Chapter 3 - No Way Home

Author's Note: It gets worse before it gets better.

Warnings: Abusive relationships though maybe a tiny bit better than before, and attempted suicide

~ Tirana Sorki

He knew returning to the Temple would be painful, but this is more than he expected. He remembers with glaring clarity when he was last here with Yoda and saw this place in ruins, with the blaster marks marring the walls and the bodies everywhere. The remains of what he once considered his family.

That was only ever Anakin though. Anakin was his brother and his son; Anakin meant everything to him, and that didn't stop him from betraying him. Seeing this stokes his still simmering anger, but he tamps down on it. It's not what Anakin needs to see right now.

Obi-Wan doesn't know why he expected Anakin's quarters to be any different than this. They're small, all things considered, though certainly no smaller than what they used to have. The mechanical chaos everywhere is the telltale markings of how this is Anakin, though it feels so much darker than it used to be. Obi-Wan also has the strong suspicion that these machine parts serve a very different purpose. He has a bacta tank, of course, and that's about it.

"Do you even sleep?" he finds himself asking incredulously, if only to distract himself from the emotions crushing him.

"On occasion," he answers, which is not at all reassuring.

Shoved off in a far corner, mostly concealed from sight, is... it's more the faint lingering traces of how Anakin once felt in the Force that draws him to it. They're his robes. And... "Your robes were never that light," he says, before it finally dawns on him.

Yes. Of course.

"Those are mine, aren't they?" Perhaps, in truth, Anakin missed Obi-Wan as much as Obi-Wan did him.

Anakin shifts slightly, looking away. He's not really looking at anything, actually. "Yes."

He wishes he understood Anakin better. In truth, he doesn't and never has, for all that he has tried. It's oddly touching to see that – even after everything – there is still a part of Anakin that cares for him – for them.

He glances up at him, and their height difference catches him off-guard – he's been with Anakin for almost a full day (it's surreal to be with him again), and Obi-Wan still hasn't adjusted to his new height. Sidious must have done it, because he never used to be this tall. (Technically, a little voice in his mind reminds, you did it.)

And again, Obi-Wan finds himself opting not to mention it, because he doesn't know how to approach it.

Obi-Wan considers it for a moment, before unclipping Anakin's lightsaber from his belt, holding it out to him. "I believe I can trust you with this," he says, evenly.

He looks down at it, almost uncertainly. "I serve only you, Master."

"You are not serving me, Anakin. You're my apprentice. There's a difference." What has Sidious taught him? Other than to be his slave?

"The apprentice does all that the master wills," he replies – repeating what he's been told, over and over.

"Perhaps, but my role is to teach you. A Sith apprentice may different than a padawan, but it's not..." he sighs, quietly. "We can discuss this another time. Here."

Anakin takes the lightsaber, returning it to its place on his belt.

"You should go," he says, gently. It's not easy, but he can tell how being here is hurting Anakin as well.

"Yes," Anakin replies, bowing. He did that to the Council, but this is not... It's not how it should be. They are family. Obi-Wan may be his master, but this absolute submissiveness is highly unsettling.

He watches Anakin go in silence. Now it's time for them to wait, which he has no problem doing. He suspects, somehow, that they will be discovered, but it's not a serious concern. Not when he has Anakin here. Everything is easier when they're together. He learned that a long time ago.

There is nothing for him to do, except meditate, which he does – drawing the Force around him. It's so easy to feel the Dark Side when he's looking at what was once his home, even knowing the Jedi were meant to fall. Their time was over, and a new era began. It was meant to happen – but it still angers him.

He doesn't fault Anakin for that. For betraying him, yes, but it was the Jedi's doing more than Anakin's – and Sidious as much as both of theirs. Sidious is dead now.

He reaches for Anakin, for what he now knows is his presence, for the dark, violent storm that he is in the Force instead of the brilliant star he once was. Slowly, hesitantly, Anakin reaches back. Obi-Wan counts that as a plus, intertwining their presences. It's relieving to know that Anakin is still out there, even if he's not right beside him. They've been without each other for five years.

Anakin feels decidedly irritated when he returns some hours later. Predictably, everything has erupted into sheer chaos. Tarkin is attempting to take control, but nothing is certain until they verify Sidious's death.

