Maia watched Jordan leave, feeling like the worst person in the world. She knew she should have stopped herself before things got out of hand. She knew she should have understood her own heart sooner. She knew it was her fault, and she knew what she needed to do next.

After a shower, Maia collected her purse and headed out. As she walked, her mind went round and round everything that had happened, like the most depressing broken record of all time. She couldn't blame this on alcohol or intoxication. She had no excuses or rationalizations to cling to. She'd finally told him the truth and he'd responded by… by what? Cheating on his girlfriend with her? Or was it kinder to say he'd responded by pulling her close? Either way, Maia had turned the kindest, sweetest person in the whole world into a cheater, and she hated herself for it.

What she couldn't hate or regret was touching him again. It had been wonderful to be held in his arms once more. The extreme feeling had made it very obvious that she'd missed him far more than she'd realized.

Oh, why had she been so stupid!? She regretted losing him more in this moment than she ever had before. If she'd only been aware of her own emotions before it was too late. If she'd dug down deep during even one of those moments when he'd worn his heart bravely on his sleeve, then maybe things would be different.

Then again, maybe she was thinking about this from the bias point of view of right now. After all, hindsight is 20/20. Who she was then could not have realized what she knew now. She could remember how she'd felt then, how cautious she'd been towards him. Then the moment he's lost to her all these feelings come flooding back. Shouldn't this just prove that it wasn't a good idea? Maybe what made their fights so intense was also what gave them such bright sparks. A self destructive combination to say the least.

By the time she reached the store, Maia was determined to pretend the whole thing never happened unless Jordan brought it up first, and from the way he'd ran off, she didn't think he would. It was best to just move forward, and not focus on her moment of weakness. She had no right to expect him to end his relationship for her and she wasn't about to ask. In order to put this behind her she had one more thing to do. Walking forward, Maia took a deep breath and then asked the lady behind the Pharmacy counter for Plan B.

"Have you ever used a morning after pill before?" she asked.

"No," Maia replied.

"Okay wait here," she said. "You will need to talk to a Pharmacist."

So Maia waited, and then she was treated to education about the drug she was purchasing. The side effects didn't sound fun at all, but she had no choice. The deed was done, and now it was time to face the music. After paying far too much for one tiny pill, Maia stuffed the rather large box into her purse and turned to leave. Then she stopped cold as she recognized someone she knew. Panicking, Maia turned and ducked into an aisle, hoping he hadn't seen her.

"Oh, hey Maia!"

Her hope died quickly as she heard his voice calling after her. Plastering a smile on her face, Maia turned to face him.

"I thought that was you," he said with a genuine smile, unlike the fake mess on her face.

"You caught me," Maia said, trying to keep her voice light.

"If I didn't know better, I'd say you were hiding from me," he replied, still teasing her.

"But you know better than that," Maia teased back, trying to be normal.

"Of course, boss," he laughed. "I know you are definitely hiding from someone. It just can't possibly be me since I'm awesome." Maia couldn't help laughing. 'Boss' was a nickname he'd started using for her the day she'd met him. Jamie was the newest hire at the grocery store where Maia worked, and even though he was over a foot taller than her and ten times stronger, she's been asked to train him. Jamie had thought this so funny he'd taken to calling her boss, even after his training ended. There was something about a strong, super tall guy calling out 'boss' and having a tiny little woman answer, that Jamie thought was hilarious. Maia had never really thought of herself as tiny until she's stood next to him.

"I haven't trained you for months now," Maia reminded him. "You really should stop calling me boss."

"Okay, Boss," Jamie laughed. Maia groaned and he added, "So are you going to tell me who you're hiding from?"

"The boogeyman," Maia said with as straight a face as she could. Jamie laughed in that big loud bear way he always did. He had a bear quality to him, but once you got to know him, you realized it was more like a teddy bear. He had thick black hair that he liked to wear long, and his skin, though not as dark as hers, wasn't pale either.

Just then they were interrupted by a cell phone. Checking hers automatically, Maia saw nothing and concluded that someone was trying to contact Jamie.

"Urg," Jamie groaned, looking down at his phone. "Teasing you will have to wait, but only till work tomorrow. See you then." And with a wave, Jamie turned and walked away. Maia breathed a sigh of relief.

Jamie was one of her favourite co-workers - she even considered him a friend separate from work - but right now she wanted to be alone. Moving quickly out of the store, Maia made her way home. It was good to be alone with her thoughts again, but at the same time, she missed the distraction Jamie had provided.

