I

The target was simple, but Chuuya should have known that if Mori-san was sending both he and Dazai on a mission, it was either exceedingly dangerous or so important that the job required the best tactician and martial artist the Port Mafia had to offer. Perhaps it was a bit of both.

The grounds surrounding the warehouse were quiet. It was meant to be a Port Mafia storage facility but there had been rumours that a new organisation had seized it. Chuuya failed to see what was so important about this particular building that two executives were chosen for field duty but he appreciated that Mori-san knew best.

He kept watch as Dazai entered the code to unlock the doors. Nothing out of the ordinary, but two steps in, he ate his words. Gunfire rained down around them as they rushed to find cover.

"So this was your genius plan? Stroll in?" Chuuya practically growled as he carefully peered around a shipping container from his crouched position.

"In my defence, I was expecting more from you."

"From ME? What exactly are you contributing right now?"

"Besides my superior intellect?"

Chuuya rolled his eyes and stood. "Let me show you what being useful looks like." And she strode into the hailstorm of bullets, hands in his pockets.

Upon the Tainted Shadow

The bullets glowed red. They couldn't touch him, and he re-directed them along their original trajectory. He felt the satisfaction as they made contact. He turned around to find Dazai to make his point, but the brunet was no longer there.

The disorientation almost cost him. There were footsteps now, making their way towards him. Surrounding him.

"You bastards really woke up this morning and thought this was how I'd like to die?" He sneered, grey eyes practically feral. Chuuya saw the flash of metal in his periphery. Fortunately for him, he always brought knives to gunfights. He could have just as easily relied on Tainted but where was the fun in that?

They charged, and he easily side-stepped.; it was easy to quick and graceful when gravity could be ignored. They slashed, he swerved. Blades swung at his abdomen, but he caught their arm and sent his attackers flying. More experienced assailants would have known it would have the situation marginally more difficult for him had they attacked simultaneously, but they seemed afraid to get caught in each other's way. In the end, they had each been wounded enough to stay down, wounded by each other's blade.

"Well done, Chuuya-kun," a sing-song voice said over the public announcement system.

"DAZAI!" he practically screamed, "DON'T TELL ME YOU'VE BEEN SITTING IN THE OFFICE THIS WHOLE TIME."

"They have nice chairs."

Chuuya eyed his partner waving at him from a room overlooking the ground floor.

"YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS."

Aided by Tainted, Chuuya got to the first level in seconds. Some guards dressed in black were disposed on the ground. Possibly dead, from the looks of them. Dazai had placed his gun on the desk and was typing furiously, lines of code appearing on the screen in front of him.

"Is that it? What we came for?"

"Mori-san said they had some program that would be useful to the Mafia. Seems like some hacking protocol," Dazai shrugged. "But that was fun."

He turned to face Chuuya.

"Dazai, your face," Chuuya couldn't help but keep the alarm from crawling into his voice. One was surely caused by a punch to his right eye; the bruising was just coming up and the sclera was bloodshot. The other, smaller, on his left cheek, probably caused by a blade.

There was a sound behind them- the shaky unsheathing of a firearm. Chuuya was in action before his brain could fathom what was happening, moving to stand between the men on the ground and his partner but the brunet did not hesitate. In a fluid motion, his gun was back in his hand. One shot, clean, and any misconception about whether their attackers were alive were gone.

"I let myself get caught for a while," Dazai said nonchalantly, as though nothing had happened. "Needed more intel. And besides, field work is always more fun when there's some threat, no?"

Those weren't the exact words Chuuya would use, but he expected nothing less from his pseudo-suicidal partner.

"Guess now I can bandage my face as well. That'd be fun."

"Stop being an idiot. Do you have it?"

"Yep."

"Then let's go,"

They left the warehouse the same way they came and headed back to their vehicle.

"Do you know who these people were with?" Chuuya asked at last.

"Some offshoot of GSS, I think. Unimportant."

"It could be."

"Mmm," Dazai mused, "I don't think they'd be picking a fight with the Port Mafia anytime soon. Even though you didn't actually kill anyone."

"They were annoying and didn't really put up much of a fight. But why do you s.."

And then he heard the explosion as the warehouse went up in flames.

"We had explosives there?"

"The Mafia protects its resources," Dazai replied coldly, without turning around. Chuuya pursed his lips but matched the brunet's pace. It was times like this that he found Osamu Dazai particularly infuriating. He enjoyed his reputation, and sometimes Chuuya felt as though he leaned into it- the idea that he was inhuman... as though it was something to be proud of.

But if there was one thing Chuuya learned over the last couple months having him as a partner: Dazai disassociated from reality and the people around. That was all. It did not come close to making him inhuman.

They didn't say a word till they were back in the vehicle, their driver setting course for Headquarters.

"I heard you're headed out on a solo mission in the next couple weeks."

