It had been several weeks now since Phoenix had been a guest in Sarah's house. Her back was healing slowly but it was healing well. The wound itself was as wide as the space between her shoulder blades down her entire back. It wasn't likely to shrink in width or length. It took her some time to get used to being stuck in a human form and she found some comfort on sunny days when her shadow was seen. Sarah was worried, though. Phoenix hadn't spoken a single word since the day Bucky left and she seemed to have clammed up even further when Sam admitted he was the one who suggested that Bucky leave. They couldn't gauge her emotional response to the news. Phoenix's expressions shifted between melancholy, depression, and general sadness. The day Sam left to get back to New York, he had goodbye and apologized for everything. Phoenix merely gave his arm a squeeze as a way of saying he wasn't at fault at all.

On this nice warm day, Phoenix was alone at the house. Sarah was working and the boys were in school. She was strong enough and healed enough to sit outside near the small dock. She wore a very loose shirt and one of Sam's dress shirts over it. She was mindlessly twirling her ring with her thumb, her mind replaying that day over and over again as it had every moment she was awake. Her tears were long dried out. She felt empty now, save intense self-loathing. She knew she had screwed up big time and the reminder of that screw-up now permanently adorned her back. It had been caused by magic and thus would never fully heal through magic. Healing magic could heal surface-level wounds without a trace but larger and deeper wounds took a while. And this was without the involvement of magic. Magical wounds regardless of size or depth were permanent. This was too deep, even without magic's involvement.

The scar, she could live with. However, she was convinced Bucky had washed his hands of her for what she had done and she didn't blame him. He deserved better than a screw-up chimera who fell so far into her human side, it destroyed everything. She may have been locked into human form but she was too miserable to go stir-crazy about it. She also developed an utter hatred of John Walker. He was the catalyst to all of this blowing up in her face. It takes a lot to make an animal hate a human, even when they weren't on the same level of sapience. It went hand-in-hand with her self-loathing because while Walker started things, Phoenix was ultimately the one who finished them. She hated herself even more for that.

Phoenix looked at the ring and took it off to hold it up. The ring was the symbol of their pair-bond…and she single-handedly broke it. It was all her fault. She ruined everything and was abandoned by the one she loved most in the world after hurting him so badly. Irrational anger took control and Phoenix stood up. Before she could think, she threw the ring into the river. The moment it hit the water, she snapped out of the haze and her face paled. Her voice, severely underused, only came out as a strangled cry. She was about to enter the river to try to find the ring when an alligator popped its head up out of the water. Phoenix was startled and fell on her rear, jarring her still-healing back, and causing her to cry in pain. She then glared at the alligator which only returned it with the impassive expression its kind was known for.

"I figured it was about time I knocked some sense into you," he said in his tongue. Phoenix gave a quizzical look. "Look, you. I don't know what you are but I've been watching you for ages ever since you first showed yourself at this place. I don't know what sort of bond you have with humans, but from where I'm standing, it's a deep one. Especially with the human with the strange arm. It's plain to me that you're hurting. That's fair. You're allowed to hurt. My question to you is are you willing to listen to this old alligator's words?" he asked. Of all the weird things that had happened to her, this was up there as one of the strangest. Getting advice from an alligator. She looked out towards where she had seen the ring hit the water.

"Don't worry about that object you tossed. The river here doesn't flow fast. Just listen and I'll fetch it for you. I'll keep this short," the gator assured her. The shifter took a deep breath but her anxiety over the ring didn't ease. "So…I have no idea what you did and since you don't seem to be talking right now, I'll just give my opinion and fetch your object. Far as I'm concerned, whatever you did to make the human male mad at you, ask yourself this. Are you sorry? Don't answer this. Tell him instead. Your next step should be tracking him down to tell him. You don't actually know if all is lost unless you try to make amends somehow. Hope is not lost if you don't let it. The best advice I can give is to take pride in whatever you're supposed to be, face your fears, and let be what will be. From what I can tell, you don't have anything left to lose," he then explained.

In some parts of All World, crocodilians were symbols of wisdom. Seemed the same held true for Earth crocodilians. Phoenix still felt the weight of her actions and looked down. The alligator then swam off and dove into the water. The shifter mulled over what she was asked to think about. He had a point that hope wasn't lost as long as she didn't know what Bucky's thoughts were now. But as it stood, she wasn't sure they would survive this. For the moment, she was worried about the ring. Every second the alligator didn't reappear seemed to stretch centuries. She heard something off to the side and looked over. The alligator had returned and was crawling onto the bank. He approached her and slowly opened his jaws. Sitting on his tongue was the ring. Phoenix felt immense relief but she had to be careful. The alligator had given some sage advice but at the end of the day, he was still a predator and probably wouldn't resist taking a bite out of her.

Phoenix slowly extended her hand, pausing here and there to make sure the alligator wasn't suckering her in to turn on her. Her hand reached into his mouth and she took hold of the ring. She pulled it out as fast she could but the alligator didn't snap his jaws shut. Instead, he slowly closed them as if he just got done basking. "You are very wise. You knew better than to act rashly because I found your object. Goes to show you've been around a while since you clearly understand my kind. Now think about what I said and the rest should fall in place," the reptile said before heading back into the water and floating off. Phoenix watched him go before looking at the ring. The relief she had gotten it back made tears well up and she started to cry, closing her fingers around it and holding it to her chest.