Meantime, they're leaving for Nur – the water moon where Fortress Inquisitorius is. Obi-Wan doesn't know what to expect of these Inquisitors, but he suspects they won't take their changing master very well. They serve the Sith though. It's what their purpose is.

**w**

It will take eight hours of hyperspace travel, which is a long time for them to be alone together. They've had worse, but Vader is simply not accustomed to it anymore. He doesn't know how to act. It would be easier if Obi-Wan would just explain it to him, but he won't any more than Sidious did. It's really a trial-and-error thing, and he doesn't appreciate it.

"This will be a long trip," Obi-Wan says, arms crossed. The gesture is so painfully familiar. "We should rest."

Something twists inside him, sharp and angry. "I cannot," he replies. "I have not been able to since Mustafar."

"For five years," Obi-Wan repeats. "I will admit I have had difficulty, but that seems like a slight... exaggeration."

"I lost it there, as everything else," he answers sharply. "I may have been too badly damaged. I draw my strength from the Dark Side."

Obi-Wan looks out the viewport again, something like painregrethorror flaring through the Force. "Can you breathe without your mask?"

"I wear a secondary respirator at all times," he answers. "In case the primary one is damaged."

"Good. I... would like to see you again. It has been a... long time."

'Long time' is an understatement. Being apart from him for so long was... It hurt more than anything else could. But he's really, really not sure if he wants to do it, but Obi-Wan is asking him to. There is no reason not to, because it's not as though Obi-Wan hasn't seen him without it already. "As you wish," he answers.

Something about the way Obi-Wan is moving now seems less threatening, quieter. Vader doesn't let his guard down, anyway, but he's not as tense as he was earlier. He hasn't taken this off in front of anyone in a long time, and it's mostly just unsettling to see another human face-to-face again so soon, but he reaches up to take it off.

Obi-Wan stands almost abruptly, too abruptly, and moves forwards – it reminds Vader again of how his master is so... he doesn't really know what the purpose of it is, actually. He was never this prone to physical contact before.

"After we take over the Empire, we can find... your wife and children," Obi-Wan continues, and Vader knows what he's doing – distracting him. He appreciates it, because it gives him something to think about other than stressing over the inevitable. "I imagine they will come to us. If not, finding them should not be difficult. Sidious has been searching for them. I could be mistaken, but I suspect Ahsoka is helping her."

"Sidious knew?" Vader asks. His anger flares again. Of course, his master knew. He knows everything.

"Yes, he did," Obi-Wan replies, setting the first half of the mask on the floor. "Or at least he knew of her. She was keeping the twins safe, but she wanted to fight against the Empire, too. They weren't staying in one place."

Vader still doesn't know what to think of that. He hasn't had time to think of it. She's still alive, and – and his children are alive. "I want to see them – if you will allow me."

"How could I deny you that?" Obi-Wan lifts the second half of his mask, stepping back. Vader can see the horror lingering in his eyes, the haunted expression that feels like it reflects his own soul.

He loathes how his appearance can elicit such a reaction. For most people, it would be expected, but this is Obi-Wan. This is – it's – he doesn't really know. Obi-Wan is his master, and he's the one who caused this.

"I would prefer not... having it off for long."

"That's fair," Obi-Wan replies, setting the other half down with the Force so as not to break their gaze. Obi-Wan's eyes are a Sithly golden now, burning with the strength of the Dark Side. His approach is slightly tentative, as he slowly lifts his hands again.

His intentions are clear, and Vader doesn't know what to think about that. He hasn't been touched in... years. So many years. He craves it, and yet... he fears it. He misses it too much to care, and he leans forwards, leaning into it. Obi-Wan's hands touch his face with a ridiculous amount of lightness, or maybe it's that he can't feel as much with his skin as he once could.

It's so gentle, so soft, almost tender. He leans more into it, craving more. It's been so long. He doesn't care that the parts he can actually feel hurt. He shouldn't want this so much – he's a Sith and most of all, this is Obi-Wan, but he doesn't care. It could almost be fleeting, no more than his imagination, but Obi-Wan doesn't pull away.

Vader doesn't, either.

It's very intimate, something he never would have had a problem with years ago, in another lifetime, but now it's... Obi-Wan hurt him.

