"As your exclusive boyfriend, I have a request."

Izzy's eyes went wide in shock. Her mind frozen, stunned by his choice of words, she raised her head to look at him.

"What's that?" Izzy whispered, unable to keep her voice calm.

"Kiss me," Simon whispered. Without waiting for an answer, he moved forward, right hand outstretched. Izzy closed her eyes, unable to truly process what had just happened as she allowed Simon to kiss her. It was a gentle kiss, soft and short. Then he laid his head down on the pillows again. Izzy kept her eyes closed, reveling in the moment. She hadn't realized how much she'd missed him.

When she did open her eyes, Simon was staring at her. It was strange. The way he was looking at her now, both scared and excited her. Deciding to give in to what she wanted, Izzy leaned forward to kiss him again, deeper this time. She felt his right bandaged hand touch her face, sending a shiver down her back.

"Ow," Simon mumbled, and Izzy lept back.

"What?" she began. "What hurts?

"Nothing," he smiled, the pain gone from his face. "I tried to use the arm I'm not suppose to."

Slowly, Izzy relaxed. She moved closer, watching his face carefully.

"Don't be so cautious," Simon whined. "Come here."

"I don't want to hurt you," Izzy replied softly.

"Then come here," Simon said firmly as he gestured for her to move around the bed to his right side. Slowly, Izzy walked to the other side of the hospital bed as Simon was moving over making space. He patted the space on his right, inviting her to lay beside him. Slowly, carefully, Izzy did as he asked, laying down. Simon rested his head on her shoulder and was asleep in seconds.

It was like nothing she'd experienced before. Just laying here, Simon asleep next to her. Everything was so calm, the only sound was Simon's even breathing and the continue beating of the machines hooked up to him.

Despite the calmly environment, Izzy's mind was anything but peaceful. She kept running through the last few minutes over and over trying to make sense of them. Wasn't this really sudden? After all, he'd once dumped her in a text, and now he wanted to pick up where they'd left off just like that? Though she supposed it was different if he really meant what he'd said about being her boyfriend. But then again, why hadn't he told her before now!

How long had it been since she'd met this boy in that elevator? It had been during her spring break, so March, a year ago? No, that wasn't right. It was October now, so more like a year and a half. All that time, and it was only now that Simon wanted her. It didn't make sense… unless it did.

"Izzy," Simon mumbled.

"I'm here," she said. "Go back to sleep." She stroked his face, unable to keep a hold on her emotions despite her doubts. Simon turned to face her, his eyes pensive, studying her.

"You're different," he said.

"No, I'm not," Izzy denied quickly.

"It's that mask of yours," Simon said, before yawning. "Despite our history, you were always at arm's length, walls up."

"You my friend, are on very powerful painkillers," Izzy reminded him.

"Boyfriend," Simon corrected her.

"As I said, drugs," Izzy replied, smiling. She could keep up appearances until he was feeling better, right? It would only hurt her after all, and that was okay. She could deal with that afterwards.

Simon studied her for a long moment before speaking. "And there it is again," he said. "Shields up." He was smiling for a moment, but then stopped his eyes focused. "Urg," he groaned. "I don't have the energy for this right now. Can't you just believe me?"

"I do believe you," Izzy said smiling, trying to make him happy.

"If that were true, those walls wouldn't be back," Simon grumbled, but his eyes closed almost against his will and he rested his head on her shoulder again. She'd thought he'd fallen asleep until suddenly he spoke. "I want all you mine," he whispered. "All mine."

Despite the awkward slurred way he spoke, she couldn't stop her heart from reacting to the words themselves. If he wasn't sincere, this was torture. She decided in that moment, drug induced or not, Izzy was going to be his until the time came when he realized she wasn't enough. If this ended badly, it would broke her already shattered heart, but Izzy didn't have the strength to fight anymore. Instead, she closed her eyes and enjoyed the warm presence of her boyfriend beside her.

To her great surprise, she fell asleep. Upon waking, she was surprised she hadn't been kicked out by the nurses when she realized the lateness of the hour. Simon was still sleeping beside her. Izzy turned to stroke his face before getting up and leaving the room. She'd come back again soon, but for the moment, she needed her own bed and a shower.

