His little golden car swerved, barely avoiding falling to its doom. Jace punched the air, relieved he wouldn't have to see the words 'game over' across his screen one more time. There was no time for relief, however; he had a race to win. Jace tried to focus as the little car threatened to swerve off course again.
"You are gonna lose my friend," Jon stated. Jace didn't turn to see his face, but still the grin was evident in his voice.
"Not if you lose first!" Jace exclaimed right before driving his car into a ditch.
"You were saying," Jon replied coolly. Jace turned to glare at his opponent.
"Best out of ten?" he asked.
"Nah," Jon smirked. "I think it has properly been established that you suck at Mario Kart."
"It's these stupid controllers!" Jace whined. "I hit the A button, and nothing happens!"
"Don't blame the equipment for your failure," Jon replied. "It's tacky."
Thankfully, Jace was saved from more taunting from his friend by his mother calling them down for dinner. Christmas had come and gone, and Jace was starting to dread going back to school; not because of school, but because he would miss hanging out with Jon.
"Coming," Jace called back down the stairs.
"Hey Jace," Jon said, suddenly serious as they stood up.
"Yeah?" Jace replied, concerned by his friend's tone.
"Is your mom okay?"
"Why wouldn't she be?" Jace shrugged.
"Well she seems anxious, or at least jumping like she's expecting something to happen that isn't," Jon explained.
"I noticed that before," Jace observed. "I thought it was your visit that she was waiting for."
"Well, I'm here," Jon reminded him. "And I've been here since before Christmas. Tomorrow is New Years. It's not me."
"I must admit you have a point there," Jace replied. They were interrupted then by both their stomachs growling, and mutually decided without words that it would wait till after dinner. They headed down the stairs together, eager to eat, but even so, Jace's mind remained occupied. If Jon was noticing it too, then it wasn't all in his head, and he needed to find out what was making his mother so jumpy. It had concerned him a little before, but now with Jon's added observations he was really worried.
They all sat down to eat, and were talking about this and that; his mother in particular wanted to tell them about what she was serving. Jace usually loved to listen when food was involved, but at the moment he was otherwise occupied, analyzing his mother's body language.
"And there's an apple fritter for dessert," Celine was saying when Jace tuned in. "I even bought ice cream." She smiled, and for a moment it felt to Jace like nothing was wrong, but then he saw her hands shaking.
"What's going on?" Jace asked firmly. "What's wrong?"
"Noth-" Celline began, but Jace cut her off.
"And don't say nothing's wrong because I know better," Jace snapped. "I may not be the most observant guy in the universe, but I know somethings wrong. Tell me, now." He tried to say it as firmly as he could so she'd actually answer. With her avoiding questions all holiday he wasn't sure what else to do.
"There's no problem, if that's what you are worried about," Celine replied softly.
"I'm worried about you," Jace told her.
"No need," she smiled.
"Stop it!" Jace snapped.
"Maybe we should all just sit and eat," Jon suggested, clearly uncomfortable with being in the middle of a family argument. "I mean dessert is the best part of dinner, isn't it?"
"I couldn't agree more. Excellent idea Jon," Celine tried to change the topic, but Jace didn't sit.
"Why are your hands shaking?" Jace wanted to know. "Why have you been quick to startle all week? What are you hiding, mother?"
"I don't want to tell you," Celine said softly after a long moment's silence. "I promise there's nothing wrong, I just- I worry that telling you would turn it into something wrong. You're going back to school soon. Why can't we just have a nice time until then?"
"Because we can't," Jace replied coolly. "Because my girlfriend didn't even text me on Christmas, because my mother is keeping secrets from me, because there is enough shit in my life already without adding worrying about you to the list."
"You won't want to hear it," Celine warned him.
"Tell me," Jace ordered.
"Do you remember when Clary came to visit?" Celine began.
"That was two and a half years ago mom," Jace sighed. Celine nodded. Then there was silence while everyone waited for her to continue, something she was clearly not interested in doing.
