"Wait—" Sky felt a hand on her arm, trying to stop her, as she was walking out of the classroom.

She didn't have to look, to know who it was. Anger and shame flushed over her as she felt Hawk's familiar scent in the air, felt the grip of his fingers on her arm.

"Don't touch me," she snapped and yanked her arm free.

"Sky, stop, I just want to talk—"

She didn't stop, instead she started walking faster, trying to get away from him. There was nothing he could say that she wanted to hear.

"Are you high?" Hawk asked, stepping in front of her, forcing her to stop so that she almost walked straight into him. "I saw you take something in the classroom. What the fuck, Sky? You're doing drugs?"

"What do you care?" Sky asked, her voice trembling with emotion. "It's none of your fucking business."

He swallowed hard. His face was pale, there were dark shadows under his eyes and he looked like he hadn't slept in a week, but Sky didn't really care. He had never loved her, why the fuck did he pretend he was hurt now, that everything was over?

"Sky, come on, you've gotta stop that," he breathed. "I don't want you to get hurt–"

"Well too fucking late for that," Sky replied, fighting the tears. She would not cry in front of him, she would not give him that satisfaction. "Let me go, now, or I'll swear I'll hit you again."

For a short moment, he hesitated, but then did as she had told him and let his hands drop. Sky rushed past him, as fast as she could walk with her stupid leg.

She had sworn not to do drugs in school - but that resolution had shattered as soon as she had walked into the English classroom and seen Hawk. He had kept staring at her, and it had been too much, she had felt his familiar scent in the air when she'd taken her new seat, had heard how he sighed when he leaned his head on his hands, and it had been too much, she had remembered all the things he had said to her, Why would anybody be with you? To get some pussy, and it had been too much, it had all been too much to take, she had almost gotten a panic attack, so—

–so she had slipped that small pill into her mouth, and some ten minutes later she had been able to breathe again. The agonizing pain of her broken heart had melted into a haze where she knew she was still hurting, but there was a soft veil between her and the pain, a bit like she was watching it from afar, like it wasn't really her heart that was breaking, like it wasn't really she who was dying. The pills made this living Hell bearable, they kept her alive, for if she had to face Hawk without them—

Well, that would probably end with her slitting her wrists in the bathroom.

Sky gripped the straps of her backpack and breathed in as deep as she could, four counts in, six counts out, and tried to steady the frantic beat of her heart. One pill didn't seem to be enough for her to face Hawk, but if she took more, well then—

—then it was only a matter of time before someone else realized she was high in school too. And then Dad would find out. And that was yet another thought Sky couldn't take.

She made her way to the library - there were books she needed for a biology essay she was supposed to be writing about the life of Charles Darwin, and maybe getting them would give her something else to think about, something other than the distracting confrontation with Hawk, her lingering wish to die.

The library was one of Sky's favorite places in all the school. She had always been a nerdy girl and loved books - even if with all that had happened in the past year and a half she had been reading a lot less than before. Still, she loved libraries for what they were: these havens of knowledge, free for everyone to walk in and learn. She knew this was a love learned from Dad, but she didn't mind. It was a gift Dad had given her - the love for books, for the stories that would make you lose yourself between the pages, for the things you could learn, to see, to experience without ever leaving the room.

There were a couple of kids doing homework at a table, discussing with low voices, but otherwise, the place was empty. Breathing in the soft, warm scent of books, Sky walked past the studying boys and searched the right shelf. There was a sense of silence, of tranquility in here and little by little her heartbeat calmed down as she ran her fingers on the backs of the books.

On The Origin of Species. Sky's fingers stopped on the old, leather-covered volume, and then moved on to the next book. Charles Darwin - Destroyer of Myths. Maybe she should take both of them? She could already see herself lying on her big, four-poster bed, drowning herself in these thick volumes with a mug of hot chocolate in her hands—

"Hi—" said a soft voice on the other side of the shelf. "Sky, is it you?"

Sky peeked through between the books, saw a pair of hazel eyes, surrounded by thick, long lashes.

Cody.

"Yeah, it's me," she replied, keeping her voice low not to bother the other people in the library.

Cody flashed her a smile, though Sky could only see it in his eyes, as books covered the rest of his face. "Wait, I need to talk to you—"

His face disappeared, Sky heard his soft, nearly soundless footsteps running down the aisle behind the shelf, and then he appeared in front of her, in jeans and a sweater, holding a book in his beautiful hands, a catchy smile playing on his lips.

He walked closer, and that smile on his lips was all Sky could look at. She didn't know if it was the drugs, or if it was the fact that he was so beautiful, but suddenly Sky had a hard time concentrating on anything but the boy in front of her.

"Charles Darwin?" he asked, glancing at the books Sky'd been checking out.

"Yeah, I've got to write an essay about his life," Sky replied, clearing her suddenly dry throat, and then, noticing the book in Cody's hands, arched a brow. "The Brief History of Time?"

"For physics," Cody let out a small laugh. "I suck at it, honestly, so I thought I'd give this a go."

"That's really good. It's super catchy."

"You've read it?"