Taking a cab home, Izzy walked in and quickly checked that Maia was sleeping before getting into the shower. Washing away the dirt and sweat of her rather strange day, Izzy got out and laid face down in bed. She was so tired she could hardly keep a thought in her head. The world could wait until tomorrow.

Izzy awoke to the sound of her alarm clock. Knowing she'd gotten less than five hours sleep, Izzy decided she didn't need to go to class today. Turning her alarm off, she rolled over and went back to sleep. When she finally got out of bed it was after eleven, and she decided to at least go to her afternoon class. Not bothering to dress as she usually would, likely due to exhaustion, Izzy went out in sweatpants and a sweater, yawning the whole way. She sat in the back, and tried to take notes while wondering if maybe she should have just given up on this class today as well.

Her commitments for the day either totally neglected or over with, Izzy got out her phone and called her brother.

"Oh, hi Iz," Alec's voice greeted her.

"Why didn't you tell me Simon was in the hospital?" Izzy snapped.

"I'm really sorry," Alec said. "It's been wedding maddness. If it wasn't for mom and dad, I think I'd take Magnus up on his eloping idea. It just slipped my mind, besides you two aren't close anymore are you?"

Izzy hung up the phone. She didn't really want to have that conversation with Alec at the moment. Her almost relationship might be nothing but drug induced, and her brother was getting married. Izzy loved Alec, but that didn't mean he was off the hook for turning her into a crazy woman who runs to hospitals in a mad panic. Of course, Alec didn't know about him, so her brother wouldn't have known she'd react the way she had. Even so, Izzy had decided she was going to be grumpy about this for at least a few more days. Then again, she supposed Maia could have said something as well. Okay, maybe it didn't matter. Either way, it was past time for Izzy to get back to the hospital.

The whole way there she wasn't sure what she was going to say, or why she was so nervous. Simon would still be high on painkillers, so she had nothing to be nervous about.

When Izzy passed the nurses station, she noticed one nurse in particular. The woman's name tag read 'Holly' and she was walking over to Izzy.

"You must be Simon's girlfriend, Izzy right?" Holly said. Izzy nodded, as she thought it easier than trying to explain the overly complicated truth to this stranger. "He's been asking for you all morning. I think he expected you to be here when he woke up."

"I didn't think I was allowed to sleep here," Izzy explained.

"You aren't," Holly said with a smile and a wink. "But you looked so peaceful, I just couldn't make you leave. Besides, it wasn't like he wasn't getting his rest with you there." She smiled again, the slight change in her facial muscles somehow showing the kindness in her eyes. Izzy could sense genuine caring from this woman, and she had to admire that. She was tall and beautiful, with an oval face and long light brown, almost blonde hair.

"Thanks," Izzy said. "He's in the same room right?" Holly nodded and Izzy turned to head back down the hall she'd sprinted through yesterday. When she entered Simon's room he was laying in bed, looking bored with a remote in his good hand. When he saw her his eyes lit up, and she couldn't help but smile back.

"You're back," Simon said, relief in his voice.

"The nurse said you were asking for me?" Izzy replied.

"I remember falling asleep next to you," Simon said, as he turned off the tv. "But then you were gone when I woke up. For a moment I thought I'd dreamed you up, but Holly remembered you."

Izzy giggled, moving closer. "Surely you could have come up with a better dream than me," she smiled.

"That's one," Simon said firmly, as if telling her off.

"One what?" Izzy scoffed.

"One thing you've said to put yourself down," Simon replied. "It's a pattern I've noticed with you.

"Does that mean this is a three strikes you're out situation?" Izzy asked, trying to smile.

"That's two," Simon said firmly. Then he gestured to the space beside him. "Come sit with me." Izzy wasn't sure what Simon meant by this counting, nevertheless she moved closer, sitting at the end of the bed.

"There's nothing on tv," Simon sighed, leaning against her. "Hospitals are boring."

"Scary," Izzy corrected him. "Hospitals are scary."

"Is that why you left last night?" Simon asked.

"Honestly," Izzy said sheepishly. "I was super uncomfortable and really needed to shower." Simon's laughter was light with relief, and it made her feel safer.

"Ow," Simon whined. "I still shouldn't laugh." He paused, turning to face her. "But I'm glad you didn't get cold feet." Izzy didn't say anything. She wanted to enjoy the moment, so she closed her eyes and laid her head near his, enjoying the comfort of his presence without thinking about how long it would last.