"Why does Mori-san INSIST on telling you things?"

Dazai shrugged with a smirk and continued. "Well, I am EC-static. It means I might have some quiet time."

"You would actually die if you had enough free time. Spontaneously combust."

"You think?"

"NO YOU IDIOT. Now, shut it. I want to get some rest."

Chuuya tended to fall asleep after a mission. Using Corruption necessitated a full recharge, but Tainted didn't drain his energy to that extent. Nevertheless, it was what Dazai had come to expect. He looked at the orange-haired boy beside him, hat slightly askew. Crazy how non-intimidating he looked when asleep. Strange that none of their juniors ever commented that Port Mafia Executive Nakahara fell asleep after missions.

Dazai stared out the car window, wondering if he should feel offended.

Maybe he'd go find Ango and Odasaku after he saw the Port medic today. It was somewhat unsettling that Chuuya would be away for as long as he would be, and he could use the distraction and light-hearted banter. Not that Dazai needed his partner to guarantee success but going on missions with Chuuya did not exhaust him. There was an unspoken understanding between them when they worked together.

People tended not to trust him. He understood why of course, and admittedly he enjoyed the hesitation when they wondered whether they could cross him. But Chuuya. Chuuya trusted him implicitly despite everything he knew and heard. And for Dazai, there was no one he trusted more to have his back in a fight… partially because Chuuya had already laid a claim that he had to be the one to kill him.

Charming.


II

Chuuya Nakahara heard the rumours of course.

The run-in with Mimic was a quiet affair, and the debrief was carried out with those directly involved in the case. But when a certain executive had not made a reappearance since, people would talk.

They knew better to ask him- he had never claimed the title of the keeper of Osamu Dazai, a point he was quite vocal about- but his silence carried weight. Two weeks later, he was still being sent my Mori-san on solo operations. Surely something had changed.

Dazai's friendship with Odasaku was not something Chuuya ever really cared to question. He was older, had been in the organisation for longer, with no intention to climb the ranks. They visited that unnecessarily classy bar. They had a social life out of their Port Mafia responsibilities. Dazai's friendship with Ango and Odasaku looked very different to theirs. He supposed it was because they were the only people patient enough to put up with the brunet's idiocy.

And now: Odasaku was dead and Ango revealed to be a government agent. Dazai never cared for friendship but only a fool couldn't see that Oda was important to him. Dazai was planning something, he knew. And the annoying thing about Dazai's plans was that they always worked.


III

"You told me if you put yourself in a world of violence and bloodshed, you might be able to find a reason to live. You won't find it. You should know that. Whether you're on the side that takes lives or the side that saves them, nothing beyond your own expectations will happen. Nothing in this world can fill the hole that is your loneliness. You will wander the darkness for eternity."

Sakunosuke Oda continued to haunt him long after he was gone. It was jarring to have someone see you, see straight through you, and not be terrified by the darkness that resided there.

Nothing beyond your expectations will happen.

What were his expectations? The people around him moved like pieces on a chessboard- adhering to their own rules. It made them predictable. If it seemed he was always two steps ahead, it was because the permutations of people's choices were easy to read.

So what did Oda mean? Dazai expected disappointment. He expected loss. Happiness was fleeting- like the adrenaline rush during a mission- but suffering was always there. Was he to expect the opposite?

Oda was like him, in a sense. Inducted into the Port Mafia at a young age. Trained assassin. Until one day it all changed. He met a stranger who told him he could be an author and that was the day he stopped killing.

Could people just choose to be righteous? Be good of their own free volition? Dazai couldn't imagine it for himself- that life outside the Port Mafia. He was detached enough that his job required no extra effort on his part. But in a world of light, where did a creature of darkness find a place?

Nothing in this world can fill the hole that is your loneliness.

Mori wanted Oda to die. If the threat of Mimic was that significant, he would have sent Chuuya. Chuuya who would have not died to the rip-off version of Flawless. Chuuya who would have fought with him.

But no, Mori decided that Oda needed to go on a suicide mission. The mafioso who didn't kill. One of the few people that Dazai considered a friend. All because of what? Annihilating Mimic? Forcing Dazai out of the Port Mafia one way or another?

If Sakunosuke Oda hadn't said anything, Dazai would have stayed in the Port Mafia out of pure spite- Mori's worst fears come to life. There was never any question about it. At some point, he would have succeeded Mori-san and worn the tainted, broken crown that belonged to the leader of the Port Mafia.

But the redhead was right. Good and evil didn't matter much to him but he wanted to find something worth being alive for. Revenge seemed a good a reason as any but…

"What should I do?"

He, Dazai, for the first time did not know what to do. Oda knew him in a way that many people did not. The only person who came close was possibly Chuuya but even then, the orange-haired teen was battling his own demons. Oda was someone who had already made up his mind to make it out of the darkness, and he almost did.

