JMJ

Chapter Eight

Strength of Character

Usually so accustomed to carrying his tall height erect with neither pride nor self-consciousness, the Professor crumpled so low in his seat that he might have been trying to twist himself into a pretzel. Still he was not small enough. How he would have liked for just that moment to have been as short as the Mayor and hide under the table, but he did not give into such ridiculousness. This was for the girls!

Despite having participated in the gasp himself, the Judge immediately began banging his gavel as whispers circled round like the fluttering of anxious birds. The room settled soon enough and the Cross-examiner, as red a ripe tomato turned to the Professor and said, "How?"

"Well, it's all clearly documented. It was between Pr. Xylon Ex and myself."

"Pr. Xylon Ex?" asked the Judge adjusting his glasses and squinting horribly like trying to focus impossible binoculars. "The Pr. Xylon Ex? The leading professor of biology at the Sharpcity University who comes to Townsville Community College for special lectures twice a year and lives across from Gulfview Drive in Townsville for his love of the smaller more local type city atmosphere rather than a complete metropolis where he works? He's on the cover of Brainy Monthly at least once a year and is given the most grants from the federal government for his research than any other scientist this side of Kansas."

"Yes, that Pr. Ex," said the Professor as assertively as he could at the moment.

"I suppose you're going to say next that Chemical X is named after Pr. Ex," huffed the Mayor throwing his arms in the air exasperated.

"Actually…" said a voice so confident and alluring that he needed not raise his voice above a common conversational tone for everyone to turn to the lean silhouette standing in the sudden open doorway.

It was open because one of the doors was fried through with laser vision anyway, and this silhouette easily stepped over the taped-off entrance.

"I can say that this is true for myself if I am allowed to speak," said the silhouette.

"No, you may not!" said the Mayor. "This is no time for total strangers to talk about legal matters and people that are of no concern to you!"

The Judge pounded the gavel.

"But—!" the Mayor whined.

"Mr. Mayor," said Ms. Bellum.

"What is it, Ms. Bellum?"

"That man is Pr. Xylon Ex."

"He is? Oh, well, let him in then."

"I was trying to," sighed the Judge.

It did not matter. Pr. Ex was already in the room.

"Your honor," said Ex.

"Pr. Ex," said the Judge.

"And my colleague Pr. Utonium."

"Oh, uh, hello, Pr. Ex," muttered Utonium.

"In trouble again, I see."

Utonium did not answer.

"You should have given up childish games by now, especially with Chemical X."

"What do you have to do with Chemical X?" demanded the Cross-Examiner. "This is highly irregular, you know."

"This whole procedure is highly irregular setting up an 'almost trial' instead of a real questioning; though so is the topic on hand, is it not?" asked Ex.

The Cross-examiner glowered, but said nothing. It was hard to disagree with such an imposing figure despite the fact that he was not exceedingly tall. He may have been awkwardly lean, but he was not exactly a weakling. So lofty did he looked that he seemed beyond feeling the need to look demeaning upon those less learned or less sophisticated than himself. Maybe he had the right to feel this way in light of the way Townsville was handling this procedure, maybe he had not, but whether or not he had any experience with children, he also had a way of making himself appear more fantastic than Santa Clause and yet fright might be forgiven in place of thrill to sit upon his knee if he said 'yes' to a request.

Utonium had to admit that although there had been a time when he had felt himself completely at ease with Ex when they were first fresh from the student side of learning and became peers of teaching on the spectrum of higher learning, he now felt somewhat more like a freshman before him. Not because Utonium doubted his own intellect, but he could not help but feel as though Ex had surpassed him in some fashion that he could not fathom. Ex did not have the same amount of time he used to have since taking the job at Sharpcity University, but there was a small part of Pr. Utonium still which bemoaned the fact he had never quite achieved what Ex had.

Why? Utonium could not understand himself. Truly all he felt was relief more than anything. Despite the coolness in which Ex spoke, he knew he had come to his rescue. For that he felt like a younger brother to a somewhat arrogant older brother who at least loved him enough to chase the bullies away.

"Yes," said Ex. "We were in a joint project together when we discovered it. How we discovered it in itself will be long and complicated to explain, though I will, if you gentlemen have the patience. I—"

"We don't care how you found it!" interrupted the Mayor. "Just what is it already? For crying out loud!"

