Lightning Doesn't Strike Twice

"Spider-Man robs bodega. Spider-Man ruins park statue. Spider-Man: Menace at Large. Seriously, Peter, why do you keep selling Spidey pictures to the Daily Bugle if all they do is bash Spider-Man on every issue?"

On this mundane afternoon, Peter was gathering up another set of Spider-Man pictures to sell to J. Jonah Jameson at the Daily Bugle. As a sort of weird almost masochistic collection, Peter also kept a portfolio of Daily Bugle newspapers in which his pictures made the front page. Needless to say, the binder got thick really quickly. MJ decided to stop by to see if Peter had made any progress on her portfolio that they made in Central Park the other day. Peter quickly trying to hide his trashcan of used tissues told her that while he hadn't gotten far, at least he was looking at her pictures.

"Honestly, MJ, I hate it too, but I'm kinda stuck. When I first started out, the Bugle was the first paper to offer up a reward for Spidey pics. Jameson liked some of what I had, and when he realized that I was only one bringing in good consistent shots, he made me sign an exclusivity deal."

"Ohhhh so that means…"

"Yea. I can only sell my photos to the Bugle. So on one hand, I'm getting a steady flow of income."

"But you're also feeding your own hate machine?"

"Bingo. It is what it is really. Most folks seem to ignore all the Bugle nonsense anyway. I like to let my actions speak for me."

"Spider-Man ruins blueberry pie stand?"

"…Ok yea that was on me, but I was trying to stop Shocker! Sorta kinda my fault for crashing into that pie stand but also…not my fault?"

"Hehehe."

"You gotta have thick skin in this kind of town to deal with all this stuff. Anyway, this should be all I need to give to Jameson. Just gotta swing by and hand them in."

"Hand them in? In person? Can't you just email the pictures to him?"

"Ehhh he's a stickler for quality. He'd rather I give him the memory card and let his crew do all the photo developing.

"Mind if I come?"

"Uhh sure, but why?"

"I'm bored. Plus, I'm curious to see what the Bugle looks like."

"I guess it'd be ok. Let's get going."

Peter stuffed his backpack with his camera and memory cards and headed out his bedroom door. He was halfway down the steps before he realized MJ wasn't following him. Climbing back up, he found her awkwardly standing in the middle of his room rubbing her arm.

"MJ? You alright?"

"I was wondering…"

"Hmm?"

"Could we take the Webslinger Express?"

An amusing smile grow on Peter's face as he chuckled. MJ meanwhile simply twirled a strand of her hair waiting for Peter's answer.

"Haha sure. I didn't think you'd enjoy webswinging all that much."

"I like it. The rush is pretty fun. My hair gets all frizzy, but I'll wear a hair tie! Besides, we'll get to the Bugle much quicker and that'll give us time to do more stuff."

"What kinda stuff?"

Seizing her moment, she sauntered over to Peter and wrapped her arms around his neck. Her lips pursed into a cheeky smolder while her green eyes held a mischievous twinkle in them. Her face inched closer to his brushing past his cheek.

"Well, for starters, you could…..do me?" she purred into his ear.

Peter's eyes widened in shock. Getting the message, he smirked with equal mischief and picked her up like a bride-to-be.

"Bugle and back, faster than you can say webshooter!"

"Uhhh Tiger, aren't you forgetting something?"

"Huh?"

Rolling her eyes, Mary Jane tugged on the collar of his T-shirt.

"You think maybe you should change before swinging around for all of Queens to see?"

"Good idea…"

*THWIP THWIP*

"WOOOOHOOOO!"

"Hahaha having fun there Red?"

"You kidding? This is AMAZING!"

