Sooo super unexpectedly had some free time so managed to churn out the next chapter! Two chapters within a few days won't be a common occurrence though! lol
Some filler moments, but lots of plot development in this chapter, I feel like.
Chapter 5
Wednesday November 16, 2005
When Bella woke in the morning, the nausea hit her straight away again. Thankfully, Charlie had left for an early shift, so didn't hear her emptying her stomach this time.
While eating breakfast, her phone rang from inside her backpack, surprising her. Pulling it from underneath her notebooks, she answered without looking at the caller.
"Hello?"
"Bella!" Jake answered and Bella frowned.
"Hey, are you okay?" She asked, suddenly concerned about why he was calling so early, it was unlike him. Even on school days he was rarely up this early.
"Yeah, all good!" He said cheerfully and Bella smiled at his tone. He was just always happy, and it rubbed off on her, sometimes. "I was just wondering, we're having a little reservation slash tribe campfire on the beach this evening, wanna come?"
"Oh." She replied in surprise. That felt exclusive. "Am I welcome?"
"What? Yeah, of course." He replied. "We can all make sure you're safe there, y'know? And Billy said to invite you."
Bella frowned. Billy did? She wasn't really a massive fan of Billy after he had tried to tell Charlie she had treated Jacob wrong, when Billy knew the reason for their friendship troubles was Jacob's transformation. But… Billy was the head of the tribe council, and she was putting the entire pack and tribe at risk just by existing.
"Oh, then sure." She replied. "Sounds fun."
"Great!" He responded. "I'll pick you up from school. I have to go to school today, so Quil is gonna be around patrolling for you tod-"
"Jake, honestly I feel like I only need to know what I need to know about that. It just makes me feel guilty." Bella interrupted.
"You don't need to feel guilty. But okay." He accepted. "But you'll always be safe. Know that, at least."
"I know, Jake." She promised.
"So I'll pick you up from school?"
"Actually, Jake, I'm working tonight. And I can't miss another shift." She remembered and he groaned dramatically into the phone, making Bella roll her eyes.
"Ugh, boring." He remarked and Bella laughed. "Ok, I'll pick you up from work. What time do you finish?"
"Six."
"Coolio." He said. "See ya later."
Before she could reply he had hung up and she put her phone back into her bag with a shake of her head. She drank a glass of water before leaving for school, the nausea returning at the thought of being around the tribe for hours, after an already long day of school and work.
The nausea hadn't passed by the time she made it to school, like she hoped it would. She parked up next to Ben's car, hopping out and standing by her human friends, who weren't all eager to greet her, but Angela smiled and moved to stand by Bella.
"You doing okay?" She said quietly.
"Yeah, just… nauseous." She answered just as quietly. "Like, all the time."
"Doesn't sound fun." Angela smiled. "I heard that passes though."
"I sure hope it does." Bella responded.
First period, Bella had English and she dreaded it. Her table partner was Jess, and while she had given up a while ago to get Bella to communicate properly with her, she still seemed to want to update her on the latest Forks High gossip. And that included trying to get any gossip out of Bella. She felt a bit bitter about it, since the Cullen's departure was just gossip for her. She doesn't remember Jessica ever acting like she cared about how Bella was doing, she just wanted to get Bella to spill details.
She made it to class before Jess, who bounced in a few minutes after her, throwing herself in her seat. Bella just looked forward, intending to ignore her, but Jess had other ideas.
"Soooo…" Jess started, pulling her books from her bag. "Where were you yesterday?"
Bella bit her tongue, and tried not to laugh at how much Jessica would love the gossip she'd get if Bella actually told her the truth. Oh, just almost being murdered by an evil vampire and being saved by my best friend and his friends. They're werewolves, by the way.
Instead she just shrugged. "Wasn't feeling good. Charlie made me stay home."
Jess just huffed, obviously expecting more of an answer. "You've been ill a lot recently."
"I guess." Bella responded, feigning ignorance. She hoped Jess wouldn't draw correct conclusions. "My immune system is shot, since…"
Since being depressed and hardly eating or getting enough sun and fresh air. Bella didn't need to fill in those gaps, Jess knew.
"Oh that makes sense, I guess." Jess remarked. "I've just noticed you getting sick."
Bella cursed her. Why did Jess have to be so observant? Her own father hadn't even noticed, but of course the school gossip has to watch her every move.
"Yeah, I er…" She muttered. "I have anxiety, it makes me sick sometimes."
"Oh." Jess replied, frowning. She thought about it, and figured that explanation made sense.
"Sorry, that's so gross and embarrassing." Bella added, trying to convince her further that there wasn't anything more going on.
Jess dropped it after that and Bella relaxed. She knew if she did stay in Forks, which was unlikely, she couldn't hide it. But she was putting it off as long as possible. Eventually she'd be leaving, anyway. They didn't need to know. She couldn't bear for her situation to just become Forks' latest drama, it was worth more than that.
After a few periods, she was finding herself feeling incredibly tired. She wanted to groan loudly at the thought of having to work later, but she tried to look at it positively, as she did really need the money, and Mrs Newton was more than generous with her wage, so she needed to keep her job, no matter how much she hated it sometimes.
