Sky stepped out of the car she had parked in front of the perfectly normal-looking two-story family house in a respectable neighborhood, not too far from where she lived.
She had never been here before, and all things considered, it was a fucking miracle she had found here, as she had barely been able to make out the address Cody had sent her on Whatsapp, tears blinding her vision.
How she had not crashed the car, was beyond her.
Hell, she had wanted to crash it, had wanted to drive straight into the headlights of an approaching truck, had wanted to jump out of the car and walk in front of a bus, because she couldn't take the pain that was breaking her chest and tearing her soul apart.
No matter how hard she tried, it was impossible to forget the things Hawk had yelled at her. His words were burned in her mind with a hot iron, they were playing in her ears on repeat, they were a dagger in her heart, piercing it again and again and again. I had to let you win 'cause you were so fucking messed up! You were never there for me! Why would anybody be with you? To get some pussy—
The last one hurt the most.
Tears started running down her face again. All too well she remembered how Hawk's hands had felt on her skin, his slender fingers, his calloused palms, his hot breathing on her neck when he laid her down on the bed. She couldn't stop thinking about the first time they had done it after getting back together. He had been so gentle, so fucking perfect. He had made her feel so, so good, had told her repeatedly how much he loved her, not just with words, but with his hands, his lips, his body. She had believed it, she had fallen like a falling star, she had given him everything, and—
It had all been a lie.
He had yelled it at her face, had spoken the cruel words with such conviction that they erased everything he had said or done before.
He had only wanted one thing from her, and she had been stupid enough to give it.
Wiping her tears in her sleeve, she sucked in a trembling breath and forced herself to calm down. The pain wasn't going anywhere - she knew it never would - but she had things that needed taking care of.
Pulling her phone from her pocket, she stepped out of the car onto her trembling legs and texted Cody.
I'm here
The answer came right away.
meet me at the back door
Sky stuffed the phone back into the pocket of her jeans and wiped her face on her sleeve. The tears had stopped running for now, but she knew they'd be back, sooner or later.
The night was too cold, the sun had set hours ago and Sky was shivering in her jeans and a hoodie as she started going around the house. The windows were dark, curtains closed - people were probably in bed already, Cody's parents in deep sleep without any idea what their son was doing.
Just like Sky's dad had no idea what she was doing.
That thought hurt, and Sky pushed Dad's image off her mind. She didn't want to think about him now, she wasn't ready to face his worry, his disappointment - they were too heavy for her to carry tonight when she could barely carry her own, broken heart.
She walked around the house, crossed a flawless lawn, noticed the swimming pool - and a trampoline, which made her think there were kids living in this house too. Did Cody have younger brothers or sisters? She didn't know. She barely knew Cody at all, and any other day that thought would have made her nervous, but not tonight. Tonight all she could feel was pain, and she was willing to do whatever it took to make it stop.
Cody sat there waiting for her on the back porch. When he saw her approaching, he stood up and flashed her a quick smile. He was a pretty boy, a year or two older than Sky, and she had always liked his features - the sharp jawline, dark eyes, ears a bit too big for his delicate face, a mouth with full lips that were like made for a crooked smile. It was just the kind of face Sky could have easily fallen for, had her heart not been so full of Hawk.
Hawk.
Why would anybody be with you? To get some pussy.
His words pierced her chest, the pain took her breath away, and again she was there on the front steps of his house, and he was yelling at her, his fists clenched, his voice breaking, he was shouting these horrible things to her and she knew they were all true.
She had never been worthy of more than that.
Stuffing her hands into the pockets of her hoodie to hide how much she was shaking, she walked closer to the boy on the porch.
"Hi," she breathed, her voice barely audible. "Sorry to bother you this late—"
"Don't worry about it," Cody replied - and there it was again, the crooked grin that was no doubt meant to be charming. "You found here alright?"
"Yeah, so—" she cleared her throat which was raw from all the crying. "What do you have?"
Cody let out a small laugh. "What do you need?"
"Pills," Sky shrugged. "Opiates. You know, whatever you've got."
"Okay, so that's your game. Let's see what I can do for you."
Cody walked down the steps from the porch to meet Sky. The movements of his body were smooth and mellow, like he had no hurry in the world - and still, there was something sharp in him, something cold that made Sky feel uneasy around him. He had a large, black gym bag in his fine, long-fingered hands, and a small smile played on his face that was lit by the moonlight when he opened the zipper and started going through the contents of the bag.
"Would this work for you?" he asked, showing Sky a small, plastic bottle. "I hear it's the bomb."
"You hear?" Sky glanced at Cody.
"I don't use, sweetie. I'm just a salesman."
Sky turned her eyes to the small bottle, her throat going dry with need. OxyContin. Hell yeah, that would work. She could almost taste the slightly bitter aftertaste the pills would leave on her tongue, those tiny wonders that would take away all the pain.
She raised a hand to take the bottle, but Cody yanked it away and took a step back. He let out a low laugh and shook his head teasingly.
"Come on, I'm sure you know how these things work. Money first."
"How much?"
Cody named his price - and Sky gave a silent nod. It sounded expensive, but Hell, she hadn't done this in such a long time that she had no idea what the street price for something like this was nowadays, so she just pulled her wallet from the pocket of her jeans, wishing there was something in it.
Fucking Hell–
She counted the bills again, and let out a desperate sigh.
"I don't have enough." Sky said, showing the bills to Cody. "I'm 50 bucks short."
Cody made a clicking sound with his tongue when he took the bills and counted them, shaking his head.
"Look, I can't sell you if you don't pay. It's nothing personal - just business," he said and offered the money back to Sky. She didn't take it. Since Cody had shown her the bottle, Sky hadn't been able to draw her eyes off it. That small vial was her only way out, the only release she could think of, the only escape from the pain that was tearing her apart. And she wouldn't leave this place without it.
"Please–" she let the despair cut through her voice. "Cody, come on. I need it. I can pay you later—"
"Sorry - can't trust the word of an addict."
"I'm not an addict—" Sky breathed, exasperated. "I just… I… It's just been a really rough night. Please. I promise I'll bring the money to you tomorrow—"
Cody let out a long sigh and leaned his back on a column. He looked at Sky as he weighed the bottle in one hand, the money in the other.
"Well, maybe there is something you can do to sweeten the pot."
Sky glanced at him, the sharp angles and dark shadows of his face under the pale moonlight.
"What do you mean?"
"Maybe we can negotiate a special price for you." He said with a slow grin, and his eyes turned to Sky's lips, her boobs. "You know, I hear you're great at… negotiating."
Sky's stomach tied into a tight knot. Suddenly she was extremely aware of every little detail of the night that surrounded them. The silence of the sleeping house, the humming of a highway some distance away, the small pink bike that leaned on the wall, the soccer ball on the lawn, the wind that was blowing right through her weary body chilling her bones and sending shivers down her spine - or maybe it wasn't the wind, maybe it was what Hawk had said, his words that had crawled their way into her soul like maggots into an apple and they were eating at the core of her being, turning everything inside of her cold, spoilt, rotten.
Cody's beautiful lips turned into a crooked smile as if he knew exactly what Sky was worth.
"Look, Cody—" she breathed, fighting the tears that made her voice raw and broken. "I… I really need that stuff. Are you selling or not?"
"Depends," Cody chuckled. "Are you kneeling, or not?"
Bah - I'm back writing the dark stuff. :(
