Chapter 50

Christmas.

It was the first time my apartment was undecorated for Christmas, and I had absolutely no desire to celebrate. Seiya's strange box was still locked on my bedside table. I had already tried to open it with a credit card, a hairpin, and a paperclip, but without success. Searching for the key in his office felt like looking for a needle in a haystack.

His funeral was scheduled for December 29th. Five more days. I picked up the box for the thousandth time and shook it. There was something inside, something for me. But I didn't want to damage the box.

Taiki would come over for breakfast to talk with me, and tonight Mamoru and I were invited to dinner at Motoki and Makoto's place. They didn't want us to be lonely after our heavy blows of fate. So I forced myself to leave the warm bed because I didn't want to face Taiki in my nightgown. I glanced into the refrigerator, which was eerily empty. Only two kinds of sausage, a meager bit of cheese, and some butter remained. I should have motivated myself to go shopping yesterday. In the pantry, I found a jar of jam and some chocolate spread. At least something.

Hardly had I finished my improvised breakfast when the doorbell rang, and I opened it with a tired smile to welcome Taiki. He entered the apartment. "Usagi, is everything alright?" Taiki asked with concern. I sighed softly and confessed the truth to him: "It's Christmas, but I simply don't have the desire or energy to decorate or be in a festive mood."

I led him to the living room and asked him to take a seat. Taiki handed me a bag with fresh rolls, and as I walked into the kitchen to get a basket and fill it with the fragrant rolls, I placed Taiki's coffee next to it, black just like Seiya used to drink it. Finally, I took my seat and tried to maintain a certain sense of normalcy.

"Usagi, I feel like you're hiding something from me," Taiki said eventually, taking a cautious sip of his coffee. His gaze was attentive, as if he wanted to see through my facade. Great, Taiki went straight to the point and demanded honest answers from me. It was complicated, and I felt uncomfortable about revealing the truth. Taiki's calm gaze rested on me, and I knew I couldn't avoid it any longer. I cut open the roll, desperately trying to figure out how to put my thoughts into words. What exactly was he getting at?

"Usagi, please be honest," Taiki urged further. "I've thought about it over and over again. I need to know exactly what happened with Seiya. Why did Saphir think you were together with his brother when he was just a business partner? I won't blame you, but I need to know."

A dull feeling spread in my stomach. I had almost suspected it. I lowered my gaze slightly in embarrassment. "You're right, Diamond was not just a business partner or friend... it was more of an affair," I finally confessed. My pulse quickened as I waited for Taiki's reaction. His grip on his knife tightened, and I felt the tension in the air.

"Did Seiya know about him?" Taiki asked dryly. I shook my head. "Did you end it?" "Yes." "When?" "When Seiya stayed with you. From then on, there was only him for me. Believe me, I did love your brother, truly, and I miss him every second."

Taiki fell silent and took another sip of coffee. "He loved you, more than anything," Taiki said eventually.

"I know," I replied softly, my heart heavy.

At least Taiki kept his promise and didn't blame me, but my confession hung heavily between us.

Then Taiki pulled out his bag and rummaged inside. Eventually, he pulled out something small - a golden key. I knew immediately what this key belonged to. I could have searched for it forever.

"I don't know what it's for, but Seiya gave it to me during our last tour," Taiki explained. "He said he would pick it up again on Christmas because he hid your Christmas present with it."

I hesitated and took the key from Taiki, turning it between my fingers. It weighed only a few grams, but it felt heavy as lead in my hand.

"I know what it's for," I whispered softly. It was a Christmas present from Seiya, and only he could still send me a gift from the heavens. A warm smile formed on my lips, and I stood up for a moment to bring the wooden box from the bedroom. I felt a mixture of anticipation and sadness as I held the box in my hands.

I placed the box on the table, and Taiki chuckled when he saw the green note. "He probably expected you to find it and wanted to tease you until Christmas," he remarked amusedly.

"Yes, that sounds like him, and honestly, I spent the last few days searching in his office for the key."

Now I was curious if the small key would actually fit. I inserted it into the lock and turned it carefully. With a soft click, the lock opened, and I felt a nervous tension inside me. I looked over to Taiki, who nodded encouragingly.

Slowly, I lifted the lid of the box. On top was a note that read: "For tonight."

I became suspicious and handed the note to Taiki.

"Do you know what he meant by that?" I asked him curiously.

"Unfortunately, no," Taiki replied regretfully. "You know Seiya, he probably had something extraordinary planned again. But exactly what, I can't say. We were supposed to be at a performance tonight."

The box was filled to the top with newspaper clippings, which explained why I hadn't heard much noise when shaking it. I carelessly threw the scraps of paper onto the floor; I would clean up later. Now, I wanted to know what was hidden in this box. In the middle, I came across another box and opened it with anticipation.

