"Congratulations, ma'am! You're having a baby."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Olivia didn't remember anything about her walk from the doctor's office back to the oh-so-familiar room.

She remembered almost nothing the doctor had told her. Something about how the pregnancy was so early that all possibilities still had to be considered, and nothing was certain yet.

That for women her age, the risk of miscarriage during the first trimester was considerable.

The world had disappeared around her, and time had stopped, and she hadn't realized she'd left the doctor's office. At one point, she just found herself standing at the door of the room before the guard opened it and pushed her inside. From somewhere inside her own bubble, she saw some indistinct figure stand up, but she didn't pay much attention until his voice next to her startled her.

"Liv! Are you okay?"

Elliot.

But it wasn't until she felt hands on her shoulders that she forced herself to look up and surprised herself that she managed to do that.

"Huh?"

"What happened?" Her partner's eyes were full of worry, fear, and she blinked, tried, tried to get her brain working again, but she knew it was already too late. Elliot already knew that something was wrong.

"I…"

"Did they do something to you? I swear to God, I shouldn't have left you alone…"

"It's fine, El," her lips formed the words she didn't even have time to think. "I'm fine."

"Like hell you are," Elliot's worried look didn't change a bit. "You look like..."

Like my life has just shattered in front of my eyes.

"I'm fine!" She snapped, gaining strength from something she didn't even recognize, and yanked herself out of her partner's grip. "I'm not a baby you have to babysit! As you once kindly reminded me, you can't always be looking over your shoulder, making sure I'm okay. I can take care of myself."

Elliot's hands dropped, his jaw tightened, and he narrowed his eyes. Olivia knew that yelling at him was completely pointless; he was in no way responsible for the situation, but for some reason she couldn't do anything else at the moment.

"Oh yeah? And I can see you're doing it really well."

Anger flared up inside Olivia, and she wanted to slap him, but instead she clenched her fists, and before turning on her heel, she hissed between her teeth:

"Screw you, Elliot."

And then she forced her feet to move, strode to the far corner of the room, sat down, and buried her face in her knees. And Elliot didn't follow her, so she didn't have to hold back the tears that started rolling down her cheeks.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Pain.

So much pain.

A baby screaming.

"Congratulations, ma'am."

Blue eyes.

Brown curls.

Her baby.

"She's perfect, Liv."

Strange hands lifting her away.

Taking away their baby.

"No! NO!"

Olivia snapped awake with a violent flinch, groping the air with her hands, her gown damp with sweat. Her heart was about to explode in her chest, panic was sparking inside her, and in the pitch-black room she had nothing to cling to. She sat up, wiped the hair stuck to her skin from her face, and fumbled around with her hands.

Despite the panic which was already there, she felt her stomach turn over as she felt nothing but the walls and the floor. For two weeks, Elliot had stubbornly slept next to her no matter what the situation was, and his absence was quickly starting to grow her distress.

"El!" She hissed, voice hoarse. "Where are you?"

No answer.

"Elliot!"

But then a sleepy murmur broke the suffocating silence, and only then did Olivia notice that tears had wet her cheeks.

"What?"

"Where are you?"

"Here."

Olivia's legs started to move, she groped forward in the pitch blackness, and finally almost tripped over her partner lying on the floor.

"Is this you?"

"Mhm."

And then she dropped to her knees, lay down, and without a moment's hesitation threw her arms around him and pressed her face against his chest. She could tell from Elliot's momentarily stiffening body that he hadn't been expecting this, but she didn't have the energy to start explaining.

She just needed him.

Quickly, however, Elliot registered her sweat-drenched gown and trembling body, and she felt his hand on her back as he began to stroke it soothingly. It made her cling to him even tighter, and he seemed to hesitate for a moment before whispering:

"A nightmare?"

She didn't answer, just nodded weakly against his chest and felt him sigh. For a moment they stayed silent again, his steady breathing and heartbeat slowly calming Olivia, before he asked:

"You wanna talk about it?"

