"It actually is a football stadium," Buffy said. "I can see the locker rooms... and they didn't clean anything out."
"I know," Xander agreed. "There are tons of football uniforms and padding... which thanks to Wardrobe will all fit me perfectly."
Buffy turned to look at Xander. "You're going to use that as an excuse to wear a full football outfit the entire time we're there, aren't you?"
"It will be way funnier and I don't care if they get destroyed, so yes," he said with a grin.
"Wardrobe," Willow said to herself before sighing. "Honey, none of my clothing is going to fit right now. I mean, not without being super tight." She posed and everyone noticed how tight her normally loose clothing was as her sweater actually showed off a thin strip of stomach and her pants were a bit short and very tight.
"You need Wardrobe," Xander realized.
Willow nodded and licked her lips. "If you can put off starting for ten minutes or so, we can experiment a little and see how intimate we need to be to get me that perk."
"Try and restrain yourselves as much as possible," Dawn said. "Mom says I can't have sex until I'm sixteen, but I'm pretty sure she means the real deed and if we can Clinton it, she might bend a little."
"That is actually a very good idea," Xander said. "Shall we go experiment?"
Willow beamed. "I thought you'd never ask."
The two teens vanished upstairs in a blur of speed.
"Can he share perks with me since I'm a temp and do they vanish when the contract ends?" Buffy asked curiously.
"Yes and no, once a perk has been shared its permanent, unless otherwise stated like Combat Tentacles," Amelia replied. "Clinton it?" she asked Dawn, unsure what that phrase meant.
"Oral sex doesn't count as sex," Buffy told her. "At least that's what the phrase means."
"Oral sex counts," Amelia assured her, "it doesn't even have to be mutual to activate Perk Sharing."
"It counts for sharing perks," Buffy agreed, "but if we can convince Mom it doesn't count for her no sex till sixteen rule..."
Amelia nodded. "Loopholes."
"I'm willing to work with any hole Mom allows, even if it requires lube," Dawn said.
Buffy groaned. "I am so glad you didn't say that while Mom was here."
Dawn grinned and turned to her sister. "So... how many perks are you looking to acquire? He can share all of them but Martial Brilliance and Tentacles."
"Let's face it, all of them are awesome," Buffy said, "but I'm not looking to join you guys so if Willow doesn't mind and it's not too involved... I want Wardrobe."
Dawn laughed. "Trust you to go for the clothes perk."
Buffy shook her head. "Yeah that is awesome and would save me a lot of money on clothes, but that perk means I can't be disarmed. I'll never run out of stakes in the middle of a battle and I'm just a thought away from having a crossbow in hand. That perk is a Slayer's best friend."
Dawn's eyes widened as she realized how serious this was. "Do whatever you need to, to get that perk, I'm sure Willow will completely agree."
"I know, but I still have to clear it with her first," Buffy said.
Amelia listened quietly, thinking Buffy would be a good addition to the harem when she eventually came around. "Why can't you get Tentacles?" she asked. "It's not a male only perk."
"Because it's a fifteen point perk and Xander can only share perks that cost up to ten," Dawn replied.
"Once he's paid off his contract we'll have to see about improving that," Amelia said, "but Xander can share the first two levels of the Combat Tentacles perk."
"There are levels?" Buffy asked.
Amelia nodded. "Three levels, each costing five points. Each level provides three tentacles and three feet of length to the appendages you can produce."
"So we can produce six tentacles of six foot length if he shares it?" Dawn asked.
"He'd have to share it twice, but yes," she agreed.
"I can see where guys would find it useful, but I don't see why we would want it," Buffy said.
"While sensitive they are additional limbs," Amelia pointed out, "you can sprout them from anywhere on your body, at any length up to full extension, mimicking any orifice."
"So... we could be holding hands in public while actually..." Dawn snickered.
"One of their most popular uses and why hand holding in the company is considered a lewd act," Amelia agreed.
"Hand holding is a lewd act?" Buffy asked in disbelief, seeing what she meant, but the mental disconnect was jarring. "What about sex in the missionary position for the sole purpose of procreation?"
Amelia blushed heavily and fanned her face. "So lewd!"