*THWIP THWIP*

Now properly changed into his suit, Peter was swinging full speed between the towering skyscrapers of New York. MJ tightly hugged him from behind, but Peter created a web safety belt just in case. To hide her identity from any prying eyes, Mary Jane decided to don one of Peter's hoodies and her domino mask from her Halloween costume. So now, Spider-Man and mysterious red-headed lady were free to enjoy the Webslinger Express. Despite, knowing much faster ways of getting to the Daily Bugle, Peter opted to take a bit of a scenic route passing by the Chrysler Building and Times Square. MJ was eating up all the sights and thrills of the swing letting the wind rush through her hair and the sun shine down on her. Eventually though, Peter did have to deliver these photos to Jameson…

"So this is the Daily Bugle…"

"Well top floor anyway."

"It kinda just looks like a regular old office building."

"I mean it is a regular old office building."

After sneaking in through the vents and quickly changing in the bathroom, Peter and MJ made their way to the editorial level of the Daily Bugle. As Peter said, the floor was just a regular office space full of cubicles and hard-working journalists finalizing their stories. Some folks were hastily typing away while others were trying to figure out the best layout for the page. MJ was able to take a peek at a few of the headlines as they passed by the cubicles: "Local Bodega Owner Becomes Viral Sensation", "Are Carrier Pigeons Still Being Used?", "What Lurks in the Sewers Below?", "The Yankees should trade DJ LaMahieu."

"Wait wait wait hold on," MJ stopped in her tracks, "The Yankees should trade DJ LaMahieu? Excuse me who do you think you are?!"

"Uhhh Max Ingoe? I've been covering the Yankees for the Bugle for over ten years now…"

"And? What makes you think the Yankees should trade one of their best players?"

"It's because he's a great player is why they should trade him to bring in a younger core or draft picks."

"A younger core that's gonna have to go through the Minors anyway? DJ is a three-time golden glove winner! He was third in the MVP voting a few years ago! He can play any infield position and still hits when it counts!"

"His batting average has been dropping since his supposed MVP year. Best to get rid of him while he's still sorta hot. Hey, wait a minute! Who are you? Why am I justifying my column to you!"

"Now now everyone why don't we all just cool off," a low softer voice interjected.

"Hey Robbie! Sorry Max, uh this is Mary Jane, my girlfriend," Peter also chimed in.

"Hello Peter. This your girlfriend? Wow, you really hit the jackpot with this one."

"Haha so she tells me. Anyway, I'm gonna give Jonah these pictures. Good to see you all!" Peter said as he grabbed MJ's hand and led her away, hopefully avoiding any more sports headlines.

"Y'know she's right, Max. The Yankees would be crazy to trade LaMahieu."

They had walked a little ways away before curiosity got the best of Peter.

"Since when are you into sports?" Peter asked as they slowly approached Jameson's office.

"Eh I dabble. I enjoy the competitiveness."

"You never mentioned it before."

"Well I dunno. I figured you were kinda nerdy and didn't really care for sports."

"I don't. Not that much anyway. But I like hearing about what you like as well. Part of the relationship after all."

"Awww you're so sweet," she smiled kissing his cheek.

"Besides, I'm a Mets fan."

"Gasp! You are not!" she nearly stopped in her tracks.

"Eh. I like the underdogs. Uncle Ben took me to a few games when I was a kid. We made a lot of great memories back then."

"Hmmm you'll have to share a few of them with me some day."

"Some day."

"Although I will admit, if this was like a first date first meeting type of deal, you being a Mets fan would've been a huge deal breaker."

"Well then, good thing we're already dating. Cause I'd never let you go."

"Same here, Tiger."

At the far end of the floor was a little desk set in front of a large window with the blinds closed. The door to the side read, "J. Jonah Jameson: Editor-in-Chief." Outside that door at the little desk sat a tall woman with a bob haircut.

"Hey Betty. Got some Spidey pics for Jameson."

"Oh good! That'll cheer him up. He's been in a crabby mood today."

"Lovely."

"And who's this?"

"Oh hi! I'm Mary Jane, Peter's girlfriend."

"Ahhh. A buffer. Smart, Peter."

