Carlisle
"So, what do you think?"
Carlisle turned his golden eyes from the magazine in front of him and looked at Lily. His breath caught in his throat and he felt his mouth open.
His mate looked young and vibrant in the dim light of the sunset.
Dark blonde waves worked their way down her shoulders like liquid gold, her shoulders proud and straight, skin glistening and Carlisle felt his fingers twitch. Her skin looked so soft and inviting that it took a lot for him not to break the distance between them to touch her.
Yet he hadn't even seen the dress yet.
Alice couldn't endure it any longer and finally begged Lily to wear the clothes she had bought her. After some initial difficulty, Lily finally agreed, leaving Carlisle feeling like she just didn't want to discuss it anymore.
Lily could wear a potato sack and she would still be the most beautiful thing Carlisle had ever seen, but he had to admit that the dress really did look forbiddingly good on her.
Finally, he found his voice and wasn't a bit surprised at how rough it sounded.
"I think..."
Carlisle paused heavily, letting his gaze wander over her perfect form with relish.
"I guess I don't think it's so bad that this stunning sight is reserved just for me."
With a graceful movement, she swung herself onto his lap and laughed. Carlisle felt his mouth tighten into a broad smile, a gesture that by now he almost didn't notice, so often did it occur.
"Yeah, and I thought you were going to introduce me to everyone and show me off?"
His nose traveled along her neck and immediately her grip tightened and her breath hitched like his had before. It was pure magic that the reaction they had for each other never diminished.
"Well, I enjoy having you to myself."
He murmured into her neck, sliding his lips over the sensitive skin. A growl errupted in her chest and he immediately warned himself to be careful.
Even though Lily was holding up amazingly well and was apparently in control, she was still new to this life and her strength, physical as well as ... the other, was still somewhat unpredictable.
He inhaled her scent deeply, it had changed but lost none of its attraction to him. It was strange, so he had thought he would miss the heartbeat, the heat, the humanity but he found so much joy in her new existence that he didn't even get to miss the human.
Carlisle pressed her against him and he felt her follow him without resistance. He knew that her focus was now entirely on him, an ability that surprised Jasper and Edward every time. Carlisle had to admit that he loved it.
He loved the idea that his mate could be absorbed by him. That he could distract her, even in situations where he wouldn't have expected it. In which no one would have expected it.
"Still, I would have liked to be at the party."
Her voice sounded bright and melodic, yet he could hear the sadness from it and he felt abruptly guilty.
It was unfair to leave her out of such an experience but they had all agreed, Lily included, that it wasn't good for anyone to be exposed to such a crowd so early on.
"I know."
Carlisle was grateful that Edward and Jasper didn't voice their other concern.
He knew of his family's thoughts, he knew how they always regarded Lily with a bit of caution, watching her more closely than had Emmett. It was their strength that unsettled them. Carlisle couldn't blame them, it was her power that made him wonder himself. Especially since she was not yet in control of it.
At first he insisted on going away with her, perhaps Alaska or Canada, to escape the hustle and bustle but Lily insisted that as the father of the family he had to be present at this milestone.
Besides, he was the best man.
He felt her bury her nose in his hair and take a deep breath, an action he knew all too well from her. He knew she was just calming down again and he hugged her even tighter. He was her Valium and her heroin at the same time-as she often said.
Her transformation was definitely that among the top three most painful moments of his existence.
The order varied but next to it was his own transformation, just the thought of it was enough to feel the bite wound on his hand and bicep, and his decision to leave her- which admittingly didn't last long.
Never would he have thought that something so good could come from so much pain.
"It would also be unfair to the others."
He murmured into the crook of her neck, and she leaned back to look at him questioningly. Immediately his body shifted with her and she grinned happily at him.
"You'd steal the show from everyone and I'd have to be jealous of anyone who dared look at you."
He shrugged and grinned as she laughed out loud.
"But then you'd have to stay away from the party, too."
Shyly, he averted his gaze.
He was used to being called beautiful by people, but it was still like a miracle to him that Lily felt that way about him even now.
She pressed her forehead to his and he enjoyed the feeling of their same body temperature. His eyes closed and for a moment he felt only her. Her scent, her breath, her body.
Finally, she leaned back again and ran her fingers through his hair.
Displeased, she tugged lightly at his strands, trying to tame the blond locks.
Carlisle's eyes were still closed. It was a strange rule, an unspoken secret, that men enjoyed it immensely when their wives scratched their heads.
His scientific mind wondered if it was still a long-forgotten primate heritage, the mutual lousing and ruffling. Actually, it didn't matter what it was either, it was delightful.
"How can they look always... perfect. Even when they stand up?"
A wide grin spread across his face and he opened his eyes to give her a playful look.
"Really?"
