A/N: To those who follow me, and those who came from King of Grimm, I bid you welcome to my self-insert Resident Evil story! That's right, I'm warning you right off the bat that this is a self-insert story.

Not just me, mind you. I dragged my best friend, his girl, and the guy he hates into this as well.

Truth be told, I haven't been easy to scare since I was a kid. I was terrified of The Grudge until I found out her actress was HOT. Ever since then, I haven't been easy to scare, so this probably won't be very scary.

I actually took more inspiration from the movie series than the game. The movies are a guilty pleasure of mine, so this is probably going to be more action than horror. Sorry.

Deep in one of Umbrella's underground facilities, in Raccoon City, a scientist was looking through a microscope, writing down the data he was collecting. He was of Central American descent, had slicked-back hair, glasses, and a goatee.

The door to the lab slid open. "Dr. Dracul?" He looked back to see two other doctors, a black man with a perfectly shaved head and defined muscles and a beautiful doctor with a red ponytail and athletic physic. "You haven't taken your lunch break, have you," the male doctor said with half-lidded eyes.

"Hm?" Dr. Dracul looked at the clock. "Ooh. Didn't even realize it was that time. Sorry, Dr. Smith."

Dr. Smith sighed before closing the door behind himself and the red-haired doctor. He looked around to see that it was just the three of them. "You know, you've really been obsessed with our latest project."

"Can you blame me, Cor? This facility has a crap ton of viruses that could end the world if released. The T-Virus is freakin' terrifying and the G-Virus ain't no joke either. That's why we're here."

"You really think our virus can cure the others," the red-headed doctor asked.

"You got it, Nat."

Nat rolled her eyes. "Dev, the three of us have been working on this new virus for almost a year now. T is complete and G is reaching its final stages. We don't even have a name for ours."

"Ah, but that's where you're wrong, my dear Natalie," Devlin said as he handed Nat the clipboard.

"The R-Virus?"

"Short for Revolution. If the T is a Tyrant and the G is a Golgotha, a Revolution will be the ones to take them down."

"Mm, pretty damn clever," Corey said with crossed arms and a nod of his head. "You'd think my sisters came up with that."

"Jade called you a while ago, right," Natalie asked. "Did she want something?"

"Something about her and Julie finally getting promoted. They're now officially S.T.A.R.S. members."

"Ooh, big leagues," Devlin said as he continued his research. "Speaking of big leagues, come here."

"Hm?" Corey walked up as Devlin stepped away from the microscope, Corey looking in. "Is that the T-Virus?"

"Yup. Injected into healthy human blood. Mine, specifically."

"Yeesh. Seeing it at work is seriously unnerving. It's like watching Animal Planet or National Geographic. It's killing all of your cells."

"And as fun as that is to watch," Devlin said as he took out a needle. "This is the real show," he said as he walked up and injected the serum into the petri dish.

"That's a lot of blue," Corey said. "What the... No fucking way."

"What," Nat asked.

"We did it. We did it! Nat, Devlin's blood! It's been cured completely! The R-Virus actually devoured the T-Virus! It's healing Devlin's cells! They're healthy again!"

"Are you kidding me," Natalie asked with a laugh.

"I ain't bullshittin', girl! Come on, look!"

Nat ran up and looked in. "OH, HELL YEAH! WE FOUND A CURE FOR THE GODDAMN T-VIRUS!" The friends then began to high-five each other.

"Months of animal testing to human trials paid off," Devlin cheered.

"Human testing," Corey asked as Natalie looked serious.

"Mm? Oh, it was just self-testing. I used my own blood as a test subject. We can experiment on rats all day long, but unless it's on an actual human, the data is only so reliable."

"Eh, he has a point," Natalie said. "Still, that was stupidly risky, even for you, Devlin."

Devlin shrugged. "We're scientists. Taking risks is what we do."

The facility fire alarm then went off.

"A fire drill," Natalie asked.

"Was there one scheduled today," Corey asked.

"We should probably-" Devlin began before the sprinklers turned on. "WHAT THE HELL?!"

"COVER THE COMPUTERS," Nat yelled.

"SHIT, THE DATA," Corey yelled as he ran to the clipboard.

"DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE DATA," Devlin yelled as he ran to a safe and punched in a code. It then opened to reveal helix vials.

Nat's eyes widened. "WAIT, IT WAS COMPLETED?!"

"JUST LAST WEEK! I MADE BATCHES OF IT, BUT I WANTED TO DO A FEW MORE EXPERIMENTS TO MAKE SURE IT WAS ABSOLUTELY PERFECT," Devlin yelled as he took a vial and loaded it into a syringe. "WE MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO SAVE THE DATA, BUT AT THE VERY LEAST, I CAN SAVE OUR LIFE'S WORK," he said as he injected himself with the virus.