Despite the odd comment, Mary Jane followed Peter into Jameson's office. Immediately she was met with intense shouting and yelling.

"Well you tell him that I could do a better job on my own with an iron and some perfume! How dare he charge two hundred and fifty bucks for shabby carpet cleaning like that!...I don't care that he came highly recommended! I will not be swindled like a maniac!...sigh I love you too, honey."

A tall man wearing a yellow vest and brown pants slammed the phone down hard. He had a flat top hairdo which was black up top but white down the sides. He twitched his little mustache still clearly upset at his latest phone call.

"Hey Mr. Jameson," Peter greeted the irritated editor.

"Parker! Where have you been?"

"Just putting the finishing touches on these Spidey pics."

"Yea? What crime did you catch him doing this time?"

"Uhhh he stopped a huge bank robbery over in 57th."

"You mean a bank robbery that HE orchestrated to begin with!"

"Again, you've got no proof of that, Mr. Jameson. We've been over this."

"And we've been over the fact that an untrained journalistic eye like yours may not be able to read between the lines like mine!" Jameson argued as he took the flash drive Peter handed to him, "Oh and who's this?"

"This is my girlfriend, Mary Jane."

"Hiya!"

"Hmmph. Welcome to the Bugle."

Peter and MJ stood by as Jameson opened his computer and began looking through Peter's pictures. Silence fell upon the group as Jameson appeared to be inspecting each and every pixel. Mary Jane was actually pretty stunned at the scene. She had wondered why Peter would continually stick with a paper that kept trashing his other persona and even sign an exclusivity contract with them. Maybe Jameson was a wise boss. Someone whose strict attention to detail provided ample skills for Peter to learn. After all, Jameson at least looked like he was being very thorough with Peter's submissions.

"Hmm. Crap. Crap. Mega Crap. Blurry. Trash…..this one's pretty good," Jameson finally commented, "Hmm two hundred for the lot."

"Two hundred? I had to climb up a flagpole to get some of these!"

"Yea? Well you shoulda climbed higher. 205."

"Mr. Jameson!"

"Keep yapping and I'll drop to 190."

"That's not fair!" Mary Jane interrupted.

"Excuse me?"

"Peter works hard to get you these shots! These are great high-quality pictures of Spider-Man that you honestly can't get anywhere else! And you know it too. That's why you made Peter sign that exclusivity contract. And now you're using it to lowball him! You're just a cheapskate and a bully!"

"Hmmm. Who is this again?"

"Uhh my girlfriend, Mary Jane."

"Hmmm. 220," Jonah pondered as he rubbed his chin.

"400!" MJ haggled back.

"250."

"380."

"….270."

"350."

"…289."

"…..325," MJ fired back glaring into Jonah's eyes.

"Fine! 300 that's my final offer and the standard rate for freelance photographers anyway."

"315. If 300 is the standard rate, Peter should get a little extra for producing high quality exclusive work."

"Ok ok! 315!"

Though very annoyed, Jonah shook Mary Jane's hand and wrote Peter a check for three hundred and fifteen dollars. Satisfied but a little flabbergasted, Peter took the check and walked out with Mary Jane in tow. Jonah sat down rubbing his temple a bit before looking back at his computer. Oddly the screen blurred and looked fuzzy for a second. Sparks began flying out of the keyboard just as he was about to type something.

Outside the office, Mary Jane was still fuming over what just happened.

"The nerve of him! I thought he was some wise journalist or something with how careful he was looking at your pictures. But then I remembered he's the asshole painting Spider-Man as a menace!"

"Easy with the accusations MJ! We're still in his building!"

"I don't care! He clearly doesn't appreciate your hard work! I know how difficult it is for you to get those shots! Ugh he drives me crazy. Such a cheapskate. Probably no decent moral bone in his body!"

