Once out of the car, the boys quickly got wet in the rain again, and once they were completely transformed Curtis led them up to the middle-sized building. As they climbed the steps, Luca looked to his left and saw a tiny car pull up in front of the smaller building. A creature the size of a rat climbed out, carrying paper bags that seemed to contain things like a single strawberry and one large snail. This being hopped up the steps, and then went to an even tinier door set within the already small main one, and balanced a grocery bag on one knee as it got out its keys.
Back at the middle-sized building, Curtis pressed a button next to the door. Something made a buzzing sound, and a speaker crackled. "Who is it?" asked a voice, distant and tinny but recognizable as Louise.
"It's me," Curtis replied. "I brought you some of Maureen's birthday cake." He glanced at the boys on either side of him, then apparently decided not to mention them yet.
"Oh! I totally forgot Maureen's birthday," Louise sighed.
On the right, the door of the biggest building opened, and a towering dinosaur-like creature with eyes that glowed like red coals looked out. It held up a hand, then called to someone inside, "it's still raining!"
"Then don't stand with the door open!" another voice boomed.
The giant monster shook its head and rolled its eyes, and went back indoors.
"It's okay, Louise," Curtis said into the speaker. "You've had a lot on your mind. Can I come up?"
"Of course," she said. The door went click, and Curtis opened it.
"Come on, kids," he said to the boys.
Louise lived on the second floor. When they reached the top of the stairs, she was already standing in her door waiting for them, with a creature under one arm that resembled a cross between a cat and an iguana. She smiled at Curtis, but then stiffened when she saw Luca and Alberto.
"These young men have a story to tell you," Curtis said.
"They already apologized this morning," Louise replied. "I told them it wasn't their fault."
"From what they said to me, I don't think you heard the whole thing," Curtis told her.
Louise heaved another sigh. "Come on in," she said, more resigned than welcoming.
Her apartment was no bigger than the Marcovaldo home above the Pescheria, but less cluttered. It was clear she lived alone except for the iguana-cat. There was a colourful crochet afghan thrown over the back of the sofa, a little threadbare as if it were second-hand, and a variety of photographs on the wall, apparently of members of her family since most of them were also orange and yellow monsters with short horns. A shelf of cookbooks seemed to represent cuisines from around the world, but the titles included strange selections like Best of Terrorkish Cooking and The New Grrrman Kitchen as well as more normal things like Anyone Can Cook.
With the door closed, Louise put her pet down, and it went up to sniff Alberto's ankles. He offered it a hand, and it tried his fingers next before bumping its head against his hand, asking for pats. It had no external ears, so Alberto scratched it under the chin instead.
"Here's your cake." Curtis offered the box. "It's too bad you couldn't join them for lunch."
"I doubt they'd have let me back in even to the cafeteria," said Louise. She took the box, then smiled awkwardly at the boys. "Can I offer you something to eat?" she asked. She didn't sound enthusiastic. The question was merely polite.
Luca swallowed. "No, thank you, Madame," he said.
"We each had three slices," Alberto explained.
"They were hiding in the trash processing break room all day," Curtis said.
"I see." Unwilling to eat it in front of guests, Louise set the box of cake on the table and gestured to the sofa. "Sit down."
Luca and Alberto sat. Louise pulled up a long ottoman which had been made to accommodate her three legs, and Curtis took the armchair by the wall. The cat-iguana hopped up into Alberto's lap and settled down.
"Okay," said Louise. "What else do I need to hear?"
Having already told the tale to Curtis, the boys were quite a bit faster and more organized in the version they gave Louise. A few minutes into it, they both began to dry out, but they'd already told her about the Change, so they simply let it happen. Curtis noticed it first, and watched Louise carefully for her reaction. As the boys' faces transformed, she took a sharp breath in through her teeth and began to stand up.
"No, no, it's okay!" Luca held up his hands.
"We warned you," said Alberto.
"Yes, you did." Louise glanced down at her hands. These, Luca noticed, were no longer bandaged, but the fur had been shaved from the backs of them and the palms, already hairless, were covered with scrapes and small cuts. Whatever they'd done to 'decontaminate' where she'd touched the terrifying humans, it looked like it had been painful. Louise looked around the room, then went to the window and pulled the curtains, already half-closed, all the way shut. "Sorry," she said as she returned to her seat. "Go on."