"Well, I guess we told you what happened," Celine eventually spoke after a long drawn out pause.
"He went for Clary again, and you stopped him," Jace summarized. "And I haven't dared bring Clary back here ever since."
"I've barely seen you ever since," Celine echoed.
"What are you getting at mother?" Jace asked, unwilling to let her guilt him into feeling bad about not bringing Clary anywhere near Sebastian.
"Well, there is someone else I've seen a few times, more than a few times, since those days," Celine almost whispered. "Someone who looks a lot like you."
It took a moment for those words to sink in. Jace just stared at her, unblinking. She could only mean…
"You've been seeing Sebastian?" Jace asked. "That's dangerous. Why, why would you do that?"
"He'd never hurt me," Celine replied stubbornly.
"Given past events there is no way to know what he is capable of," Jace stated. "I want you to never see him again."
"I can't do that," Celine spoke softly, but firmly.
"Sebastian has no one else," Celine pleaded. "I all but raised him, Jace!"
"I don't care," Jace replied.
"He's changed," Celine continued as if Jace hadn't spoke. "He wants to be better."
"I don't believe it," Jace scoffed.
"You weren't there," Celine said, suddenly with energy. "You don't know what's been going on. He came to me crying, and broken. What was I supposed to do?"
"You were supposed to turn him out, and lock the door behind him," Jace called back.
"I think knowing I was ashamed of him… changed him somehow. Made him see the truth about himself," Celine continued. "You were raised like brothers, twins even, please just for me… try."
"No," Jace replied stubbornly. Then something clicked in his head. "Wait, does this mean you've been- been-" He didn't know how to describe whatever she was doing. "For over two years!"
Celine simply nodded.
And Jace ran out of patience. He turned and left the room without looking back. The energy from his anger carried him all the way outside, and down the block to a small park he'd visited often as a child. There, his anger collapsed, and he fell to his knees in the snow.
His tears felt cold on his face as the winter air tried to freeze them. Jace didn't know how he was feeling in this moment. He just knew he didn't have the emotional energy to process any of them. Two and a half years she'd been keeping this to herself. Two and a half years of sheltering, and helping someone Jace had decided to hate for the rest of his life. The very idea of his mother and Sebastian being in the same room together made him want to punch someone, preferably Sebastian. It felt like his life was falling apart, like everything he'd ever counted on was a lie.
Jace wasn't sure how long he sat there. His knees were very cold by now, his pants soaked through with melted snow. His mind was blank, his heart as numb as his knees; but Jace didn't want to move, didn't want to think. Wasn't it possible for him to just stay here forever. To stay blank and numb until the world made sense again?
"I found you."
It was a familiar voice, but still Jace didn't turn his head. His eyes were closed as he focused on his breathing and the cold seeping into his body.
"You're mom's worried about you."
Still, Jace didn't reply.
"She sent me to find you."
Giving in just that fraction more, Jace let his body fall into the snow. Laying on his side, Jace could see Jon standing near him.
"You are going to freeze to death," Jon commented. "Please come back and get warm."
Jace didn't have the energy to argue. He let Jon pull him up without speaking, and began walking back. They walked in silence the whole way. His mother was in hysterics hugging him, and fretting over how cold he felt. Jace agreed to take a hot shower, if only to get her to calm down. Warm and in dry clothes, Jace went back downstairs to face the music.
Both his mother and Jon were sitting at the table, not speaking. Jace couldn't tell if Celine had told Jon more than he undoubtedly guesed from what he overheard, or they'd just sat here in silence the entire time.
"So," Jace began unsure how to defuse. "What has she told you?" He directed his question to Jon.
"Not much," Jon replied cautiously. "It seems like this guy you've known all your life tried to hurt my sister, so you cut him out forever? And now your mom is trying to help him?"
"He did more than try and hurt her," Jace said with his teeth clenched. "He tried to rape her. If I hadn't gotten there when I did-" But he stopped talking, unwilling to entertain the thought.
