Chapter 3

Almost two hours passed, during which Emma sat motionless at the kitchen table. The food was long cold, but she hadn't felt hungry the whole time anyway. That Regina would run away had been clear to her, she just hadn't thought it would happen this way.

"Where's Mom?"

Emma winced as Henry's voice rang out to her from the doorway. "She's... I don't know. She poofed away as soon as I said it. I didn't even have time for any kind of explanation."

Slowly, Henry came into the room, leaned over to Emma, and took her tightly in his arms. "She'll calm down and then come back," it came from him as he stroked her back as she had usually done when he had been younger and she wanted to comfort him.

Without resistance, Emma leaned her head against her son's chest and took a deep breath. "Maybe it would have been better to just disappear for a while and not tell her anything."

"You can't be serious. She notices everything and I wouldn't have been able to hide it from her at some point. Besides, you need help."

Emma's gaze traveled upward before she shook her head vigorously. "No, I'll be fine."

Henry pulled up his mom's chair and took a seat on it so he could be eye level with Emma. "When I was upstairs, I read about your illness on the Internet."

Emma closed her eyes and continued to shake her head, but Henry didn't let that stop him and just kept talking.

"It said you'll be weakened and tired, and if you get chemotherapy, you'll get worse from the side effects. You can't do that all by yourself."

"I'm not dragging you guys into this. I told you because you're my family. But I'm not going to let you sacrifice yourselves for me, especially you," she countered, looking at him again. "And as for your mother, you see what's happening to her: Regina is not weak, but she has already lost too much in her life that was important to her. It's better if she turns her back on me, there'll be less collateral damage when I'm gone."

"Where do you think she went?" Henry asked, clearly not wanting to deal with the fact that Emma might die.

She shrugged and propped her head in her hand. "Maybe her vault?" she guessed, since it was the first place she could think of that was undisturbed.

"Do you want to go look for her?"

Emma hesitated for a moment. After all, Regina hadn't poofed out of the kitchen by accident, but because she needed her peace. "Want to, yeah, but I think we should give her the time she needs."

Henry nodded in agreement and his shoulders slumped slightly. "I'm going to bed then. Do you need anything else?"

Emma tilted her head slightly and a sad smile appeared on her lips. "What did I tell you? I don't want you to treat me any differently than before. So: sleep well!" Gently, she ran a quick hand through his hair, as she did every night and as he hated to do since he was all grown up and cool.

"Good night." Hesitantly, he got up and looked back at her at the door again before climbing upstairs.

Emma took a deep breath and let her head sink back into her palm. She was so tired, her head ached, and her battered body seemed to be pushing her down with weights. Still, she grabbed her smartphone and dialed Regina's number. As had been expected, only voicemail answered. "I won't come looking for you, just take your time," she spoke into the tape. "Just please take care of yourself and don't do anything stupid. I love you."

It was very rare for Emma to say the last sentence out loud. Most of the time it seemed corny for her to say it to Regina and she rather clarified the feelings she had for her with gestures. Besides, her friend knew how she felt about her that way too, at least Emma hoped so.

After hanging up, she cleaned up the kitchen and put the untouched food in the fridge, then went upstairs, brushed her teeth only quickly and slipped under the covers in her XXL sleeping shirt. Her thoughts spun endlessly in her head, but exhaustion finally took over and sent her into a deep sleep.

When Emma was awakened the next morning by the ringing of her alarm clock, the side of the bed next to her was still smooth and untouched. Sighing, she turned off the beeping of her smartphone and then swung her legs out of bed. Annoyed, she eyed the bruises that stretched from her ankles all the way up her thighs. She had to make sure Henry didn't get to see them, otherwise she had probably played soccer with him and his friends for the last time the previous day.

Already changed, Emma brushed her teeth a moment later and tied her hair into a knot at the nape of her neck that fit easily under her cap. "Good morning, Henry," she greeted her son, who was in the kitchen packing his lunch box into his school bag.

"Good morning. Is Mom..."

But Emma already interrupted the question with a shake of her head. "She's not back, no."

Henry nodded slowly, then eyed her gym shorts and the sweat jacket she was wearing. "You're not going jogging, are you?!"

Astonished, Emma looked up from the glass of milk she had just poured herself. "Of course I am. I go jogging every morning. Besides, maybe I'll meet Regina at Granny's, after all, she doesn't have coffee when she's not home and I don't bring her any," she explained as a matter of course, finishing the glass in a few swigs.

"But...you'll wear yourself out eventually."

"Henry!" Emma looked at her son admonishingly. "I thought we discussed this."

"You discussed this! I told you right away that I couldn't pretend that everything was great."

"Henry, let's not argue, please," the blonde rowed back, suddenly concerned that if she didn't, she might lose her son, too. "I'll be careful and take it slow, I promise."

"I'll go to the school. You need to find mom and talk to her, Emma. Make sure you talk to her today!" he implored her with a firm look, picked up his bag and left the house.