"I feel like I should be surprised but I'm not," Dawn decided. "I doubt Mom would buy me making new orifices as not counting for sex purposes and I'm kinda wondering what handshakes are considered in the company now."
"Men in the company clasp arms like warriors," Amelia said, "handshakes are considered tests of dominance."
"Make sure Xander knows that," Buffy said before shaking her head. "I'm surprised they don't just smack each other with their dicks."
"I'll make a note of it," Amelia said.
"I'm surprised you're so easy going about all of this," Buffy told her sister, "I expected a lot more jealousy and arguments from you."
"I love him, he loves me," Dawn said, "I've already got what I want even if I have to wait for it."
"Plus, Xander purchased the Love and Compassion perk," Amelia offered. "It increases empathy among members of the harem, allowing them to understand each other easier, which prevents problems developing."
"Handy," Buffy said.
"Most find it so, yes," Amelia agreed.
Xander and Willow came down the stairs with matching grins and perfectly fitted clothes.
"Already?" Dawn asked, surprised.
"Turns out it doesn't have to be all that involved," Willow said, "though I think the emotional component had a lot to do with it."
"Intimacy doesn't just refer to physical acts," Amelia agreed, "though considering the problems most agents have with intimacy, especially Class C, physical is considered the easier route."
Buffy took a deep breath and turned to her two best friends. "As a temporary member of the harem I'm actually able to use Perk Sharing. Wardrobe would make sure I never ran out of stakes mid battle or was ever unarmed. I could carry an entire armory and no one would know. I don't want to step on any toes here, but that single perk could save my life in tons of situations."
The two quickly hugged her, squeezing her between them.
"Dammit, you've both gotten so tall I feel even shorter now," Buffy complained, eyes moist.
"We've got a week to figure it out without resorting to lube," Xander joked, "we'll get you that perk."
"If all else fails, use the lube," Willow told her. "I'm dead serious here."
"I'm sure it won't come to that," Xander said. "We probably only have to have a couple of serious conversations to activate Perk Sharing at least once."
Buffy winced. "That sounds like it may be more painful than skipping the lube," she admitted. "Xander... you can be one of the most... intense people I know when you're being serious."
"You're afraid," Dawn realized.
"Yes, yes I am," Buffy said. "I don't want to screw things up and Xander and Willow are too important to me." She turned to Willow. "Rather than risk that... I'm just going to suck your boyfriend's dick."
Willow burst out laughing and Xander bit his tongue to keep from joining her.
Buffy blinked and then facepalmed. "Talking is really not my thing apparently."
"Buffy I think we both get what you mean," Xander told her, "and you're worrying over nothing, we love you, flaws and all."
"If Xander gets too intense you have my full permission to sit on his face," Willow told her. "That guarantees you a perk and shuts him up, win-win."
"I'd say hey, but we know it works," Xander said.
"You are both way chill about this," Buffy said, stunned.
"I got two perks," Willow said smugly, "one of which is stress defense. It is an awesome perk!"
"You had time for two perks?" Dawn asked curiously.
"Got the first one almost immediately," Willow said, "that just required a lack of clothes and some openness."
"Excellent," Dawn said. "That I can do without pushing my luck where Mom is concerned."
"But you're still going to see how far you can push things, aren't you?" Buffy asked knowingly.
Dawn nodded without a hint of shame. "If I can wear her down to fifteen being acceptable I'll be happy, but she might not go for that and in the meantime there are a whole bunch of things I want to experience and I have a man who loves me, and I mean to experience them."
"First date, walks on the beach holding hands... ignore that," Buffy said quickly. "You two need to vamoose so we can start on the contract and I need to go borrow a sword from Xander's closet."
A sword appeared in Xander's hand. "Here, I have half a dozen spares on me."
"Thank you," Buffy said. "Such an awesome perk."
"Don't do anything I wouldn't do," Dawn teased. "Except the lube thing if you have to, I only won't do that because Mom wants me to wait and there's a whole lot of other things to do first," she said thoughtfully as she grabbed Willow's hand.
"See you in a week," Willow said, "try and give her as many perks as you can."
"I will," Xander promised, waving as they vanished out the door.
"Really?" Buffy asked him, giving him a look.