Devlin then yelled out in pain.

"DEVLIN," Corey yelled in concern.

Then, a pop was heard, Devlin blinking. "Whoa. M-My back."

"What?"

"It's... better?"

"Huh," Natalie went.

"Years ago, I got into a car crash. My back felt like crap ever since. But... it feels better now. My shoulder, the aches and pains in my legs. Everything's just... wait, did the sprinklers just turn off?"

The three then realized Devlin was right.

Nat went to the door and tried the code. "This still won't open."

The three looked at each other.

"Devlin?"

"Huh?"

"How many more syringes do we have?"

The door to the lab opened, water pouring out as the three scientists walked out, Devlin holding a steel briefcase.

The three looked around the hall.

"Not even footsteps," Natalie said.

"This isn't a highly traveled area of the building, but given the circumstances, this is a bit creepy," Corey said.

"No doubt. Let's just head to the subway and get out of here," Devlin said.

AN EXCELLENT IDEA, a little girl's voice went.

"Red Queen? Didn't think I'd hear her again," Natalie said.

DR. DEVLIN DRACUL, DR. COREY SMITH, DR. NATALIE SMITH-

"What," Natalie said with a raised eyebrow.

"Hold on there, Queenie! Nat's my girl, but I haven't put a ring on it yet," Corey went.

"Yet, huh," Nat asked with a sassy smile.

"Uh... Anyway, why is she filed with my... last. . ." he and Natalie looked at Devlin.

". . . I didn't know her last name, alright?!"

"Seriously? So instead of asking me you just give me my boyfriend's last name," Natalie asks as she crosses her arms.

"I'm sorry, alright?!" Devlin gave out a heavy sigh. "Red Queen, what's the situation?"

THE T-VIRUS HAS ESCAPED.

"WHAT," Corey went.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME," Natalie roared.

"ONE OF OUR MOST DANGEROUS AND POWERFUL VIRUSES IS LOOSE?! THIS IS A PANDEMIC-LEVEL BIOHAZARD! OH, SHIT, WHAT IF WE'RE INFECTED," Devlin went.

YOU WERE.

The three looked up at the camera Red Queen was talking from.

"Were," Nat asked.

HAD YOU THREE BEEN TRULY INFECTED, I WOULD HAVE KILLED ALL THREE OF YOU AS I DID THE REST OF THE STAFF. HOWEVER, THROUGH YOUR COOPERATIVE EFFORTS, WITH IN NO SMALL PART TO DR. DRACUL'S OBSESSIVE WORK ETHIC, YOU THREE WERE ABLE TO DO WHAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE IMPOSSIBLE: YOU CREATED THE TRUE CURE TO THE T-VIRUS.

Devlin looked down at the case. "The R-Virus."

THAT CASE YOU ARE HOLDING, DR. DRACUL, HOLDS IMMEASURABLE VALUE. EVEN IF THE T-VIRUS WERE TO FULLY ESCAPE, THE R-VIRUS WOULD COUNTERACT IT. THE THREE OF YOU MUST ESCAPE AND KEEP THE SERUM IN THAT CASE AND YOUR BLOOD SAFE.

"Our blood," Corey asked.

"Are you saying we're now walking talking cures," Nat asked.

INDEED. HOWEVER, THE R-VIRUS IS STILL YOUNG COMPARED TO THE T-VIRUS. ITS FULL CAPABILITIES ARE UNKNOWN, EVEN TO THE THREE OF YOU. I HAVE UNLOCKED PASSAGEWAYS LEADING TO THE SUBWAY TRAIN. I MUST ASK YOU TO-

Static was then heard.

"Red Queen," Nat asked.

IT SEEMS I AM BEING FORCEFULLY OVERRIDDEN. I BELIEVE THAT WHOEVER CAUSED THE RELEASE OF THE T-VIRUS KNOWS OF YOUR SURVIVAL.

"Oh, don't tell me," Corey began.

THEY HAVE LOCKED NEARLY ALL OF THE PASSAGEWAYS LEADING TO THE TRAIN STATION. THOUGH THEY DO NOT HAVE FULL ACCESS TO THE FACILITY, I AM NOT ABLE TO AID YOU TO THE HEIGHT OF MY CAPABILITIES. WHAT'S MORE, MANY OF THE FACILITY FAILSAFES HAVE BEEN ACTIVATED.

"Oh, great. Death traps," Nat said. "Which means... shit."

WHOEVER HAS OVERRIDDEN MY SYSTEM IS ATTEMPTING TO KILL ALL THREE OF YOU.

"Kill us?" Natalie sighed. "Great. Perfect. We're now in the world's deadliest escape room. No, escape HOUSE!" Natalie groaned. "Is there any way we can get you full control of yourself again?"