The boys continued their story, bringing it up to when they'd spoken to Curtis while hiding in the cupboard. Although Louise had said they'd already apologized, Luca couldn't stop himself from doing it again, now that they had the context to explain exactly what had gone wrong.
"We didn't know there really was a monster in Rocco's closet," he said. "If we had, we would have… I don't know, wrote you a letter or something instead of trying to scare you back."
"Yeah,' said Alberto. "We, uh…" he turned to Luca. "You think that's how humans feel about us? Not the ones in Portorosso, obviously, but…"
"No, you're right!" Luca realized. The humans had thought sea monsters probably didn't exist, but if they were, they'd be scary and dangerous and… well, not people. That was exactly how, in those terrifying seconds as the door opened, Luca had felt about Rocco's closet monster. "So yeah," he said to Louise, "we didn't know. We're very sorry, and we'll never do it again."
Louise sat quietly a moment, and then asked, "why are you apologizing to me?"
"Well, because you lost your job," said Luca. "You wouldn't have if we hadn't been there."
"Yeah, but that's just my job!" She stood up and started pacing up and down the little living room. "You two… you've lost your whole world! Your parents must be frantic. If I had a kid who went to a sleepover and just vanished, I don't even know what I'd do. And now Mr. Waternoose is… you two have to go home!" She sat down again and held on to her horns, the way a human might push their hands through their hair. "You're sorry? I'm sorry. I didn't know what to think when I found you there. I'd seen the tour group earlier and I assumed… I should have asked more questions. What are we going to do with you?"
Luca hadn't expected that. It hadn't occurred to Luca that Louise might feel bad about what she'd done to them. It had been an accident!
It must have occurred to Alberto, though, because he gently elbowed Luca in the ribs and said, "I told you it was her fault."
"Don't say that!" Luca protested.
"No, he's right," said Louise.
"It wasn't anybody's fault. Nobody knew what was going on," Luca pointed out. "Anyway, it's also not fair that Mr. Waternoose is hoarding all the screams. If he wasn't doing that, we wouldn't be in danger now."
"Never mind that right now," said Louise firmly. "We have to get you home. We'll have to get that door out of… the door was sent to review, wasn't it?"
"Yeah," Curtis said. "I couldn't take them there after hours with everything locked up. I told Maureen I left something in the kitchen but there wasn't any excuse I could have made to the review workers."
"Taking them there when the place is up and running isn't going to be easy, either," Louise said.
Curtis thought about that. "Security around review can be pretty tight… but the door's not the only thing we're going to need."
"We need a scare station," Louise agreed.
Luca looked at Alberto, who shrugged – he had no idea what they were talking about, and nothing to contribute, any more than Luca did. They were just going to have to trust these people.
"The easiest thing to do would be just slip the door into the scare queue and then smuggle them through while everybody's busy," Louise said. She stood up to pace again. "Except of course that I've been fired! We'll need another scarer, but who would risk their job for this? Scarberry is a stickler for rules, he'd turn us in at once. Zamora is probably thrilled I'm not there to make him look bad anymore, as if it's my fault his kids prefer to yelp than scream. He won't help. I don't know about Yamanaka but I'd bet…"
"What about the new guy?" Alberto asked, desperate to offer something. "Sullivan?"
Neither of the boys had actually seen the monster who'd apparently replaced Louise. When they'd heard his voice in the little kitchen he'd sounded nice, but then, a lot of monsters probably sounded nice when they weren't terrified of a human. Much like a lot of humans sounded nice when they weren't afraid of a sea monster.
"I don't know… I've only known him the one day," Curtis said carefully, but he seemed to have the germ of an idea. "He just started yesterday, and he's not familiar with procedures yet. He definitely won't recognize the door, and if I tell him he's supposed to be scaring in that room, there's no reason he wouldn't believe me."
"He might lose his job, too, though," Luca protested.
"No, he won't," Curtis assured him. "He was at the top of his class at MU – Waternoose had to outbid a company that wanted him to move to Lake Eerie. If we're caught, I'll take the blame. Louise is right, this is more important than her job or mine."