Just as Peter was about to retort, the hairs on his neck stood straight up. He froze in place with his eyes widening. Mary Jane picked up on the signal immediately and started looking around for whatever the danger was supposed to be. Suddenly the lights started flickering and every computer on the floor started sparking. Everyone got up and stepped away from their desks to avoid being shocked before the lights blacked out. Slight panic spread out as Peter's spider-sense caused him to whip his head around. Quickly in the shadow of the blackout, he fired a webline towards Betty and yanked her hard away from Jonah's office.

*BOOM*

Moments later, a bright yellowish light burst through Jonah's office and found its way onto the main floor. The sparks and lightning bolts relit the lights giving everyone a clear look at what was happening. Max Dillion was floating mid-air and holding Jonah by the throat. Max, who recently branded himself as Electro, had on a brand-new green suit with yellow sparking lines running down the sides. His face and body were still pure energy, but clearly, he had gotten better at maintaining a solid human form.

"I'm just asking a simple question Jameson. Where is Peter Parker?"

"Who?" Jameson squirmed.

"The photographer who takes pictures of Spider-Man!"

"I dunno. I never met the guy. I get his stuff through email!"

"LIES! YOU MUST KNOW WHO HE IS!"

"I've never seen him before I swear! I wouldn't be able to pick him out from a police lineup! He could punch me in the face, and I'd never know it was him!"

"Rahhhh!"

Enraged, Electro flung Jonah across the room. Luckily, Robbie was there to blunt the fall, but they both ended up crashing into a desk. Meanwhile, Electro floated about the floor sending little lightning bolts everywhere and mildly shocking some of the surrounding people.

"I won't ask again! Where is Peter Parker!" he shouted.

No one answered as they all stood by terrified.

"Come on! He's been taking pictures of Spider-Man for this shitty paper for years and not a single person has seen him before!?" Max clenched his fists before spotting a familiar shade of red hair, "Hey wait a minute…"

In the blink of an eye, Electro zapped down towards the ground and grabbed Mary Jane's wrist before she could dodge out of the way.

"I know you! You're the girl Spider-Man was with. At the Halloween festival!"

"Huh? What? Me? I don't know what you're talking about. You're confusing me with someone else!" MJ tried squirming out of his hold.

"Oh no. I never forget a face. You lured me into the open so Spider-Man could dunk that water tank on me!"

"Get your hands off her you creep!" Jonah yelled, "There are practically thousands of redheads in New York!"

"Oh yea? How many of them wore a Halloween Spider-Man costume?"

"Why ask for a cheap knockoff costume when you can get the real deal?" a new voice chimed in.

*THWIP THWIP*

Swinging in, Spider-Man kicked Electro in the side forcing him let go of Mary Jane. As he landed gracefully on the ground, Spidey looked over to the scared Bugle employees trying to reassure them.

"It's ok folks. I got it all under control! I suggest you get somewhere safe and fast!" he announced.

As if on cue, majority of the reports bolted for the exits. Spidey and MJ locked eyes for a second before sharing nods.

"Be careful, Tiger," MJ whispered as Spidey jumped up towards Electro.

Behind her, MJ could hear Robbie and Jonah getting up and groaning, no doubt still recovering from that slam. Slowly, Jameson shook his head and got his bearings again as he heard the iconic and familiar thwip from Spidey's webshooter.

"SPIDER-MAN! I KNEW HE WAS IN CAHOOTS WITH THESE VILLAINS!"

"Now is not the time Jonah!" Robbie scolded his boss.

"He's right, Mr. Jameson. We really should get out of here."

*ZAP*

The three civilians ducked as a stray lightning bolt zoomed through the walls causing debris to fall and block the last remaining exit.

"Shit…"

"Aha! See that! Spider-Man forced Electro to block our exit trapping us in here! No doubt to keep us as hostages!"

"What is with you, man!" MJ refrained from gouging Jonah's eyes out.