Maia tried not to think on the walk home. Not thinking turned out to be rather harder than she'd thought it would be, but still a relief from her ever spiraling thoughts. It took all of her focus not to focus on anything. Walking in her front door, Maia called out to her roommates but received no answer. Thanking her lucky stars for the privacy, Maia poured herself a glass of water before opening the box. Inside was a great deal of empty space, and one small white pill in a foil. Pushing the pill from the foil, Maia placed it in her mouth and swallowed it down with her water.

She then flattened the box, pulling it apart a little so it would better fit into the bottom of the garbage can, under everything else. Maia didn't fancy having to deal with her roommates questions if someone found the box. It was easier to just hide everything.

Once she was done, and all the evidence cleared away, Maia felt strangely empty. She sat at the table, staring blankly forward. She knew there was one other thing she should do, one more thing left that needed to be done, but at the moment she couldn't face it. Better to just sit and stare then confess. It took a few moments for Maia to really notice that she was staring at her now perfectly functional computer. It had finished all it's updates and installs while she'd been out. Her hands on the keys, she checked that everything worked, which of course it did.

Maia wasn't sure how long she sat there, her eyes fixed on the lock screen image she'd chosen. It wasn't fair that this computer now reminded her of what she'd lost. In a way, she missed when her only problem was a malfunctioning computer.

A sharp noise of the door opening, and Izzy's voice calling out broke through her haze.

After pulling herself back, Maia called out letting Izzy know she was home. Still, Maia wasn't really listening to the voices, even if she could tell they were coming closer. Her roommates were almost standing beside her before Maia caught the details of their conversation.

"The class is literally called Social Work 301: Theory and Practice," Izzy was saying. "And I'm yet to see any practice."

"It's only October," Simon replied. "Maybe they'll do practical stuff later in the year."

"Even so, I have to say I'm not impressed with this class," Izzy continued.

"Communications is a much less specific major," Simon was saying as the two of them joined her in the dining room.

"Lucky," Izzy laughed. Then she added, "Hey Maia. How was your morning?"

"Fine," Maia smiled, keeping her emotions off her face as best she could.

"Got any classes left today?" Izzy asked. "I need a break from school so I was thinking of going out tonight. You're welcome to join us if you want to?"

"I actually have a lot of homework," Maia replied, though she'd finished her work yesterday. "I might just stay in tonight."

"You sure," Simon asked.

"Yeah," Maia replied, trying to smile like she meant it.

Maia worked to keep her mask on while her roommates were around, but even so, it seemed like she hadn't fooled Simon. Indeed, later that night she received texts from him asking if she was really okay. It was a testament to how well Simon knew her that he had texted rather than asked in person. Maia always found it easier to say such things over text rather than in person, and Simon knew this. Even so, Maia didn't admit anything to him that night.

'Are you sure you're fine?' Simon's texted for the third time. 'You seem off to me.'

'Just tired,' Maia texted back. 'Have fun with Izzy.'

The evening went on, and Maia distracted herself with YouTube videos and Netflix for as long as she could, but such things did little to pull her from her thoughts. In the end Maia ended up doing homework, though nothing that was due till next month. But it was all a distraction. Nothing had changed from this morning. She knew who she needed to tell - who she owed the truth to - but the idea made her stomach squirm. Though she couldn't regret the act itself, the aftermath was a different story. Maia hated how much pain this would cause. Still she didn't want to confess.

Simon was more than just concerned over the next few days, and he seemed to have let Izzy in on it, since now both her roommates were acting weird around her. Maia ignored them, repeating that she was fine at least once a day.

It took her nearly three days to finally hit the send button. She wasn't sure how this conversation would end, but she knew it had to be done. Now matter how little she wanted to do it, the lies had to stop somewhere. Maia was through with lies, but most of all, she was done lying to herself.

He replied a few hours later and agreed to meet up. Maia had dithered for ages trying to decide if a public place would be better, or if they should talk alone, but in the end, she chose public.

As she walked, Maia tried to figure out what she was going to say. No matter how she phrased it, she couldn't lighten the blow. Maia considered the kindness in not telling him, but her frustration with lies stopped her. There could never be any good that came from cold hard lies. Though there could be kindness in not voicing your every negative thought you have towards another person, there could never be kindness in denying someone a choice. She respected him, and he needed the information no matter what happened afterward.