Luca didn't like that. He didn't want to cause any trouble for people who were trying to be nice to him. It didn't seem like he had much choice, though – he and Alberto didn't know enough about this world, while Curtis and Louise actually lived here. So all he said was, "thank you, Sir."
"All right, let's figure this out," said Louise.
She and Curtis set to work, planning how they would get the boys into the factory unseen. They decided to rent a truck and pretend they were making a delivery – then they could enter through the back of the building and avoid witnesses. From there, they would have to retrieve Rocco's door from the review department. Curtis said he would lie and say he'd written a wrong number on the form, substituting the next door in the set for Rocco's. From there, he would place it in the day's queue. After that…
… after that they weren't quite sure. Keeping Sullivan in the dark would be easy, as he was still learning and would do what he was told. Other people, however, would know that something strange was going on, and if anyone asked questions Curtis would have to improvise. As for getting the boys through the door, that was impossible to plan ahead for. They would have to just wait for an opportunity.
"It doesn't matter if you're caught," said Louise. "The only thing that matters is getting them home." Luca started to protest again, but she reached as if to grab him by the shoulders, before apparently thinking better of it and withdrawing her paws. "You said you didn't want to cause trouble and I appreciate that, but whatever trouble happens, we're adults, we can deal with it better than you can."
Luca nodded. He and Alberto didn't want to stay here, and wouldn't have been able to even if they could.
With their plan set, Louise and Curtis agreed to meet early the next morning – Curtis would bring the truck, and Louise would pretend to be an employee. They said goodnight and Curtis headed home, and Louise looked them over again. She'd been giving them uncomfortable glances throughout the planning session, perhaps bothered by them just sitting there looking them looking like creatures she'd been taught to be afraid of. Several times, she'd even checked to make sure the curtains were shut, even though she was the one who'd closed them only minutes ago.
"I guess you two need somewhere to sleep," she said.
"Yes, Madame," Luca said.
"Do you have a treehouse?" Alberto asked.
"No," said Louise, not sure what to make of that question, "but I do have a sofa bed. Get up."
The boys obediently stood, and Louise handed them the cushions to hold while she unfolded the sofa into a mattress. Then she disappeared into another room, and came back with a pair of oversized shirts. At first, Luca and Alberto couldn't figure out what they were supposed to do with these, unless make tents out of them – they were sized for large monsters, and even Massimo would have found them big.
"Nightshirts," said Louise, seeing their confusion. "I'll take your clothes down to the laundry."
"Oh, thank you!" Luca said. It would be nice to wear something clean again.
"I'm sure you'd also like a bath," Louise added. "It's in there… um… will that make you change back to normal?"
Luca and Alberto exchanged a glance. "Well, yes," said Luca, "but it wont' stay. We'll Change again when we dry out."
"It's not that one's normal and the other isn't," Alberto added. "They're both normal. It's just what we do."
"Right, sorry," said Louise. She opened the bathroom door and showed them in. "Do they all look like you? The monsters where you come from. You've both got scales and fins, and you're about the same size."
"Yes, they all look like us," said Luca, though he found it a strange thing to say. In his mind, sea monsters all looked very different from each other, even more than humans did – but to monsters who could have various numbers of legs, eyes, and wings, they probably would all look the same. "It's because we live in the water. Our fins and gills help us survive." He'd learned about evolution and how it affected organisms in school.
"That makes sense," Louise decided. She ushered them into the bathroom.
Like the rest of her apartment, this was small but comfortable. She even had several scented soaps, although they had labels like tidepool and titan arum and the boys decided to use the unscented ones. It was a marked contrast with Harry's house, which had been so over the top in the places where the family lived and so bare everywhere else. Luca and Alberto washed up, and when they came out again, clean and dry and back in human form, they found that Louise had made up the sofa bed for them with sheets and pillows. She looked disappointed to see they'd already Changed again.
"We can get wet if that would help," Luca offered.
"No, I don't want my sofa getting wet. It'll take forever to dry," Louise replied. She'd sat down on the end of the sofa bed and turned the television on, and was watching something identified by a title card as Scary Mason. The boys weren't sure where they were supposed to go, but Alberto decided to go sit down on one side of Louise, so Luca sat on the other.
"So you two are from…" Louise thought for a moment. "It was Mean Time plus one hour. I don't remember the name of the place."