"Be on the side that saves people. If both sides are the same, then choose to become a good person. Save the weak, protect the orphaned. You might not see a great difference between right and wrong, but... saving others is something just a bit wonderful."

Was it? Dazai had no point of reference, but he trusted Odasaku. He trusted that he was a good person and so it was worth a try.


IV

Chuuya was too tired to be angry anymore. Mori-san had sent him on a mission to the west to quell some dispute surrounding Port Mafia loyalties. Yet another solo mission successful. He didn't ask for too many specifics, just knowing they were an enemy was enough of a reason.

He headed for his room in the headquarters, passing Dazai's along the way. The light was off and there was no sound.

So he was out… again.

"You know you could just find him. You know where to go," a voice said from behind.

He turned around, ready to shout at the person who had the gall to tell him what to do. But he found Kouyou Ozaki regarding him with mild amusement, and the anger dissipated as quickly as it flared.

"What if he doesn't want to be found?"

Kouyou made him feel young- the older sister he never had, though he was cautious not to call her Ane-san too often. She was there when he first joined the Mafia, and while not his mentor in the same way that Mori-san was Dazai's, she helped him feel settled. She was also one of the few people who witnessed first-hand the chaos that was his and Dazai's partnership.

"You already know the answer to that. You think he wants anyone to help him? No, but he probably needs it. And if the rumours are correct, and he is planning to defect, he won't survive outside the Mafia. He's a flower born and bred in the darkness. They wither in the light."

"Do you think he's actually going to?"

She deliberated for a second. "I have good reason to think he will."

Mori-san. Of course. Dazai couldn't just leave, even if he wanted to. But if he told Mori-san, then this was happening. He was losing his partner, annoying that he may be, and the closest thing to… he didn't really know what they were. But was that why Mori-san was pushing the solo missions? To test him? Whether he could he fight without Dazai? Of course he could. Martial arts and combat were where he thrived.

But even though most times, the wounds they came back with after a mission were usually caused by the other, there was no one who could replace him as a partner. They just… knew each other.

"I actually hate him," Chuuya said under his breath.

"Chuuya-kun," Kouyou whispered almost sadly, "You know you don't."


V

Chuuya knew the moment Dazai heard his approach. It was subtle- the shift in his body language the moment he knew he was being watched. It was annoying.

He said nothing as he joined the taller male at the base the hill, sparing a quick glance at the headstone of Odasaku at the top. He took a seat on the grass near to his partner. Enough space to make any threat of physical violence moot, but close enough so Dazai would know he was there.

For him.

"For someone who can control gravity, you sure make a lot of noise."

Chuuya let out a resigned sigh. Of course. But he refused to retort.

"Are you actually quiet?" Dazai turned to face him then. "Don't tell me you missed me Chuuya…"

"ME? MISS YOU? You have GOT to be kidd…"

Dazai chuckled. "I know why you're here," he said, "You can't change my mind."

"I didn't plan to. I want to know why you didn't tell me yourself."

"I thought that would be fairly obvious, even for your underdeveloped brain."

Chuuya's glowered, "Tell me why."

"Would it matter? You, Chuuya, feel this need to belong. The Port Mafia accepted and gave you answers when you needed them the most. You're not going to turn your back on them. Not for me."

"I might," Chuuya growled, "You ALWAYS do this. Think you know what's best for everyone. Think you know what I would do. Baka, you know nothing."

Dazai gave him a pointed look and Chuuya felt his heart quiver. "Run away with me, Chuuya Nakahara. Forget Mori. Forget the Mafia. But you will be hunted by the people you were once so loyal to."

Chuuya just stared at him.

Dazai scoffed and looked away. "People are fallible. They are selfish. I am not afforded the luxury of being loyal. Not to anyone and definitely not to you."

Chuuya opened his mouth to say something, but Dazai closed his eyes, and said in a softer voice. One that the redhead had never heard before.

"Do you know what it's like to live in a world that it so inherently boring? People are predictable. Situations repetitive. I'm tired of feeling that my life is meaningless. Tired that the concept of trusting others is useless to me, especially when nothing they do can surprise me. The Mafia treats us like we're disposable. There will be more mafiosos…"

"SHUT. UP."

Chuuya rolled across so now they were face to face.

"You are THE most cold-hearted idiotic suicidal schemer I have ever met."

"Wow thanks."

Chuuya ignored him. "And yet. To use Corruption means I have to trust you completely. Even though you will manipulate me like you do to everyone," he shot Dazai a look, "And you have… But I trust that I won't die from my own ability with you around."

"You make it sound like I haven't considered it."

"Like I've considered crushing your skull."

"Good luck with that."

