A/N Wow! Sarah blackmails Casey, then Beckman piles it on. Someone tries to murder him. He's thrown into the leadership role for an entire battle group and now he has to deal with Bartowski's lady feelings. All while trying to figure out who's behind the whole mess and he can't even smoke a damn cigar. Not to mention the nearest Johnny Walker bottle is miles away. Sheesh Is that anyway to treat a general?

A Heart Torn

A Charah Tale

By Lord Rapier

Edited and guided by CliffM

Chapter 6

Never Starts Now

Chuck is exhausted, an eight-hour flight halfway around the world. Followed by eighteen hours of hacking and writing code. Finally getting to his stateroom, he removes his shoes, climbs into his rack fully clothed and is asleep within minutes.

Fifteen minutes later outside Chuck's stateroom, "Echo four, the kill order on the blonde is rescinded. Keep an eye on her. She is not to approach the Colonel without my say so." Echo four responds, "Aye, aye Sir, I'll pass the word to the team.

Casey takes Sarah aside for a serious discussion. He chews on his unlit cigar, "Okay Walker, here's the shot you wanted. Open the emotional door and I'll see if I can get him to invite you in. Be patient go slow and be kind. Walker there are two things you need to know before I let you walk in that room."

Sarah nods, "I'm listening."

Casey takes a deep breath, "If you hurt that kid again, he'll be devastated. He will not recover."

Sarah looks up at Casey, "I swear John, I never wanted to hurt him…"

Casey waves his hand and interrupts her. "Walker look me in the eye." Sarah catches Casey's gaze, "If you hurt Chuck again and make me a part of it… your body will hit the ground before the sound of the shot hits your ears. Any questions?"

Sarah shakes her head, and turns reaching for the doorknob, "I hear you Casey. I believe you." Sarah opens the door and quietly enters the stateroom.

Chuck feels someone climb into the rack with him who says. "Hi Baby, I've really missed cuddling with you."

Chuck sleepily responds, "Sarah what are you doing here? I don't want to have this dream anymore."

Sarah strokes the back of his head, "What dream is that Sweetheart?"

Chuck tosses, uneasy, in the tight space, "The one where you say you love me, then break my heart and leave me. You always pick being a spy over being with me."

Chuck feels Sarah pull him closer, "Chuck, what if this time the dream ends differently?"

Chuck moans, "No, it always ends the same. You always leave me. You've left me hundreds of times. The dream is always the same, you always leave."

Sarah sobs, "Oh Baby, I'm so sorry I hurt you. I wish I could take it back, all of it. All the times I've hurt you, but I can't. I can only promise that I'll try to never do it again."

Chuck feels something wet on his neck and he reaches up to wipe it. His hand is damp. He opens his eyes and realizes this isn't a dream. He looks down and sees an arm over his chest. Looking over his shoulder he sees Sarah's face, her eyes red, swollen, and wet with tears. "What the fuck…," he shoves her hard and she rolls to the deck, surprised. He jumps out of the rack, pointing at her lying on the floor. "What the fuck are you doing here? What are you doing in my room? In my bed? Get out, get out now. There are supposed to be people protecting me from you."

Sarah stands up, holding her hands out, "Chuck please, can't we talk?"

Chuck's face is red as he screams, "You get out. Get out now. Get off this ship or I will."

The tears roll down Sarah's face, "Please Chuck let's just talk, just for a few minutes. You can give me that, can't you?"

Chuck screams at her, "You did all your talking the day you walked out on me. Right before we were supposed to get married and took half my heart with you. I'm not giving you anything. I offered you everything and you shit on it. You wanted to be a spy, go spy, somewhere else. Get out."

Sarah's head falls to her chest, "Fine you want me to go? Kiss me goodbye and I'll leave."

Chuck is fuming, "The only kissing that is going to happen here, is you kissing my ass before you walk out that door." Chuck turns his back to Sarah and crosses his arms.

Sarah pleads, "Please Chuck, one kiss, just one kiss. I'll transfer my shares of CI to you. I'll walk out that door and never bother you again." Chuck refuses to look at her as he shakes his head. Without turning around, he points at the door.

Sarah's shoulders slump, "Please Baby, I screwed up. I miss you so much. I think about you all day, every day. I just want one goodbye kiss. I never got a goodbye kiss."

Chuck keeps his back to her and points at the door, "That was your choice, you walked out on me."