Meanwhile, Spidey was trying to get close and land hits on Electro, but a strong electrical field was keeping the hero at a great distance. This proved to be Electro's advantage as the sparky villain just had to sit back and keep firing bolts at the agile webhead. Though his spidey-sense and quick reflexes were helping him tremendously, Spidey couldn't help but feel like Electro's aim was getting better and better.

*BOOM CRASH BANG*

At this point it was like a dance. A flip here and a somersault there and Spidey was dodging these bolts left and right. Even in midair, he had to lean back and spin like Neo in the Matrix to avoid a double blast. Quickly he tried firing webs at the villain, but Max simply intensified his electric field and burned through the webs.

"Ok. Learned some new tricks I see."

"Oh I've learned plenty, Spider-Man. All with the purpose of kicking your sorry ass."

"Look, Max, I don't know what your problem is with me, but all I wanted to do was to help you."

"Help me?! You locked me up in prison!"

"That was out of my hands! You were hurting people! You need to calm down, Max."

"First, it's Electro now! And second, maybe I don't want to be helped anymore. Maybe with all this power I can actually be someone! Maybe people will respect me now!"

Further enraged, Electro fired a large lightning bolt right at Spider-Man. This time, the poor webhead was unable to dodge this latest attack. However, instead of being flung back by the blast, Spider-Man was being held in midair. The lightning had formed a sort of hand and tightly grasped the webslinger. Smirking, Electro used his now extended arm and slammed the Spider all over the floor and against the walls.

"Ahh! Arggh! Ahhhh!" Spidey groaned as he was thrown around like a ragdoll, "Ok, this is a pretty neat trick…"

As Electro slammed him against another wall, Spidey noticed a nearby fire alarm. Quickly, he fired a web at it and pulled hard. Sadly, nothing happened as Electro flung Spidey across the room yet again. Ever the keen observer, Mary Jane watched the events unfold and immediately looked up.

"Robbie right?"

"Robbie Robertson, yes ma'am."

"Spider-Man just pulled the fire alarm. I think he's trying to activate those sprinklers," she pointed upwards.

"Oh that's genius! He's trying to short-circuit Electro!"

*CLICK CLICK*

"But why didn't they go off? Actually, why aren't there alarms blaring?"

*CLICK CLICK*

"Electro must have fried the fire alarm system when he busted in here. But the sprinklers operate on a separate grid. And they'll react to fire or smoke without the need for a fire alarm."

*CLICK CLICK*

"Perfect! We just need to get up there and trigger the sprinklers then. But how?"

*CLICK CLICK*

"What is that goddamn clicking sound?!" MJ asked clearly irritated.

Robbie and MJ looked over to see Jonah sitting in a corner. With a cigar in his mouth, he looked back at the other two while desperately trying to start his lighter.

"What? I smoke when I'm nervous…"

Back with Spidey, he was finally able to free himself from Electro's electric claw. Unfortunately, it seemed like Electro was drawing power from the building, so his blasts became bigger and much harder to avoid. Taking another hard lightning bolt to the chest, Spidey slammed against the wall hard. Not wanting to take another hit, he immediately launched himself trying to webswing towards Electro.

"SPIDER!"

Midair, Spidey looked down to see MJ throw a tiny object towards him. Without questioning what she threw at him, he immediately caught it and landed on the ceiling. Opening his hand, he widened his eyes, realizing she had thrown him Jonah's lighter.

"MJ, you're one in a million," Spidey commented as he dodged another electric blast.

With new confidence and a new plan, Spidey fired a few webs at Electro, but they continued to disintegrate in the electric field. Understanding what Spidey was doing, MJ picked up a large piece of wood and threw it at the sparky villain. Being non-conductive, the wooden debris easily passed through the field and smacked Electro in the face.

"What the?!" Max looked around angrily.

Robbie picked up on the scheme and began throwing rocks at the energy being as well. Even Jonah joined in on the barrage of random stuff. Wood plank after concrete rocks after pencils and pens were hurled towards and increasingly annoyed Electro.