After last period, which was Biology, one class she really struggled to focus in, the teacher called for her to stay behind after the dismissal bell, which made the class all look straight at her and all give a "oooooh" and Bella resisted the urge to roll her eyes. They all knew she wouldn't be in trouble. She was ahead of her peers, spending most biology lessons listening about projects she'd completed weeks ago.
Mr Banner motioned for her to sit on the closest desk to his after the class had all left the room and she complied, a bit warily.
"So I've been looking at your progress, Bella." He remarked. "You're really quite ahead of the class at this point."
She nodded. "I've just been working a lot, outside of school. Keeps me… busy."
He nodded thoughtfully for a second, and Bella knew he was likely thinking about the reason that she had needed a reason to keep busy. She hated that everyone knew. It almost made her want to leave.
"Look, the work is all at an amazing standard. Sometimes students get too confident, get ahead thinking they'll finish high school quicker but it just leaves them more behind because they didn't understand the subjects or projects entirely. But yours… it's honestly better and more effectively completed than the rest of the class will probably achieve when it's due. " He said, stopping his pacing to sit at his desk in front of her, picking up the last project she'd given to him, one that wasn't due for months. "And… well, you're almost done with this class entirely."
Bella nodded again, aware of this. She was almost done with the last project she needed to do, then she had the final exams. One in December, then the very final exam, which wasn't until April.
"Are you this ahead for your other subjects?" He wondered.
"Some I'm done with. Some I'm on track with but working on." She admitted. "In two months or so I'll be done with them all. Then I'll just have my finals."
"Great work." He praised, and Bella blushed. She hadn't done it to complete her classes or anything, it was just easier to keep herself busy with something productive. "I just wanted to ask since… we don't do this often, but you could finish High school early if you stay on this track."
Bella looked up at him in surprise. She had thought about it, but hadn't really considered it to be a possibility. This would make things a lot easier. She could finish high school early, and leave to go to college early too. Or say she wants to do some traveling before going to college, maybe? It would make her leaving much less suspicious.
"That would be great." She responded. "It would be nice to have more time between High school and College, maybe do some traveling?"
Mr Banner smiled and nodded, and she smiled back, knowing that she'd just managed to begin her cover story.
"I'll discuss it with the relevant staff for you, Bella." He replied. "You should be proud of yourself. I'm sure your father will be?"
Bella almost let her smile falter. He would be. But then she'd be lying to him. She tried not to dwell on it, pushing the thought from her head and reminding herself that she'd be lying to him, but it would be to protect him.
She thought about the possibility of finishing high school early for the rest of the day, and by the time the final dismissal bell rang, she had decided she would absolutely aim for it. When she reached her truck, Mike was waiting by the passenger side, and Bella sighed, knowing what this meant.
"Hey Bella!" He greeted, waving excitedly and Bella raised an eyebrow. "Sooo… Tyler drove me today. Since you're working anyway-"
"Sure." She interrupted, getting into the driver's side while he excitedly got into the passenger seat. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes, feeling his eyes on her face. She felt bad, almost, that Mike still seemed to think he had a chance with her. She'd hardly even spoken to him in the past few months, so she wasn't sure why he was so persistent.
"Glad you're back at work." He said conversationally as she pulled out of the lot. "It's been quiet without you!"
Bella raised an eyebrow slightly. She never really spoke at work, aside from talking with customers, so she doubted her absence had made that much of a difference.
Once they arrived at the store, Bella grabbed the ugly orange vest from under the counter, slipping it on while Mike went to see his Mom who was in the back office as usual, likely doing paperwork. The store was quiet, as usual, and time passed without any customers, so Bella was filling the time with tidying the shelves, rearranging products. She could tell Mike had been given the task while she was away, most of the products were facing the wrong way, but she was almost grateful for his incompetence, it was giving her something to focus on.
At some point Mike had entered the shop floor again and was humming to himself while he sat behind the counter, drumming his fingers on the desk.
"So how are you finding senior year?" Mike asked, deciding he'd be the one to start some conversation. He had long accepted that Bella would gladly work in silence if he didn't try to initiate it.
"Good, I guess." Bella responded. "You?"
"Ugh." He started, standing up to come out from behind the counter and stand next to Bella, who was finishing stacking shoe boxes in the corner of the store. "I mean, it's ok. I'm just so behind! I wish I hadn't fooled around last year."
"You'll manage it, Mike." She responded, shooting him a reassuring smile. Although, she wasn't actually sure he would. He was very behind, and in the classes she shared with him, he didn't seem to get much done.
"I dunno." He muttered. "I guess. Are you on track?"
"Yeah." She said quietly. She didn't know how honest to be here, since she didn't want to upset him, but he asked, so she decided to admit the truth. "Ahead, actually. Mr Banner thinks I could be done early."
"Woah." He said, impressed. Bella tried not to blush. "Awesome. I'm jealous."
"Eh, don't be." She said, moving to the next stack of shoe boxes which were all also facing the wrong way. "I've only been able to get ahead since I've… had nothing else to do. Trying to keep my mind busy, y'know?"
He opened his mouth in an o shape, understanding what she meant.
"Oh," He responded. "At least you'll be done early though… what are you gonna do when you're done?"