"Three," Simon whispered, a moment later. Izzy stiffened, her muscles tense. Now was she out?

Simon sighed and sat up in bed, facing her. Izzy did the same, nervously. Now, she was looking right into his eyes.

"I know you Isabelle Lightwood," Simon said slowly. "I thought I did before, but since you arrived here yesterday, I've figured a few things out that helped me put all the pieces together. From your actions and the way you've responded… well I want you to tell me what's going on. Please tell me why there's a sadness behind your eyes?"

Izzy didn't quite know how to phrase what she was thinking into words, to do so made them feel stupid and frivolous, but they were huge to her. And yet, if she couldn't speak them out loud, how would she ever know if they were real.

"I'm broken," Izzy whispered after what felt like the longest moment of silence of her life. "You're hurt and high, you can't really want me. You believe you want me now, but- you won't… I mean eventually… I won't be good at this."

Simon leaned his head back, eyes closed and Izzy wondered if his injuries were hurting him. He looked almost like he was in pain.

"Does it hurt?" Izzy asked, her hands flailing trying to help. "Do you need more meds?"

"Yes and no," Simon said simply, his eyes still focused on the ceiling. "I can see that you're scared," Simon continued in a calm voice, still addressing the ceiling. "And I can almost understand why, but that doesn't mean it doesn't suck to hear you say that." Simon turned to look at her, his expression open as he spoke. "Do you remember the way you kissed me in that elevator? Well I do. I know it meant little to you, but it was quite a moment for me. And then to be with you again, more than before, and more than once. I learned a great deal. You fixed me, healed what Clary broke. It's true I was happy with our arrangement for a while. I'm not really sure when that changed, but I remember perfectly the moment I realized it had changed." He paused as if watching for her reaction, but Izzy's thoughts were frozen, trying to take in his words.

"You'd came home and been surprised I was there," Simon began again. "I remember kissing you, in a vain hope to hold you there with me, but of course you didn't. I used to think of you as a force of nature, something I could touch but never hold. Watching you in that red dress about to leave to meet up with some other guy twisted something inside of me. I didn't tell you then how I felt because I was sure you didn't feel the same. What pains me now is that you don't, or maybe can't believe me when I say that I want you, that I care about you. I have thought of you often, and I feel certain somehow even if you leave me right now that won't change."

As he'd spoke, Simon's every movement had echoed his sincerity. Izzy was breathless. Simon was either the best lair in the world, or he was sure there was truth to his words.

"If you still doubt me, then just go," Simon said, sorrowfully, turning away slightly. "I want all or nothing. I've been on the receiving end of only parts of a real relationship too many times now to ever do it again."

Slowly, her heart pounding like never before, Izzy got up off the bed. Leaning over Simon's right side, Izzy moved closer still. Shutting her eyes she touched her lips to his in the most tender kiss of her life. She'd forgotten what it felt like to be free of the doubt, to have the weight of it lifted off her chest. Izzy's chest rose and fell, suddenly unrestricted. It was like, for this moment, she could see herself as he saw her, could see the truth in his eyes. Maybe she wasn't as broken as she'd believed. Simon made her want to be more, to be better. She wanted to be worth the adoration in his eyes.

"I believe you," Izzy whispered as she pulled out of the kiss. "My boyfriend has never lied to me." She saw Simon's face relax, the pain in his eyes ease. He motioned once again for her to lay down beside him. Izzy easily settled into the circle of his arms - or in this case arm - as his left one was stuck in a sling.

Simon told her where the remote was, and they spent a while flipping through channels together, but Simon had been right when he'd said there was nothing on tv. They ended up on some lame cooking channel, and spent more time making fun of it than actually watching the show. When someone came in to bring Simon his dinner, Izzy had been expecting to be kicked out, but it turned out to be Holly. Izzy couldn't help but smile when the kind motherly nurse pretended she wasn't there.

Izzy did end up leaving for an hour or so to pick up something for herself for dinner and collect a few things. When she returned with a burger, fries, and a deck of cards, they passed the time playing go fish. As the sun set, Izzy fell asleep beside her boyfriend, and didn't wake until the dawn.