He doesn't know why, but his eyes burn with a sudden onslaught of tears.

Obi-Wan's hand moves, lightly brushing the top of his head. "It hurts, doesn't it?" he asks, frowning, "When your helmet is taken on and off."

"It is inconsequential," Vader replies, because it's true compared to the rest of the pain he's constantly in.

Obi-Wan's frown only grows, hand dropping back to his cheek again.

"I will get you out of this," Obi-Wan promises him softly. "You've suffered long enough. We can – we will be family again."

"I deserve this," Vader objects – he sounds like Anakin now. Like... someone else.

"Did you have to tell yourself that to survive?" Obi-Wan asks him. His touch is infinitely gentle, and Vader reaches up, wrapping his hand around Obi-Wan's wrist to keep him there.

"You know what I have done, Master," he replies, quietly. What more of an answer can he give? He didn't have to just 'tell' himself that. It's the simple truth.

"Yes," Obi-Wan agrees, making no move to pull away, "But you are still. Anakin. You are still... my apprentice. I care for you, and you are still a person. You were Sidious's victim as much as all of us."

He doesn't know what to say to that. He wasn't a victim, was he? He – made his choice. It was the only choice he could make then, but still. Though he doesn't think Obi-Wan is much interested in debating the point. "I made my choice."

"Yes, you did." Obi-Wan sighs softly. "I didn't see who he was until it was too late. I lost you to him."

Obi-Wan's hand feels so... light and breakable under Vader's durasteel grip. Everything does, but for a fleeting moment, it reminds him of how something in him craves, ceaselessly, to hurt his master for all the pain he put him through, no matter how much Vader deserved it. And he did.

Vader lets it go as quickly as it comes, because it's no more than a fantasy – the same as it always was with Sidious. Obi-Wan is his master now, and he needs to remember that.

"I will get you out of this," Obi-Wan repeats, "You should have been given far better medical treatment from the start." His master traces his thumbs over his cheek, still with that unmistakable gentleness – he used to do this with a lifetime ago. Obi-Wan leans forwards, leans closer, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

Something tightens in Vader's chest at the gesture – it's the first time anyone shown him any real caring – assuming this is real – since... Padme, and he wants it. He wants to be held and comforted, even if he deserves none of it.

And Vader wants what his master is offering – to get out of this nightmare that's defined his existence for so long, but he can't. Sidious said it, and... and he doesn't deserve to.

He doesn't deserve this, either, but that doesn't stop him from wanting more. "Why are you doing this?" Vader asks. He doesn't want Obi-Wan to pull away, but he needs to know. This is never a game Sidious played, and he doesn't understand.

"I miss you." The Force rings with the honesty of it, and it's strange. "And I know you haven't touched anyone in a while."

"Five years," Vader corrects. It was also Obi-Wan who touched him last – that he remembers, because he thinks he has a vague recollection of Sidious doing it – but it was Padme that was last in a non-painful way.

"The most I want from you is a guarantee of your loyalty," Obi-Wan tells him finally. "You betrayed me once. I need an assurance you won't again."

It's... he doesn't know. It makes him uncertain, wary. His master could ask anything of him. "What is it that you require?"

"I am uncertain of anything that would restore my trust in you. I will tell you when I find it." He pulls his hand away – Vader lets him go, reluctantly – before Obi-Wan slides his arms around his back, holding him close.

Vader rests his head against his master's shoulder – the only person he ever wanted to call Master, and he has no idea why they're doing this. He hurt Obi-Wan, and they...

He can't cry anymore, but that doesn't stop a few stray tears from escaping before he forces himself to calm down. His respirator always interferes with it – it can't go as fast as it should.

He can feel the faintest touches of pressure in a few places, but it's limited to that. The gesture itself is enough to be appreciated, though. The very fact that Obi-Wan would be willing to is good enough. More than enough. It's overwhelming and confusing. He doesn't understand.

But he wants this, and it's already better than with Sidious. Maybe. He won't get his hopes up just yet. Sidious showed a kinder side sometimes, too. He already prefers Obi-Wan's, but... he doesn't know what his darker side is. (Yes, he does; he just doesn't want to think about it.)

