Lily

The hunt for Victoria turned out to be far more difficult than any member of the Cullen family would have expected.

Her constant escaping was getting on their nerves and it seemed like she was almost more difficult to catch than James.

At least that's what Edward said.

Her gift seemed to be self-preservation, but her years with James had taught her a lot. Alice didn't seem to be able to see what she was planning, the redheads' plans were too volatile and everyone knew that it was no coincidence.

Lily spent a few days with the Cullens, but it wasn't long before she asked Carlisle to take her back to the cabin. The look on his face broke her heart. His shoulders sagged in defeat and his golden eyes were dull and empty.

It was heartbreaking.

But she had no choice. It wasn't her home and living as the only human in a house full of vampires who could hear every sound, heartbeat and breath was not her idea of relaxation. Especially since there were steps everywhere. Even though she appreciated and enjoyed the feeling of being carried in Carlisle's hands, she felt like she was a prisoner.

Esme mothered her wherever she could and even though she was grateful, it was .. Lily had no words. Maybe she just wasn't used to it, or she was just ungrateful. No matter what it was, she couldn't change the feeling.

Neither Jasper nor Edward seemed surprised, they had probably felt her discomfort and immediately appeased Esme, who was blaming herself.

That was another reason.

Lily couldn't even please herself, let alone a whole household. She couldn't pay attention to every emotional situation of the others and at the same time she didn't want everyone to be considerate. She wondered how Bella did that. She seemed to fit in so perfectly. So effortless.

Lily just wasn't the type to do it. She didn't want to share her secrets, she didn't want to talk about her feelings with people she hadn't known for even a month. Then there was another thought that she knew was unfair.

They had all left.

They had all left Bella.

Not one of them stayed behind with her.

So why should she trust them? If they could do that to Bella, a person who always took care of others first, who was always anxious to help and to be good, to fit in, why should they stay for Lily?

She knew, of course, that her acceptance was probably based purely on the respect and love they felt for Carlisle, but that didn't make it any better.

Carlisle turned his car into the forest road and finally stopped. His mercedes was not intended for the slushy ground, and anyway he was almost faster on foot than with the car. Without a word he took her in his arms and she pressed her head to his shoulder. She felt his grip tighten slightly and she closed her eyes when she felt the wind rush past her.

When she opened her eyes again, she saw the hut and felt a wave of relief crash over her.

It was a familiarity she hadn't even known how much she'd missed it. How much she needed it. She took a deep breath, the familiar scent of the forest, the wood and Carlisle clouded her senses and she suddenly felt lighter.

The hut evidently hadn't noticed her absence; she looked the same as always. Only the roof looked new and stable and the massive new shingles stood out. Apparently Emmett had been here again.

Carlisle seemed to notice her gaze and leaned down to her. His closeness was still intoxicating.

"Emmett is desperately looking for a way to get you running water."

Lily's lips curled up in a smile.

That was Emmett.

Apparently Rosalie had told him how much Lily liked the hut and instead of playing it down, he wanted to optimize it. It was hard not to like him and Rosalie too. That was another topic. Why Rosalie was nice to her was still a mystery to her. Especially after seeing how dismissive she was to Bella.

Carlisle set her down on the bed and immediately made a fire. Lily's eyes searched the hut, something was different, but she couldn't put her finger on it.

Finally Carlisle started to smile.

"He insulated the wholde hut and even attached the old layer over it so you wouldn't notice."

Her heart swelled and she shook her head in amusement.

"Are you hungry?"

"No, not really. Esme fed me well."

He laughed out loud and although it was an angelic sound, she missed something of it.

"Do you want..."

He stopped and looked at his fingers. The fire crackled in the background and Emmett's work had an effect. It was much warmer in the hut than usual at this time of the year.

"Do you want to be alone?"

He avoided her gaze as if dreading her answer. As if he couldn't take it. Suddenly she understood. His reaction to her wanting to leave the house wasn't disappointment, it was fear. He was afraid that she didn't want to be with him. A really absurd thought in her eyes.

"Carlisle."

It took a few moments before he looked at her and when she saw the pain in his eyes, her heart broke. She reached out for him and he responded immediately. Carefully he sat down next to her on the bed and she felt the mattress give way. She opened her eyes again and stared at the bed.

"He changed the mattress too. Rosalie had forbidden him to buy a waterbed."