"Hey, Bat," Maia said smiling up at him. She'd just entered the cafe and sure enough he was already there, standing beside a table near the window.

"Oh boy," Bat said, as he saw her face. "From your texts I knew something was up, but I'm really not going to like this am I?"

"Why don't we sit down," Maia said gently, dropping all pretense at casual.

"Yep, not going to like this," Bat sighed as he sat across from her.

"I'm sorry," Maia said trying to help, though she knew it was pointless. "I didn't realize I was being so obvious."

"Just tell it to me straight," Bat said firmly. "Are you breaking up with me?"

"No," Maia said in a small voice. "Though you might be done with me when I say what I need to say."

Bat looked - if possible - more concerned. She didn't want to, but Maia had to open her mouth and speak.

"I don't really know how to say this," Maia began. "I tried to think of a kind way to tell you on the way here, but no matter how I tried, they all sounded confusing, or stupid, or both." She paused and took a deep breath. "The truth is that there really isn't a kind way to say this."

"It wasn't planned, and you have to know that it was never my intention to cause you pain," Maia continued.

"I know you wouldn't hurt me on purpose," Bat said.

There was nothing else for it. No more ground to cover. There was nothing left but for Maia to say the words.

"I slept with my ex."

Rather than deal with his silence, Maia kept talking. "I am very sorry I hurt you, and I will understand if you don't want to see me anymore."

Then she couldn't think of anything else to say. The silence somehow made everything worse. Maia watched his face. She saw pain there for sure, but also anger. Yet, still he didn't speak. She wanted to look away, but her eyes were fixed on his face, desperate to know what wheels were turning behind those eyes.

After what felt like forever, Bat finally spoke. "I believe you are sorry."

Maia nodded a little as if to say 'thank you' though she didn't dare speak. Surely, he had more to say.

"Technically we aren't exclusive, not that I'm seeing anyone else but," he paused, taking a deep breath. "But we never promised not to."

Maia almost said something, but thought better of it and closed her mouth again.

"I won't deny that I want to punch your ex right now," Bat continued. "Punch him right in the face like multiple times, but if you can promise me that it didn't mean anything, and it won't happen again, then I think I can move past this." This time when he paused there was a softness to his eyes. "I really like you Maia."

Maia couldn't speak for a moment, her mind working frantically. This was not what she'd expect at all, and she had no answers for him. She'd planned on never talking to Jordan about this, but did that mean that their passionate moment together had meant nothing to her? Did that mean that if he showed up right now and asked to be with her that she wouldn't go?

"What I want to say and the truth are two different things," Maia finally spoke. "I wish more than anything that it meant nothing. I wish I ruled my own heart, rather than the other way around. Everything rational and sensible in me knows you are the better choice, but if he told me to jump, I'll ask how high. I hate myself, but I can't stop loving him. I'm sorry, Bat."

"I'm sorry too," Bat replied, gently touching her face. "Because I know exactly how that feels." He paused, leaning forward to kiss her sweetly before whispering. "Goodbye, Maia."

So... guess who couldn't not write while on vacation? If you guessed me you'd be right. Which means you guys get a chapter before my vacation even ends. Aren't you lucky I am such an addict that I spend days writing on my phone. ^_^

Also there was alot less outrage in the comments/reviews after the last chapter then I expected. It seems that I didn't really surprise anyone.

Sneak Peek of Chapter 133

And so Alec started his shift sitting in what was probably a staff room, filling out forms about himself. So far so good, though he wished Maia was here. It would be nice to see a familiar face. The silence was intimidating. Alec could hear the sound of the fridge whirring as if it were a loudspeaker. Eventually another staff member came to eat their lunch and Alec was spared from the silence. Though this staff member didn't talk to him at all, they created some background noise and drought out the fridge.

When Alec was pretty sure he'd completely all the paperwork, he got up and went to find Brentan who turned out to be easy to find.

"Good," Brentan said as he accepted the tedious paperwork that had been the last few hours of Alec's life. "And today you will be shadowing Jamie." Then he pointed in a direction behind Alec who turned.

Standing behind the deli counter was a rather tall man with dark black hair. He had a hat on with the grocery store logo on it.

"Just shadowing for today," Brentan said, pointing again. Trying to take a hint Alec turned and headed toward this Jamie person.

"Hi," Alec said awkwardly as he approached.

"New meat!" Jamie said with enthusiasm.