"Not sure." She responded, hesitantly. She had already told Banner she thought of traveling, which is close to the truth, so she continued with that story. "I could go to college early, maybe. But I was thinking of doing some traveling. I'll keep myself busy somehow."
Mike nodded, impressed again. He'd assumed Bella would be struggling too, given the last few months. But it seemed that it had the opposite effect on her schoolwork. Suddenly, he was worried again. He watched Bella stack, and as he did, he remembered something Jess had told him earlier today.
Bella finished the last stack, and felt Mike's eyes on her as she walked around the aisle, carrying some boxes that had been misplaced, and placed them on the correct shelf. His eyes followed her curiously as she continued looking at the shelves, checking things were correctly priced and labeled. When content that the aisle was complete, she moved onto the next, Mike moving with her, his eyes not leaving her. He wasn't even being subtle about watching her, and it was making her uncomfortable.
"What?" She asked, looking up at him. He shook his head slightly, breaking his gaze from her body. Bella frowned, was he checking her out? He'd always followed her around like a lovesick puppy but he'd never objectified her like that.
"Sorry." Mike said. "I just…"
"You what?" Bella asked, sighing. "If there's something you want to ask me Mike, just ask me."
"Jess said something today." Mike started and Bella groaned.
"Whatever she's telling you, it's probably bull crap, Mike. You know what she's like." She said to him as she moved a display of compasses to the right spot.
"Yeah, I don't think it's true." He said quickly. "But she seems to."
"Yeah, and what is it?"
"Well, she thinks you and that Black kid-" Mike stammered and Bella rolled her eyes. She wasn't surprised people at school thought they were a couple, and weirdly, the thought of them thinking that didn't bother her like she thought it would. "He's not black, I mean his surna-."
"Jacob," She told him and he nodded.
"Well.. are you with him?" Mike asked. "It's not my business, of course. But she thinks you are and-"
"He's just my friend, Mike." She interrupted. "He's been there for me a lot recently, that's all."
"Oh. Cool." Mike said and Bella could hear the relief in his voice, making her cringe internally. "So you're not pregnant with his baby either, then?"
Bella dropped the compass in her hand and looked at him incredulously.
"No." She confirmed. She was suddenly annoyed. She thought Jess had accepted what she told her this morning in class, but clearly not. Or she did and just wanted to spread rumors about Bella regardless. "I am not pregnant with his baby."
Not exactly a lie. She thought to herself, hiding a smirk.
"I didn't think so." He replied. "You know Jess, she…"
"Honestly, Mike, I don't know why Jess feels the need to spread all these rumors about me, but trust me, whatever she tells you, 99 out of 100 times, it's not true." Bella spoke. "Like, don't even bother asking next time."
He smiled sheepishly, nodding his head. "Sorry."
"It's fine, Mike." She sighed. "I am glad you asked instead of just believing her, but I haven't spoken to Jess properly in months. So she's not privy to anything about me that nobody else already knows. So just… don't listen to her, not when it's about me."
"Okay. I promise." He said genuinely and Bella shot him a smile. At least that's one person who won't be contributing to the Bella-rumor-mill at school.
"So… that also means you're not secretly Mr Banner's daughter, too?" Mike asked, smirking, and Bella rolled her eyes, pointedly ignoring him while she finished her task.
A few hours later, Mrs Newton dismissed Bella a little early, which Bella was thankful for since her feet were starting to ache from standing up and the nausea was starting to return. Bella turned the corner from the store to head to the parking lot, but was stopped when a figure jumped in front of her, making her jump back and flinch. She was about to scream before she realized who it was.
"Jacob!" She said, hitting him in the chest with her left hand, and putting her right hand over her heart. "You can't do that shit."
"Sorry." He said sheepishly. "I guess that's probably not the best idea, considering.."
"The evil vampire we know wants to kill me?" Bella said sarcastically and Jacob smiled at her shyly, rubbing the back of his head.
"Sorry?"
"Sure." She rolled her eyes and he jumped into her truck, taking the driver's seat. Bella first wanted to object, but realized that she didn't really feel like driving right now, so let him take the lead. At least she could just sit back and rest for a little while.
"How was work?" He asked and Bella shrugged, hopping into the passenger seat.
"It was work." She remarked and he frowned at her noncommittal answer. "It was fine, Jake."
"Oh, have you eaten?" He frowned as he drove the truck from the parking lot. "I'm sure Emily is gonna cook something but do you want to stop-"
"Ugh, no." Bella said, grimacing. "Not right now."
"You ok?" He asked, concerned.
"Yeah, just…" She started, turning her face to look out of the window as they drove towards La Push. "Still full from lunch."
He didn't believe her, but didn't push further. He'd just make sure she ate something tonight. He didn't know how she was standing up sometimes, he rarely saw her eat much.
When they arrived at the small beach, which Bella realized wasn't the beach she was used to. This part of the beach was a small area, the large cliff surrounding it making it appear separate from the larger part of La Push beach she was used to. They had dropped the truck at Emily's house, and then taken a short walk down a path which brought them out at the shore, where the park and a few other members of the tribe were sitting already, around a campfire.
Jake smiled at Bella in encouragement, feeling her sudden awkwardness. She felt out of place here. No matter how much Jake told her she was welcome and belonged, she didn't think that everyone in the tribe felt the same way. Some of them seemed to invite her with open arms though.