I'm not sure what I had expected, but when the delicate gold necklace with the matching bracelet shimmered at me, a small disappointment crept in. Not because they were ugly - quite the contrary, they were truly enchanting. But jewelry? Seiya, who always had the most unconventional and unique ideas for gifts, had never given me jewelry before, at least not to my knowledge.

Disappointed, I looked at the jewelry in my hands. It was undoubtedly beautiful, but coming from Seiya, who always gave me the most extraordinary gifts, the simple jewelry suddenly seemed unexpectedly normal. I sighed softly and placed the gold necklace and bracelet on the table.

"What's wrong?" Mamoru asked, noticing my disappointment. "I don't know," I replied. "I just expected something else." I pushed the box aside and diverted my gaze from the jewelry.

Mamoru also looked into the box, and suddenly, his eyes widened. "Wait a minute, there's something else," he said excitedly, digging into the newspaper clippings. Eventually, he pulled out a small, simple golden ring.

The surface was smooth and flawless, and Taiki read the engraving aloud: "Endless love!" An intense shiver ran through my body as I held the ring in my hands. Tears welled up in my eyes as I looked at the ring. It was as if Seiya was confessing his love to me from afar. All the disappointment faded away, and a wave of emotional joy filled me.

We sat together in silence for a while, each immersed in our own thoughts and memories. "It's time for me to go, Usagi. But if you need someone to talk to or cry with, I'm here for you. You're not alone."

I nodded, grateful for his support and at the same time surprised that he said such things even though he now knew the truth. "Thank you, Taiki. You have no idea how much that means to me." He gently placed his hand on my shoulder. "I know it's not easy, but you'll make it." With these words, he said goodbye.

I sat back in my chair and thoughtfully stroked the pieces of jewelry. "I will always carry you in my heart, Seiya," I whispered into the silence. "You were a gift in my life, and I will carry your love with me forever." With this certainty, I felt strengthened to face the upcoming challenges. It was time to say goodbye to Seiya and find my own path to move forward and live my life the way he would have wanted. I carefully put the ring on my finger, feeling a warmth and connection that filled me.

So, I kicked myself into gear. Surveyed the chaos that had gradually taken over the apartment and decided that from today on, I would organize my life again. It was time to bring order to my thoughts and my home, to make a fresh start.

I tied my hair back, rolled up my sleeves, turned the music up, and started cleaning with full energy. Every movement was a small step towards an ordered life. I let the music drive me, forgetting for a moment all the sorrow and confusion that had accompanied me in the last few days.

Only when it began to get dark outside did I realize how late it was. Damn, Mamoru would pick me up soon, and as soon as I had that thought, the doorbell rang. I whirled into the bedroom and quickly grabbed my dress, pressed the intercom as I passed it, leaned the door against the frame, and disappeared into the bathroom.

"Bunny? Are you ready? We have to leave," his familiar voice reached me from outside.

"I'll be there in five uh... ten minutes," I called back and could already imagine his slightly annoyed expression. Yes, some things would probably never change. But I also knew that despite it all, he would still wait for me.

I really tried to hurry, but I knew that Mamoru was not Diamond and therefore much more patient.

I ran my fingers through my dark blue dress, put on Seiya's necklace and bracelet, and took one last look in the mirror. As I looked at my reflection, I felt a connection to Seiya through the jewelry. It was as if he would be with me tonight. Although I wasn't sure what occasion the jewelry was meant for, I wanted to fulfill his wish and wear them tonight.

"Usako, I've been standing here for fifteen minutes already," he grumbled from outside before I finally opened the door and stepped into the hallway with Mamoru.

He stared at me with his mouth open. The fact that I had actually dressed up seemed to throw him off guard. In the past two weeks, I had almost exclusively worn Seiya's clothes or loose, comfortable outfits.

"Is something wrong? Or can we go now?" I asked, trying to snap him out of his stupor.

He finally closed his mouth. "You... you look good," he stammered, embarrassed, and handed me my coat. Despite the cold, we decided to walk. Since I was wearing high heels again, I linked my arm with Mamoru's for safety. We chatted about superficial topics, but I noticed that he deliberately avoided the subject of Seiya.

It had been a long time since I was at Motoki's home. In my eyes, he practically lived in the Crown, as he spent the majority of his time there. I looked up in the stairwell; the elevator was still not working. "Which floor do we need to go to?" "The third. You'll manage."

Finally, we arrived on the top floor, and Mamoru rang the bell. It took quite a while before Motoki, breathing heavily, opened the door for us. "What's going on?" Mamoru asked curiously. "Mako's going crazy in the kitchen," Motoki replied directly. "Luckily, you're here now, maybe it will calm her down a bit. I hope you brought a good appetite with you."