This time the Judge with full approval nodded instead of gaveling.

"It is the last known chemical in the universe as much as Planet X is the last planet in the galaxy. It is as of yet, a mystery as to what it is as much as the theory of multi-universes orbiting the outer realms beyond our comprehensions in this phase of our human existence. It has never been fully experimented with. Even in the little we did experiment with it, we deemed it too dangerous to use until science has advanced enough to contain its unknown properties."

"Why is that, Pr. Ex?" asked the Cross-Examiner.

#

"It's eating the desk, Xylon!" shrieked a somewhat younger Utonium. He looked very little different, but the man he was with was nearly a different species than who he was at present.

A full head of brilliant bronze hair and lion-like mane of a beard did have something to do with it, but the voice alone bespoke a gentler, humbler being as he said with honest fear for his friend, "Look out! It's the staplers too!"

He yanked Utonium back, and Utonium gulped at the staples that splat on the portrait of the grouchy, glaring dean rather than his own face. He felt at his untouched flesh despite himself, but the threat was not over yet.

The plants were everywhere, alive and biting. So little Chemical X had been used, but perhaps they should have used it on pansies rather than tiger lilies. They were ravenous from lack of plant food too. Pr. Chloroplast of plant biology would be too furious about the mutagenic replacements of her work to know about students neglecting to care for the lilies.

Crash!

Right through the window.

"Quick!" cried Ex.

"Here, I got the fire extinguisher!"

"The Bunsen burners may be better!"

#

"Oh! Stop! Stop! It's too horrible!" cried the Mayor.

"Well, I'm sure everything turned our alright," said Judge.

"Of course, it did!" said Utonium with a smile. "We had a lot of difficulty explaining to Pr. Chloroplast what happened to her plants when Chemical X had made them livid enough to try to find plant food on their own before we could extinguish them."

"And it had been such a small amount of the chemical," remarked Ex.

"No, I mean it's so engaging it's making me forget about the problems right here and now!" complained the Mayor.

Ms. Bellum sighed.

"Oh, just continue," said the Cross-Examiner with a shake of his head.

"With the help of Pr. Chloroplast we stopped every single one," said Utonium with shrug.

"But we did not tell Pr. Chloroplast what happened in full," said Ex.

"We told no one," admitted Utonium.

"Perhaps we should have," said Ex.

The Professor smiled.

There was the man he used to know beneath the popularity that had made him pompous over these past short years. He was still a scientist. Not every person Utonium made friends with in his youth were bad apples. He was proud to be a scientist again— working with a fellow natural philosopher.

"Yes," said Utonium. "But it was all thanks to you that we stopped the whole mess, really."

"No, no, it was you, Utonium," said Ex. "I can one hundred percent vouch for you character, and I would do it even before a Genghis Khan if it came to it. There is no one more innocent and well-meaning than Utonium, even if eccentric. If you allow this man to go, he will make up for his mistakes, I assure you, your honor. He may get himself into messes, but he's also very good at getting himself out of them. I only owe him, really, for it was he who reminded me once of the childlike and pure curiosity that a scientist must have. Neither personal gain, nor self-indulgence should ever be the forefront of any scientific endeavor, but the true desire to make the world a better place should be one's only goal. So I have a suggestion to make in this unorthodox procedure that is very scientific in nature."

"What's that?" asked the Judge.

"That the Professor should remain the guardian of these obviously very sentient creatures, and they should remain in his laboratory until we can deem them scientifically safe, of course."

Utonium frowned. "Well…"

"And that Chemical X should be banned for unauthorized persons," Ex added.

"I… guess, that one makes sense," agreed Utonium.

"And that there should be a study in the making of an anti-X chemical to undo its affects."

"Well, yes, but…" began the Professor.

"Sounds good to me!" said the Judge pounding his gavel.

"What about punishing the perpetrator!?" demanded the Mayor.

"Maybe the girls could do a little bit of… community service to make up for it instead?" offered the Professor. "They're only little girls. I can't lock them up in my lab. I—"

"Hmm, I see what you mean," said Ex, "Well, I'm willing to discuss this further, but—"

"Nope! Case closed!" said the Mayor. "This isn't even a real trial, after all."

Before Utonium said another word, he was tossed simply right out into the street.

"Why is it named after you, Pr. Ex," asked the Cross-Examiner.

"We flipped for it."

