It was barbaric to suck women into corsets, but Lily said nothing as she was clenched into one. Mostly because she knew no amount of arguing would matter, but also because the sooner she was ready to go the quicker she could get the evening over with.
Her father had insisted that this year she had to be brought out into society. Lily had craftily swindled her sister's courtship and wedding to her favor for three seasons. 'oh, father It's Petunia's time to shine,' 'oh father I couldn't possibly take away from Petunia's wedding.' But now that Petunia was settled into her marriage Lily's excuses had run dry and it was time for her to at the very least pretend to have intentions for courting.
Though, in truth, she had no intention to be married.
What Lily wanted more than anything else was to be a governess. To raise children but to have time on her own to pursue her own interests like botonny and reading. It wasn't the most glamourous career but for a woman it was the only one she was allowed to have, and anything was better than being trapped in a loveless marriage.
She watched her mother cater to her father. Live, breathe, exist for her father. And though she loved her father, she couldn't think of anything less satisfying than living for another person, especially when it wasn't out of real love but duty, and societal expectations.
Even Petunia married for what worked on parchment.
Vernon was successful in his investments and handled money well to the point where Petunia could live the life she wanted. But he was also insufferable, dull, and truly believed himself to be the most interesting person in every room. But that was what made her sister happy and therefore she accepted that. Lily simply was in a different position with everything.
Petunia had spent too much money on her wedding and now with her father's declining health he didn't have the energy to recover enough for Lily to have a reasonable dowry. That meant that she couldn't marry based on love but who could afford her. And Lily knew what pool that was. She had seen the way Marlene McKinnon's fiancée's eyes wander. She had seen the marks on Andromeda Avery from her cruel husband, marks that no one would dare mention to them or do anything about. Lily didn't want to live that way.
Instead, she would honor her father's wishes by finishing the season. And then when he passed, she would take a governess job and quietly slip away. In order to do that though, Lily had to make sure that she wasn't a contender for the season. Many girls went through a few seasons before they found a suitor. Lily simply was insuring she was one of them. Though she doubted it would be that difficult.
Lily picked a dress that was larger than she was, unflatteringly tucked at the waist in a ghastly shade of tangerine that took away any natural color from her skin making her look a touch ill. Then she made sure her copper hair was too curled, so it sat on her pale face versus faming it.
It might not have been enough for a man desperate for a wife. But it was enough that she would be no one's first, second, or third pick. Which should have been enough of a stall for no one to bother with her this season.
When she came down the stairs, Petunia was thankfully too busy fixing her own lavender dress and Vernon's too-tight jacket to pay her any attention. It wasn't until they were in the carriage away from the house that her sister's beady pale blue eyes narrowed on her.
"What on earth are you wearing?" Petunia scoffed. "You look like a pumpkin … why did the seamstress pick that color?"
"I asked her to show me her least used fabrics," Lily smiled at her innocently. "Why waste them?"
Petunia hissed at her, craning her overly long neck, "if you embarrass me this season-"
"Relax, Lady Dursley. With me looking like this then all the attention can go on you like it should."
It was remarkable how quickly Petunia turned from annoyance to pride. All it took was the titled of her name said in that reverence before she beamed and let go of the whole topic altogether.
Lily, however, wasn't remotely surprised.
Ever since they were little Lily was always thought to be the prettier of the two and as they aged the comparison only became more evidently slanted in her favor. Petunia was always too lanky, with a long face and lantern jaw that opposed her wispy blonde hair. Whereas Lily had thick dark red hair, bright green eyes and a more proportional figured.
Lily always would stay in Petunia's good graces by downplaying her own attributes and boosting Petunia's. Her sister wanted Lily to get married to someone that would keep up their social standing but not compete with her own. A feat that was literally impossible to manage. Lily nearly told her sister not to worry on a number of occasions but held her tongue.
She knew her sister did not wish to take her on in the event of their father's death. Lily also did not wish to live with Vernon and Petunia. Not only would they criticize her every move if she lived with them, but Petunia would take great pride in picking the most incompatible match for Lily given the opportunity. Lily, however, knew that if she told her sister of her plan her sister would simply speed up the process and find a man for her immediately as Petunia would never allow her sister to risk the family status and be the worst thing possible, a spinster.
Little did Petunia know; nothing would go the way she wanted it to.
As they left the carriage and went into the Black Estate, Lily trailed behind Vernon and Petunia, hiding behind them quite well as she observed the room.
Most of the ton was focused on the most popular women of the ton; Narcissa Malfoy, Marlene McKinnon and Countess Rosier.
Narcissa and the Countess were social climbing snobs, who frequently enjoyed dropping things in the weekly paper as 'unnamed sources,' for the gossip column. Marlene, on the other hand, was one of the few friendly faces in the ton.
The Evans were new money and were treated as such. The McKinnon's were not. They were prominent and could trace their family line back generations despite their lack of title. Lily often was surprised she and Marlene had struck up such a friendship but when she had found the statuesque blonde hiding away in their library after a dinner party, they became fast friends.
Marlene too despised the whole social scene but unlike Lily, she had younger sisters and therefore needed to perform well socially as to not stunt her sister's prospects.
Lily often pitied her.
It was one thing to have to look out for oneself but quite another to not every conversation could make or break her entire family line.
Even as she watched her across the room Lily didn't dare approach her. Marlene had the type of effortless beauty that compelled attention, and there was nothing the women of the ton hated more than someone that appeared like they didn't have to try.
Lily had the benefit of standing slightly behind Vernon's dumpy form where she knew no one would find her. For over an hour she stood there, silently taking in who seemed to be lingering on who without a worry in the world.