He lets himself appreciate it for as long as it lasts, though. It's – not something he knows when or if it will be repeated. Obi-Wan finally pulls away, putting his helmet back on, before he leaves for the other cabin on the ship to rest.

(Apparently, he trusts Vader enough to do that while he's on board.)

**w**

Vader knows the Inquisitors will not be happy about this, but that hardly matters. All that matters is ensuring their continued loyalty. He doubts they'll be getting it from all of them, but any traitors will be dealt with.

The ten current Inquisitors are gathered in their meeting room when Vader and Obi-Wan step inside. All of their expressions instantly flicker between shock and confusion, as they look between the two.

"Why is he here, Lord Vader?" the Grand Inquisitor inquires, eyeing Obi-Wan. Obviously, they all knew who he is. And they also know that Vader's been looking for him all these years, even if they don't know why.

"He is your master now," Vader replies.

The Grand Inquisitors looks distinctly wary, suspicious. "We have only one master, other than you."

"Sidious has met an... unfortunate end," Obi-Wan cuts in, stepping forwards. The way the Dark Side swirls around him now, along with his obviously Sithly robes, he radiates a strange sense of power that he certainly never used to. They'd be stupid to question his authority, but many of them have never been particularly smart. "I am Lord Vader's master."

The Inquisitors exchange glances, but no one is brave enough to argue. He can feel the doubts and questions many of them have, though. It may not be a problem right now, but Vader will have to keep an eye on them.

"You are the new Emperor?" the Grand Inquisitor asks. He feels distinctly unhappy, even if it's well concealed.

"Not yet," Obi-Wan replies briskly, "But soon. I expect your continued loyalty to the Sith as Sidious did." His tone manages to carry an obvious warning undertone to it. Vader has to wonder when he learned to be like this. He's changed a lot. He's so... different from the Jedi Master Vader used to know. It's not at all like how he was talking to Vader, except... towards the beginning when he was first convincing him to agree to this.

"Of course," the Grand Inquisitor replies, though he seems no happier. He wants power. Likely, he foolishly hoped he would ascend to the rank of Sith Apprentice when Sidious died. Or become Sidious' apprentice if Vader did.

Obi-Wan leaves it at that, and they leave the room, moving through the halls. "They are rather unaccepting of this change," Obi-Wan observes.

"They seek power, and work little to earn it," Vader tells him flatly. He knows how much the Inquisitors squabble amongst themselves whenever he's not around, which is fine, so long as they accomplish their missions. Which they often don't, and he has to come in to finish the job.

"Some may prove to be assets, but others will be liabilities," Obi-Wan replies. "If the Jedi are not causing problems for the Empire, there is little reason to keep hunting them."

Vader only inclines his head in acknowledgement. If that's what his master wants, then it's up to him, really. As soon as they're in control of the Empire.

"What's the rest of this place for?" Obi-Wan inquires, "It is large for only ten Inquisitors."

"It is the main base for our operation," Vader answers. Obi-Wan might be a Sith, but Vader knows he'll be more than a little upset about the rest of this. To be fair, it's not as if he is appreciative of it either. "And Sidious... wanted a tomb of the Jedi here."

"He what?!" First comes disbelief, then horror, then rage. "He kept their bodies?"

"Yes." It was his master's desire, and it's not as if Vader had a say in it.

The fury on Obi-Wan's face, coiling around him in the Force, may not be directed at him, but Vader still finds it unsettling, to say the least. He has no idea when he might decide to lash out. He doesn't know where the line is, when to expect it, like he did with Sidious. "You let him keep them here?"

"He requested it." Demanded would be the more correct term.

"And you just agreed to it?"

What was he supposed to have done? It's not as if Sidious asked him. It's not as if this place is Vader's. "He was my master – as you are now."

Obi-Wan looks no less angry, but he breathes out quietly, turning away to scan the halls. "I suppose it was not truly your choice," he concedes, "But we will be dealing with this as soon as our rule is... established."

Something twinges in the Force, at the edge of Vader's awareness. Something is wrong, and the disturbance is only growing by the moment. "Master –"

"I sense it, too," Obi-Wan replies, stiffening, hand moving for his lightsaber, right as the Grand Inquisitor rounds the corner, holding his already ignited lightsaber. All the others are standing behind him.

