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Chapter Six
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SUMMARY: Vildan has trouble settling into his new life, so Laniër has an idea…
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"All you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn't hurt."
- Charles M. Schulz
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13th of September 2945 T.A.
"You seem restless this morning," Laniër observed, as she held a forkful of eggs in front of Melui's mouth. "Here you are, gwinnig." She lifted the child's hand, placed it on the handle, and helped her put it in her mouth. "That was tasty, yes?" she smiled.
"I suppose I am, rather," Vildan said as he lifted his teacup to take a sip. "A Vanguard's days is filled with activity: weapons drills, patrolling, riding, and such." He stroked Melui's head and forced a smile. "I keep expecting her to run off and get into something."
"I know," Laniër's eyes grew sad. "Do you need to take some time for yourself? Perhaps go riding, or take a walk in the forest?"
The tablecloth under their breakfast dishes glowed a bright red under the morning sun, and small sparkles of light danced across the fabric as they lifted their glasses of juice.
Vildan swallowed his lemon tea and picked up a roll. "That is not a bad idea. Tell me; have you left Melui's side since this all happened?"
After a moment of silence, she shook her head slightly. "I have no reason to complain. I love Melui and want to do this for Meássë."
"Still, we all need a change of pace, to rest our minds and regain our perspective. Let us strike a bargain," he said. "We will all spend the morning outdoors, and you will take this afternoon off. I am sure you want to spend a few hours in your own home?"
"It might be nice," she admitted. "I took Melui there once a week or so to take care of the dusting and pick up more clothes, so it is not neglected, but it would be nice to spend a few hours there."
"Then it is settled. Once Melui settles down for her afternoon nap, I want you to take the rest of the day."
"Are you sure?" she asked, giving the Elfling a sidelong glance. "I can—"
"No," he said firmly. "You have earned this. I am grateful for your dedication, but I am here now, and Melui needs to learn to turn to me for her needs." He set down his fork and wiped the corners of his mouth. "It is a pleasant day, and I would like for us to spend the morning outdoors. Some of the birds are preparing to fly south, and I would like to hear them before they leave."
"I have an idea," she brightened. "You might want to walk through the Arnœdiad a Inglor?"
"I have not done that exercise in years," he mused, "and the need for it has never been greater." He smiled. "Thank you for suggesting it."
Once breakfast was done, and Melui dressed for the day, he kissed Melui's cheek, left the apartment and wandered outdoors. The leaves were beginning to turn on the trees, the summer flowers were devoid of blossoms, making way for their autumn friends: Sweet Alyssum, Asters in both lavender and pink, the sturdy Marigolds in gold and maroon, and of course, Chrysanthemums in every shade. Bees hovered over the flowers seeking pollen and nectar to take back to their colonies in the hives just outside the city.
"Look, Melui!" Laniër raised her finger skyward as geese flew overhead in their customary V formation. "Listen to them! They are looking forward to their winter home, yes?"
Vildan swallowed hard, grateful for the discipline of his military training to drive out any hint of desperation. "Do not worry, Dailên; not every bird leaves us. We still have the Owls, the Cardinals, and the Jays to entertain us. I will ask Lord Elrond if we can place a bird feeder outside our window so you can watch for them. Will that not be fun?"
"What a wonderful idea!" Laniër squeezed Melui's hand, as they walked. "Here we are!" she said cheerily as they reached the entrance to the tall shrubs. "I could stay here with her, Vildan, while you take your turn and go after myself."
"I think we could do it together. Vildan reached down and took his niece's hand. Who knows? Melui might receive some benefit from it."
"I hope so, Mellon."
Inglor's Labyrinth, as the residents of Imladris call it, Arnœdiad a Inglor, was a replica of the original garden in Valinor built by Gildor's father. Several centuries ago, his son created the structure as both a tribute to his Adar, and as a means of comfort to those in Middle Earth who remembered the beauty of Aman under the light of the Two Trees. It also held great benefits for those who had not; almost everyone who embarked upon this introspective journey came away feeling better.
