Chapter Nine - Only Human After All

Annabeth was standing on the wrap around porch facing away when I stepped outside the Big House. The sun had begun to properly rise, slowly chasing away the shadows of the valley. The early morning rays of the sun crowned her golden blonde hair like a halo of light. Where Andromeda's dark hair stood in stark contrast with her pale skin, Annabeth's golden curls were enhanced by her light sun-kissed tan. Both girls were pretty in their own unique ways, and both made it hard for me to breathe or think straight. Not that my thoughts about them were in any way particularly straight.

For a moment I stood mesmerized, my internal turmoil taking a backseat to the intrusive thoughts of running my fingers through her hair. I wanted to reach out and tug on those tight curls - to straighten them out and watch them bounce back into place. The sound of the door closing caught her attention, and she turned to me. I fought down a blush as her intense grey eyes kept me fixed in place. They seemed to stare right through me to my very soul, as if she was judging my worth. Whatever it was in me that she saw made her face soften.

"Hey," she said.

"H-hey," I said back, my voice cracking.

And just like that, whatever spell had been cast was broken. I could feel the grief like a physical force gripping my chest, making it hard to breathe. Stinging in the corners of my eyes let me know I was on the verge of crying. Annabeth crossed the small distance between us and pulled me into a hug - completely unraveling the small amount of control I'd managed to hold onto.

"I'm sorry," Annabeth murmured softly as the sobs wracked my body.

"I-I-I just... I just got her b-back," I cried. "I ran away from home... From her! I thought... I-I... I... she was dead and then she wasn't and... and now she's de... she's gone!"

"I..." Annabeth hesitated. "I know how you feel. Kind of."

"H-how? How can you... How?"

"I had a friend before I came to the camp," she said. "She was older than me. Took care of me like a big sister after I ran away from home. She... didn't make it over the hill. Some monsters were chasing us and... she bought the rest of us time to get to safety. I know it's not the same, but... I get it. And I'm here if you... you know... if you need someone to talk to. Or not talk to. Or if you just want a friend."

My heart squeezed. A friend. I did want that. With her just as much as with Andromeda. I couldn't speak, so I nodded.

"Let's get you back to your cabin," Annabeth said. "I'd suggest washing up a bit, but that blessing from Aphrodite must have been really potent or something."

I sniffled a little, confused, and quietly asked what she meant. My voice was cracked and barely audible, and I wasn't sure if she could hear me or not. Somehow she must have since she responded.

"Normally if someone was crying their eyes out like you were, wearing makeup like you are, they'd look like a raccoon or maybe some extra in a horror movie with black ooze dripping from their eyeballs," She said. "But your makeup is still perfect. Heck, your eyes aren't even puffy. There's a small amount of redness to them, but it's barely noticeable."

I had forgotten I had makeup. I'd even tried to remove it last night before bed using alcohol wipes but it had stubbornly refused to budge, so I had simply given up and gone to sleep. I feel like if this blessing could be packaged and sold, someone would stand to make millions. Or maybe not, since someone would only have to buy it once. Not a lot of profit to be had in longevity, I suppose.

Was I spiraling? Maybe just a little bit. But it helped me to get my thoughts away from... painful things. And that's what I wanted. I had mourned my mom already years ago when I thought she had died in front of me. I mourned and grieved and moved forward. I'd even gotten a measure of closure when I had killed that hydra. Though I knew it was impossible that it was the same hydra, it still counted. Right? But I had grieved and I had moved on and I had gotten closure. So why did it hurt? Because the closed wound was reopened, that's why. She hadn't died. I was going to see her again. And then she did die. And I will never see her again.

I could tell Annabeth was trying not to stare at the soft steam coming from my face as fresh tears quickly evaporated, but she wasn't very good at it. She blushed and quickly looked away when she realized I had caught her staring, and I couldn't resist the small smile that tugged on the corners of my lips. Even when everything hurt, I had a friend that could make me smile. I guess as long as I had that, I'd be fine.

"You know," she said, speaking up. "You could probably have a pass from activities for the day if you..."

"No," I shook my head, forcing my voice to not break again. "I... It'll help me more if I can think of other things. Besides, I can't check on my brother later if I'm holed up in my bunk steaming my face with tears all day."

"I wanted to ask what that was about," Annabeth admitted.

"It's probably something to do with my powers," I said. This was a nice, safe topic. And it was one I found easy to talk about. Easier. "I can generate and control fire, and as a result I run at a much higher temperature than most people. I guess my body heat is enough to make small amounts of liquid evaporate on contact. It doesn't work if there's a lot of water, like if it's pouring down rain - and I try my absolute best to stay out of that kind of situation. Water's kind of my biggest weakness probably because my elemental affinity with fire. It physically hurts to be wet."

"That's..." Annabeth struggled to find the right word. "That's ridiculous! The boiling point of water is a hundred degrees Celsius. That's two hundred and twelve degrees Fahrenheit! The normal human body runs at ninety eight... You'd be dead if your body was putting off that much heat. Nobody would be able to touch you."

She grabbed my arm for emphasis before I could stop her.

"You're not hurt?" I asked, pulling away quickly. "How are...? You're not hurt?"

"You feel normal to me," she said. "Maybe a little warm. Like you spent the hottest part of the afternoon in direct sunlight, but otherwise normal. See? No burns."

She held up her hand to show that she was, in fact, not burned. I stared, not quite believing what I was seeing. Even Ari had recoiled as if she'd touch a hot stove when she made accidental contact with me after I'd had a burn. Admittedly I hadn't actually burned today, but my emotional state was such that I could feel the fire inside me roaring. Honestly now that I gave it some thought, I was surprised I hadn't erupted into flames. Not that I wasn't grateful - I would have hated myself for cooking Annabeth like a marshmallow. But still... As any Greek would tell you; if you got a gift horse, the very first thing you should do is look it in the mouth. You never knew if there was an army hiding inside it.

We spent the rest of the walk to Cabin Nine talking about less heavy topics, like how I worked with uncle Joe in his restaurant or how Annabeth had been coming to camp for six years now which made her one of the most senior campers around. Apparently only Andromeda and her brother Andros had been coming longer - by a year - and Luke had been with her when she'd first crossed Half-Blood Hill. The former counselor of Ten had been coming even longer than the twins, but I knew from Silena that she'd left part way through last Summer and hadn't returned this year.

Before I knew it, we were standing outside Cabin Nine.

"Thanks," I said. "For walking with me. And for talking..."

"Don't mention it," She smiled. "That's what friends are for, right?"

Friends. Her voice seemed to squeeze the very air from my lungs with that word alone.

"Yeah," I smiled back.

"But really, you probably should talk to Beckendorf about taking it easy for the rest of the day," she said. "I'm going to be checking in in the infirmary between activities anyway since I'm scheduled to help out. Besides, the healers say he shouldn't wake up for a few days at least but it will probably be my job to keep an eye on him either way. Not to mention you spent some time recovering in one of the sick beds just yesterday yourself. If you push yourself too much, you'll probably just end up in a bed next to him."

I wanted to argue, but knowing she would be there to check on him took the wind out of my sails. Instead I just nodded; "Okay, I'll try to take it easy. After my first forging lesson. Right now, it might help me to relax just as much to hit something a bunch of times with a heavy hammer."

"You're going to fit right in here," she laughed. "Alright, do your thing. I need to go get my own siblings up and running."

She gave me another quick hug before turning and running off across the commons toward her cabin. I stood watching as she left, waiting until she was inside and out of sight before turning to enter Nine. My heart was beating against my ribcage, and I told myself it was because I was excited to make something. I wasn't even sure if I believed that or not.