When Beast Boy awoke to find himself in an unknown location, stripped to his boxers, tied up roughly to a sacrificial altar with old ropes, and under the watchful glare of a vengeful-looking Raven wearing an evil smile, his first thoughts were not of fear, but '… Ooh! I'm having this dream again!'
It wasn't until Raven approached him, eyes flaring with rage, and slapped him on the side of the head that the brief sting of pain told him that this was not, in fact, a dream.
"So… you're finally awake." Raven relished his fear and confusion. "Poor Beast Boy."
"Raven?" he struggled against the ropes. "What's going on?"
"Not Raven. Be awed, mortal, for you are in the presence of the demon queen, Azarnyothep!" As she spoke, pillars of flame erupted from the ground around her, causing him to sweat slightly more than he was already. They also illuminated the room somewhat, and Beast Boy could see that they seemed to be in an underground cavern in the middle of nowhere.
"Ok… well, nice to meet you, Azarnyothep, but I would like get out of these ropes and speak to Raven, if that's ok?"
"You will never speak to her again," she taunted sadistically, "Her body is under my control now. So concerned she was with warding off the influence of Trigon the Terrible, that she never paid much concern to any of us… lesser demons. A mistake that will cost her dearly."
Beast Boy continued to struggle against the ropes, but to no avail. He could always try shifting, but he would rather hold on to the element of surprise. Besides, in spite of the taunting of the demon possessing Raven, he had every confidence that she was fighting back from the inside and would shortly regain control of the situation. All that he had to do was stall.
"So… what are you planning on doing?"
Raven smiled proudly, knowing that the fruits of her labour were complete, and not a soul could stop her. "Oh, nothing much. Just thought I'd end the world, wiping out the entire human race in one, fell swoop of RIGHTEOUS VENGEANCE!"
"End of the world, a classic," Beast Boy acknowledged. "But… kind of difficult to pull off, don't you think?"
Raven cackled in confident glee. "That's where your friend comes in," she smiled, brandishing the body that she was possessing in pride. "Between her power, and my knowledge, we are more than capable of an act of planetary destruction. I hope you weren't too… attached to anything on this Earth."
"There's a couple of pizza places I kind of like," Beast Boy replied casually, scanning the room for anything that could help. "Any chance you could spare those?"
Possessed-Raven seemed mildly impressed at his completely nonchalant attitude, but not enough to indulge him. "No."
"Ah well. So, this 'act of planetary destruction', anything I should be concerned about?"
Raven considered for a moment that she had no need to tell him anything. But there was also no need not to indulge in some classic evil gloating, especially when she knew full well that there was nothing that he could do to disrupt her plans.
"It's a ritual," she explained. "It wasn't easy to complete, but in three simple steps, the annihilation of mankind will be at hand." She summoned a table of innocuous-looking artefacts to her side, and caressed them lovingly by hand.
"Elemental representatives from every continent," she began. "A shard of pure ice, formed miles under the pressures of the Antarctic Sea. A coquito seed, from the oldest living tree found in the fertile underbelly of the Peruvian rainforests. A chunk of Obsidian, from the depths of Yellowstone National Park. Slaked lime and brick used in the construction of the Great Wall of China. A rag dried with blood from the first gladiator battle hosted at the Colosseum. Limestone from the base of the Great Pyramid of Giza. And a drop of crystalized venom from the Australian Taipan snake."
"… Impressive!" replied Beast Boy, and he meant it. Whoever this Azarnyothep demon was, at least she was putting the effort in.
"Second… I must recite the oath of my former subjects, the same one that they used to SEAL ME AWAY aeons ago, in an act of COWARDICE and TREACHERY. How fitting… that the same words they used to entrap me for millennia, will be the architects of their downfall!" She cackled in a vindictive rage, then quickly checked her ancient texts for the final step in her evil plan. Beast Boy was beginning to panic slightly.
"And for the final part of the ritual…" Raven paused – partly for dramatic effect, and partly to double-check the magical inscription she had confirmed so carefully – before delivering the final blow to Beast Boy. "… I'm going to sit on your face."
"Alright Raven, that's enough. This isn't you! I know that you can fight – wait, what?" the changeling replied. He paused for a moment, considering every aspect of the situation – every juicy, voluptuous aspect – and then concluded. "… Yeah, alright."