"There are two perks I think you really need, one that I'm not sure if it would help or not and one that will take most of the pain out of research," Xander explained.
"Really? What are they?" she asked curiously.
"Wardrobe is a given, it's so useful for you it's insane and I can't believe I overlooked it," Xander said, "but the second one is Stress Defense, it allows you to stay calm in any situation and prevents PTSD. Let me put it this way, if you'd had it before the Master's Cave... well actually you wouldn't have gone there at all, but if the whole thing had occurred anyway... you'd have been able to handle it much better, no freaking out later, no nightmares about it."
"Okay, that's two solid," Buffy said. "That may actually be more important than the Wardrobe if I want to be honest. What's the third that may or may not be really useful?"
"Black Panther power-up," Xander replied. "Not sure if it would double what you have or do nothing because you're already there. The endurance and resistance to stabbings would probably help though."
"It would roughly double her strength and speed, as well as her healing rate," Amelia offered. "Might I suggest Broken Limiter as well? Continually increasing in strength and speed is not something to be overlooked."
"Okay, that is four solid perks I would really enjoy... like... need... ahem. What is the one you were unsure of?" Buffy asked.
"All Speak," Xander replied. "All those books filled with confusing languages suddenly become as simple as English to you."
"Okay that is five," Buffy said.
"I would suggest planning for sharing one perk a day so you don't become overwhelmed or make things too awkward," Amelia suggested.
"I can see how getting a lot of perks all at once could be overwhelming," Buffy said, blushing.
"You could go upstairs and get today's out of the way while I relocate the door to our target," Amelia suggested.
"The first one just required nudity, right?" Buffy asked.
"For me and Willow it did," Xander agreed. "There was a bit of accepting each other and being naked people."
"Well, I already got to see you naked today so it's only fair you get to see me," Buffy said, trying to sound casual. "Your bedroom?"
"Yes, that way we can be silly and jump on the bed while we do it," Xander said, making her giggle as he led her to the stairs.
Amelia smirked and tapped on a button on her phone, instantly relocating the door before having a seat to wait for them to return.
0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0
"We have to get the tentacles perk," Dawn told Willow as they left the library.
"That sounds like something we'd do after being married for a decade when things get a little boring," Willow said, "not to mention being fifteen points."
"We just need the five point first level perk of it," Dawn said. "At first level you get three tentacles up to three feet in length, and you can make the end of them any orifice you want."
"Any?" Willow asked, wide eyed instantly getting what the younger girl was hinting at.
"Any," Dawn confirmed, "and since you can make them pop out from anywhere..."
"That's how he did the tongue thing!" Willow exclaimed.
"Tongue thing?" Dawn asked eagerly.
Willow smiled broadly. "Well first we got naked together, which was really... He loves how I look. He thinks I'm beautiful and desirable and he told me so."
"And tongue?" Dawn asked.
"He was kissing me and slid a hand down," Willow gestured, "and bam! There was tongue."
"Good tongue?"
"Great tongue! The best tongue ever!" Willow exclaimed.
"Now imagine being able to do that in public without anyone knowing while you just look like you're holding hands," Dawn said.
"We need tentacles," Willow said firmly.
"That's what I'm saying," Dawn agreed.
"Wait!" Willow said. "We could have three extras while he has... ten, he'd have ten! Even between us we'd only have four each, five with lube."
"Ease back on the throttle there," Dawn said, "I'm not sure I'm ready for one yet much less... multiple."
Willow blinked. "I am getting ahead of myself. Master the one before adding more, but being able to have the one anywhere you want it at any time really makes things interesting."
"According to Amelia holding hands is considered lewd in company spaces," Dawn told her.
"That... that makes perfect sense," Willow realized. "Tell me more."
Typing By: Abyssal Angel
Beta By: Abyssal Angel and Mist of Shadows
TN: If you could form it anywhere, technically any kind of contact would be lewd... even just leaning against each other, shoulder to shoulder... O.o
TN2: Wait… if you can sprout a tentacle from any part of your body… could you sprout a tentacle from a tentacle and get super long?
AN: No, he is not an entity and we don't need any eyes bleeding fractal tentacles waving around.
TN3: r/brandnewsentence XD