"Hey, Bella!" Emily said and excused herself from her spot next to the campfire where she appeared to be cooking some burgers. She embraced her into a hug quickly, shocking Bella slightly. "I'm so glad you could come tonight, too."
Bella smiled awkwardly before Jake pulled her away to sit by the fire, close to Quil and Embry who appeared to be having a passionate debate about something. Bella felt lightheaded, maybe due to the lack of food she'd had today, so she sat down gladly next to Jacob who seemed to pick up on her unease.
Jacob had told Bella the meeting was for everyone and anyone on the tribe, just a social gathering. But the way the council gathered around the other side of the fire, occasionally glancing at her, she felt like this wasn't exactly the case. It made sense that Victoria was causing some tension within the tribe, and that was because of her.
"I feel like a pariah, Jacob." She whispered to him. "I'm not sure I should be here."
He had previously joined in with Quil and Embry's conversation, but her voice drew his attention back to her.
"What? No." He murmured. "You're not a pariah."
"How can I not be, Jake?" She whispered, tears coming to her eyes without her permission. "Your whole tribe is at risk because of me."
"It's not at risk." He scoffed. "You really have no trust in the pack, do you?"
"I do." She lied. It's not that she didn't trust them, she just didn't think they really had any kind of chance against Victoria.
"Right." Jacob said, rolling his eyes. "Hey, Quil?"
Quil looked around Jake's shoulder so he could see Bella properly, offering her a smile in greeting.
"So… Bella doesn't appear to think we're capable of defeating this vampire." Jacob spoke and Bella's mouth dropped open.
"That's not what I said, Jake." she muttered, suddenly aware that the circle of people had become silent now and all eyes were on them.
"No, no, you didn't." He admitted. "But I know you. I just wanna calm your clear nerves."
She didn't have the heart to tell him that her shakes and nausea had nothing to do with nerves about Victoria.
"Bella, dude." Quil said. "Trust me, we got it."
Bella smiled, letting out a slight laugh.
"We're watching out for you, and for Charlie, Bella." Paul said and Bella felt surprised that he had been the one to speak directly to her. "We won't let her hurt you, Charlie, or anyone else."
"I appreciate it." Bella said weakly. "I just don't want anyone to get hurt."
Again, this initiated laughter from not only the pack, but the council members too. Emily gave her a comforting smile again though, knowing exactly how Bella felt. Emily had more of a clue of how safe the wolves were, but it was natural for her to worry about her fiance, after all. She was much more relaxed when he was by her side.
"We won't get hurt." Embry remarked, filling his mouth with a burger. "And even if we do, we heal super fast."
"You do?" Bella asked curiously.
"Yeah. Honestly I've broken multiple bones since transforming. In a few hours they're good as new." Jake replied.
"You broke bones?!" She gasped. "How?"
"We play-fight." He shrugged. "It happens sometimes."
Bella rolled her eyes, but knowing they could heal that fast did provide her with some comfort. Jake smiled, seeing her relax just slightly, but that was enough for him for now. They hid the reality of the situation from her - if they did happen to get bitten by Victoria, it would be fatal. But since none of them planned to get bitten, she didn't really need to know about that fact.
"We will end her." Sam affirmed and Bella met his gaze. It was fierce, but not in a scary way. In a way that comforted her, and made her feel safe.
"And that's final." Billy spoke and Bella relaxed at his input.
As they all laughed and shared stories over the campfire, Bella found herself feeling even more nauseous, and more lightheaded. She hadn't attempted to eat anything yet despite both Jacob and Emily's gentle coaxing, but she hoped they didn't read too much into it. Jacob definitely did, and was determined to have her eat something before he took her home.
"Bells?" He asked again a while later. "I'm gonna grab a burger. Gonna grab you one too."
Bella opened her mouth to protest, but he gave her a look that told her she shouldn't bother trying. She just nodded instead and watched him walk to the fire, pick up two burgers and bring them back, placing one of them in her lap on a paper plate. Bella couldn't deny it did smell good, but the smell somehow still made her feel nauseous. Jacob patted her arm before biting into his.
Slowly, she took a bite of the burger, the small bite feeling large in her mouth as she chewed. After she managed to keep that down, she took a few more. She knew she needed to eat, but each bite felt heavy in her stomach.
Soon, the nausea returned, and she knew she was going to vomit, and soon. She placed the burger on its plate next to her on the bench then stood up, almost losing her footing as she did, but Jacob caught her.
"You ok?" He asked, standing up too.
"Yeah," She replied, turning to Emily. "Can I use your bathroom?"
Emily nodded, and Bella took off down the path towards Emily's house, not looking back to check if Jacob was following her because she knew he was. That was confirmed by the knock on the door after she had shut herself in the bathroom, splashing water on her face to try and combat the nausea. She realized the bathroom had no lock, and was half expecting Jacob to just walk in.
"Bells?" He asked and Bella sighed.
"I'm fine." She responded quietly. "I just needed to pee."
She heard Jacob move away from the door and she relaxed slightly in relief before she tensed up again, the nausea coming back full force. She turned and found herself bending over the toilet, vomiting the small amount of burger she thought she'd managed to stomach.