Raven laughed. "That's right, you fool! Beg for mercy for yourself and the human race, only to be denied as I snuff out the pitiful flame of your soul, and the souls of the entire planet!"
"I'm actually completely okay with this," Beast Boy deadpanned.
"Yes, beg for Raven to save you, not that she can, for I am the one in control, and the last thing you see in this lifetime will be my devilish buttocks, smothering the very life from you!"
"I mean," Beast Boy continued, neither of them seeming to be listening to the other, "If you want me to act scared – if that makes it better for you, I mean – then I can totally do that. Like… oh no!" He began in mock-fear. "Please Raven! Please don't smother me under your… giant fucking demon dumpy plumpy! Your perfect pale peachy patootie! Please don't turn my tired tongue into your tortured tushie-tickler!"
Raven laughed evilly. "That's right, Beast Boy. I'm going to… wait, what did you say?"
She finally seemed to realise what he had been saying, not least because he was currently drooling and wearing the most shit-eating grin – or perhaps, ass-eating grin – that she had ever seen.
"… Why are you smiling?" she asked suspiciously.
"Uh, nervous reaction, I guess!" he lied. "So, this is seriously part of some ancient ritual? You're gonna cause the apocalypse with your hips and my lips?"
"Yes," she frowned at his lack of intimidation.
"You're gonna start Armageddon by arma-gettin' my face all smooshed up against that bubble butt?"
"… Yes," her frown deepened.
"You're gonna kick-start Doomsday by turning it into 'DAAAYUM!'-sday?"
Raven was audibly gritting her teeth, but he continued in unstoppable excitement.
"You're gonna bring about Ragnarök by Ragna-rocking my world with that wicked wagon you're draggin'? You want to watch as the light in my eyes dies betwixt your thick thighs?"
"YES!" Raven snapped. "And I'll prove it to you!" she added, almost competitively, showing Beast Boy the illustrations that accompanied the otherworldly scrolls.
Sure enough, the first image featured a nude, well-endowed succubus, overlooking a simple peasant who had been tied up with chains and restrained to the ground, pleading for his release with a horrified expression on his face. It looked as if it could have come out of any medieval tapestry, except for maybe the level of detail surrounding the succubus' naked bosom. In the next image, she was now kneeling over his face, preparing to smother him to death beneath her amazing succubooty, and the peasant, having seemingly had a change of heart, was now smiling from ear to ear and showing a very enthusiastic thumbs-up on both hands.
"So you see?" Raven explained. "As was foretold in the prophecy, as soon as mine buttocks rest upon your face, the end of days will be upon us! Are you frightened, worm?"
"Terrified," replied Beast Boy with no hesitation. "So, uh, when do we get started?"
Raven glared at the boy as if properly assessing him for the first time. He was a most unusual specimen.
"… You know, most mortals would be petrified at the thought of this fate."
"He doesn't look like he minds," Beast Boy jerked his head towards the ancient texts. Sure enough, as Raven unfurled the rest of the scroll, there was one more illustration to be found; the succubus was now sitting full-weight with her absolutely gorgeous glutes resting atop the peasant's face with a satisfied smile on her face, and the peasant… had somehow managed to assemble, ascribe, and hold up a sign that read "I DOTH ENTIRELY CONSENT-ETH TO THIS!" Raven frowned again. She hadn't noticed that part of the scripture until now.
"… Ah… I understand now. Your lack of fear. It's obvious, really."
"Yup, extremely obvious – anyway, please sit on me," the emerald boy pleaded.
"… You're not afraid because you think this death will be quick! Well, I hate to break it to you, but it is well within my abilities to ensure that you, at least, survive this world's destruction. Maybe I should bring you with me, into the new world I will create and preside over. Yes, that sounds wonderful; how would you like your face to be my throne for all of eternity?"
She had expected fear. She had expected protests. She had expected nervous sweating. She was not expecting for hearts to appear in Beast Boy's eyes and for him to quietly whisper "… Oohhhh, mama," to himself while drooling uncontrollably. She was at least right about the sweating, although she wasn't sure if it was of the terrified variety.
"… Hmm. Alright, I understand now."
"Yep, you sure do-" Beast Boy interrupted, "Hey, all of this understanding must be really tiring for you, are you don't want to take a seat while you think through all of this?"
