can be honest with you, I'm actually quite flattered you dreamed about me. The details don't really matter much to me, only that you were able to live the life you deserve in it. It breaks my heart still knowing you're only in this century because of me. I know you don't blame me but that doesn't completely assuage the guilt. I'm also sorry that you're now carrying a torch for a woman who doesn't truly exist. But I know you and I know you're not blinded by it. I think that as long as you know where we stand with each other, I won't just ditch you. It's going to take more than a dream and wishful thinking for me to throw in the towel," she assured him. Her finger dropped from his mouth and Bucky swallowed, his eyes dropping to the level of her lips. Phoenix tilted her head, a small smile on her face.
"I'm willing," she said, knowing what he wanted at that moment. Bucky's eyes shot back up to hers. "Wouldn't he have a problem with this if he found out?" he asked. Phoenix took his hands again. "He knows what we did last winter. It's not that easy to keep secrets from someone as ancient as him nor would I ever be inclined to. And even though you won't believe it, he's not that bothered. For one thing, I'm not a dragon. I'm not bound by his kind's culture. Neither is he, in fact, because his status as a World Master supersedes everything else. Do you think I'm the only one he's ever loved? Not by a long shot. There was another, long before me. There could be others I don't know about. In the end, it doesn't matter. He'll be there long after I'm gone. He's always told me he cares only for my happiness and if I decide to move on, he would step aside," she explained.
Learning Seiryu knew everything made Bucky feel very hot under the collar and guilt started gnawing at his gut. But if what Phoenix said was true, it didn't seem like he cared one iota. After all, he probably had the power to prevent Phoenix from seeing Bucky again. She was an independent soul but being mostly unicorn meant she was bound to the herd mentality. In that case, Seiryu was her herd leader and she wouldn't go against him. "I find it hard to believe that he would, though," he said after a moment. "An ordinary dragon wouldn't. They mate for life, much like penguins. Once a pair-bond is established, only death breaks it. Seiryu, however, cannot live his life in accordance with his culture entirely. His duty is to serve the Weaver as His emissary to the East. He's still very much a dragon in his instincts and ways of thinking but he's been around so long, they don't run as powerfully as they do in the rest of his kind. He's going to lose me one way or another. Those are just facts," she responded.
Bucky looked down as he leaned back against the tree, weighing everything he learned in his mind. Phoenix wouldn't lie to him and if Seiryu really had an issue with her spending so much time in this dimension, he would've said something to her. Phoenix wasn't the type to go behind someone's back either. She had practically given Bucky an open invitation to express his feelings physically if he was inclined. No strings, guilt-free, with complete permission. Seiryu's position meant he couldn't interfere at all because what purpose would that serve? He was doomed to outlive everyone he ever knew and loved except his peers. "I don't want to ruin what we have, Nix," he finally said, deflating.
"That's fair. Allow me to assure you that from here on out, the call is entirely yours. If you need me to do anything for you, whether it's as simple as taking your hand or a kiss, I will gladly do so. In return, you need to let this idea that you're moving in on someone's girl go. That, in itself, is a problem and could jeopardize our bond. I have only one boundary and it's a boundary even your dream self recognized," Phoenix said, making him look at her confused. Smiling and looking down at herself, Phoenix set a hand where her womb was. "I can't engage with you in that manner. I'm sterile and I lack all the necessary hormones that dictate breeding cycles. That's just the nature of my creation. So as long as you're mindful of that and don't start pushing for it, then we're good. Understand?" she asked. Bucky set a hand on her face and made her look at him. "I don't think that will ever be a problem, Nix. I can pretend you're a human all I want but the reality of what you are will always be there in the back of my mind," he assured her.
Phoenix smiled gently and he leaned back against the tree. "I have a lot to think about and digest, Nix. But before we go back to normal...can we…" he trailed off. The shifter smiled before leaning forward on her hands and knees. She kissed him completely of her own volition. Bucky's heart was racing and breaking at the same time. The fact she didn't reject him over a dream and the fact they could never be together was both freeing and soul-crushing. It was a hard pill to swallow but they both had said what needed to be said. No matter how much Bucky wished things were different between them, he knew beyond the shadow of a doubt what they had already was more than enough. He could be content in that and their friendship mattered more to him than anything else.
Phoenix felt something wet drop to her face. When she went to pull back to see what was wrong, she felt Bucky's arms wrap around her as he deepened the kiss. He pulled her into his body and held her tightly. Phoenix mentally shrugged it off for the moment and let him take the lead from there. She could tell he was hurting again. Part of her was hurting as well. But they were both strong. They would come out okay. Bucky was just mourning what he couldn't have and everything he had lost. She mourned on his behalf. She would probably keep it to herself but if things had been different, she could see herself being with him. She had never met anyone who had life experiences similar to her own. Not even her own kind could say as much and many of them had suffered just as much. Phoenix always felt isolated from them because she wasn't just created by an alchemist. Allianna had given natural birth to her. No other chimera she had met could say the same.
Phoenix felt Bucky pull back and they broke the kiss. She looked at him, unsurprised to see he was crying a bit. The White Wolf's sad eyes met hers while his hands gripped her waist. He broke eye contact and lowered his head, his fingers closing on her dress. The shifter said nothing and rested her cheek to his hair. No words needed to be said. Bucky was validated in his feelings for her and how things had to be. The shifter knew it would take a little time before things were normal again between them but that was to be expected. Her open invitation would always stand if he ever needed something from her. Theirs was an unconventional love but it was what helped their bond withstand a lot.
After a bit, Bucky pulled away and rubbed his eyes. "You okay now?" Phoenix asked. "Better," he responded before looking at her. She had sat back on her knees and was looking at him with a contented face. "Can you do me another favor?" he asked, with a sad sigh. "What do you need?" she replied. "Can you...stay in your true form for the time being? This…," he said, motioning at her body. "Hurts too much right now," he finished. Phoenix hummed in understanding. She got to her feet and stepped back a couple of paces. A few seconds later and a large horned equine stood before him.
"Thanks. And I'm sorry," Bucky said. "Don't be. You're human and in my experience, humans are more emotional creatures than they care to admit. You haven't put me on the spot about anything. Everything I do, I do to help you. Just tell me if things become too much. I can certainly leave this world for a little bit and come back later if you think we need time apart," she responded. Bucky reached out and she lowered her head. He took hold of her curled horns and she pulled him to his feet. "You really don't mind carrying the burden I just handed to you?" he asked. "I don't mind. As I've said a long time ago, yours is a light burden compared to everything I've ever lived through and suffered. And it doesn't compare to the inevitability of my own passing and how it will shatter Seiryu's heart," she assured him.
Bucky stroked her face with a small smile. "Thank you for everything, Nix. I adore you for that," he said. Phoenix just nickered in response before she started heading back to her usual haunt near Sam's house. Bucky watched for a moment before following. He asked her about the dance she had been performing when he found her and she explained its origins as a dance her grandmother had created. The heavy atmosphere that had settled over them started to dissipate as some semblance of normalcy returned to their dynamic. Friendships had stumbling blocks here and there. How friendships survive such blocks depended on the strength of the bond between those in question. Bucky was going to be carrying a torch for the part of Phoenix that was human for a little while but sharing his feelings with her meant he wasn't carrying it alone as he feared. In time, things would burn to embers. The two companions would look back on this and know they had made the right decision to keep things the way they were.