Chuuya scoffed but continued. "You have power in the Mafia. You can be more here. Why do you need to leave? Odasaku stayed. He never killed, but he stayed." Chuuya felt his eyes prick- hot, angry. "Why do you need to leave me?"

"I want to be on the side that helps people. I want to make that choice." He felt Dazai brush the tears from his lower eyelash. "And I want you to grow up. And make choices for yourself and not because you feel indebted to someone… unless that someone is me," he added with a smirk.

"I don't know what you mean. I'm not indebted to any…"

"You taught me a lot about loyalty when I never really cared about it before. I won't take that away from you. It's perhaps your only redeemable trait."

Chuuya wanted to be annoyed but there it was again, that pang in his chest. He almost second-guessed himself. How long had he and Dazai been hovering on this line? But if this was it? The last time he and Dazai would be on the same side?

He was on his knees, Dazai's head in his hands, eyes locked. He saw the briefest look of surprise in the brunet's eyes, but he didn't push him off.

And so, ignoring the pounding in his chest, Chuuya kissed him.

He felt Dazai's hand in his hair, the other on his waist, the cheeky smile that ghosted his lips from earlier. He felt everything and nothing at once. Hyperaware of Dazai but on autopilot. At some point, his hat was no longer on his head, his orange hair threatening to spill over his face if not for the brunet.

Dazai managed to get him on his back without breaking the kiss. One of the brunet's hands now cupping his face, the other on his shoulder. He felt his hammering heart begin to slow down as he relaxed against his partner.

Chuuya struggled with the belief that he was wholly human- his entire existence up till this point had been a fight to feel like he belonged. With the Sheep. Within the Mafia.

But this was an extraordinarily human experience. This is what everyone talked about. This was…

And then Dazai gently eased away, pushing up on his hands so they were on either side of Chuuya's face.

"People are… predictable," the brunet repeated, his voice lower than usual.

Chuuya looked up at him, cheeks burning. Embarrassment, anger, frustration coursing through his veins.

"You knew I was going to kiss you?" he hissed, "I didn't know up till two seconds ago."

"It was longer than that," he smirked as Chuuya opened his mouth in indignation. "But no. I meant that was not surprising. You are too easy to read Chuuya."

Chuuya launched at him then, reversing their positions. Now Dazai was pinned to the ground by his shoulders. He looked too amused, too nonchalant, too patronising. He wanted to wipe that smug look off brunet's face, and he could if he truly wanted to, but the storm of emotion within him gave him pause.

"Are you thinking about kissing me again, Chuuya-kun?" the mischievous glint in Dazai's eyes was practically begging to be punched, if not for the angle.

He felt Dazai's free hand on one of his belt loops.

He would be lying if the thought didn't cross his mind, but desire was blunted by rage. He did not want it if it was not real.

"Is this a game for you?" he hissed.

"Everything is a game to me," Dazai said, holding eye contact in a way that unsettled the shorter male.

"I am GLAD that you're going," Chuuya spat at last, "The Mafia might actually be a more peaceful place to work."

"Most likely. And Yokohama might be safer without you running around with Corruption."

You bastard.

Chuuya moved to stand, with zero resistance from Dazai. He picked up his hat and dusted it off. Dazai sat up on his elbows, and Chuuya could see the grass stains on his white shirt.

Good.

"I'm sorry about Odasaku," Chuuya said at last, "But I hope you find what you're looking for."

"This is a gross change. I prefer when you're threatening me."

"Can you stop being a douchebag for like two minutes?"

"This is me diffusing the awkward energy. And that was better. Thank you."

"You know what? Forget it. It never happened. Good luck and good riddance. Please don't commit suicide in some dumb way."

"No promises," his voice a whisper as Chuuya huffed away.


VI

Dazai watched Chuuya storm away. He was so animated, so easy to fluster. So much more human than he was in the ways it mattered.

He recalled his last time in Bar Lupin. The last time he, Oda and Ango were together… What was it he told the traitor?

"I'm not sad. I knew this from the beginning. Whether you were with the gifted special operations division or not, anything I would never want to lose is always lost. It's a given that anything worth wanting will be lost the moment I obtain it. There's nothing worth pursuing at the cost of prolonging a life of suffering."

It was better that Chuuya was annoyed. It made him more likely to try and kill him but less likely to follow him out of the Port Mafia. After all, Mori-san would undoubtedly put a bounty on his head. The human vessel to Arahabaki? Loyal to the one person capable of ripping control of the Mafia from right under Mori's hands?

Chuuya would win, of course, But at what cost? Would they rip Yokohama apart trying to protect each other? What if they needed Corruption? Killing Dazai in that moment guaranteed both their deaths. No.

Chuuya was safer with the Mafia for now.

At the very least, he would be alive.

Dazai slid his index finger along his bottom lip. Every single contingency plan was already set. He just underestimated how kissing Chuuya Nakahara would make him feel.