"You're trying to use reverse psychology on me! Ha ha ha! I truly underestimated the depths of your cunning. But it won't work, boy. A very clever trick, though. There's more going on in that head of yours than it would appear."
"My head?" Beast Boy replied incredulously. "You really think that any of the blood in my body right now is going to my head?" He nodded downwards to make his point, and Raven followed his glance to see that… well. Beast Boy may have quickly given up on trying to escape from his restraints, but the same could not be said for the bulge in his boxer shorts, which appeared to be trying to break free with an unstoppable determination.
The frown on possessed-Raven's face was becoming permanent. This wasn't at all how the ritual was supposed to go. He was supposed to plead for the safety of the planet and the human race, and beg for his life, not… beg for her to snuff it out as a captive between her cushy cheeks.
"Enough! Your mind tricks will not work on me. Time to silence you… once and for all!"
Raven cast aside her blood red cloak, revealing a truly demonic set of crimson lingerie that hugged her figure perfectly. The laces and frills were certainly flattering, but all they did was highlight the natural beauty of the dark empath's curvaceous body. Greater heroes than Beast Boy would have gladly traded their souls just for the chance to gaze upon her chest – especially as it bounced so tantalizingly as she strode purposefully towards him with a sadistically seductive smirk on her face – but Beast Boy was all about that picture-perfect ass of hers.
Raven hopped onto the altar and spun around, coming dangerously close to planting her butt on Beast Boy's dumbfounded but anticipating face.
"Well? Any last words, whelp?" she asked over her shoulder, expecting to see him quiver in fear.
Beast Boy shook his head, and then paused suddenly. "Actually, yes. Is it okay with you if I do some tongue stuff?" He may have been a pervert, but he was still a gentleman, and consent was important, even when dealing with a megalomaniac facesitting-obsessed succubus who was trying to bring about the end of the world.
Raven tutted, and promptly began to lower her bodacious booty onto his expectant face. He was so close now, just a few moments more, and…
She paused.
"Shit. I forgot to recite the oath."
"WHAT?" Beast Boy shouted with such force that she could feel his breath on her bountiful butt. Grumbling to herself, she reluctantly started to climb off the boy, only for him to interject in panic.
"Wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait… wait," he stammered. "No no no no, um, are you sure?"
To Beast Boy's immense disappointment, she was now back to standing on solid ground, and not sitting on his solid face.
"Unfortunately, yes. It should only take a minute or two. I'm sure you won't mind."
"Oh, I absolutely DO mind!" Beast Boy snapped back. "I – can't you at least sit on me while you recite it?"
Raven raised an eyebrow. "And risk performing the ritual out of order? If unsuccessful, I would need to start again, which would mean sitting on your face… again. For even longer. I'm sure you would rather avoid-"
"UM, BZZT, WRONG-O!" he interrupted childishly. She narrowed her eyes as she stared at him. He was certainly a most peculiar specimen of a man, much less of a superhero. Fearing that he was sounding a little too demanding, Beast Boy swallowed his fear – the fear that somehow, the greatest moment of his life was about to be stolen from him – and asked again, more politely.
"I mean… there's no harm in it, right? And you might as well get used to it if I'm going to be your seat for all of eternity! So… you know, just grab that ancient text or whatever, and park that keister right down on me-ster." He tried to persuade her, flashing a toothy grin with the mouth that he hoped would shortly be smooshed up against the fanny pack of this demonic shortstack.
She considered his request with unusual diplomacy. "Well… I suppose there's no harm in it…"
Beast Boy would have pumped his fist, had it not been securely tied down, as Raven grabbed a handful of old parchment and began the climb back onto his face. The view was… indescribable, but if Beast Boy had been forced to put it into words, he would have simply said that it was a sight worth ending the world for.
"Have you made your peace, said your goodbyes? It's the end of the world as we know it…" she leered.
"And I feel fine!" Beast Boy concluded with a grin, lying back and waiting for the karmic jackpot that awaited him.
Raven lowered her delicious ass lower and lower, until all light in the cave had been blotted out, and all that he could see was her utterly flawless behind. This truly felt like his destiny. Eternity couldn't come quickly enough.
And then, just as before… she paused.
"Beast Boy?" she whispered, and he panicked. That wasn't the voice of possessed-Raven. That was the voice of Raven.
Oh, shit.
