DIAMOND

"I really hope your Hero Ability isn't getting even harder than normal. That's too easy to make jokes with."

"Well, that was my plan, but when I was trying to get even harder, I asked myself, what's the hardest thing in the universe? Then it hit me - diamonds."

"Well, you're not wrong, exactly, but-"

"But what? Diamond is at the top of the hardness scale. Harder than steel, my dude."

"That only refers to cutting, diamonds can be smashed very easily."

"Then why would they call it hardness and not uncuttability?"

Aizawa pinched the bridge of his nose. "So, you were trying to get hard-"

"Right. And then this happened."

Kirishima clenched his fist and made a loud grunting noise. Aizawa awkwardly looked away and said, "Look, this is already awkward, maybe we can help you find- uh, Kirishima?"

"Is it working yet?"

"Does your definition of 'working' involve a giant blue man floating behind you?"

"Crazy, right?" Kirishima said. "He's good at punching things, and I'm good at taking punches, so we're like the perfect bro team. I call it, Diamond is Unbreakable!"

"It's really not."

"So, do I pass?"

"You would have, but there's just one small problem."

"Is it the name? I could name it something manlier."

"No, see, you thought I was your homeroom teacher," Aizawa tore off his mask, revealing an entirely different face underneath, "But it was me, Dio!"

"Who?"

"And once I've drained the blood of every person here and internalized the power of your 'Quirks', I will be unstoppable!"

"What about unbreakable?"

"Yes, that too. Now, prepare to die!"

Dio lunged forward and jammed his nails into Kirishima's hair. He yelped and pulled away his punctured hand.

"Even my hair is unbreakable!"

"Insolent whelp. Prepare to face the power of my stand. Za Warudo!"

Dio teleported behind Kirishima's back and stabbed him. Kirishima's skin held strong, and his Stand punched the vampire away.

"Your armor is impressive," Dio said, "But surely you must have a weak spot."

"You wish, dude! I'm hard as diamonds everywhere! Even between my legs!"

"I, uh, really didn't need to know that." Dio coughed and said, "Yes, well, are your eyeballs as hard as everything else? Za Warudo!"

Dio ran forward, only to stop when he saw Crazy Diamond move. "What? Impossible! How are you still moving?"

"With my legs, man."

"No, you idiot. I stopped time. Why aren't you-"

A capture scarf wrapped up the vampire. Aizawa held his scarf in one hand and a flamethrower in the other. "That is quite enough. Kirishima, you pass."

"Sweet!"

"Insolent human!" Dio shouted. "When I get out of this, I'm going to-"

Dio's threat got cut off by unearthly shrieking as Aizawa lit him on fire. After seconds, all that remained of the vampire was a pile of ash on the ground.

Aizawa told his flamethrower, "Thanks for the assist, Midoriya."

"You are welcome, sensei. I can toast your marshmallows and your enemies to perfection."

497

And then they all had smores.