Emma winced slightly as the door slammed shut behind him and she was once again alone in the large mansion. He was well spoken; after all, she had tried to talk to Regina. Certainly, the conversation had not gone well, but there were not the right words for such a conversation anyway. The quick method had seemed the most humane to her.

Thoughtfully she slipped into her sneakers, locked the house and turned right behind the garden gate. From an initial brisk walk, Emma soon fell into her faster jogging rhythm and blanked out her surroundings. She only heard her own breaths and heartbeat and felt the pungent cold air in her lungs. Shortly after, she had reached the edge of the forest and turned back towards the main road. Just before she reached it, however, she paused at a bench where she did some stretching exercises and tried to catch her breath. Regina's horrified face flashed through her mind and made her close her eyes, but the result was that she only saw it more clearly in front of her.

Emma dropped onto the bench, regardless of the cold and wetness from the slight rubbing of the smooth wood, and when she had recovered her breath to some extent, called the town hall. After the twelfth ring, she hung up and stared ahead for a moment before calling Regina again on her cell phone. A short time later, Regina's voice informed her that she was currently unavailable and Emma hung up without leaving a message.

Instead of stopping at Granny's, as she had originally planned, she found herself at the cemetery ten minutes later, walking at a moderate pace across the lawn to the Mills' vault. Regina had long since adjusted the protection of her vault so that Emma could break through it, since she had no cell phone reception down there and would otherwise be unreachable. But even as Emma entered the burial chamber on the surface, it was clear to her that Regina had not been here for some time. There was a dried-up bouquet of flowers on her father's coffin, and had she entered the room, she would inevitably have left a trail of soil and leaves on the stone floor after the lawn was completely soaked from the rain of the last few days. However, the floor was spotlessly clean.

Emma stepped back outside and closed the door behind her. She felt dizzy and angry with herself and her body, she leaned her forehead against the carved wood for a moment. "Regina, where are you? I need you now," she whispered desperately, staring at the wallpaper on her phone that showed her, Regina and Henry having a wild pillow fight. It had been one of the rare evenings when her usually sovereign and correct friend had even allowed herself to leave the mayor in the office. However, a large part had probably also contributed Zelena, who had also taken the photo.

Emma raised her head and looked over the fog-shrouded tombstones to the far side of the fields beyond Storybrooke's rooftops. "Zelena," she muttered, shoving the phone into her jacket pocket and running off again.

Emma didn't even bother to wait until she could breathe properly again before knocking on the door of the farmhouse where Zelena lived with her daughter Robin. Impatiently she knocked again, although no one who had not already been waiting behind the door could have opened it so quickly.

Shortly after, the hinges moved and Zelena stuck her head out. Robin sat on her hip and played with a red curly strand of her mother's hair, who wore her hair down and was wrapped in an emerald green bathrobe. "What are you doing here?"

Emma was aware that Zelena and she had never been best friends, but since she was Regina's sister, at least they had spent time together from time to time over the past year and hadn't antagonized each other. "Good morning to you, too. Is she here?"

"Is who here?"

"My goodness, Zelena. You know exactly who I mean. Is your sister here?"

Zelena eyed her up and down, then lifted Robin onto her other hip before answering, "She doesn't want to see you."

"Fine, I want to see her though. You can tell her that last night was at least as hard for me as it was for her and that I can understand why she needed time. But I need to talk to her, we can't keep the situation quiet and hope that we'll find ourselves in a different reality then," it came heatedly from her.

"So now you're deciding when she's had enough time to herself?" Zelena asked with a raised eyebrow and curled lips.

"She's not the only one at issue here. If she doesn't want anything to do with it, then I have to accept that. But she'll still have to talk to me in return. After that, I'll pack my things and move out if that's what she wants."

"Then why don't you just do that and leave her alone, but..."

"Zelena, it's okay."

Emma's heart dropped when she heard Regina's voice coming from behind the only half-open door.

Zelena snorted and then retreated with her child to one of the adjoining rooms, while Regina took her place at the door.

Wordlessly, Emma eyed her girlfriend. Dark circles under her eyes marred her otherwise flawless face and dried tear tracks stretched down her cheeks. Her bloodshot eyes testified to very little sleep, and despite the fact that she was wearing one of Zelena's pajamas, her posture with her arms folded in front of her chest radiated vulnerability as well as rejection. No doubt she was trying to maintain her majestic posture.

"You're pale," was the first sentence to leave her quivering lips.

"Yes, well. I've been running halfway across town looking for you. That, and 'a decreased red blood cell count,' to quote Dr. Heart." Waiting to see if Regina would slam the door in her face, she looked at her.

"Who?"

"A specialist in oncology and hematology. Whale sent me to her when I came to him," she explained.

Regina was silent for a while. "Emma, I just couldn't yesterday..." She broke off and shook her head.

Emma ached to know that she was the reason why the usually iron woman completely lost her composure. "I know. And I understand, honestly. But I need to know where I stand. I just need that right now. A plan, knowing what's going to happen next."