"Beast Boy!" she cried out in alarm, hurriedly hopping off of his face and turning to face him. Suddenly very aware of how little she was wearing, her face flushed as red as the scarlet lingerie she was modelling, and she frantically grabbed her discarded cape and wrapped it back around her, to Beast Boy's disappointment.
"That was too close!" she murmured, leaning down to him and beginning to untie his restraints. "Good job distracting her. I was able to wrench back control just barely in time. Another second, and I… you…" she blushed again. "Well, we don't need to think about that?"
"Don't we?" replied Beast Boy in distress. "Hey, could you bring back the crazy red-eyed chick again? We had some unfinished business."
Assuming mere silliness on his part, Raven ignored him. "We need to get you out of here, it's only a matter of time before she retakes control of me, and we need to protect the world… at all costs!"
"I mean… do we?" Beast Boy countered. "The world had a good run, but… maybe it's time we let someone else be in charge for a bit! I bet it wouldn't even be that bad!"
Raven was shocked by his apathy towards the apocalypse, and stared into his eyes, searching for traces of enchantment. "Damn it, has she… bewitched you in some way?"
Beast Boy wasn't sure how to answer honestly. Azarnyothep had used no spells or charms to force this behaviour from him, but he certainly found the promise of spending eternity under her glorious ass to be most bewitching.
"… Yes and no," he answered cryptically, forcing an impatient grumble from Raven as she continued trying to untie him.
"Damn it, this is taking too long! Can't you just transform?" Raven asked.
Beast Boy paused for a second, appearing to Raven to be attempting and failing to escape, but secretly weighing up whether it was even worth the attempt, and easily deciding against it.
"Nope," he lied with a smugly satisfied grin, causing Raven to grumble further as she struggled with the bindings. Eventually, the ropes were loose enough for him to escape, and Raven turned to observe the preparations that had been made for the ritual.
"Hmm, I see… she really went all out with the – what in God's name are you doing?!" she snapped as she turned back towards Beast Boy, who was… tightening the ropes again, restraining himself onto the altar. Undoing all of the hard work she had done freeing him.
"What?" he replied innocently. "I just… slipped!"
"Beast Boy, be serious!" she demanded, trying again to untie him.
"Oh, I am taking this very seriously!" he responded, trying to make it as hard as possible for her to free him.
"I- Beast Boy! What the hell are you-" Raven's head snapped back, and when she leaned forwards again, Azarnyothep had returned, eyes glowing red with rage, arousal and reluctant respect.
"Ahahahaha! Very good, Beast Boy. Distracting me while your little friend tries to regain control. But I tire of these games, mortal. You will not prevent my attempt at world domination… or my attempts at dominating your face, any longer!"
And with that, she threw off her cape, hovered back over his face, and lavishly lowered her luscious loins towards his salivating mouth. Her heavenly hips wiggled and jiggled as her cushy caboose came closer, and closer… just a few millimetres more, and he would be living the eternity of his dreams.
…
"HALT, EVILDOER!"
Raven's head shot up towards the intruder. Wonder Woman had burst through the wall of the cave, flanked by Starfire, Black Canary, and a handful of other female Justice League members and honorary Titans.
"What? No!" cried Raven in frustration.
"WHAT? NOOOOOOOO!" wailed Beast Boy in much louder despair.
Raven cast one final look over her shoulder at her potential victim. He was pleading with his eyes for her to please ignore the intruders, and just plop that plush, plump, rumpy-dumpy right on his willing face. But as a demon, she could not turn down a fight, and leapt off of his criminally-disappointed dial and into the fray, while Starfire flew to Beast Boy's side and easily tore the ropes away.
"Friend Beast Boy! Oh, how wonderful that we were able to reach you in time! We received a warning that Raven had been possessed by a demon, and if we didn't find you quickly enough, we…" she trailed off as she noticed that tears were streaming down Beast Boy's face.
"You couldn't have waited a few seconds longer?" he cry-shouted in futile grief, as Starfire lifted him from the altar and began to carry him back to the entrance. Wonder Woman and Black Canary were engaged in battle with Azarnyothep, and while the demonic presence seemed to be holding her own, she was clearly on the back foot. She lunged at Black Canary, who easily tossed her over her shoulder with a judo throw, where she landed ungracefully, face down and ass proudly up in the air. Beast Boy struggled to break free from Starfire's grip, desperate to launch himself as a last-ditch effort towards the demon's delightfully devilish dumptruck. Unfortunately, Starfire's grasp was true, and not even the limitless strength of a man on a mission to mash his mush into a tasty tush was enough to overpower the Tamaranean.