Guest Review:
The name of the driver is Faith, the same name as Jace's FWB back then. Maybe your favorite name.

My Reply:
I was just using Faith for the name for the overlying 'this was meant to be' feeling of the scene. He was struck by Faith and it lead him to Izzy. I searched my story and couldn't find another character named Faith. Jace's FWB? I had to google the meaning of that. Do you mean Trinity? Jace's friends with benefits was Trinity the divorced women he was sleeping with.

Guest Review:
I just want to say thank you for the consistent updates and may your inspiration to write never stops. You're making many readers happy by sharing your talent and your wonderful story.
Thank you especially for the Clace chapters and at the same time I enjoyed every other non-Clace ones. Just reading about simple things they do and how at ease they are combined with solid trust with each other is making my heart swell every time. The Clace is young and they have so much to enjoy without kid's yet. Maybe they'll change their minds about kids in the future. They are blessings but blessings to be nurtured.
Again my heartfelt thanks and just giving you back the way I can for how much you gave us. Stay amazing.

My Reply:
Wow this made my day! I do try to update consistently though I used to update faster…. I have been slacking off lately. I am lucky to have such wonderful readers!
Oh I have plans for Clace. Hehe I am just laying the groundwork. ^_^ I can tell you this though. They aren't going to change their minds.
Thank you so much! I really do appreciate every review no matter how many there are already for this story. Leaving a review does really give back so thank you with the power of a thousand burning suns. :D

Mridula R (Guest) Review:
Finalllllllllly ! * fangirl screams over Sizzy * Someone broke Izzy's heart? Now I get it. Oooh is it Raphael? I dunno but dude Omg u knw abt what happened to d Mad World story! For d first few weeks I was like something is wrong with what I'm doing and gave up hope. But why did she delete if I many knw pls - bcus I held that story at a personal level and it was so near completion - I just don't get it. The writer was busy I get it but she didn't even offer an explanation? I need to know pls

My Reply:
It seems like at least every dozen chapters or so, someone mentions me adding Raphael. I really don't get that character though. He seemed like such a secondary, unimportant one in the books to me anyway. I barely noticed him when I read the books, then I discovered he had this huge online fandom, and I was like huh? Lol. Anyway I can tell you for certain that Raphael never appears in my TMI fanfics. I think I mentioned him in this story once in passing as the background of Lily's character who is only there to be background for Maia's character. Lol… Hmmm I'm not sure if I will ever reveal details about what happened to Izzy before… we shall see where the story takes us. You readers give me too much credit saying I know everything that's going to happen before it does. Some things I plan for AGES then change my mind last minute. Like with Simon's car accident. A car accident was always planned to be the reason Sizzy finally talked, but originally I had planned for Izzy to get hit then as the story progressed it made more sense to do it the other way around. :D

I consider the writer of 'Mad World' a dear friend, so I won't upload her explanation publically. Just know that she had personal reasons for getting rid of everything, and it isn't coming back. She didn't just delete the story, she stopped all contact with people she's met on fanfic, people like me. I have been the beta for that story since before she uploaded chapter one, and I'm very sad to see it all gone. In fact, the character Holly in these last two chapters is a tribute to her that she will never read as she's stopped using fanfic all together.

Sneak Peek Chapter 105

"I know that look."

Alec's mind was miles away but in front of him he was see the foe brick of their living room walls. He knew speaking voice almost better than his own. Slowly, as if coming out of a daze, Alec turned from the stone design to look into the eyes of the one he loved most.

"There's no look," Alec said.

"Oh yes there is," Magnus replied firmly. "And that's it. So what's wrong?"

Alec sighed, leaning over to kiss his fiance, being laying back on the couch to gaze at the ceiling.

"Nothing," Alec replied, with a sigh. "Just worried about Izzy. She sounded strange on the phone today."

"You worry too much," Magnus offered as Alec felt his fiance's gentle touch on his cheek. Closing his eyes Alec smiled.

"That isn't news," Alec whispered.

"Indeed," Magnus's voice was soft and loving. "Always thinking of others. It's one of your more annoying qualities actually."

"Pfft," Alec scoffed, lifting his head to face Magnus. "Is not."

"Is so," Magnus countered. "I'm selfish you know."

"Come again?" Alec asked with a shake of his head. "What does that have to do with me worrying?"