She felt warm hands on the back of her neck, holding her hair away. She stiffened and groaned, trying to push them away.
"Shh." She heard Jake say and he rubbed her back. "Why didn't you tell me you were sick?"
She shook her head slightly, pulling herself up to sit against the bathtub.
"I wouldn't have pushed you to eat if I knew, Bells." He said apologetically and Bella shrugged.
"It's fine," She muttered. "I'm not sick, I just…"
"You just what?" Jake asked. "Let me help, Bella."
She looked at his face, his kind eyes boring into her as she contemplated. She had been against telling him the truth, but the more she considered it, the more she thought maybe it would be a good idea. At least she wouldn't be carrying the burden alone. Telling someone would make her feel better mentally, at least. Angela knew, but she couldn't be completely honest with Angela about what the pregnancy actually meant for her. But Jake? She could be completely honest with Jake.
She took a deep breath, deciding in the moment before she changed her mind.
"Can we go somewhere?" She asked quietly. "Just you and I?"
"Of course." Jacob replied and he helped her stand, guiding her outside to her truck. "You stay here, I'll go grab our stuff."
He left Bella sitting in the passenger seat and ran back down the path, gaining the attention from everyone sitting around the campfire.
"Bella isn't feeling good." He said simply, picking up the blanket from the bench that he'd taken from her truck when they arrived. "I'm gonna drive her home."
"Oh no." Emily said. "Please, give her my love."
"Of course, Em." Jake smiled back.
"Everything good, Jake?" Sam asked, sternly, and Jacob gave one short nod, running back to Bella before anyone else could say anything.
He found Bella curled up in the passenger seat of the truck and he frowned at the way she curled her arms around her middle. He suddenly felt extremely guilty for bringing her out at all. He got in and without saying anything, drove them from Emily's house towards the usual part of the beach that they met on, planning on bringing her to the trunk that they often sat on, watching the sun set.
When they arrived, he helped Bella from the truck and held his arm around her shoulders in support until they reached the trunk, and he helped her sit as she still appeared shaky on her feet. She smiled in response and laid her head on his shoulder silently, enjoying his warmth.
"I wish you'd told me you were feeling crap." He said silently, looking out across the water. "I could've taken you home."
"It's not your fault, Jake." She replied. "I kinda always feel crap, these days."
"Right…" He said. "I get that. I know things get to you sometimes. I've noticed since the day you brought those bikes to my house."
"I guess I thought I was better at hiding it than that." Bella whispered and Jake laughed.
"Nope. Sorry to break it to you." He laughed. "But this feels different. Just promise me you're okay?"
Bella sat up and looked at him. Once again his kind eyes broke her defenses. This is it. She has to tell him. She'd convinced herself he would find out anyway, no matter how much she tried to hide it. She knew she'd have to leave eventually, but could she really go without telling Jacob the truth? She didn't think she could. So she may as well just tell him now. Taking a deep breath, she forced her shoulders to relax.
"I'm pregnant, Jake." She says quietly, avoiding looking at his face to see his disappointment.
"What?" He sharply responded, his voice suddenly loud, making Bella flinch. "You're… what?"
She looked up at him warily and he looked shocked but also confused. She thought she'd been pretty straightforward in her admission.
"Pregnant." She said again and he blinked and shook his head.
"I mean." He started. "… who?"
"Him, Jake." She replied, knowing he'd know who she meant.
"But that's impossible." He argued, standing and pacing around the fallen branch Bella sat on.
"Clearly not." She remarked, following him with her eyes, until he suddenly stopped, and his head shot up to look at her.
"You mean, you…" He started, a disgusted look on his face. "With him?"
Bella looked away from his face. She knew he'd be disappointed, since she knew exactly how he felt about the Cullens and vampires in general, but she didn't want to see the look of repulsion on his face. It honestly offended her.
"That's usually how it happens, Jake." She snapped. She was looking towards the ground, and she saw his feet stop in her line of vision.
"Naw, I'm sorry Bells." He said, sitting next to her. "It's just a shock, I guess."
She shrugged. "I know the idea repulses you, but I loved him, Jake."
He smiled sadly, putting his arm around her shoulders. He noted to himself that she had said loved in the past tense, but he knew as well as she did that she definitely still had feelings for the vampire, even if he'll never understand it. And now she's pregnant. Something the tribe never thought possible, based on legends. Cold ones were frozen in time, dead but walking. It made no sense that they'd be able to reproduce.
"I just didn't think it was possible." He remarked.
"Neither did I." She muttered. "He told me it wasn't."
Jacob wondered if he really had known it to be a possibility. His hatred for him managed to triple in the last 5 minutes. He not only fucked her, then left her, but left her impregnated with a fetus that is half him. Likely half his kind.
He suddenly realized there was no way he couldn't tell the pack about this. It was their job, no, it was their law that vampires had to be eliminated by them. The Cullens had been an exception due to the treaty, but any other had to be hunted by them. He felt torn, since he absolutely felt the need to destroy the fetus that had begun growing in Bella's uterus, knowing it will likely only do harm, but he couldn't just destroy it like any other vampire. It was inside Bella. He had to do this properly.
"Have you tried to contact him?" He asked and noticed her roll her eyes.
"Of course." She responded. "I google all of their names daily hoping they'll slip and something will give them away. All I get via email is receipts telling me the email failed to send."