Before Azarnyothep could mount a successful counterattack, she found herself bound by the lasso of truth. It glowed with the golden power of the Goddesses, as Diana, Princess of Themyscira, delivered an ultimatum.
"Begone, vile fiend! Leave this young woman's body and never return, or face destruction at the hand of my God-slaying sword!"
"Wait, no!" Beast Boy reasoned. "Can't they just be, like… roommates in the same body, or something? Maybe Azarnyothep could only come out at night, and maybe sometimes in the morning, depending on-"
Azarnyothep was momentarily distracted by Beast Boy's sincere plea on her behalf, and this was all Diana needed. The lasso of truth glowed with holy power, and the demon was exorcised from Raven's body entirely.
For a moment, the ghostly succubus hovered in the air, her true form revealed. Beast Boy's mouth dropped to the floor; he knew deep down that it was mathematically impossible to be more drop-dead gorgeous than Raven, but damn if she didn't come close. Her breasts were firmer than any chest that large had any right to be, and if anything, her backside was even plumper and juicier. He had been so close to getting to know it for all of eternity. Unbound, Azarnyothep made a desperate dive towards the changeling, only to again be restrained by Wonder Woman's lasso, apparently more than capable of snaring a spirit.
"SO… CLOSE," she gnashed her ghostly teeth in anger. "I WILL RETURN… AND WHEN I DO… I VOW THAT YOU, GREEN ONE… WILL SPEND AN EVERLASTING AGE… UNDERNEATH… MY…"
While she couldn't fight back against the lasso, she had just enough energy to turn around, proudly presenting her amazing ass to the crowd, and then delivered the heartiest, heaviest slap that Beast Boy had ever seen. Her spectral behind bounced irresistibly, and Beast Boy felt tears forming in his eyes as he could only gaze in awe at the sight of the sumptuous buttocks that he had almost been allowed to spend the rest of time worshipping.
"… Farewell, my lovely," he wept openly as she dissipated into nothingness, leaving only a few battle scars, broken dreams, and memories of the (second-)most phenomenally perfect butt that he had ever seen.
Seemingly unaware that Beast Boy's one true love had been taken from him, the rest of the heroines seemed to relax somewhat at the defeat of their foe. That is, until a growling sound emanated from the surrounding cave, and dozens of demonic figures rose to surround the group. Azarnyothep may have fought alone, but she most definitely did not arrive alone, and a small army of flaming, rock-headed, fire and brimstone demons were nearby to make sure that the death of their leader would not be in vain.
The hitherto unseen force advanced, while Wonder Woman and Black Canary, being the oldest and most experienced, stood protectively in front of the others, but took a tentative step backwards at the sight of the sheer multitude of their foes. There must have been hundreds of them.
"Be… be careful." Raven whimpered, in no condition to fight. "They're… more powerful than they appear." Wonder Woman had tangled with a few demons in her time, and she recognized the troublesome situation that they were in. Even a handful of creatures this powerful would have been a test for her, but this…
"Asmodeus," a particularly nasty-looking demon spoke from the back, "I told you that we should have advised her majesty to begin the ceremony earlier!"
"I know, Buer," came the impertinent reply, "But I was hoping that they would arrive just in time to observe the climax. To see the despair on their faces as they realised that they were too late. It would have been-"
"WHAT?!" Beast Boy cried in righteous fury, darting out from behind the heroes and charging furiously at the crowd of demons; but especially at the ones who had just spoken. Seemingly forgetting that he could transform until the last second, the demons readied themselves against this small, unprepared opponent, only to find themselves trampled or gored by an extremely angry and sexually-frustrated green rhinoceros.
Transforming back into his human self, Beast Boy snarled ferociously and extended claws from his hands, diving into the fray without a hint of self-preservation and viciously tearing apart anything that he could get his hands on.
"YOU MONSTERS!" he screamed, dicing two demons into small bloody chunks. "IF YOU HADN'T… SCREWED THIS UP!" he stabbed another demon through the chin until his claws came out of the top of his head. "I WOULD BE SUFFOCATING," he continued, whirling through the crowd like a vicious tornado, sending limbs and heads flying in every direction, "UNDER THE TWO SWEETEST PILLOWS KNOWN TO MAN!"