"Italia," Alberto supplied. He didn't know much geography, but he'd learned to find Portorosso on a map of Europe, and was quite proud of that. Luca, the one who'd taught him, nodded.
"What's it like?" asked Louise. "All I've seen of the human world is kids' rooms at night."
"We're right by the ocean," said Luca, "and there are more hills than here."
"It's warmer, too," Alberto said. "They grow grapes in the hills and tomatoes, and olives. There's sheep, too, which are like big white sponges on legs, and they keep cheese under their wool so you have to shave them in the spring to get it out."
"In the water we raise seagrass and goatfish," Luca added, "and sturgeons for their eggs, and some of the richer families have groupers."
"The humans catch fish, but they're careful not to take the ones the sea monsters keep," Alberto said. "We've explained it to them, and they stay away from the pastures."
"It sounds like you get along very well," said Louise.
"Yeah. Humans are just people," Luca said. After his earlier revelation, he wanted to emphasize that. "I even go to school with them in Genova. That's a big city, although there are bigger ones. My friend Giulia says the biggest is Roma. They've still got buildings there that are two thousand years old. We've never been, but we're definitely gonna go someday."
Luca stopped there and thought for a moment. He was starting to have an idea… he wanted to fix the problems they'd caused Louise by being here. They couldn't do that in this monster world, but maybe they could somewhere else…
"I'm pretty much the greatest fisherman in town, except for my Dad, Massimo," Alberto said. "He's only got one arm, but he's stronger than any of the guys with two. Every morning I deliver the fish on my bike. I saved up to buy myself one, because Giulia said I wasn't allowed to ride hers anymore. I didn't even crash it on purpose."
Louise nodded. "I've never met a human I wasn't trying to scare," she admitted, "but I always got the idea they were skittish, bitey sorts of creatures, like… like raccoons or something. Like they'll attack you if they're cornered."
"Nah, they know we're good," Alberto said. "Even when people from out of town visit, their relatives just tell them we're okay and they're fine."
That seemed to be confirmation that Luca's idea was good. He took a deep breath. "Maybe you could come with us?" he suggested. He was pretty sure that taking Harry would have been a disaster, but Louise was very different.
Louise laughed. "Oh, I'm sure that would go over great!"
"No, I mean it," Luca said. "I'm sure you could get a job there. The fishermen always need help, and there are jobs on the farm at the end of summer. You'd just have to apologize to Rocco."
"Yeah!" Alberto agreed, sitting up a little straighter. "Or you could even work in the Pescheria! If they're okay with us, they'd be okay with you."
"They're okay with you two because you look like them," Louise said. "I suspect they think you're really just humans deep down, like I'm okay with you right now because I know you're actually monsters under the skin." Despite these words, she got up and moved to the ottoman again, shifting it so she could still see her detective show. "Besides, you two don't want to be away from your own kind forever, do you? Neither do I."
"Oh. You're right." Luca hadn't even thought of that. Of course he and Alberto wanted to go home. Why would Louise be any different. "Sorry."
"Don't apologize," Louise said. "I'm sure I can get another job here. There are other energy companies, even though Waternoose is doing his best to gobble them up. Or I could try something else. I do like my job. I like knowing when a light goes on that I helped make that happen. But there's other stuff in the world and maybe I wouldn't have to put up with idiots like Steve Watkins."
Once Scary Mason was over, Louise took the boys' clothing and some other laundry down to the basement, and they settled into the sofa bed. It wasn't the most comfortable bed in the world, having rarely been used and the fold lines in the mattress very distinct, but it was still better than the bed with no blankets at Harry's house. Part of it was because there was no need to fear discovery here, it was probably also because Harry had hidden them away in part of the house for things his family didn't want to think about. Louise, on the other hand, had unfolded her sofa and made room for them in her home.
"I hope we don't get her in any more trouble," Luca said.
"I don't think she minds. She seems really nice," Alberto replied with a yawn.
This was meant to make Luca feel better, but instead it seemed even more unfair that Louise was having to find a new job because of them. If Mr. Waternoose was working hard to buy up all the other scaring companies… what if he bought one and found Louise working there? Would he fire her all over again? Maybe it would be better, after all, if she just did something else.
There must be a solution. He would just have to think about it long enough.