Sarah's voice gets desperate, "Chuck I'm not leaving. Not until you kiss me goodbye."

Chuck shakes his head, his voice is hoarse and broken, "You already said goodbye to me. You have your spy life, it's what you wanted. Now go and let me be. I have work to do." Chuck is exhausted his head is swirling. Sarah can hear his sobs. "Please go, I can't do this. You left me. You all leave me to be spies. Please go."

Sarah steps around and gets in front of Chuck, he immediately turns away from her.

"Fine don't kiss me goodbye. Take me back. Get me pregnant and take me home."

Chuck's head pops up, "WHAT? What the hell is wrong with you? Just like that I'm supposed to have sex with you. It makes me nauseous to think of touching you. We both know you have to be on birth control. Who knows how many men you've seduced to do your job. Uhhhhhh, I can't stand the things you're making me think about. You were supposed to be mine. You promised you were going to be mine."

Sarah jumps in front of him again this time grabbing his shoulders so he can't turn away. "Look at me, I work in an office. Why would I be on birth control? I haven't let anyone touch me since I left Burbank. I don't want anyone else to touch me, ever. I kept my promise, I am yours."

Chuck's head is lowered his eyes closed as he gasps for air, "Please go, I can't breathe, please go."

Sarah tightens her grip on his shoulders, "Your choice. Kiss me goodbye, and I'll leave."

Chuck starts to shake, and his legs give out. He falls to his knees and wraps his arms around her, his cheek pressed against her stomach. Sobbing he pleads, "Please go. I can't stand this anymore. You're killing me, my heart is broken. If you really love me, please, I'm begging you, go."

Sarah gets down on her knees with him, "Choose Chuck what's it going to be? All you have to do to get rid of me for good is kiss me. One kiss and I am out of your life forever."

Chuck grabs her face, and presses his lips to hers, kissing her passionately, desperately, driving his tongue into her mouth. Sarah wraps her arms around him and responds, the kiss goes on for minutes. Chuck's mind is overwhelmed with the passion he feels for this woman. Then it hits him, and he pulls away. "You tore my heart. You shredded my heart." Chuck shakes his head, "You'll only love me until the next mission. You could have come back to Burbank anytime in the last two years. You didn't." Chuck's voice softens and he's sincere as he says, "Enjoy being a spy. I truly hope you're happy."

Sarah begins to sob, pleading, "Chuck please, I broke my heart too. I love you. Please don't send me away. I can't be happy without you, I'm miserable. I was afraid to come back. I know I hurt you. I screwed up so bad. We were thrown together again for a reason."

Chuck continues to shake his head, "I'll have my lawyers contact you about the transfer of ownership."

Sarah speaks through her tears, "Fine. I'll transfer ownership, but I'm not leaving. I'm never leaving you again, not today, not tomorrow, never. I swear I'm yours forever. I'll never leave you. I swear. I'll spend every minute of my life proving I deserve this one last chance. Let me prove that you're a gift that I will cherish. I will make a home for you, have your children. We'll be a family. I promise I will make you happy. I swear I will never, ever leave you."

Chuck falls to the floor staring up at the pipes running across the overhead, tears rolling down the sides of his face. "Why are you doing this to me? All I ever did was love you. Why do you want to hurt me like this? It hurts so bad."

Sarah lies on the deck next to him, her head on his chest, "I don't want to hurt you Baby. I never wanted to hurt you. I was just a scared, stupid girl. I thought I wasn't good enough for you. I got scared that I couldn't make you happy, that you didn't need me. That the only thing I was good at was being a spy. I remember now, that without you I'm nothing but a spy. Please, please forgive me."

Chuck tries to get up, but he can't seem to gather the strength to do it, Sarah stands up and offers her hand, he smacks it away, "I don't want your help, I want you to go." Chuck is in a daze as he struggles to his feet, unsteady, Sarah steps in front of him and starts to unbutton his shirt, Chuck smacks her hand away again, "What are you doing? Get your hands off me. You lost the right to undress me."

Sarah smiles, "I know Baby, but you're exhausted. You need to get some rest. You're not done saving the world yet." She goes back to undressing him, opening his belt, and unzipping his pants.

Chuck pushes her hands away again, not quite as hard this time, "I hate you, Sarah Walker."

Sarah looks miserable as the words cut into her heart, "I know Sweetheart, almost as much as I hate you."

