The Warriors: Protectors of the Multiverse
Chapter 116
The Warriors were now heading to the next world and that world was Hercules but before the Warriors show up we're going to take a look at the backstory of Hercules
The schematic picture of Olympus zooms in and turns into a real one. While the Muses still repeat their "ah's and yeah's", the camera moves up the mountain slope, while it does, the movie title, HERCULES, is shown. Then the camera goes inside, passing various chattering gods and finds baby Hercules who took Hera's crown
Hercules! Behave yourself. Hera said
Oh, look at this. Look how cute he is! Oh, he's strong...like his dad, hmm? Zeus said
Zeus Hera and all the other gods saw someone coming in
Whoa! Excuse me! Hot stuff coming through! Excuse me. One side, Ares. the fast god said
Why, Hermes, they're lovely. Hera said
Yeah, you know, I had Orpheus do the arrangement. Isn't it too nutty? Fabulous party, you know, I haven't seen this much love in a room since Narcissus discovered himself! Hermes said
Narcissus is shown, staring into his mirror and making kissing sounds. Also, Baby Hercules gets one of Zeus' lightnings and plays with it
Dear, keep those away from the baby. Hera said
Oh, he won't hurt himself. Let the kid have a little fun! Zeus said
Baby Hercules tries to eat the lightning, gets zapped, and throws it away in frustration. Three gods jump away from its path, untill Athena hits it with her sword so it hits a pillar, which immediately reappears
Oh, on behalf of my son, I want to thank you all for your wonderful gifts. Zeus said
What about our gift, dear? Hera said
Well, let's see here.. we'll take, hmm, yes, a little cirrus, and, hmm, a touch of nimbostratus, and a dash of cumulus. Zeus said
Zeus moves his hands around with a little pegasus-shaped cloud on it closer to baby Hercules, and the cloud turns out to be a baby pegasus
His name is Pegasus, and he's all yours, son. Zeus said
Baby Hercules bonks his forehead against Baby Pegasus'. He whinnies and licks Hercules. They hug, letting all the gods sigh
Mind his head. Hera said
He's so tiny. Zeus said
Baby Hercules tries to bite the medallion that hangs from his neck and then yawns
My boy. My little Hercules. Zeus said
How sentimental. a voice said
All of the gods turned and saw a gray man with a gray shirt and a black toga with blue flaming hair
You know, I haven't been this choked up since I got a hunk of moussaka caught in my throat! Huh? the blue flame-haired man said
All of the other gods look sternly at him
So, is this an audience or a mosaic? Hey, how you doin'? Lookin' good. Nice dress. the blue flamed-haired man said
As he is saying that, he moves from one god to another untill Zeus squeezes him in a hug
So Hades, you finally made it. How are things in the Underworld? Zeus said
Well, they're just fine, you know, a little dark, a little gloomy, and as always, hey, full of dead people. What are you gonna do? Ah! There's the little sunspot, little smootchie. And here is a sucker for the little sucker, eh? Hades said
Hades then weaves a sucker with a skeleton head out of thin mist
Here you go. Ya just... Hades said
Baby Hercules squeezes Hades' finger, and after some fight he gets away from the baby
Sheesh! Uh, powerful little tyke. Hades said
Come on, Hades, don't be such a stiff, join the celebration! Zeus said
Hey, love to, babe, but unlike you gods lounging about up here, I regrettably have a full-time gig You know, by the way, so charitably bestowed on me, Zeus, So.. can't. Love to, but can't. Hades said
Zeus: You ought to slow down, you'll work yourself to death...Hah! work yourself to death! Zeus said
The other gods then started to laugh
Oh, I kill myself. Zeus said
If only, if only... Hades said
(Scene changes back to the Muses)
If there's one god who you don't want to get steamed up, it's Hades. Calliope said
Cause he had an evil plan. Terpsichore said
The scene changes to a boat on the River Styx, in which a skeleton is carrying Hades
(He ran the Underworld.)
(But thought the dead were dull and uncouth.)
Two souls lean up from the lake bed to grab Hades who zaps them away and blows the smoke off his finger like a pistol
(He was as mean as he was ruthless.)
(And that's the gospel truth.)
A pair of skeletal gates open, and Cerberus' heads snarl and snap their jaws viciously Hades throws them a piece of steak for the dogs to eat which the dogs fight over as the boat continues its journey down the river
(He had a plan to shake things up!)
(And that's the gospel truth!)
Soon Hades arrives at the dock with a staircase leading to his lair
Pain! Hades said
Coming, your most lugubriousness! Pain said
Pain trips and bounces on the stairs while landing his butt on a sharp trident and starts screaming
Panic! Hades said
Oh, I'm sorry. I can handle it! Panic said
Panic runs but he trips over Pain who just got free from the trident falls over and his horns get stuck in Pain's butt Pain screams again while Hades rolls his eyes disgustedly
Pain! Ow! Pain said
And Panic! Panic said
Reporting for duty! they both said
Fine, fine, fine. Just let me know the instant the Fates arrive. Hades said
Pain pulls his friend's horns out of his rump
Oh! They're here! Panic said
Hades then bursts into flames angrily
WHAT?! The Fates are here, and YOU DIDN'T TELL ME?! Hades said
Pain and Panic then turned into worms
Oh we are worms! Worthless worms! they both said
Memo to me, memo to me: Maim you after my meeting. Hades said
The scene changes to a chamber with the Fates
Darling, hold that mortal's thread of life good and tight. Atropos said
Atropos cuts a thread with some scissors and a woman's scream is heard
Incoming! Lachesis said
The Fates laugh as a soul enters the cave and flies into a tunnel the counter above the tunnel now says "Over 5000000001 served"
Ladies! Hah! I am so sorry that I'm... Hades said
Late. the fates said
We knew you would be. Clotho said
We know everything. Lachesis said
They pass their only eye from one another as they speak the next three lines
Past. Clotho said
Present. Lachesis said
And future. Atropos said
Atropos whispered something to Panic
Indoor plumbing, it's gonna be big. Atropos said
Great. Great. Anyway, see, Ladies, I was at this party, and I lost track of... Hades said
We know! the fates said
Yeah. I know...you know. Hades said
Hades then goes over to a map table depicting Greece with pawns of Zeus and the gods
So, here's the deal. Zeus, Mr. High and Mighty, Mr. "Hey, you, get off of my cloud". Now, he has... Hades said
A bouncing baby brat. the fates said
We know. Clotho said
Hades then bursts into flames again
I know! You know. I know. I got it. I got the concept. So, let me just ask: Is this kid gonna mess up my hostile takeover bid, or what? What do you think? Hades said
Um... Lachesis said
Oh no, you don't. We are not supposed to reveal the future. Clotho said
Oh wait, I'm sorry. Time out. Can I? Can I ask you a question, by the way? Are you, did you cut your hair or something? You look fabulous. I mean, you look like a fate worse than death. Hades said
Lachesis giggles more before Clotho hits her on the head the eye falls out into the hands of Panic
Oh, gross! Panic said
Yech! It's blinkin'! Pain said
Pain then kicks it into Hades' hand, who pulls off a dust strand from the eye.
Ladies, please, my fate... Hades said
Hades puts the eye on Lachesis' hand
Is in your lovely hands. Hade said
Oh? Lachesis said
Oh, all right. Clotho said
Ahh... Lachesis said
The eye raises in the air showing pictures of the future
Hades the god of the underworld is about to see the future being told by the fates but he was about to get a surprise what could that surprise be and how will he react stay tuned
TO BE CONTINUED