TO DO SO, YOU MUST REACH THE CENTRAL PROCESSING CENTER WHERE MY CORE IS LOCATED. I WILL GUIDE YOU FROM THERE IN ORDER TO PREVENT THE HACKER FROM ACCESSING ANY MORE VITAL DATA.

"Smart move," Corey said. "So, what's the best way there?"

I HAVE SENT THE COORDINATES AND THE BEST ROUTE TO YOUR CELLULAR DEVICES.

Devlin took out his phone and activated it. "Oh, crap."

"Why did you say that," Nat asked before looking at Devlin's phone. "Oh, crap."

Corey looked. "The green room? . . . The fucking green room? Shit. Of course, we'd need to go through one of the most dangerous areas in the facility. Not even we had clearance to enter that."

"Like we ever wanted to," Devlin said. "I ain't goin' near there without a flamethrower."

"You might get your wish," Nat said as she pointed at the phone. "Security. It's closer to us. The facility armory is in there. With all the monsters this place makes, we're bound to get some pretty nice toys from there."

"Armory it is," Devlin said as he put away his phone.

The three were walking through the halls, not seeing anything out of the ordinary. That was until they were walking by one of the offices.

Natalie looked into one and stopped. "My god."

The men stopped and looked at her before looking into the office.

"Shit. She really did kill everyone," Corey said as he looked at the corpses on the ground.

"We should probably go," Devlin said. "The T-Virus doesn't take long to activate. No idea how long they've been dead but they won't be napping like that for long."

"Come on, Devlin," Nata said as she knocked on the glass. "You know as well as I do that it would take an RPG to damage these glasses."

"Still would rather not be seen by them," Devlin shrugged.

Nat rolled her eyes as she walked past Devlin and Corey. "Don't be such a wuss. Afraid they'll see your bad side," she asked in a mocking tone.

Then, as soon as she reached a hallway, a zombie roared as it grabbed her neck. It tried to bite her, only for Nat to push its head back with one hand. With the other, she landed an uppercut with enough force to make the zombie stumble back.

It roared at her, only for Nat to retaliate with a right cross to the chin, a left hook to the liver, then a left hook to the chin. That hook had enough force to absolutely shatter the zombie's jaw, the mouth hanging limply and swinging like a wet noodle. Natalie then reared back her fist and gave a battle roar as she threw a straight with enough speed and force to make the zombie's head cave in, meaning she DESTROYED its skull. What was even crazier was that her fist struck the forehead, meaning she shattered the hardest part of the human skull.

Natalie cracked her knuckles as she glared at the zombie. "Sorry, but I'm taken and you're not my type. Not even into that kinda play, to begin with," she said as she rubbed her neck.

"Holy crap." She looked at a wide-eyed Devlin. "I know I shouldn't be surprised, but still, seeing an ex-boxing champ in action is a sight."

Natalie's eye twitched. "The hell do you mean Ex-Champ," she asked as she turned and walked away.

"Isn't she a former champ," Devlin asked Corey.

"She still holds the title belt, Dev."

"How? We literally LIVE down here," Devlin asked as the three made their way to the armory. "Wait. Shit."

"What," Corey asked.

"I just realized... how did an infectee reach the hallway?"

The three stopped.

"Shit," Natalie went. "We need to reach the armory," she said as she tried to run.

"Hold up," Corey went as he grabbed his girlfriend's hand. "We can't rush. We have no idea how many of those things are nearby."

"You know damn well I can handle one or two of them. We've seen the recordings of past experiments. They're slow."

"And what if it's not just one or two? There could be a crowd waiting around the corner for all we know. We need to play it safe."

Nat stared at Corey before sighing. "Good point. Let's just reach the armory before we're locked out by whatever asshole hacked the Queen."

"We might wanna hurry on that," Devlin said. The couple looked toward him. They saw he was looking into the office. They looked to see that some of the corpses were starting to move and twitch, one even trying to get up.

"Time to go," Corey said as he walked away, yanking Nat along with him. Devlin followed the two just as the first zombie stood up, looked toward the glass, and roared.

Meanwhile.

A man was typing away at a computer, searching through data and files. He then looked at a camera to see the group walking through the halls.

He snarled before he looked at another camera. He then smirked when he saw the first Doberman stand up and begin to snarl.

A/N: IT BEGINS! Obviously, the beginning isn't going to be all that epic, but when is it ever awesome at the start? Still, what do you guys think? Nothing scary happened, of course, unless you count the zombie jumpscare, which I personally don't. Also, yes, Nat is an actual boxer in real life.

Hopefully you guys enjoy story and it's not TOO cringe. Self-insert stories rarely do well, if ever.

Until next time!