Going to sleep at Louise's apartment was very different from Harry's house, and so was waking up. Yesterday morning they'd been alone and hungry and hadn't known what to do, and had only barely gotten away. Today they woke to sunshine and the smell of food cooking. Luca yawned and sat up, and looked towards the kitchen. Squinting in the sun that was coming directly through the window, he made out Louise at the stove. She looked back and saw him, and waved.
"Good morning," she said.
"Buongiorno, Signorina," replied Luca. He wondered what time it was. It felt very early, and if the sun was right in the window it must be quite low.
"I'm making pancakes," she said. "Want some?"
Next to Luca, Alberto stirred. "Hmm? Breakfast?" he asked. The iguana-cat had been sleeping by his feet, and it raised its head and yawned, showing off long sharp teeth.
"Yeah, frittelle!" Luca told him. "Come on, let's get dressed."
The pajamas they'd worn for their sleepover at Rocco's were now clean and dry, and while they were stained a bit from all the muddy water, it was still much better than wearing them dirty, or the giant nightshirts they'd slept in. Both Luca and Alberto were cheerful and smiling as they bounced into the kitchen.
"Here you go." Louise put plates in front of them. "I've got butter and syrup, too."
"How about Nutella?" Alberto asked.
"I think there's some here somewhere." Louise opened a cupboard. "Let me see."
Luca poured syrup on his pancake and took a big bite. Monster food seemed to taste okay, even when, like the three-eyed fish, it didn't look very appealing. The pancakes just tasted like pancakes, and the syrup like syrup… though it wasn't enough to make him regret refusing Harry's eyeball lollipops.
"Found it!" Louise put the jar of spread on the table, and Alberto dug into it with a butter knife.
"Thank you, Madame," said Luca politely.
"You're welcome."
Alberto, who always ate as if he hadn't been fed in a week, stuffed half a pancake in his mouth. "You got any kids?" he asked, around this mouthful.
"No, I don't," Louise said. "I do have two little nephews, and I spoil them rotten on their birthdays. Is the pancake that good, that you're already asking me to adopt you?"
"Nah, I'm already adopted," Alberto assured her. "I was just wondering."
A buzzer went off. Luca and Alberto looked up in alarm, but Louise just crossed to a speaker on the wall and pressed a button there. "Yes?" she asked.
"It's me," replied the voice of Curits. "I've got the truck."
Luca relaxed – of course, they'd seen the other side of that last night.
"Great, come on up," Louise said. "We're having pancakes." She pushed a different button.
Curtis knocked on the door a couple of minutes later. Louise let him in, and the iguana-cat looked up from its breakfast – a bowl of what appeared to be dried mealworms and roly-polies – to see who was there. Once the animal realized this guest was familiar, it returned to the bowl. Curtis bent down to give it a couple of pets, then stopped short as he saw Luca and Alberto sitting there eating.
After a moment, he relaxed. "Sorry," he said. "There's this old safety poster in the locker room at work, showing a human kid with blood all around its mouth, but the colours faded over the years so the blood looked brown."
Luca turned to Alberto, who had Nutella smeared around his mouth. Alberto realized what Curtis was referring to, and grinned sheepishly before wiping his mouth on a napkin. Luca giggled.
"Pancakes?" Louise asked.
"Yes, please!" Curtis pulled up a chair. "Your cooking is always a treat, Louise."
"There's no need for flattery, it's just a pancake." She handed him a plate.
"Maybe you could work at a restaurant," Luca suggested.
Curtis had been busy cutting a piece of pancake, but at that, he dropped his cutlery. "What, give up scaring?" he asked. "No way, Louise is the best!"
"She must be pretty good at it," Alberto mused. "Signora Marsigliese said Rocco never wants to go to bed at night anymore. Sometimes he sits and cries for ages after Louise has been in there."
"Sounds like my younger nephew," said Louise. "For a while he was convinced there was a human under his bed and didn't dare get up at night. He thought it would grab him if he dangled a limb over and then…" she glanced over her shoulder at the boys, then shook her head and took the last pancake out of the pan. "Well, silly thing to worry about, anyway."
They finished eating and washed the plates, and then it was time to head for the factory. They wanted to arrive by seven AM, not so early as to look suspicious, but before too many people arrived for the day. They also didn't want to frighten anybody on the way, so Alberto and Luca got wet again, and the group headed downstairs. They could hear people moving around and talking in the other apartments, but the halls of the building were empty.