He moved only enough for her to sense that something was very much standing.
The reaction was acute.
Her bright red eyes darkened abruptly and greedily she pressed her lips to his.
How could he resist her? Hungrily he devoured her with his lips, eyes and hands.
The skin under his fingers was soft and smooth, but no matter how often his hands brushed against her thigh, it was never enough.
His back was pressed into the chair and he could feel her desperate attempt to restrain herself.
He wished she didn't have to do it, he wished she could live it up, savor it, and not have to take him into consideration.
But after the previous time, he was still glad she did. His shoulder still ached from her lust-filled grip and the sadness that sparkled from her eyes when he asked her to stop tore at his heart.
The sun had set now and the sky was bathed in a riot of color, not that he paid much attention to the spectacle, preferring to give his attention to the wonder on his lap.
Her hand wandered to her center and he heard the unmistakable sound of clothes ripping. Alice would not be pleased, but who was thinking about Alice right now.
His hips thrust up impatiently and Lily let out a low cry. His nerve endings burned and there was only one word in his mind.
More.
He wanted more, more of her, more of this, more of everything.
At least they were alone, though Carlisle couldn't say it would have stopped him. Maybe a little.
But probably not.
The first rays of sunlight were already showing, tentatively, as if they were already expecting to be surrounded by a dark blanket of clouds.
But not today.
Today the weather was going to be on its best behavior, Alice made sure of that.
Much more she set the day and Carlisle thought that she had certainly sent a threat to the cloud cover, should she not keep her promise.
His room was always more dark than light, not that it would make any difference to either of them.
His fingers automatically found their way to her cheek. He traced the delicate line, the cheeks had lost the rosy tone and now showed a noble pallor. It did not make her less beautiful; on the contrary, the pallor more than suited her. But it made it more difficult for Carlisle to read her. It used to be easier, her heartbeat racing, her breath coming in bursts and her cheeks flushing.
Now he had to interpret what he was getting and hope for the best.
Fingertips wandered to her lips, still red and plump. Like a rose before blooming, inviting and promising. He knew what those lips could do, and he also knew if he thought about it too long, they wouldn't get to help Alice decorate the house.
Finally, he decided to move to safer ground, his movements traced by her red eyes.
They were not pure red.
They carried with them a whole palette of colors and Carlisle could still see faint traces of the deep and unique blue-green in them.
Maybe it was just imagination but he was sure it was there. The red had nothing in common with the cruel red of the others, it carried nothing animalistic or murderous in it. It was noble, it was strong, it was beautiful.
Like a sunrise that made the first clouds shine in this color.
He held her hand in both of his, on the one hand to feel more of her and on the other to not even give himself the chance to wander again.
His thumb ran along the knuckles, tracing the fine lines of her palm, studying every hill and notch. Never in his existence had he wanted to know someone so closely. He wanted to absorb, observe, memorize every little thing about her, every change, every innovation, every commonality with her human existence.
This fact puzzled him over and over again. It was almost absurd how fascinated he was with her then and still was.
No matter how hard he forced himself, he couldn't regret her transformation. Even if it probably made him go straight to hell.
He regretted her pain, the involuntariness, the rawness with which it happened. He regretted that it hadn't been him, maybe he could have spared her at least a little of the agony. The very idea was actually absurd. Riley had bitten her in the neck, the poison had spread directly into her blood and gone on a direct path to her heart. There was hardly a faster way.
Still, he regretted it.
But he didn't regret that she was like him.
He couldn't.
How could he?
It meant that, should she want it, he could spend eternity with her. It meant that she was safe, at least for the most part.
At least her power ensured that, or would once she gained control of it.
Carlisle had seen nothing like it in his travels through the history of the world. Nothing that contained the same destructive power, nothing that was so uncontrollable. He could not and would not compare it to Jane's power.
Jane created an illusion of pain, much like Jasper could affect and enhance emotions.
But Lily wasn't creating an illusion.
She was actually destroying these things.
He couldn't lie, it was terrifying and he tried to pull himself together as best he could. The last thing he wanted was for her to think he was afraid of her. Which wasn't true. He knew she would never harm him - intentionally.
But unfortunately, her power didn't quite adhere to intentionality.
After all, she couldn't read minds, she would probably run away if she heard that his thoughts revolved almost exclusively around her and were often, actually most of the time, not PG13.
No, he could not regret her new existence.
It wouldn't be long before she was ready to live among humans, to embrace her new life.
They would move and they would make up another story, one in which she could be his wife, should she agree to it.
The notion stirred deep feelings in Carlisle.
As a devout Christian, while not in tune with all the views of the church, he believed in marriage and the idea of finally finding someone who would stay by his side to the end, before God and the world, was something he had never dared to hope for.