(AN: let me know how you are enjoying the story, now that things have changed a little! As always, I don't own these characters. I'm just filling in the blanks. Don't forget to subscribe for updates.)
As August turned to September, Tonks couldn't help but still feel just as miserable as she had two months before. Meanwhile, the aurors and The Order were keeping her busy round the clock.
She had been stationed in Hogsmeade for several weeks and would have to stay there through Christmas at least. The only good thing about this was when she wasn't on duty at night she could disapperate directly home to her flat.
Which had deteriorated quite a bit in recent weeks. She just didn't have the time or energy anymore.
One night, a few days before the new term at Hogwarts would start. Tonks found herself stuck with two other aurors inside the Three Broomsticks. Dawlish and Savage were two of the most boring people on the planet, Tonks was almost certain. It also didn't help that they were both about 20 years older than her. This left very little to chat about.
Tonks was quietly relieved when the pair mentioned that they were going on guard duty outside, and wouldn't be back for an hour or so. As always they left Tonks behind to keep an eye on the three Broomsticks and the traffic in and out of the pub.
Tonks lingered near the front door, looking out into the dark streets of Hogsmeade. The night was uncommonly bright, and Tonks realized that it was the full moon. She couldn't help but worry for Remus, and she caught herself wondering where he was, and how he was doing. It would be his first transformation with the other werewolves, Tonks hoped he'd be okay.
After awhile, Tonks retreated to the bar, she figured busying herself with paperwork might help keep her mind off things. She couldn't help but accept when Rosmerta offered her a tonic.
Tonks put some finishing touches onto her paperwork when someone broke her concentration.
"Nymphadora." She heard the person she wanted to speak with the least, say.
She sighed, of course Dumbledore had to be here. She partly blamed him for Remus leaving, and she didn't want to appear to be angry with him. It wasn't good manners.
She turned, and gave Dumbledore the most civil expression that she could muster.
"Oh, Hello Professor." Tonks said briefly, before pretending to return to her clearly finished report.
"Good evening, how are you this fine night?" Dumbledore said, jovially.
"Very busy." Tonks said. Hoping she sounded nice enough. Before returning to look over her clearly finished report.
She hoped her old Headmaster wouldn't notice this.
After a few seconds, Dumbledore spoke again.
"I'm surprised to see the bar so empty on such a nice evening." Dumbledore explained, fondly.
"Mmh. Maybe they are busy doing other things." Tonks said, colder than she had intended.
Dumbledore looked at her slightly surprised at her tone.
And looked at her for awhile before speaking.
"How are you really doing?" Dumbledore asked, observing her.
"I told you, just very busy. Alls fine." Tonks said, curtly.
"Forgive me Nymphadora, but that doesn't seem to be all that true."
Tonks sighed, closing her eyes.
She looked up at Dumbledore. "Everything is fine."
"Is that why you keep pretending to work on a finished report? Why do you wish to ignore me, Nymphadora."
At this, Tonks saw red. everyone always jumped through hoops to make him happy, and here he was complaining she wasn't giving him enough attention.
"I'm sorry. I wasn't aware I was supposed to talk to you." Tonks said plainly.
"Well, that is what one typically does in polite conversation." Dumbledore mused.
"Sorry." She said. Not sure what else to say.
Dumbledore looked at her again.
"Are you angry with me, Nymphadora ?"
Tonks banged her hand on the bar. He clearly didn't know when he wasn't wanted, or else he didn't care.
"Yes. I'm mad. Let's just leave it." Tonks told him, with anger in her voice.
"Oh, well I can't do that. If I've done something to upset you I want to rectify it."
Tonks sighed, he really couldn't rectify what had happened. What was done, was done.
"What's done, is done." She said curtly.
"Well, clearly not if your still so upset with me." Dumbledore told her swiftly.
Tonks was steaming. If she could change her appearance her hair would surly be fiery red. But she couldn't. It had been extremely frustrating and had been happening for most of the summer. Before sometimes her appearance would change independently and now she couldn't even change it if she had wanted to. One of her biggest asset, gone. This had certainly not gone unnoticed despite her best efforts to hide it.