They opened the front door onto the step, and there they got a shock.
A bundle of Monstropolis Argus newspapers had been left there – and these ones had a headline reading JUVENILE DELINQUENTS CAUSE CHAOS AT MONSTERS INC. Louise untied the twine and picked up the top copy, which unfolded to show a pair of police sketches that were obviously meant to be Luca and Alberto, although they looked much scarier than the boys actually were. Since the monsters here seemed to consider scariness something to aspire to, maybe they ought to be consider this a compliment.
Louise blinked at this a couple of times, then quickly folded the paper, put it back on top of the pile, and hefted the whole thing into the garbage bin. She then went and grabbed the much larger papers on the steps of the bigger building next door, while Curtis went to grab the tiny ones on the other side. These went into the bin as well, and Curtis filled two buckets with water from a spigot on the wall so that the boys wouldn't dry out in front of anyone.
The rental truck was parked in the lot. It was a big boxy vehicle, painted with a colourful underwater scene featuring a squid-like creature and text to inform the viewer that the Tully Monster was the State Fossil of Chillinois. Luca and Alberto scrambled into the back and Curtis climbed up on the bumper to pull the rolling door down.
It was almost closed when a booming voice rang out: "Louise! You're up early!"
Curtis quickly shut the back and the lock clicked, leaving the boys in warm, stuffy darkness.
"Good morning, Cynthia," said Louise. "Curtis is just helping me get some stuff from the factory."
The truck rattled as giant footsteps approached. Luca grabbed Alberto, terrified.
"You must have practically lived there!" said Sylvia's voice from high overhead. "Shame about your job. Who were those boys your friend had with him last night?"
"Uh… boys?" asked Louise.
"Alan went to check if it were still raining, and stood there like a fool with the door open," Cynthia explained. "When he finally shut the door and came back in, he said your assistant was there with two little boys."
"Oh, they're my nephews!" said Curtis. "Yeah. My sister married a fish monster from Fort Clawderdale! They want to be scarers when they grow up, and Louise is kind of their hero, so I brought them to visit."
"Very nice young monsters," Louise agreed. "Nothing like some of these delinquents you hear about. I can't stay and chat, though, I've got a lot to do today."
"Of course," said Cynthia. "I just came out for the paper, actually. Isn't it here yet? I could have sworn I heard the truck."
"Maybe he's running late," said Curtis, climbing into the cab.
"See you later, Cynthia!" Louise got in the other side, and the engine started.
Luca sat down and curled his tail around him as they pulled out into the street. What would happen when Cynthia eventually saw the paper? When it never arrived on her step she would surely go looking for one elsewhere. If this place were anything like Portorosso there would be a dozen places to get newspapers. Signor Gamacchio's store carried everything from the local Giornale to the Secolo from Genova to the Tempo all the way from Roma.
"Hey, cheer up." Alberto sat down beside him and patted him on the back. "We're going home today."
"Only if this works," said Luca.
"It will," Alberto promised him. "Louise and Curtis are good. I never trusted Harry anyway."
Luca's eyebrows rose. "Oh, you didn't?" he asked pointedly.
"I didn't! I only pretended to because I thought it was the fastest way home!" Alberto huffed.
Luca looked him right in the eyes. Alberto stayed sullen for a moment, then his shoulders sagged. "I knew it was a bad idea," he admitted. "But we needed somebody to be nice."
"Giulia says sometimes you really gotta listen to Bruno," Luca told him.
"You never know when until afterwards, though," Alberto said. "Do you think Harry's in a lot of trouble?"
"Probably," Luca sighed. His annoyance with Alberto's lie had been fleeting – yeah, trusting Harry had been a mistake, but it wasn't as if Luca had been able to think of anything better. If it had been up to him, they would probably have just been left standing in the car park until they dried out again, and heaven knew what would have happened to them then.
They'd been nothing but trouble to anyone in this world, he thought, including themselves. Why did it have to be that way? Why did everybody have to panic? It seemed that monsters of all kinds – whether land, sea, or bedroom closet – were so scared of each other when they really didn't have to be. All of them were just people.
Maybe that was what made all three monsters.