"Shit, I'm sorry." He said. "What a dick."
She slapped him playfully on the arm. "He just doesn't know. He doesn't owe me anything."
Jake disagreed. He glanced down at her, his eyes traveling to her stomach, which didn't look any different to him. She caught his eye and sighed.
"Is it…" Jake starts, not knowing how to ask. "Is it hurting you?"
"No." She replied, frowning. "I mean I can't eat because I'm so nauseous, but the internet tells me that's normal."
"This explains a lot." He muttered. "You could've told me, y'know."
"I couldn't." She said, sighing. "I still am not sure I should've."
"What?" He frowned. "No, you should have. I'm glad you did."
She smiled up at him and he noticed how her arms wrapped around her stomach, almost protectively.
"I just don't know what's safest, Jake." She whispered. "I know I have you but I still feel so alone. The people who could help me aren't here, and I could be putting anyone I tell at risk."
"Well, I'm definitely at no risk." He remarked.
"I guess not." She replied. "But before I knew about you, I had nobody. I can hardly tell Charlie."
"You have me now." He smiled and Bella smiled back. She did truly feel better about him knowing. Even if she wasn't sure what it meant for her.
"I'm glad." She whispered. "I just feel like it's not going to change what I need to do."
He frowned, tilting his head. When he'd decided just minutes ago that termination would be the best option for Bella's health and her safety, he was convinced he was going to have to talk her into it, so he hadn't really wanted to bring up the subject right now.
"What's that?" He coaxed, a bit hesitant.
"Leave." She shrugged. "Charlie can't know. And I don't know what this baby is gonna be like."
Jake frowned, shaking his head. So she hadn't been considering termination, but she planned to leave.
"What?" He said, snapping his gaze to hers. "You can't leave."
She shrugged. "What else can I do, Jake? It's best for everyone if I do."
"No, no it's not." He shook his head. "Charlie will go insane if you just take off. So will I. Were you even planning on telling us that you were going to take off? Jesus, Bella."
"I'm sorry." She whispered. "I just don't know what to do, Jake. I can't even see a doctor, I don't know if the baby is… normal, or if it's more like him. There's so much I don't know, and I'm scared, Jake."
"We can take care of that." He scoffed, pulling her into his arms. "We have doctors on the res that can do it."
She pulled back suddenly.
"No." She replied harshly, standing up. "I'm not doing that."
Jake sighed, knowing she'd probably choose this. And yeah, he completely sided with the pro-choice side of this argument, and he'd never force her to do something she didn't want to do, but this was different. He had to make her understand the danger this pregnancy could put her in, and the people around her if it is born more vampire than human. A killer vampire baby is not something that the pack need to have to deal with, although he had to hold back a smirk at the image that conjured in his mind.
"Bells, this pregnancy…" Jake started. "It can't be safe. If it's his, then it's probably gonna be born with some traits of his kind. It might have them while it's inside you. What if it sucks you dry from the inside?"
"He won't." She said sternly. Jacob didn't miss the pronouns she used. She's already grown attached. "I know it could be dangerous Jake, but things seem pretty normal so far."
"So far, yeah, because you're so early on that it's probably not even the size of a strawberry."
"It's a baby, Jake." She said to him, tears welling up in her eyes and Jake froze. He didn't want or mean to make her cry.
"It's my baby." She continued. "I don't get it either, Jake. I never saw myself as a mother, I never wanted that. But I feel something for this baby, already. I don't understand it, and I can't explain it, but it's strong, Jake."
Jake pulled her down to sit back on the fallen branch and he wrapped his arms back around her as she spoke.
"I don't know whether it's because it's a part of him. Some proof that he was actually real, but what I feel is real. You know what I was so scared of when Laurent almost killed me? I wasn't scared of dying. I wasn't thinking about Charlie, or even you. I was thinking about my baby. And the fact that because I was so stupid, they wouldn't even have a chance at life."
She took a shaky breath before pulling away slightly from Jacob so she could look at his face.
"I don't expect you to understand that," She explained. "And I don't expect you to stick around if you don't want to take the risk. I'll understand if you don't."
He shook his head. "I'm with you, Bella. I don't understand it, no. But I'm here for you."
He truly didn't understand. To him, the fetus was a risk, and he couldn't really see it as anything else. He made a silent promise to himself that as soon as there was a risk to Bella's life, he would talk to her again about terminating. If it was a baby she wanted, there are other ways she could get that. But for now, he stood by her, even if he was watching closely for signs that the fetus was a danger. He just had to figure out how to keep this from the pack. If they found out, they wouldn't be as eager to adopt Jacob's 'wait and see' approach.
"Thanks, Jake." She whispered, letting herself settle into her arms again.
They sat there together for a while, watching the sun set. While they sat, Jacob let the revelation set in. He was scared, not for the same reasons Bella was. He was scared of losing her. While he sat there, thinking about all the risks, he had an idea. One that he didn't know why he hadn't thought of sooner.
"So…" Jacob started and Bella looked up at him from his side. "Best case scenario we find Doctor Fang and he helps you out with this."