His voice was toneless and that made the situation almost funnier. Lily gave a small laugh, but immediately remembered the actual topic of conversation and got serious again. She put her hand on his much larger one and his gaze automatically wandered to the contact. He stared at her hand like it was something of value. As if he had just discovered a treasure that he is not yet ready to share with the world.

"I understand if you want to be with your family, especially now."

Confused, he looked up.

"What do you mean?"

Lily swallowed. How could she tell him that although she liked his family, she didn't see herself as part of it and didn't really want to be. At least not yet.

"I think I'm just not used to it. To have so many people around me who .. hear everything, notice everything, see everything. It was just.. a bit much."

He nodded and cocked his head, a gesture that was irresistible.

"I understand."

"But that doesn't mean that I don't want to be around you. On the contrary ... I just don't want ..."

Lily's eyes searched the room and Carlisle waited patiently.

"You don't want that right know? Was it too soon?"

She knew what he was talking about and she thought about it for a moment. That wasn't it, surely one could have waited. But for what? Alex would never come back. What should she have been waiting for? And it had absolutely paid off.

Lily thought about the feeling of Carlisle inside her for a second and shuddered.

It was undescribeable.

"No. Absolutely not. I just don't want to be the reason that keeps you away from your family."

Suddenly Carlisle breathed a sigh of relief. He looked relieved and grinned shyly at her, another irresistible gesture. Actually, all of his gestures and facial expressions were irresistible.

"You're not. If I feel the need, I'll see them. Until then .."

He paused and pressed closer to her. Her heartbeat stumbled and she sighed.

"... until then I'll stay by your side until you kick me out."

"Do you know that this will probably never happen?"

She muttered into his shoulder and closed her eyes. His sweater smelled of detergent and himself. It was a scent that, depending on the situation, could trigger a wide variety of feelings in her. There was the security and craving, the attraction and the pleasure, and a mixture of feelings that she could not classify. Immediately his hand found her arm and he hugged her. She felt his nose in her hair and heard him take a deep breath.

The isolation of the hut brought something else besides privacy - she noticed that Carlisle was also much more free in his movements. It wasn't that he had been neglecting her. By far not. He always made physical contact and was by her side, but it was different. She could hardly name it but it was almost as if he could enjoy the togetherness with her here far better. Until a second ago, at least.

Confused, she raised her head, his body had tensed and he fixed the window. Her heart started racing and she thought of Victoria. Was she back? What did she want from her? Why would she be after Carlisle?

There was a knock and she was startled. Carlisle rushed to the door and opened it, he kept standing in the middle of the door frame so that she could barely pass.

Desperate, she leaned to the side to at least catch a glimpse beside his broad shoulders, it was definitely not Emmett or Rosalie. For one thing, Emmett didn't think about knocking, and for another, Carlisle wouldn't have reacted that way. She also doubted Victoria would knock.

Something was finally moving. Lily's eyes widened.

"Paul ?!"

Immediately she got up and groaned as she strained her knee too quickly, she saw Carlisle winced and was amazed that he had suppressed the urge to rush to her. He was still blocking the door and Lily squeezed past him. His gaze was fixed on the Quileute and his eyes were a little too dark for her liking. He still had every fiber of his body tensed, as if Victoria herself was at her door.

"Lily."

With his over 6 feet and muscles that seemed unreal to her, he was standing tall and proud. His skin shone in a soft bronze tone and the typical Lahote grin was spread across his face. The grin that had broken several hearts. Hers included. He cocked his head and looked at Carlisle as if assessing how he would fare in a fight. Carlisle held his gaze effortlessly and Lily looked back and forth between the men.

"What are you doing here?"

Paul's dark eyes found hers and they sparkled playfully. He hadn't changed a bit, that much was certain.

"Hunt vampires."

He glanced at Carlisle and scornfully pursued it

"Real vampires."

Lily rolled her eyes.

Paul's life was to provoke, but that was when he literally bit his teeth out at Carlisle.

The blond god stared at him, unimpressed.

"And they are around?"

Paul challenged Carlisle with his eyes a little more until he looked at her again and leaned casually on one leg. At first she was surprised that he was here in human form, especially when she thought about the way Sam had reacted back then. But Paul probably wanted to show Carlisle that he wasn't afraid of him. That too would be typical for him.

"Maybe. We'll patrol the area and the hut is close to the border. Very close."

Again he glanced at Carlisle, who was apparently awakening from his stupor.

"Thank you for helping us."