Meanwhile in NYC

Bucky was sitting in the dark. The last several weeks had been swinging between feeling like hell and like a vacuum. He hadn't shaved in that time so he had a full beard going on now. His hair was also growing out a bit. But despite how miserable he was, he still had the energy needed to shower and do other daily tasks. So it wasn't like he was neglecting himself entirely. He just didn't care enough to shave or go for a hair trim. It was both a good thing and a bad thing, depending on the day, that he had supersoldier serum in his veins because it was the only reason he hadn't been drinking himself stupid. Things did get easier, however. Being away from Phoenix and jumping the first hurdle of managing how betrayed he felt, Bucky was eventually able to rationalize things to a point. He was now more baffled than upset that Phoenix would go to such extreme lengths.

He felt the air shift and he looked towards the window. A small dragon spirit popped into existence and Bucky sighed. "You came," he said, simply. Seiryu floated over to him. "Ready to talk?" he asked. The White Wolf nodded before running a hand through his hair. "I'm not going to lie. It's been hard. I've been able to clear my head and I think I understand why she did it. I'm just at a loss at where she got the idea from," Bucky admitted. Seiryu lowered his spirit form onto the arm of the couch. "Before we get into that, I want to know exactly how you feel about Phoenix and why. I'm genuinely curious about that. What was it about her?" he asked. The White Wolf looked at the opposite wall. "She wasn't afraid of me. Not even once. She accepted all of me. My demons, my struggles…everything. How can anyone not fall for that?" he admitted before looking at his hands. "But I broke her, Seiryu. I broke her. She only went that far because of me. You said it yourself. She only got the idea because I'm a human. I never should've pursued her…," he finished, bowing his head.

Seiryu was quiet for a moment. Bucky got a scowl on his face. "The thing that gets me most is that she made me look like a liar in front of you," he groaned. The dragon lifted off to float in front of him. "I wonder where that idea came from. Considering I've been alive roughly fifty times longer than you and roughly forty times longer than her, I have no reason to think you were lying about anything. Phoenix didn't lie about anything either. Unless there are things about you that she, and myself by extension, don't know, there are no lies of omission either. In my opinion, you only think she made a liar out of you because you're under the impression that my view of humans is largely negative," the High King said.

Bucky looked at him confused. The spirit seemed to age before his eyes. "Humans are made in the Weaver's image. It's because of them that All World is in such a state of decay. No one knows that better than me and those I call my brothers. We've been around too long to turn a blind eye to that. But it is what it is. The Masters are meant to guide the entire world, human and animal alike, on the path of right action. We're not perfect ourselves and I've made plenty of big mistakes myself. All that aside, I think you had this idea that you had to prove yourself to me, even though our first meeting was under extenuating circumstances and we're having our first real conversation now. You think you're to blame for her choices. I can tell you that you're not. Her choices are her own and there was never a need for you to prove yourself to me at all," he assured the man.

Bucky looked away. The dragon had a point. But he still felt responsible because, deep down, he knew they were incompatible on many levels but he didn't care. He just wanted Phoenix in his life. Shame started to settle on him and Seiryu picked up on that. "Speak your mind. You'll get no judgment from me," he said simply. The White Wolf opened and closed his hands. "I won't lie. I know you would know if I did. I almost did something terrible a couple of days after I got home," he said. Seiryu stayed quiet. "I wanted…," Bucky paused for a moment to swallow hard. "I wanted to hurt her back. I had a number ready to call and everything. I wanted to hurt her the way she hurt me. But I couldn't. I snapped out of it before I did anything," he confessed. Seiryu was wise enough to fill in the blanks so he didn't press for that information.

He watched Bucky bury his face in his hands. "You're right about me, Seiryu. I'm not good for her. I may not have gone through with it but ideation is enough to prove I'm a trash human being. I know it wouldn't have mattered to her in other circumstances but she almost killed herself because of this exact thing," he lamented. The spirit came to hover in front of him. "Humans are complicated creatures. I don't claim to fully understand them even though I've been around them since the sixth day of Century Zero. Your kind and I were created together. I've had millennia to study them and to this day, they baffle me at times," he mused. Bucky looked at him miserably.

"Visceral reactions are normal for your species. You weren't thinking clearly but you managed to stop yourself from doing something you know would make things worse down the line. You and Phoenix can come back from this with time, will, and work. I know none of what I'm saying does anything to assuage your guilt and that's okay. You're the only one who can forgive yourself for your near-lapse in judgment. As for Phoenix, you just have to be willing to meet with her and talk everything out. You both need to really listen to each other. That's the best advice I can give," the High King said. "You really think our relationship is okay?" Bucky asked dully. The spirit set his hands on his knees. "Were I younger and more rash than I am now, tempered by my many years, I'd take her back without hesitation and to the Deadlands with whatever either of you wanted. But that's a question I can't answer. That's between you two," he responded.