Bella rolled her eyes at his nickname for the Cullen patriarch, but nodded slightly. The thought of seeing the Cullens again scared her, since she knew things weren't what she thought they were between them. She thought it unlikely that they'd even want to see her, but she knew that he was probably the only person who could help her right now. They owed her that, at least.
"Right," She whispered. "But I've tried, Jake…. They don't want me to find them."
"Well, let me try too." He replied. "I dunno what I can do that you haven't done, but another set of eyes might help."
Bella shrugged but nodded. She knew it was unlikely he'd find anything.
"Anyway," He continued. "Until we do find him… Sue can possibly help."
"Sue?" Bella questioned.
"Yeah." He said thoughtfully. "She's a nurse, but she has been the midwife for multiple tribe pregnancies and births in the past."
Bella gave him a look of hopeful surprise. Sue would know about vampires, if she held that role. She vaguely remembered Sue, husband of Harry who was a good friend of Charlies. She recalled a friendly, caring face.
"I'd have to make sure she doesn't spill to the council or the pack though." Jacob continued. "I'm not entirely sure I could convince her to do that."
"They'll find out eventually if I do stay, Jake." Bella responded. This is exactly why she thought it best to leave. She wasn't stupid, the pack would view the baby as a risk just like Jake does.
"You're not leaving." He said quickly then returned to the topic at hand. "I'm picking Billy up from Harry's soon. I'll talk to Sue then."
"Are you sure?" Bella asked. She didn't want to get her hopes up, but being able to talk to someone candidly about her pregnancy would be a huge relief for her.
"Well, I can ask." He smiled. "But Sue is good, I'm sure she will. And if she says no, I can always ask Emily. Sue has been teaching Emily some of the basics. She and Sam want a baby soon, so she's really interested in that stuff right now. She's no professional, but she's better than nobody."
"I just don't want to impose." Bella muttered.
"You wouldn't be. Both Sue and Emily are good, aaaand you're stuck with me." Jacob smirked and Bella rolled her eyes. "I'm still gonna try to find Doctor Fang though. This is their mess."
Bella didn't like the word mess to describe it, but accepted that Jake was right. They sat there for a while longer, watching the sun slowly disappear. Once it had become dark, Jacob excused himself to go and pick up Billy from Harry's, and promised Bella he would talk to Sue while he was there. The thought left a knot in Bella's stomach, this had been her secret for a while now, but now two people will know, on the very same day. She felt a lot of relief in the matter, too. Bella took a deep breath, and made her own way home, too.
As Jacob drove to Harry and Sue's place, only a 10 minute drive from the beach where he'd left Bella, he ran through the options in his head. He didn't want to just come out with the truth, he wasn't sure how Sue would respond to it. But then, how was he going to ask her to help without telling her what they needed help with?
Ultimately, he realized he was going to have to tell her. At least something as close to the truth as possible. It scared him, because if the council found out, so would the pack. And this was something he'd be trying to keep from them for as long as possible.
When he reached the house, he found Billy and Harry in the living room, both actively watching the football game which appeared to have gone over time. Usually this would annoy him since he'd have to wait for the game to be done before Billy would leave with him, but today it would benefit him as Billy likely wouldn't even notice him talking to Sue.
Sue had just arrived in the room, placing a plate of chips on the table which Harry dug into without acknowledging his wife at all. Sue shook her head, laughing, before looking up and noticing Jacob and giving him a small wave in greeting.
"Sue?" Jacob asked quietly, so the chatting men wouldn't hear him. "Can I talk to you?"
"Of course, honey." She responded, gesturing to the kitchen. He followed her into the small room, sitting at the small table while she poured out some tea for them both. He didn't bother declining it, something about Sue made it hard to say no.
"If I tell you something kinda serious," He started. "Do you promise not to tell anyone?"
She looked at him from the corner of her eye warily. That was not something she could really promise, given her position on the council. She pursed her lips and Jacob just continued holding her gaze. He was well aware of her position and what it meant.
"Depends on what it is," She replied honestly.
"It's something personal." He responded, trying to decide how to hint at the truth. "But it's not about me, it's about, er, someone close to me. Sh-they could do with some help."
"Oh?" She said thoughtfully. She had noticed his slip, and was pretty sure she knew who he was referring to. There was only really one female friend in Jacob's life, unless you counted his sisters. Or maybe Leah, who he crossed paths with occasionally. "I could be discreet, if necessary. As long as there's no risk to anyone else, I could make it work. But I can't make any solid promises, you know that."
"There's no risk." He said quickly. "To anyone else, anyway. And if there was, I would've told the relevant people already, Sue."
He was almost offended she was implying he wouldn't.
"Of course." She agreed. "Now, what is it?"
Jacob glanced at the door, hearing the football game on the television set and knowing the men in the other room likely couldn't hear, but got up and shut the door anyway.
"Okay." He sighed, loosening the tension from his body, shaking his arms. "It's about Bella."
She nodded, taking a sip of her tea and leaning against the counter. "I figured. Is she okay?"
"No… I mean yeah. But also kinda no." He sputtered and she looked at him in confusion, waiting for him to continue.
"She's er… she's pregnant." He admitted. He cringed, feeling the can of worms open as soon as he opened his mouth and spoke the words. She was silent, looking at him in shock for a moment and Jacob regretted even saying anything. He thought about how Bella was going to hate him now, Sue will tell the council, who will tell the pack and then the pack would want to destroy the fetus, probably even destroy Bella.