"Under orders of Emperor Tarkin, you are traitors to the Empire," the Grand Inquisitor says, stalking forwards.

Tarkin? He's appointed himself the Emperor already? Vader isn't surprised about that, although clearly, the Grand Inquisitor must have called Coruscant himself after they left the room. They haven't been walking through the facility that long, either.

And, of course, if Tarkin knew that Obi-Wan was here, he'd immediately use that as an excuse to claim Vader was a traitor to the Empire. There's always been tension between them, but they had to work together because Sidious demanded it.

"You owe loyalty to the Sith first and foremost," Obi-Wan replies, "Stand down now, and I may consider this incident... a mistake."

The other Inquisitors exchange glances with each other.

"This Empire belongs to the Sith. Tarkin is insignificant."

"He worked with Lord Sidious," retorts the Grand Inquisitor, "He was my master. You are no true Sith. You are traitors." His desire for power really has gone to his head.

Vader can hear movement from behind them, and without even glancing back he knows that stormtroopers are starting to cut them off from all sides. They've probably already gotten direct orders from Emperor Tarkin, who they technically cannot disobey, regardless of what they want.

"We work with the Sith, for the Dark Side," the Second Sister objects, looking to the others.

"He is not a Sith!" the Third Sister spits venomously. Vader can see that determined look in her eyes, the hatred radiating off her as her gaze darts to him. And he knows why.

It's then that all out chaos breaks loose.

All the Inquisitors draw their lightsabers, some of them turning on each other, while the Grand Inquisitor lunges forwards, at Vader and Obi-Wan. The stormtroopers all prepare to fire.

They draw their lightsabers in unison, and this – it's the first time they've fought side by side since the Invisible Hand.

Obi-Wan's blade clashes with the Grand Inquisitor's, and Vader spins around, deflecting away the blasts when the stormtroopers start shooting. He Force blasts them down the hall away from them, right as the Third Sister lunges at him, releasing a cry of fury.

She's young and inexperienced, and he shoves her blade back easily as the Eighth Brother comes at him. The other Inquisitors are too lost in fighting each other, to the point that Vader isn't really sure which of them is on their side or Tarkin's. For now, it matters little, until or unless they choose to attack them.

The stormtroopers keep shooting, and he throws the Third Sister down the hall, reaching out and snapping the nearest troopers' necks with the Force. They foolishly keep pressing forwards, only to meet the same fate, until the Third Sister lunges for him again.

Fighting off the Inquisitors is easy, and Vader can tell Obi-Wan isn't having any harder of a time dealing with the Grand Inquisitor, even if he's not winning yet. He fights much like he did in the past, but something about it seems more ruthless and deadly than it ever did before.

It reminds him of... a little of what it was like on Mustafar. He saw it in Obi-Wan's eyes then, that look of wanting to hurt. It's often been true when he fought, even in the past, but it was never quite as prominent as it is now. Or maybe Vader's only noticing it more because he knows what can happen when that's directed at him.

All these years he was looking for Obi-Wan, even if part of him did, and still does, want to hurt him for what he did, he also wanted to turn him. He – he wanted him to be his master again, and the only way that could happen was if he Fell. Vader has that now, but he suddenly doesn't know if this is what he truly wants. Obi-Wan hurt him irreparably, and no reminders of how much he deserved it will take that away.

It will never stop hurting. He will never stop fearing.

Sidious was... not merciful, but neither is Obi-Wan. He hurt him once, and he could easily do it again. He will do it again, Vader is certain, if he ever decides he has the need to. He doesn't know if he can deal with that. He doesn't think he can handle that happening again or being trapped in this position Obi-Wan's his apprentice – where he has little choice but to let him hurt him – for... forever, really.

He can't stop himself from wondering if it was the right choice or if he should have... ended it on Ryloth.

(Maybe it isn't too late.)

It wasn't entirely intentional, to be fair, but he was... distracted. He's blocking the Third Sister's blade with his lightsaber when the Grand Inquisitor swings at him. He could have reacted faster to block it with his hand, but he's a moment too slow.

The blade slashes across his chest, and he steps back immediately, throwing both of his opponents aside, but it's already too late.

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