Regina nodded, but couldn't look at her.

"Will you come home with me?" In a calm voice, Emma tried to reach her. "Please."

You could tell she was struggling. In her gaze, relief that Emma wanted to go home with her warred with fear of what she would learn from her in future conversations.

"I promise not to smother you, and if you need time, that's fine. But please don't run away from me. I... don't have anything contagious, you know?"

Tears spilled from Regina's eyes again in response before she stepped out the front door and wrapped her arms tightly around Emma. Her whole body shook from her attempts to suppress her sobs.

"You're only wearing pajamas, it's clearly too cold out here for that," Emma whispered in her ear after a while, but Regina hung so limply in her embrace and still hadn't regathered herself that Emma unceremoniously lifted her whole in her arms and carried her inside.

"Emma," a choked cry came from Regina after her friend kicked the front door shut behind them. "Put me down, I'm too heavy!"

"I've never had any trouble carrying you before," she reminded her with a grin, but set her down on the dresser in the hallway without breaking the hug. Gently stroking her back, she leaned her forehead against her girlfriend's. "Are you coming home with me?" she then repeated her question in a whisper, looking into her eyes.

Regina returned the look and finally nodded slowly. "What about Henry?"

"He's at school."

"I know, but...what will he say?"

Seeing that the thought almost made Regina shed new tears again, Emma shook her head. "I can tell you this: He wants a first aid course and information on all eventualities." Seeing Regina's questioning look, she continued. "I've already told him, and he's taken it relatively well."

"Unlike me, you mean." Self-hatred resonated in her voice and she looked away from her.

Emma didn't let that happen, however, and gently turned her head back to herself with her hand on her chin. "No, that's not what I mean. No one is telling you how to feel or how painful the experience is for you. It hurts me to see you so broken, but it also tells me how you feel about me, and that's more than I ever dreamed. And you know I mean that and I would never say something so cheesy if it wasn't true."

Regina had to laugh and Emma did the same.

"Let's go home," Regina finally nodded and slid off the dresser. "I'll just get my things and say goodbye to Zelena."

Emma nodded and then watched her go before looking around the sparsely lit hallway while she waited.

"Don't make her unhappy."

Emma winced when she suddenly heard Zelena's voice behind her and turned to face her. The hostility was gone from her tone and look, and she simply looked concerned.

"I don't plan to."

Zelena eyed her for a while and then crossed her arms in front of her chest, "I'm sorry you're sick."

Emma's lips twisted into a wry grin and she shrugged. "I've always been first in line when there were crappy situations to hand out. Only so far, I've been able to fight most battles by sheer force of will or muscle."

"You guys are always welcome here. You know that, right?" Zelena asked hesitantly.

Emma laughed out loud. "Well, at least Regina is, I suppose."

"Since when are you so vindictive?" Zelena snorted.

"I'm not. It was more of an observation after you came close to blowing up the doorstep I was standing on earlier."

"You hurt her, and it's my duty as a big sister to protect her. I will always be on her side, you should know that. And if she says she wants to be alone, I'll drive away anyone who doesn't respect that and gets too close to her."

Emma nodded. "And you have no idea how glad I am that she has you. Thank you for taking such care of her. I hope you always will and that you'll be there to pick her up when I can't."

The two women looked earnestly into each other's eyes and before Zelena could give her an answer, Regina joined them in the hallway fully dressed in the sweatsuit she had put on the night before. "I'm ready."

Emma nodded and extended her hand to Zelena to shake it goodbye.

After Regina also said goodbye to her sister with a hug, she and Emma left the farm and walked arm in arm down the narrow dirt road.

"Can you poof us?" Emma suggested a moment later, feeling Regina shiver. "You don't have a proper jacket thanks to your hasty departure, and I'm only dressed for jogging, too."

"If it's all right with you," Regina nodded, taking her girlfriend by the hands before her spell deposited them both in front of their house.

Gasping, Emma fell to her knees and held her head, barely allowing the magical purple mist to completely dissipate.

"Emma? What's wrong with you?" Panicked, Regina grabbed her by the shoulders from behind.

"I..." She took a deep breath to stop the spinning in front of her eyes and endure the sudden, stabbing headache. "I don't know. Maybe your spell?"

"My spell? I could do that in my sleep, I didn't do anything wrong!" Regina said in horror.

Emma smiled reassuringly at her and scrambled back to her feet. "I hadn't assumed that either. But I stopped poofing a while ago because I felt bad every time afterwards. I thought doing magic was just too taxing on my body considering my condition, but apparently it's the spell itself, no matter who's doing it." Again, she ran her hand over her forehead and straightened her shoulders. "Don't worry about it, I'm fine. Just... let's not do the magic location change thing in the future, please, okay?"

Regina could only nod hesitantly. She was afraid that Emma was lying to her and it wasn't true that she was fine again, but she still had too little information to be sure, so she silently followed her into the house nervously.