Seiryu pulled back to float a little higher, his eyes closed in thought. "We need to brainstorm possible sources for this incident. I was serious when I said this isn't something the Phoenix I know would've ever considered. She got the idea from somewhere and I doubt it was from you. Especially if you were being honest with me when you said none of it was your idea. Tell me, has Phoenix gone anywhere without you in the time she's been here?" he asked. Bucky leaned back on the couch. "She would split her time between here and Central Park at night. That was normal. She needed to be outside as much as she could because of what she is," he ventured. He suddenly sat up as he remembered something. "Wait a second. There was a time when I went looking for her and I saw her exiting a car. She later told me she was taken to the Raft, a high-security prison where a guy we…worked with…is being held. He wanted to meet with her," he explained.

"Could it be this human was the one who got Phoenix's head full of these ideas?" Seiryu wondered. "Helmut Zemo respects Nix to an extent. I don't see why he would…but this is Zemo we're talking about. Sabotage is his thing. I would know. I was used as a tool in a past scheme of his and it worked too well," Bucky scowled. The High King hummed. "That's a start, at least. I'm not privy to any of this so I can't judge. No need to tell me the entire story. It's not information I can personally use and my whole role in this matter is to advise. I suggest you find a way to get to this Raft and see if you can find any information or leads. I'll leave you to it now. I'm expending a lot of energy projecting this spirit form to your dimension and there's nothing more I can do or advise beyond what we've discussed. The rest is up to the two of you. Just remember that I care only for her happiness and that's the only thing keeping me from taking her away from you," Seiryu said before turning away.

"Wait," Bucky said, getting to his feet. The dragon looked over his shoulder. "Do you trust me?" the White Wolf asked. Seiryu pondered the question for a moment before turning back to face him. "I don't think this is a matter of trust. Phoenix was with me for sixty years. I was happy. But then you come into her life and everything changes. I'm not going to insult your intelligence and say this whole thing hasn't hurt me on some level. It did hurt when she chose you. But what can I really do about it? When you're a near-immortal with a calling like mine, you can't be selfish about anything. Everyone who comes into my life leaves eventually. Whether through death or drifting apart, I can only have someone in my life for a short time. My fellow Masters and the Weaver are the only constants I have in this existence I live," he admitted.

Bucky looked a little guilty but Seiryu just sighed in resignation. "My struggles are the fault of no one, James. Least of all you. I was given a task by a being greater than myself and it was His decision to give this task to a dragon, a creature known for extreme emotions. I've long resigned myself to this fate. I wouldn't still be High King if I hadn't by this point. But I'm still only mortal and thus, I'm still bound to my emotions. It would be easier if I was devoid of emotion but that wouldn't make me a good High King. It would make me ineffectual in meeting those I rule where they're at. Life is suffering and the two of us know this better than the majority of mortals. I am heartbroken she chose you but love is fickle and all I can do is hope for the best," the dragon said. "I didn't mean to steal her," the White Wolf said. "But you didn't. You can't steal what wasn't mine to start with, James. I had sixty wonderful years before she decided to be with someone more on her level. Those decades mean more to me than anything else. I'm content," the Master countered.

Seiryu closed his eyes with a small smile. "Good luck, James. Barring a similar incident that requires my intervention again, I doubt we'll be able to talk like this again," he said. "One more question. How did you know she was in trouble?" Bucky asked. The dragon gave him a knowing look. "Normally, I wouldn't notice if something was awry but after sixty years, our bond is very strong. I had a bad feeling so I checked in via the spell and acted accordingly when I saw what she was up to. Teleporting to and from your world put me out for several days because of how much energy it took but for her, it was worth it. Besides, if she had perished, you wouldn't be the only one to suffer the loss. I would have, too, and who knows if I wouldn't take that sorrow out on the East a second time." he responded before winking out of existence. Bucky was left to wonder what that meant and he wondered if it had something to do with that incident Phoenix had told him about when she lost her soul.

Bucky sat back down and pulled out his phone. He hit his contacts and scrolled down to a number and hit the call button. "Sam? It's Bucky. Yeah, things are as fine as they can be, considering my girl is nine states away and she did something stupid. Listen, I need a favor. Do you have any contacts working the Raft? I just got done chitchatting with Seiryu and we think Zemo may be behind Nix's attempt at form expulsion," he said. He listened for a moment before responding. "Hell if I know why. All I know is that she was taken to see him a while back and all this happened after the fact. Zemo respects her to a degree but I don't trust him. How do we know he wasn't the one who put the idea in her head? I need to get to the bottom of this, Sam, if only for my peace of mind. I still don't know where Nix and I stand for each other but this is more for me than it is for her," he said.

More from Sam's end and Bucky just chuckled. "Don't worry. I just want to chat with him. Can you get me in or not? Okay, do whatever you can. I'll be waiting for the call. Thanks, Sam. Later," he said before hanging up. Sighing and sinking back on his couch, Bucky's heart gave a painful thump. He was lonely and frustrated by the number of times he swung between wanting Phoenix to come home and not wanting her around still because of what she had done. He hoped that figuring out the cause of her attempt would help him come to terms with everything and he could decide for sure how to proceed. At least now, he was able to start taking action.