She almost got away with it too, until Vernon made a decision he had never made before, he asked Petunia to dance.
At first, Lily smiled at the gesture.
It was nice that despite his entire essence he had the capability of being sweet with his wife. However, the second Vernon left, a small beagle puppy came taring through the room.
Normally Lily wouldn't have gotten involved, but when she saw people chasing the dog, her instinct to grab it won out. It wasn't until she picked it up and started petting it that she realized to whom the animal belonged to.
Her body stilled as she looked down at the pathetically adorable face of Edmond, newest crowned dog of the crown. Lily's emerald eyes flashed up to see if she could return him without a scene. He was so cute, already cuddling into her as if he knew she was a friendly face.
The last thing she expected was to find the royal guard standing in front of her with the queen just behind them, taking her in.
"I…" Lily began before she bowed to the queen and walked the dog over. "He must have been eager to join the festivities," then she waited for someone to put out their arms to take the dog. She didn't want to presume the queen carried him, but she also didn't want to disrespect her by not handing her the dog. It was a horrific stand still that made her flush and her stomach flip over itself many times.
"He is," Queen Irma said, the smallest of smiles on her aged face. "Come stand with me, Edmond likes a good view."
Lily followed her to the side of the room until they reached the center. All the color she had worked so hard to keep from her face came rushing to the surface as all eyes in the room zeroed in on her.
She kept her eyes on Edmond, petting him as she prayed everyone would discuss how the Queen saw her as a servant or was talking to her out of pity.
The Queen whispered to her as the dancing started up again, "you're fooling no one my dear. You can do what you'd like to your hair, to your dress but … beauty once noticed is not as easily hidden… Though you did an earnest effort with that ungodly dress."
Lily could not scowl at the queen. The only thing she could do was stand there and occasionally pet the dog that seemed perfectly content to cuddle into her.
After a half hour or so, Queen Irma gestured with her long, elegant fingers for one of the guards to take the dog. She was partially relieved to get a break but the other part of her felt lost without something to focus on.
And then she heard a male voice say, "your highness. I was hoping for a dance with Lady Lily."
Lily bowed before she looked, but she was sure whoever it was didn't know who she was an hour earlier. When her eyes lifted, she was annoyed when she saw it was Viscount Potter who had come to request a dance.
He was close friends with the heir of the ancient and noble Black family, Prince Sirius.
She had seen him around all her life, smirking, drawing attention to himself around town. In one situation, he ruthlessly picked on a boy she lived down the road from. He was a poor boy, working to make ends meet, and he and the prince mercilessly teased him.
Lily knew the man was a boy then, barely eleven years of age but his character was clear then and as she saw the arrogant look plastered on his good-looking face, she could see it just as clearly now.
He thought he was a catch because he had windswept black hair and a pleasant smile, but Lily knew different. And so, she had no guilt as she said, "My apologies sir, but my dance card is full," Lily said, showing him the dance card she'd meticulously filled out herself in case of an emergency.
Surprise flicker in his hazel eyes as he stood there a little speechless.
"But I'm sure Lady Emmeline or Lady Daisy will be more than happy for you to tour them around the dancefloor," Lily told him in the nicest tone she could muster.
"I will see if they can spare me the pity," James teased with a smile she was sure had won him many in return, but hers was hollow and superficial.
"Best of luck to you," Lily bowed again as he bowed back and walked away.
She had nearly forgotten the Queen was next to her until the white-haired woman snickered next to her. Then she told her, "go along to your sister. I look forward to seeing you at the Lestrange Ball."
Lily bit her lip and bowed, "your highness." Then she went to her sister as fast as humanly possible.
Petunia wore her smiles and enjoyed all the renewed attention in her as a byproduct of Lily's newfound popularity. The instant they were alone in the carriage, Petunia scoffed, "I cannot believe you did that."
Lily bit her lip and looked out the window.
She too could not believe that she had spoken to the queen or started such a stir. Her only saving grace was that she had not danced with the Viscount and after her rejection she felt confident the question wouldn't be asked again. He might even imply to others something was wrong with her and save her the trouble of ruining her own prospects.
"At least it did not cause a scandal. Unlike the McKinnon girl," Petunia scoffed.
Lily's eyes snapped onto her sister's. "What do you mean? I did not hear anything."
"You were talking the Viscount…" Petunia said bitterly before a sneer crept onto her face. "Her engagement to Gideon Prewett is broken and now he is to be wed to Emmeline Vance."
"She was wearing the ring tonight," Lily said in confusion.
Vernon said, "Not anymore."
"… do we know why?" Lily asked her sister, fearing the worst.
"They were caught in a closed room necking, can you imagine?" Petunia gossiped, her cheeks rosy from a mixture of the alcohol and excitement.
Lily frowned thinking of her friend, unsure if this was a bad thing or not. Marlene had always seemed to tolerate Gideon but have no real affection for him.
"Is this going to look bad on Marlene?" Lily asked them, hoping it would reflect negatively on the other couple and not Marlene.
Vernon scoffed, "who would want a woman that couldn't keep her husband?"
Lily glowered at him.
Of course, Vernon would blame Marlene. He thought everything in the world that happened was a woman's fault. She'd even heard him once say women make too much of a fuss about childbirth after he stubbed his toe and had to be waited on the rest of the day for his 'injury.'
"Now, Lily, I want you to stay away from her. You already brought enough attention on yourself tonight with chasing that dog in that ridiculous dress," Petunia told her as the carriage stopped.
Lily said, "I wouldn't think twice about it," then the second Petunia and Vernon were in the house Lily hopped out of the carriage and walked the block and half to Marlene's house.