His musings and panic were interrupted when Sue opened her mouth to speak.
"Okay." She said calmly and lifted herself up away from the counter she was leaning on. "Bring her on over, I'll be able to give her a check up. Do you know how far along she is?"
Jacob looked at her in shock. Her calmness about the situation was a surprise to him. He knew Sue would likely want to help Bella, it was in her nature, but did not expect her to accept the situation this easily.
"The baby is his, you know." He replied, wondering if maybe she hadn't connected those dots.
"I figured." She replied, nodding her head. "That's okay. I'm sure that's been very hard for her."
"Yeah, it has. But-" He started but felt lost for words momentarily. "I just-we don't know what the baby is."
Sue nodded thoughtfully. "Well, I can't say I will know either, every baby I've helped birth has been completely human even though they could grow to be a member of the pack. But we can figure it out, I want to help, Jake. Poor girl must be terrified. Has she seen a doctor at all?"
"No, she was too scared to. With it being his and all." He replied quietly. "And yeah, she seems terrified. But she seems attached to it already."
Sue chuckled at the look on Jacob's face, which was almost one of disgust.
"Pregnancy is a miraculous thing, Jacob." She said, smiling. "The bond is almost instantaneous."
"I think it scares her, a little." He remarked. "She said she never wanted to be a Mom."
"It can definitely be surprising." She replied. "And scary. But she's strong, she'll be fine, Jake."
"She is." He smiled, nodding. "I just wish things were different, for her sake."
"How so?"
"Well, I wish he didn't leave her to deal with this all alone. Even if it's true that he doesn't want to be with her, he should be here with her, helping her through it. She says he didn't know it was possible, but I'm not sure I believe that. How couldn't he?" Jake said angrily.
"I think it's plausible that he didn't know." Sue replied thoughtfully. "I doubt there's been many vampires having relations with humans."
Jake looked at her incredulously.
"I'm not defending him." She defended, putting her hands up. "He should be here, you're right; he did very wrong by that poor girl. But it could be true that he didn't know."
"She says she's been trying to find them, but they're good at hiding." He explained. "I said I'd help too, but there's not much to go on. Dr Cullen could be working somewhere which is something we can consider, but he could be anywhere. Under any name."
"Mmmm." Sue mused. "I wouldn't know where they could be. I do have contacts at some hospitals, but most of them aren't in cities or towns where I imagine a vampire could reside. I'll ask around, though."
Jake nodded, thankfully. Their conversation was then disturbed by Billy calling for Jacob, which he took as his queue to stand and make his way to the kitchen door, which was still closed.
"Bring her to the clinic tomorrow, ok?" She said, putting her hand on his arm. "I promise discretion."
Breathing a sigh of relief, Jake nodded and returned to his father, who was waiting for him in the hallway.
Once Bella managed to escape Charlie and settle into her room for the night, her phone rang. The simple tone ringing loudly in her quiet room made her jump.
She looked at the screen, Jacob. She smiled, feeling thankful that she could finally talk to him honestly and openly about literally everything.
"Hello?" She answered, laying down on her back on top of the covers.
"Hey, Bells." She heard, and her smile grew. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm good." She replied. "I actually managed some dinner tonight. Only the steak, but it's not made a reappearance."
"That's awesome." He replied happily and Bella laughed a little at how such a small feat seemed to make him extremely happy. "So I talked to Sue."
Bella's stomach dropped. This could be the best news she's heard in a long while, or the worst.
"And?" Bella asked hesitantly.
"She's asked to see you, tomorrow." He replied and Bella's heart rate increased. "Wait, that sounded like it could be bad. But it's not! She wants to help you, give you a check up at the res clinic, with discretion of course."
"Really?" Bella asked, letting out a sigh of relief.
"Yeah, Bells. I told you she would." He replied. "Look, if there does turn out to be a risk to others then she'll have to tell the council, but as long as the little vamp is still inside you, I can't see that happening. Afterwards may be another story, though."
"That's fine." She replied quickly. "I get it. If it comes to it, I can leave as soon as the baby is here."
"Sure." He replied. He laid on his bed, too, mimicking Bella's position on her own. He agreed with her, but wasn't so sure it would be that simple. If the baby was a risk to others, the pack, by law, would be forced to eliminate it. Even if she left, they wouldn't let that go. But for now, he'd leave her in ignorance. Although she doubted she was as ignorant of the truth as she acted.
"Thank you so much Jake." He heard her say, and he smiled to himself. He hoped one day she'd feel the same way about him as he did about her, but he wasn't naive enough to think she'd ever get over Edward. Thinking about him made his stomach turn. While he was going to continue to search for the Cullens, he hoped for Bella's sake that he was never left alone with Edward, because it wouldn't end well.
"No biggie." He responded, brushing it off. "So I'll pick you up after school?"
"I have to actually work again after school tomorrow, unfortunately." She replied solemnly. "Only until six again though."
"Ok, I'll pick you up from there at 6." He decided.
Bella agreed and after a few minutes of small talk, Bella excused herself, she was starting to feel sleep taking over. Hanging up the phone and rolling over in bed, sleep came quickly.