Chuck looks surprised, and he lifts her chin to look at her face, drunkenly he asks, "You hate me?"

Sarah smiles, "No Honey, not even a little." She finally gets his outer clothes off and leads him to his rack in his underwear. "Come on Chuck, you need to get some sleep."

Chuck sits down and swings his legs up onto the rack lying down, Sarah pushes him to rollover towards the bulkhead and climbs in behind him. Chuck asks, "What are you doing? You said you would leave if I kissed you."

Sarah wraps her arm around him and spoons in close, "I know sweetheart, I'm tired. Would it be okay if I leave after our nap?"

Chuck starts to drift off and sleepily says, "Okay, you can leave after our nap, I love you, Sarah."

Sarah smiles as she says, "I know Baby, almost as much as I love you. I meant it when I swore that I would never leave you, never starts now." For the first time, in a long time, Sarah Lisa Walker feels okay, and falls asleep.

After a time, Chuck wakes up with his arms wrapped around Sarah, his head on her shoulder. He looks up and sees her face, sighs then closes his eyes and goes back to sleep.

Two hours after Sarah arrived there is a knock at the door, "Sir, General Casey asked us to wake you and requests that you meet him in the Captain's Mess after you freshen up." Sarah wakes up at the knocking, smiling when she sees that Chuck is holding her. She pulls him in tight sniffs his hair and kisses the top of his head.

Chuck is also roused from his sleep and stretches. Relaxing he snuggles back into Sarah's body, "I still hate you."

Sarah strokes the back of his head, "I know Baby. I don't blame you. What I did to you is awful. Do you think you'll ever forgive me?"

Chuck pulls her in close, "I don't know. You really hurt me. On the other hand, that's the best sleep I've had in years."

Sarah laughs, "So that's what you missed, using me as a pillow?"

Chuck nods his head against her chest, "That, and I'm really horny."

Sarah raises her head and looks at him, "Really, I would think the ladies would be all over you. Carina has had her eye on you for years."

Chuck pokes her in the side, "Shut up Walker. You're already on thin ice."

Sarah smiles as she pulls him in tight, "I'm not worried about falling in, as long I know you're here to save me. Chuck we still have work to do. Casey caught me up, but I have to know. Will you take me back?"

Chuck rolls away from Sarah, "You're right we have work to do. You need to go now."

Sarah is crestfallen, "But Chuck… "

Chuck rolls over her to stand on the deck, and pulls his pants on, "You got your goodbye kiss, you need to go now."

Sarah stands and walks to the door, "Chuck…" she opens the door and leaves, tears in her eyes.

Before the door shuts, Chuck hears a man scream "Freeze." He runs to the door. Sarah is standing with her hands up as two members of the Seal team hold their guns on her from a distance. Echo Four demands, "Ma'am you're in a restricted area, keep your hands where I can see them."

Chuck sighs, "Guys you're too close, she could have killed both of you before you knew what happened. What were General Casey's orders regarding the blonde woman?"

Four keeps his gun leveled at Sarah, "Sir he rescinded the kill order, but she's to be considered dangerous."

Chuck sighs, "Okay, good work. Let her go. Make sure she doesn't get near me again unless I say so. Not even the General can override, understood?"

Echo four holsters his gun, "Aye, aye Sir." He waves Sarah past him to the passageway. Sarah walks off slowly, looking back over her shoulder, but Chuck is gone.

Chuck goes back into his stateroom. Sitting down, he holds his head in his hands. "I'm gonna kill Casey. There's no way she got in here without his help." Grabbing his shaving kit, he makes his way to the head, his detail in front and behind him, to shower and shave, grumbling all the way. "A nuclear meltdown wasn't enough for him. He had to make me meltdown too. I'm going to break my rule, I'm gonna kill him."

Chuck walks into the head and finds Casey shaving at the sink. He moves over to the urinal to relieve himself. Casey wastes no time, "So are you going to use your hands, knife, gun?"

Chuck finishes up and moves over to the sink next to Casey. "None of the above. I'm going to make Morgan Head of Security. Then I'm going to hire Carina Miller and make her your boss. Then I'll find Ilse, hire her, and assign her to an unknown location. I'll give you daily updates on her. When you least expect it, I'm going to forgive you every day and remind you how you betrayed your best friend."

Casey nods as he continues shaving, "Oh good, I was worried you'd be pissed."