"What can I say? I like to read," Sky replied, pushing away the dark shadows that threatened to lurk back into her mind as she remembered how little she'd read after Kat's death, how it had been impossible to concentrate on reading as she'd been busy between just wanting to kill herself and falling in love with Hawk.

Cody didn't seem to notice the change in her mood, the sudden sadness that took her smile away, or if he did, he didn't comment on it.

"I like to read too," he said, and it sounded like a confession, like something he was telling his best friend instead of someone he barely knew, some random addict who was buying drugs from him.

"I noticed. You had some quite heavy readings on your nightstand. Anna Karenina? Seriously?"

"One of my favorites," Cody laughed, and suddenly he had red spots on his high cheekbones as if this sudden confession had embarrassed him somehow and he had said more than he had meant to.

He broke the eye contact, laid the Brief History of Time on the shelf, opened his backpack, and pulled something out of it, something pink and soft—

"You forgot this at my place—" He said and passed Sky the hoodie she had left behind when rushing out of his house that morning a couple of days ago.

"You washed it—" Sky let him place the hoodie on her hands, and then hugged the soft cloth against her chest, breathing in the faint scent of fabric softener that was the same as in Cody's sheets. "You didn't have to do that."

Cody waved that off with his hand.

"It was no trouble," he said, and then, lowering his voice. "So… how are you doing? Feeling any better?"

"I'm okay," Sky said, even if it was a lie and the look in Cody's eyes told her he didn't believe it either. A short, awkward silence fell between them, and the red spots on Cody's cheeks grew, reaching his ears.

"I guess I was just worried. I know, it's none of my business, but still," he finally continued. "And I also wanted to give you this—"

He pulled something from the back pocket of his jeans - a small envelope - and passed it to Sky. She took it and glanced at Cody with a question in her eyes but as he simply shrugged, she opened the envelope.

There was a simple card, with a picture of a very cute, kind of grouchy-looking hedgehog and a text that said "I'm sorry I was a jerk."

"You're the hedgehog?" she asked, arching a brow.

"Maybe I am."

Sky couldn't help a small smile in the corner of her mouth as she flipped the card open and read the handwritten note inside.

I was such a jerk.

So sorry, honestly.

Can we maybe start over?

Sky let out a sigh and read the text again. Cody's handwriting was beautiful, a bit old-fashioned, with long curves and clear lines. Yeah, he had been a jerk - a massive jerk - but boys were idiots when it came to sex. At least that was her experience. And - she couldn't deny it - Cody had also probably saved her life by stopping her from emptying the half bottle of OxyContin in one sitting, he had let her stay in his own bed while he slept on the floor and he had been nothing but nice to her ever since.

"Does that smile mean I'm forgiven?" Cody asked silently, and Sky looked up from the card and met the gaze of his pretty, hazel eyes.

"You were a dick, you know," she said, but the smile still lingered on.

"Then let me make it up to you. Let me buy you a cup of coffee."

Sky let out an incredulous laugh. She hugged the hoodie and the card closer to her chest and shifted on her feet.

"Are you… asking me out?"

"I don't know," Cody's cheeks blushed slightly. "Would that be weird?"

"Yes," Sky replied sternly. "Definitely weird."

"Okay," Cody replied with a nervous laugh. "Then I'm not asking you out. I'm just asking you to have a coffee with me. Not a date, just an apology. Besides, you never finished that coffee at my place so I really do owe you one."

She was suddenly reminded of that coffee she had never finished because Cody had started telling her she shouldn't be doing drugs - but he wasn't telling her that now, and Sky was still a bit high, feeling soft and fluffy, like nothing bad could touch her, so she answered his smile and let it grew on her lips.

"Fine, that I can do. But I don't want coffee."

"Then what do you want?" Cody asked, a bit teasingly, definitely with a tone you wouldn't use with just a friend, but Sky noticed she didn't care. In fact, she liked it.

"I want a milkshake. You know, one of those giant, super extravagant ones with a mountain of whipped cream and all the toppings in the world."

Cody laughed, a bit louder than would have been okay in the library, and someone made a comment telling him to shut the fuck up. He didn't seem to care. His smile was so wide that the grin revealed all his white, a bit wolfish teeth.

"Milkshakes it is then. Today? I'll pick you up - at six? Is that okay for you?"

"Six sounds good."

"Great. Just text me your address."

And for a short moment Cody looked into her eyes and there was something there, like softness, vulnerability, but it was gone the next heartbeat and a crooked, charming smile overtook his features. With a laugh, he picked up the Brief History of Time, and turned to leave, but Sky kept looking after him until he disappeared behind the shelves.

Her cheeks were hot, and she kept hugging the hoodie against her chest, breathing in the scent of Cody's fabric softener, lilacs, and lavender, with a hint of his own scent, the spicy aftershave mixed with paper and books.

Lost in her thoughts, Sky didn't notice a certain someone who had followed her into the library, a boy who - standing behind the shelves - had heard everything that had been said between her and Cody. She didn't see the devastated look on his face, the way his fingers curled into fists. In a heartbeat he was gone, running out of the library to catch up with the boy who was leafing through the Brief History of Time as he went.