"That's not very scientific, now is it, letting things fall by chance?" remarked the Judge with a shrug.

"Throw him out too!" cried the Mayor who was in a temper all over again.

"But Mr. Mayor!" said Ms. Bellum.

Even the Cross-examiner's eyes popped with surprise, but the guards were far too quick to grab the very surprised Ex as he was thrown quite promptly out of the building as well.

"Such is the life of a true scientist, after all!" Ex remarked pulling himself upright and calmly brushing himself off. "Isn't that right, Utonium?"

But as he looked up he jumped in surprise to see that the other professor was being carried away through the angry mob. Ex, on the other hand was left to contemplate chaos theory in silence for a moment. He considered his eccentric peer as a near personification of the theory in himself. After all, who could have expected so much to happen just by accidently running into a volatile chemical into what otherwise would have been a simple mistake of a man depressed enough to try to make hope from throwing ordinary things into a bowl?

"What philosophical interest," concluded Ex who had long ago forwent the idea of anything coming from creating life rather than making better the life that already exists.

He tapped his mind and decided he would ponder this further and perhaps get some grants for other experiments already building in his ever-moving brain.

#

"Professor?" said Blossom as gently as she could; she didn't want to hurt his feelings. "What does that have to do with what we're doing right now?"

"And how do you know what happened after you weren't there anymore?" asked Buttercup scratching her head.

"It's just poetic license?" asked Bubbles.

"But poetic license won't help us win an honest trial," said Blossom.

"I wish we could just forget the trial and kick her butt and throw her in jail like she deserves," sighed Buttercup.

"What I mean is," said the Professor, and he paused. "That as long as you believe in justice, justice will prevail. Princess' criminal record is there for everyone to see. We just have to keep our heads and remain calm. So… no kicking butts, Buttercup. At least not Princess'."

"Well, she's still faking it!" said Buttercup.

Blossom frowned. Her mind was quite on a roll from the sudden spark her sister ignited. Then she smiled.

"That's it!" said Blossom. "If we can prove that her injuries are not so bad, then it will prove with or without her criminal record that she is being dishonest."

"How are we gunna do that?" demanded Buttercup. "It's not like we can just make her get up and walk around the court room."

"We can if we think of a way she couldn't resist!"

"Now that's thinking!" said the Professor.

"Like some candy or some money?" asked Bubbles half-heartedly.

"No, she'd just have someone else get it for her," said Blossom.

"Then what?" Bubbles pressed.

Blossom tapped her chin. "If only we had more time to plan."

But they didn't.

The trial began right then. The lawyers of Princess were excellent and as tough as pit-bulls.

"Don't worry," the Professor said quietly once the Utoniums' were all in their seats. "We do have people here on our side who know your character and worth in this city."

The Mayor: "They've saved this city every single day, including the pickle stand— at least three times. That's at least five hundred times the pickles over from the pickles destroyed by accident originally."

"Huh, he does math when it has to do with pickles," shrugged Bubbles.

Miss Keen: "They only ever showed the best insights into when a crime was being committed in my classroom, and they didn't abuse it for simpler things like students ganging up on each other or sneaking in gum. They use it only for crimes where their powers are needed, and Princess was disruptive more than a simple student and teacher talk could settle in the past. I have full confidence that if they believe Princess to be up to criminal activity, she probably is."

Blossom beamed the broadest for this. Looking at her sisters she was pleased to see that they felt hope too.

The Dog: "They give me treats and have saved my life more than once. I think they are good, good girls."

Blossom felt this one to be the weakest support, but as she looked at her sisters they appeared to be hopeful still. She wanted to be hopeful too, but so far Princess had chosen her time and place well enough to hide her antagonism and the truth behind the girls' fight.

Princess was confident. She would glare but would always look hurt, sniffle, and have the right answers in her lawyers. Plus a security tape that had been cut up and time-coded so that it looked like the girls were the ones who started the fight.

"But there's a blip!" Blossom pointed out. "You can see a huge one right—"

The gavel pounded. Blossom had spoken out of turn, and she bristled as she saw Princess turn her chuckle into a weak and overacted cough.

But in the end it was… a draw.

"Recess until tomorrow."

"No, no, no!" sobbed Princess, but she never left her seat. She barely even moved other than her mouth. This was Princess' master plan, but Blossom suddenly had a plan with cameras herself.