Chuck turns to Casey his face covered in shaving cream, "How could you do that? You told me you would keep her away from me." Chuck is sarcastic as he quotes Casey, "I have your back kid."

Casey wipes the last of the shaving cream from his face. "I do have your back kid. I always will. She fucked up, she got scared. Did you ever fuck up Chuck? Didn't she go nuts when you were wooing that deli girl. Did that hurt her? Let's not forget your bullshit remake of the Spy Who Loved Me, with that Roberts ho, who almost killed her. I don't suppose that hurt Walker either. She really screwed up when she went off mission to save your dumb ass and wound up in the hospital. Then wouldn't shoot because she was scared becauseshe might hit the dumbass she was in love with. She almost lost her job over that one. If you decide to bring up that whole Shaw stupidity, that's just what it was, stupidity. The two of you are immature idiots who don't know what's good for you. And before you open your mouth, who was banging that little number he met on the plane?

Wake up Bar… Carmichael you are never going to find another woman like her. You need her like you need the air you breathe. Stop being such a whiny little bitch and man up. She's miserable, just like you. You find a way to fix this and do it quick. I'm getting tired of holding your hand. If you ever accuse me of not having your back again… let's, just say it would be a bad idea."

Chuck slams his hand into the sink top, "Damn it, Casey don't you think I want to take her back? How am I supposed to trust her? She didn't just leave me, she left to be a spy. Why does this keep happening to me? Am I supposed to go through this every time she gets scared?"

Casey looks at Chuck, "Kid, you just flew an F-18 Super Hornet, landed it on a floating dot in the middle of the sea and didn't blink. You're in the process of dismantling a nuclear crisis, again. Not a drop of sweat. Yet you're standing here shivering in your boots because you're in love with a beautiful, intelligent woman, who loves you right back. Has it occurred to you, that the reason you're in so much pain, is not because she left, but because she's not with you? We need to get back to work. Set this aside for now. Trust me Chuck, she's not going anywhere, ever. She knows she screwed up. She's trying to make things right."

Casey gathers up his belongings, "Grab a shower. Wash that shit out of your ears and hear what she's been trying to tell you. You bought us some time, but we still have problems to deal with. Meet me in the Captain's Mess. She will be there, she's part of the team. We'll grab a bite and do an update with the Captain. Any questions Colonel? By the way, the Captain's middle name is Timothy."

Chuck's mouth falls open, "No shit, Captain James T. Kirk. No, no questions. Sorry, I know you have my back." Chuck starts to whine, "Why does she need to be there?

man, this really sucks. I don't want to see her again, it hurts."

As Casey walks out the door he speaks over his shoulder, "I know kid, there's only one way to fix this, I know it, she knows it, and so do you," Casey leaves the head.

Chuck shakes his head and looks into the mirror, "Bryce Larkin, this is all your fault." Finishing his shave, he hops in the shower thinking, how do these guys live like this. Two-minute showers, sleeping in tiny beds. When they get to sleep. The noise is constant, and the pay isn't even enough to properly support a family they barely get to see. We have got to do better by these people that sacrifice so much to protect us.

Then some ass has the balls to threaten to vaporize them, for money. I have to fix this. First, I have to get my mind straight, there's only one way to do that. Chuck sighs deeply as he washes the soap out of his hair. Crap, he was right, I was less scared flying that jet, that was actually fun, I might as well rip the band aid off. Another deep sigh as he dries himself off and heads back to the stateroom to dress.

Chuck approaches the Captains Mess preceded and followed by his security team. There is a Marine guard with a shotgun standing outside the door.

The Marine shouts, "Halt." Chuck puts his hands in the air.

Echo One talks to him, "That's Colonel Carmichael, I believe he's expected."

The Marine backs down, "Yes Sir, Sorry Sir."

Chuck opens the door to the Captain's Mess and puts his travel case on the deck near the door. Casey, the CO, The MAA, and the CAG are sitting at the table, with Sarah Walker. "Hello gentlemen, sorry to keep you waiting. Unfortunately, I am going to keep you waiting just a little longer. Agent Walker, can I see you in the passageway for a moment?"

Sarah can't hide the shock on her face as she stands up. She looks at Casey, he just shrugs. "Of course, Colonel I'm at your service." She walks to the door to meet Chuck. The pair step outside and allow the door to close.

Echo one, steps up, "Sir?"