"I -I don't understand." Tonks said, coldly.
"You don't understand what?" Dumbledore asked her gently as if she was a child.
And, then Tonks was on her feet. Prepared to yell at Dumbledore.
"I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY -" she started to yell but couldn't bring herself to scream at him.
"I don't understand why you would let Remus go off on such a dangerous mission, just a few weeks after his best friend died. He's not thinking clearly and you just let him leave with no questions? As long as he was doing what you needed it didn't matter though, right." Tonks blurted out, her voice breaking.
Tonks realized tears were streaming down her face, silently. she was so angry she had practically burst into tears.
Dumbledore stared at her dumbfounded. In total shock at her outburst.
"I-I was not aware that you knew of Remus' mission." Dumbledore said sternly, but curious.
"Yeah, I know." To keep said.
"Ahh, I see." He said, calmly.
"So you think I allowed Remus to go on a dangerous mission, when he wasn't fit to do so? You believe that little of me, Nymphadora?"
Tonks looked at him out of the corner of her eye.
"I don't know what I think." Tonks grumbled.
"Well, I can assure you that I would never send someone off on any type of mission without making sure that they knew exactly what they were signing up for, and I can also promise that I'd never let someone do something dangerous out of anger or grief." Dumbledore explained.
"His best friend had just died. Of course he wasn't in his right mind." Tonks murmured sadly.
"And, Remus ensured me that he was in his right mind. And, I believed him...Perhaps I should not have." Dumbledore said, gravely.
Tonks wiped her face rapidly. Aurors didn't cry.
"Well, we will have to agree to disagree. I suppose." Tonks said. Dumbledore just looked at her for several seconds. She wondered briefly if he had been lost for words, but the appearance of a large silver goose next to them startled her.
"We are coming back, alls quiet out here." The voice of Savage boomed throughout the bar, before disappearing.
Tonks silently waved her wand and a huge large figure shot out of it. It was a wolf. Tonks tried to not act shocked but she was. Her patronous had always taken the form of a rabbit before.
Dumbledore looked at her, mouth slightly open, and a look of complete surprise etched on his face.
"You love him." Dumbledore said. It wasn't a question. Clearly believing her worry up to that point to be of platonic variety.
"Yes." Tonks said curtly. Lips pressed hard together, trying to contain herself.
"Ah, star crossed lovers." Dumbledore murmured, almost nostalgically.
Tonks shrugged. Not sure what to say.
Dumbledore gave her a look of pity that made her blood boil.
"So this is why you're so angry with me? Why ... you're no longer colorful." Dumbledore lamented, observing her.
Tonks nodded.
"Ahh, well I understand. You feel as though I've pushed away someone you care for very deeply."
"He did that himself, you just let him." She said quietly, resentfully.
"Well, I'd completely understand if you didn't want to help me anymore then." Dumbledore told her.
"I didn't say I wouldn't help you...I'm still a member of the Order. It's my job to help." Tonks said, almost annoyed.
"Only if you still want to." He mused.
"Of course I'll help." Tonks said.
"Well, would it be okay if i might need your help tomorrow?" He asked.
Tonks looked at him expectantly. She nodded.
Dumbledore looked at her happily. "Perfect. I just need someone to make sure Harry makes it safely off the train tomorrow, and up to the castle."
"I can do that." Tonks said curtly.
"Thank you. Nymphadora." Dumbledore said politely. "And If I may say, I believe you and Remus will find each other again. Just give it time" he told her.
Tonks nodded, before Dumbledore got up to leave.
"Sir." Tonks called after him as he made to leave.
Dumbledore looked back at her.
"Please don't tell anyone." Tonks said, feeling vulnerable.
"Do not worry. The tale isn't mine to tell. But, Feel free to stop by to see me anytime. I just adore a good love story" Dumbledore told her, jovially.
Tonks nodded, slightly amused by her old headmaster, and then turned back to her paperwork.
"Oh Nymphadora! Harry has an invisibility cloak, so he may be difficult to locate." He explained.
"Oh, okay." Tonks said.
And, then Dumbledore strode away from the pub.