Carlisle's voice was polite as always, but Lily could hear the strain behind it. Paul narrowed his eyes, apparently disliked the idea that he would help vampires. Lily thought for a moment if Carlisle had said it on purpose just to annoy the wolf.

"Blondie and the other one said they need him."

He uttered almost disgusted and Lily rolled her eyes. The show that Paul put on didn't surprise her, not in the least.

"Thanks."

Carlisle's voice was firm, the courtesy gone.

"Always so polite."

He took a step towards him and there was a deep rumble beside her. She winced and stared at Carlisle in disbelief. She hardly recognized him. At that moment it wasn't that hard to believe he was a vampire.

"Stop it. Both of you."

Lily felt like a referee, but above all she wanted to protect Carlisle. He didn't know Paul. He didn't know that Paul just wanted to piss him off. He wanted Carlisle to lose his temper, and from the look if it, he had succeeded.

Paul grinned in satisfaction. He got what he wanted.

"Very well. I should remind you that the treaty is still active."

He was about to turn around when he took one last look at Lily.

"You look good Lily."

And there it was. Carlisle tensed and growled openly at Paul.

He growled.

His eyes were pitch black and he bared his teeth like a wild animal. Paul laughed and started shaking. His stately stature became a huge gray wolf that showed his teeth aggressively.

"STOP!"

Lily intervened, but was immediately pushed away by Carlisle. Suddenly something rumbled behind Paul that sounded like thunder. The gray wolf winced and went to the ground. He shook himself and padded from leg to leg, but kept falling. A black wolf, Sam assumed, appeared behind him and growled at him. He nodded his gigantic head to Carlisle and turned and disappeared into the woods. Paul was still groaning until he turned around and followed the pack leader. Before he disappeared into the forest turned around again and seemed to be grinning at her. Lily let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding. Carlisle stayed in his position until the two were gone and turned to face her. His eyes were slowly turning honey again and the rigid expression grew concerned.

"Everything alright? How is your knee? You shouldn't have got up so quickly!"

His words were racing and she had trouble understanding them. She raised an eyebrow immediately.

"Maybe I wouldn't have had to if you hadn't been standing in the middle of the door."

"He's a wolf. Should I have just asked him in?"

Lily looked puzzled.

"You also ask vampires in, what's the difference."

He looked at her as if she had lost her mind.

"We are in control. The wolves are not. They could transform at any time."

Something in Lily was waking up. She didn't know exactly where it came from but suddenly she didn't like what Carlisle had suggested at all.

"Well Paul looked pretty controlled to me. At least I'm not on his diet."

The accusation was obvious and Carlisle backed away as if she had hit him.

Immediately she felt sorry for her words, but she couldn't take them back either. Even if she had hurt him, she was right. She thought of Jasper and Bella's accident, if you could call it that. She thought of the constant danger the Cullens brought with them, be it from themselves or from the Volturi, Victoria or James. So how could he claim the wolves were worse than them? She wasn't afraid of Carlisle, she knew he would never harm her.

But she wasn't afraid of Paul or Sam either.

"I'm just afraid that something will happen to you."

He sounded resigned and let out a breath. He came closer, cautiously, as if he was just waiting for her to send him away.

"I know. And you know that I'm not afraid of you. But to automatically classify wolves as a danger and to be in the house with vampires is a bit off, isn't it?"

Carlisle averted his gaze. She could see that he wanted to reassure her that his family would never harm her. She believed him, she knew, that he was convinced of it. But he probably was before Jasper's attack, too. She wasn't afraid of the vampire, but she didn't want to downplay the fact that the story had shocked her.

"Yes. You are right. Still-"

"You can't agree with me and then say still."

A slight grin spread across his lips and he suddenly looked as young as her. He tilted his head down and looked at her under half-closed lids. His dark eyes were rimmed with dark blond thick eyelashes and his lips glowed seductively red.

"You know this is unfair."

"What?"

His voice was rough and quiet as he leaned down and ran his nose down her throat. She could almost feel his grin when her heart skipped and whispered.

"You know exactly what I mean."

She hissed in a breath as his lips touched the thin skin under her ear.

"No?"

The cool breath touched her ears and she shivered. Finally she leaned over to him and admitted defeat.

Hours later, while he was painting undefined shapes on her bare back and the fire crackled contentedly in the stove, she sighed contentedly. It was too early to sleep, but Carlisle had made her tired - not that she minded.

She was just about to fall asleep when his velvety voice rang out.

"How do you actually know Paul?"

Lily was suddenly wide awake.