The Labyrinth is not a maze, but rather a circular structure made up of tall, manicured shrubs, which gently guided its visitors through several curvilinear paths, the center of which held a small stone tower, surrounded by an ornate, winding staircase in the center, leading to the top where the participant knelt before the sculpture and revealed what was on his heart. It has no blind alleys or dead ends as mazes have. The path twists and turns back on itself many times before reaching the center, but there is only one path. And, once at the center, there is only one way back out. 1
"Let us begin," Vildan said. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and began the ancient, meditative song. As they began the Hyamiëndë their voices harmonized as they slowly walked through the paths, and Vildan focused on the burdens that weighted upon his heart: the grief over Meássë's and Narseg's deaths, his sorrow at seeing his beautiful, impish niece so silent and unaware. The three of them walked slowly in prayer, Vildan recalled his own failings and made ready to confess them and ask forgiveness, thereby cleansing his troubled fëa and hopefully have Eru's will be made clear to him.
Vildan's eyes remained closed yet the song guided them around each sharp turn, and while he never let go of Melui's hand, he could no longer feel her fingers in his. The world and all its distractions slowly fell away, like dropping pebbles onto the stone path, until there was nothing but feel of his lungs rising and falling as he took in the fresh autumn air, and it was only then he understood what lay upon his heart, and what he needed to ask.
When he opened his eyes again, they were at the foot of the ornate staircase in the center. He turned to meet Laniër's eyes, who nodded at him to go first.
Breathe, focus, focus…
As he climbed the narrow staircase, he thought of Melui, as she used to be: Golden hair flying behind her as she ran through the halls of Imladris, her delightful giggle when he picked her up and swung her over his head. The joy he felt whenever she gazed up at him with her bright eyes and wide smile.
Once at the top of the tower, he studied the carved seated figure of the seated, ageless being. Some think it Manwë, the Highest King of Eä and husband to Queen Varda. Some who need the comfort of Eru Ilúvatar himself, imagine it is he who looks benevolently down upon the petitioner.
The Vanguard knelt before the statue raised his palms to the sky with closed eyes and an open heart.
Vildan cleared his mind and inward, to that small part of himself where dwelled the purest love of for the Ilúvitar, who first bid the Ainur to sing the world into being. His mind grew quiet, eager for any sort of response or inspiration that might come.
An image came to him, but it wasn't Melui. It was of a tall, red-haired Sylvan with green eyes and the most beautiful smile he had ever seen.
His eyes flew open and he managed to cover his mouth before the sob escaped.
Please help me, he begged silently. I need the strength let go of what can never be. To drive Tauriel from my heart and wish her a happy life with someone else. I have to help Melui; she is my only concern now, but how can I do this when I feel so divided?
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ELVEN TRANSLATIONS:
Arnœdiad a Inglor – "The Labyrinth of Inglor" was an outdoor maze-like structure built by Gildor, in honor of his father, Inglor.
Dailên – "Little Beauty," Vildan's nickname for his niece, Melui.
Gwinnig – my little maid
Hantalë Calyalé – (Quenya) "Path of Illumination" is the prayer to be sung as they slowly make their way out of the Labyrinth. It is a song of thanks to Eru for helping the participant find his or her calm center, and, at times, has a plan to proceed with the situation or problem they might be experiencing.
Hyamië Surië – (Quenya) Lit. "Prayer of Seeking" is the song Elves sing as they enter the Labyrinth. "Center" does not mean the center of the structure, but the center of one's fëa. It is a meditative exercise to help the participant lay down the outward (and inward) burdens, on the way inside. When the Elf reaches the center, he or she climbs to the top of the tower, the kneel before the statue and beseech the of one's heart, to lay aside the cares that are weighing the heart.
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NOTES:
1 This is based on the Labyrinths we have here on earth. More information can be found here: walking-the-labyrinth-3435825#:~:text=Labyrinth,a.
And here: faith-and-prayer/prayer-stories/pray-effectively/4-ways-to-pray-in-a-labyrinth
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