Chuck waves him down, "It's cool, you don't need to keep her away any longer. Make sure your team knows, can you give us some privacy."

"Are you sure Sir?"

Chuck smiles at Sarah, "I'm sure. She's no longer a threat."

Echo One hesitates, "Sir, there's still the matter of your safety."

Chuck laughs, "Trust me One, no one can hurt me with her here. She protected me for years, and I'm still breathing. Wait around the corner, take the Sergeant with you."

One backs up, "Okay Colonel, we'll be within earshot. Just yell," Echo One and his teammate disappear around the corner with the Marine guard.

Once they're alone Chuck stares at Sarah his eyes burning into hers. His breathing hard and fast. His heart pounding in his chest.

Sarah is confused, "Is there a problem Colonel?" Without warning, Chuck takes her face in his hands and kisses her. Sarah breaks down and sobs right into his mouth. She wraps her arms around him and kisses him hard. When the kiss ends, she puts her head on his shoulder her body heaving as the tears flow.

Chuck holds her tight, "I'm still in a lot of pain, but I love you. I won't make a prisoner of you. I want to enjoy whatever time you give me."

Sarah shakes her head refusing to let go of him, "I'm never going to leave you again, I swear. I don't want anything else in this world but you. I'm sorry Baby, I'm so sorry."

Chuck holds her close, "Yeah well, I haven't exactly been perfect either. You need to get cleaned up. We'll talk later. I'll let them know you needed to use the head."

Sarah picks her head up and kisses him gently, "Thank you Chuck, I love you."

She walks down the passageway towards the head as Chuck calls out, "Echo you're back up." He opens the door and enters the Mess. Picking up his case he heads towards the table. "Sorry for the delay gentlemen. Agent Walker went to use the head. She should be here shortly."

Chuck sits down at the table and is immediately greeted by applause as everyone at the table rises. Chuck is freaked out and doesn't know what to say. Sarah walks in and sees what's going on. She comes up behind Chuck, bends and kisses him on the cheek. She whispers in his ear, "You deserve this, you're still the best." She adds her applause to the rest. Sarah remains standing behind Chuck.

The applause dies down and the CO raises a glass of bug juice (Navy Kool aid). The rest of the people at the table raise their glasses as well. Sarah places her hand on his shoulder. "To Colonel Carmichael… Batman, thank you Sir for saving my ship, my crew and Europe. We are in your debt." He turns to his left, "Senior Chief let's get this man fed, he must be starving."

The Senior Chief disappears into the Galley and returns with two large veggie pizzas, no olives, and places them on the table. He goes back into the Galley and comes out with three large bowls, one filled with Chinese dumplings, another with Sizzling Shrimp and one with tamales. Kirk waves at the food, "I was told that these are some of your favorites Chuck. I hope you like them. The Senior Chief made them just for you." As Chuck is stuffing a tamale in his mouth, he nods his head. The men at the table laugh.

Sarah is nibbling on a piece of pizza, "Thank you Senior Chief, this is my favorite. You did a great job the crust is perfect." Chuck is taking a drink of bug juice. Between bites Sarah leans over and whispers in his ear. "I don't want to rush you Hon, but as soon as you finish saving the world we're going into your stateroom. We're going to make up for two years of celibacy. Baby, I'm gonna make you scream."

At Sarah's words he starts to choke, and the red fluid shoots out of his nose and mouth. Sarah sits back with a big grin on her face and the rest of the men at the table just stare. They look at Sarah's face and Chuck coughing as Casey pounds him on the back and hands him a napkin, and they all start laughing.

Captain Kirk raises his glass again, "To cleaning up messes. Agent Walker, please refrain from choking my cyber expert until he's done with his work. To General Casey and his super team, thank you. Gentlemen, Agent Walker. Eat up, we still have a plan to work out. I don't want my ship damaged, and I want the bastards who did all this brought to justice."

As the table prepares to put their heads together to defeat the threat to the Ford and surrounding countries, Sarah Walker peels a Sizzling Shrimp and feeds it to Chuck. "Don't worry Captain, you have the best of the best on your side. Batman will kick the villain's ass. He always does."

A/N Looks like Charah is whole again. The Senior Chief makes good pizza and Chuck saved the day. I guess a little clean up and the team can head home. WRONG! We've only just begun. Stay tuned for more; Same Bat Channel, Same Bat Time. Okay there's no channel and the time is when I wake up. So just standby there's more coming.