"ENOUGH!" he yelled causing his electric field to slightly burst, "Sticks and stones will not break my bones!"

"Yea, but I'm pretty sure water's gonna mess you up," MJ smirked.

"Huh?" Electro wondered as he looked up, "Ah shit…"

Up on the ceiling, Spider-Man waved a lighter flame underneath the sprinklers. It was tiny, but the little fire was enough to activate the sprinklers causing a huge downpour all across the Bugle floor.

"ARRHHHGGG" Max cried out as his body began sparking and reacting to the gallons of water being sprayed onto him.

Soon, he collapsed onto the ground. His bioelectric field fizzled out as he fell unconscious. Quickly, Spidey fired a flurry of webs wrapping Max into a neat little present for the police to deal with.

"That was quick thinking uh…Miss. I appreciate the assist," Spidey came over to chat.

"Anytime, Spider. Glad to help you nab this bad guy…again," she winked.

"Stay safe!"

With that last note, Spidey dove out the window and swung away leaving MJ with the two Bugle employees.

"Hey!" Jonah realized, "HE STOLE MY LIGHTER!"

"You sure you're ok MJ?"

"Peter I'm fine. Honestly, I'm more worried about you. Max threw you around and got in some pretty good licks."

"Nah I've been hit harder. Plus, I heal quickly…I think."

After that whole Electro fiasco at the Bugle, Peter and MJ met up outside and decided to take things slow. No Webslinger Express this time. Just a nice quiet stroll. They even got hotdogs from a nearby vendor.

"Y'know. I may have judged Jameson a little too harshly," MJ pondered.

"Hmm?"

"I mean he's still a cheapskate and a bully…But that was really brave of him to denying knowing you. Honestly, a lesser man would have cracked instantly at Electro's threat. But Jonah stuck to his guns the entire time. He even stood up for me!"

"Yea. Old Pickle-Puss has a hard exterior, but sometimes I like to think he's a softy at heart."

"Is this why you signed an exclusivity contract with him?"

"Well…I was young and kinda naïve. But I think the Bugle has good people. Robbie, Betty. Even Max Ingoe. They all do solid reporting. And honestly, I think Jonah does all the Spider-Man stuff because it sells papers. Robbie told me my first picture I sold them helped sell out four whole printings."

"Well, it is still kinda weird how you're feeding your own hate machine. But I guess you can justify it with the money they pay you. Speaking of! You really need to haggle your salary better!"

"Haha I had it under control! You on the other hand shouldn't be fighting sports reporters over their takes!"

"Well excuse me when a guy ten years on the job should know better!"

"Actually, why are you a Yankees fan? Aren't you originally from Pittsburgh?"

"Yea well at this point I'm much more of a New York kinda gal…plus the Pirates SUCK!"

"Ok that's fair. Still didn't expect you to get so up in arms about…DJ what's his face."

"LaMahieu! He's one of the best players to come out of LSU!"

"LSU?"

"Louisiana State University!"

"You follow college sports too!?"

"Ehh mostly LSU."

"Why…?"

"What can I say? I love my tigers."

AN: Heya everyone! As you can see I've hit the Spider-Man portion of my three-fic rotation haha. Although I love all the fluff and romance, adding some action and a reminder that this is indeed a Spider-Man fic is fun too. Also apologies for the LSU reference haha. I'm on a bit of a high since they just won the baseball National Championship. And if you've read How to Be Chalant , I made Dick a huge LSU fan. I normally try to avoid self-inserts, but I was also recently reminded that Mary Jane sorta kinda follows sports. Not religiously, but sorta kinda. Anywho, I made her a slight LSU fan because...it's my fic and I can do what I want (I promise I won't be taking that kind of liberty often haha). I hope you all enjoyed the read! Next chapter will come as soon as possible. Probably after either HTBC or my third fic, The Pink Princess and her Prince . Till then have a great day!