A. N. : Ah, the sweet feeling of writing Jet, I had missed the suffering. (I always think of great ideas for these notes but then I forget them when the times comes to write them...)

Jet is angry.

Worse, he's angry with himself, which – okay it happens kind of often actually, but that doesn't mean he likes the feeling.

As if the sea sickness wasn't bad enough.

Worst of all though, is that he isn't angry for any good reason – he didn't get any of his kids hurt or killed, The Duke is fine, Katara talks to him and hasn't frozen him to anything recently, the Water Tribe guys look at him like an equal, like they should, everything is as fine as can be on a stupid Fire Nation ship that has him throwing up every hour or so.

No, he's angry because of Li – no, not Li shit, why can't he get through that thick skull of his that the asshole prince isn't Li –

Okay maybe he's actually not really an asshole, but still.

Pretending everything is fine was good for a while – it was great, spending time with The Duke, catching up on everything he missed since they parted ways – since they left him – but then it wasn't and people talked like not-Li was capable of doing such horrible – have you even looked at the guy, he can't even talk about it –

And no one stood up for him apart from Toph – he didn't stand up for him and he's really like Toph said, like a stupid airbender – he's not really sure what an airbender is like, but if they were all like Aang, all no I don't want to fight then yeah, Jet is a fucking airbender who can't stand up for anything and keeps running away all the time.

And it's stupid, he shouldn't care for not-Li's hurt feelings, but he does, because even if that guy isn't Li, even if Li never even existed, Jet can't deny anymore that there was a link – there is a link – between them. He needed Li and he still does.

That doesn't mean he has to like it though, because he doesn't – there is no fucking way he can be okay with knowing the one person who can understand him is the spirits damned Fire Prince –

It would be worse if it wasn't Li though – not Li, damn it –

Ugh. Maybe now would be the right time to gather all his courage and go talk with not-Li and maybe punch him in the nose a few times and then figure out what to do exactly with this shit situation.

He's not calling not-Li his friend anytime soon though – he can't trust him that way again, not after he was betrayed and hurt by that filthy liar, that firebending scum –

Breathe.

Jet knows he is unstable when he's angry, and that's a problem. Especially on a ship where there is close to no privacy, no place to have a breakdown in peace. Also a problem.

Not-Li is a problem and Jet needs to solve it soon.

Except he can't fucking seem to move his legs and go talk to not-Li about how he's a pain in the ass but since killing each other now wouldn't be a good idea, they might as well try to work something out in a more or less peaceful fashion.

Not that Jet could actually kill him, but that's another matter entirely.

He sighs. He doesn't even know where not-Li is – and why doesn't he know by the way, when has he stopped making sure not-Li is always in his line of sight, where he can't do anything funny without Jet noticing immediately, when has Jet stopped distrusting him entirely ?

Jet loses control on his life a bit too often to his liking these days and that's just another problem.

Talamak, the guy Toph stuck in a closet because he was the only one to have the guts to insult not-Li to his face – and if it wasn't about that, Jet would probably pat him on the back because damn, that's some courage – tells Jet to hide, there's a Fire Nation ship nearby and since he isn't disguised –

Jet grits his teeth. He hates being put aside, hates doing nothing, but wearing a Fire Nation uniform is beyond his strength, so there's really nothing he can do apart from bearing it.

Well, at least now he'll know where not-Li is – he always gets called on the deck when something like that happens, to help Hakoda pass for an actual Fire Navy captain.

He hates that too, seeing not-Li in full Fire Nation soldier getup, skull helmet and all, looking like the fucking monster Jet knows – hopes – he isn't.

Jet stays in the staircase while Hakoda, Bato and not-Li greet the Fire Nation soldiers – and fuck, he wants to kill these son of bitches, wants to make them pay for his parents, for his kids, for everything and this is why he never watches usually, never looks at the scum that is somehow allowed to live when it would be so easy to just –

Breathe. The scum is leaving and he has something to do.

Not-Li comes down and Jet really wants to tear that fucking disgusting mask off his face and crush it – but not-Li takes it off on his own and looks at him like he's surprised Jet is here. He probably is – Jet has been avoiding him just as much as he's been avoiding looking at the scum that sometimes gets on the ship.

And Jet is going to do this, he will talk to not-Li and maybe kick his ass too and –

And not-Li is looking at him, eyes sad and scared, and Jet probably looks like that right now too, just angry too, and it hurts, seeing himself in the Fire Prince, but this is Li, so why is he even surprised ?

And who cares that Li doesn't actually exist, really.