Jon seemed to suddenly grasp the depth of the conversation. He made a small 'oh' sound then fell silent.
"He wants to get better," Celine said in a pleading tone. "He so misses your friendship."
"Yeah, well he didn't deserve it," Jace snapped. "And he doesn't deserve your help either."
"Is there no small part of you that remembers how it was?" Celine continued in a small voice. "You two growing up together, always side by side. Learning to walk together in this very room. Riding your bikes to school together. Trying to study together, but always giving up in favour of some outdoor sport. Then you two both started bringing home girls around the same time. He was always here Jace. I was the one who helped him with his homework, bought him medicine when he was sick. His parents didn't care. We are all he's got."
"He should have thought of that before," Jace snapped, even if a part of him wanted to hope that his mother was right.
Celine turned to Jon as if looking for an alley, but Jon held up his hands in surrender and said, "Hey, she's my sister."
"Right," Celine sighed. She turned to look back at Jace. All the anxiety and fear had left her now, replaced with resigned sadness and disappointment. "Now can you see why I didn't want to tell you?"
"So there's nothing I can say that will make you stop helping him then?" Jace asked.
With a slow movement his mother shook her head. "You'd understand if you saw him. A person can change a lot in over two years, as you very well know. Clary changed you more than you realize."
Jace wanted to say something quite rude in reply, but despite everything, it was his mother looking back at him, and he just couldn't do it.
"I'm going to bed," Jace stated, before turning and heading back up the stairs.
It was comfortable under the covers, and it was nice to be warm, but at the same time it felt wrong. The cold of the snow had been a better match for his mood. Jace laid there, eyes closed trying to keep his mind blank so he could sleep… but no such luck.
His mind had lost that blank escape feeling it had had in the snow, and now he was really thinking. Round and round his thoughts went as he tried to picture his mother and Sebastian hanging out these last two years. It made him want to throw up or punch something… or both.
He couldn't help but wonder what Jon thought of all this. In one way, he was just being thrown into someone else's family drama, but in another it had been an event regarding his sister that had started the whole thing. Would Jon hold anything against Jace about the hurt done to his sister? Or was Jon going to try and stay out of it since years had passed and Clary was fine? Maybe he'd ask Jon in the morning. Then again, there was always a chance that come sun rise he'd still be lying here wide awake staring at this ceiling.
What do you think guys? Should I change my username to 'UsedToWritealott'? Tehe
A Sebastian plot line while Clary was away has been planned for ages! In fact, some plans for this story were put into motion so long ago that they are no longer gonna fit in the story. If I'd managed to work them in like 80 chapters ago maybe, but now it would feel forced. So they have been scrapped. If you are curious feel free to PM me on fanfic and ask what they are. ;)
Also I did start another Malec fic, way more fun than Rock Bottom. It's light and should be a good time. Even though I have the first chapter done I'm not going to be updating it until another story is finished. The way I've been updating lately I really don't think I can updated three stories at once in any kind of timely manner. When I finish Rock Bottom I'll start uploading the new one because let's be real... R&S is like NEVER GONNA END! Sigh. I gotta figure out how I'm gonna end this mother f-cker. sigh. (Update: This light cute Malec story is complete now. It's called "Counterfeit Boyfriend.")
Sneak Peek Chapter 144
"Girls suck," Alec stated, planting himself in the chair beside his sister.
"Well then aren't you glad you don't like to date them," Simon chuckled. Alec gave him a look of such annoyance that Simon decided to change tactics.
"Alright I'll bite," he said. "Why do girls suck?"
All Simon managed to get out of Alec's mumbled reply was something along the lines of "wanting what they can't have."
"You are gonna have to explain a little better than that if you want my sympathy," Simon replied.
"I know what you're talking about," Izzy said, opening her eyes and lifted her head to face her brother. "You're talking about mom's work friend, Brenda."