"I…" Olivia bit her lip, tears began to roll down her cheeks again, and suddenly the face of the child she had seen in her dream returned to her retinas so clearly that it almost took her breath away. Elliot felt her body tense up and sighed softly into her hair.

And that's when the dam broke inside her, the words rushed like a flood from her lips, and she couldn't stop them.

"I'm pregnant."

It was as if someone had removed the batteries from Elliot's back. The hand on her back stopped, his breathing stopped, and pressed against his chest, Olivia was almost certain his heart stopped for a moment as well. And she said nothing, just let the words sink into his consciousness.

And when it did, he restarted as if someone had given him an electric shock. His body flinched violently, and he sat up like a rocket, so fast that Olivia hit her jaw on the floor. She couldn't see her partner's face in the dark, but his shallow breathing told her enough.

"W-what?!"

"I…" Olivia tried, but her jaw began to quiver, and a rapidly intensifying sob was squeezing her throat, making it difficult to speak. "I'm pregnant."

It was quiet for a moment, but then Elliot's voice, completely unfamiliar to her, came from the darkness:

"But… How?"

Olivia would have liked to just cry, but she forced herself to take a breath, organize her words, and stand up like her partner.

You started this, so now you have to finish this.

"When your wound got infected."

Another silence descended, but this time she could almost hear her partner's brain working as it made hasty calculations.

"But it was… Two weeks ago…"

"Yeah."

And then she closed her eyes, knowing, waiting for the next time his confusion would be replaced by anger. But when nothing was heard, she opened her eyes again and whispered:

"El?"

"Why the hell didn't you tell me?" Elliot's voice was stifled, hoarse, and caused Olivia to swallow hard.

"You were sick, and I didn't want to... Endanger your health."

"Endanger my health?!" Elliot's voice began to rise, there were grunts of frustration all around them, but the air was too thick, too burning between them for her to pay attention to them. She would have liked to see her partner, but the wish was futile in this darkness. "You… They raped you, and you decided not to tell me for two weeks?!"

"They didn't rape me!" Was all she was able to say as tears streamed down her face. I hope.

"They didn't?" Elliot's voice was anything but convinced. "So, you just agreed to join this "program", you chose one of them and voilá, the baby is coming? I thought we were supposed to be partners, and apparently my assumption was wrong that we talk to each other about things!"

"It wasn't... I was just trying to protect you!" Olivia tried, but he wouldn't let her continue.

"Protect me? So what about all that talk about taking care of yourself?! You always want to protect others, but you forget yourself, Liv," Elliot's voice broke, and she barely managed to stifle the sob that was about to escape her lips.

"I'm sorry!"

"So, what's next?" Elliot's voice still trembled with anger, but he creditably managed to get it under control. "Do you know who the father is?"

Here goes nothing…

"You."

The descending silence was so deep and dense it could have been cut with a knife. Olivia closed her eyes.

"Or at least he told me so."

"But…" This time Elliot's voice was truly quiet; the anger was gone, replaced by genuine confusion. "How?"

"I don't know more about it, but Father said that they had used electricity when they removed the knife from your back. And yes," she added before her partner could say anything. "I met him that same evening you were sick. And I promise to tell you everything, but the reason I haven't been able to do it before is… I'm not totally certain he didn't use his… His own sperm on me. He said it wasn't part of his principles, but I was unconscious, and I didn't…"

And she could no longer hold back the cry that erupted from deep within her, and she wrapped her arms around herself, shaking, feeling a deeper and more complete helplessness than ever before. She heard Elliot step closer, and then she felt his arms around her, warm, comforting, and a sob escaped her lips.

"If he said it is not part of his principles, I have a strong feeling that he also meant it."

"H-he said that our child will be for him… A j-jackpot."

"Okay."

"But El… W-what are we gonna do?"

Elliot was quiet for a moment, but then she felt his hand land lightly on her belly before he pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"We're going to save our baby."

Accompanied by another sob, she pressed herself tighter into her partner's embrace, squeezed her eyes shut, nodded, and placed her hand on his hand on her stomach.

"We're going to save our baby."