Beast Boy sliced the head off of another demon and kicked it into a crowd of others, where it suddenly exploded for no discernible reason, killing them all.
"I'LL KILL YOU!" he screamed, "I'LL KILL ALL OF YOU!" and he seemed to be following through on his threat. "I'LL SEND YOU ALL TO HELL!" he sliced several more demons' heads off in a single swipe, "AND THEN I'LL FIND YOU IN HELL, AND KILL YOU AGAIN, AND SEND YOU TO… SUPER-HELL!" his breakdown continued, "WHICH IS LIKE REGULAR HELL, BUT WORSE, BECAUSE…" he paused, having torn apart every demon within a five-metre radius, and leapt towards the rapidly-retreating crowd, "THE WI-FI IS GARBAGE, AND THERE'S ONLY ONE TV STATION!" He was repeatedly stabbing the corpse of a demon that was clearly already dead. "AND THE ONLY SHOW ON THE AIR IS THE FINAL SEASON OF GAME OF THRONES!"
The other heroines wanted to help, but Beast Boy was moving with such speed and ferocity that they had no chance of even reaching any of the demons before he would have dismembered them. "AND THEY DON'T EVEN SHOW THE EARLIER SEASONS, SO YOU CAN'T EVEN ENJOY THE JOURNEY, OR APPRECIATE ALL THE HARD WORK THAT THE CAST AND CREW PUT INTO THE-" Beast Boy stopped as he realised that the demon whose face he was screaming into was very thoroughly dead, along with… every other demon in the vicinity. With no-one left to take out his never-ending rage on, Beast Boy finally fell to his knees, pounding his fist against the rocky ground over and over again.
"YOU MANIACS! YOU BLEW IT UP! AH, DAMN YOU! GOD! DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!"
The solitary demon left, who had gone undetected under the remains of his slaughtered comrades, rose with a cautiously confused question. "To… hell? But… that's where we're from!"
Beast Boy glared at the offending demon with such intense hatred that their head simply exploded under the expectations of his blue-ball fuelled rage. The battle was over, and though he was victorious, it could not have felt further from a victory.
"Wow!" admired Wonder Woman, making her way towards the troubled teen. "That was… an incredibly impressive display of strength!" Beast Boy did not react at all to the compliment.
"Yeah," added Raven, arriving closer as her eyes narrowed. "I thought you said you couldn't transform?"
Beast Boy turned to her with a not-altogether-rational look of utmost betrayal in his eyes. "Well, I thought I would be getting smothered to death between your thighs right now, so I guess we're BOTH liars!" he shouted, almost crying in disappointment.
"What a wonderful performance in battle, friend!" Starfire praised, flying towards her troubled teammate, before gasping at an apparent injury. "Oh no! Are you wounded?"
"Not physically, no," Beast Boy mumbled apathetically.
"Are you sure?" Wonder Woman asked with some concern. "A certain appendage of your body appears to be… swollen," she stated, indicating hesitantly towards his extremities. He glanced down and noticed his rock-hard member darting desperately in every direction, like a dog sniffing out a treat it had been promised. Beast Boy held his head (not that one) in his hands and sighed in disappointment; a disappointment that he would never quite recover from.
"Stand down, boy," he reluctantly commanded, and with what sounded like an aggravated bark, the Beast in his boxers even more reluctantly obeyed.
Whether from the emotional rollercoaster of the day's events, having his lifelong dream thrust into his face and then so cruelly snatched away, or just the embarrassment of realising that he was standing in front of several attractive eligible superheroines in just his underwear, Beast Boy let out a primal roar of uncontained fury… and then fainted on the floor of the cave.
.
Beast Boy awoke several hours later in an unfamiliar medical bay. From the sea air and the distant sounds of combat training, he could guess that he was in Themyscira. It was nice of Diana to bring him here. He knew that the Amazons didn't have much experience with men; maybe he could persuade Diana to let a few of them sit on his face, as part of a… cultural exchange program. Something like that. Beast Boy sighed to himself. Even on the off chance that she somehow said yes, he knew that none of them would compare to Raven.
Raven… who, as he regained his senses, he realised was sitting in the bed on his left. And she was awake. And she was staring angrily at him. He gulped, knowing that he was in trouble.
"Beast Boy," Raven asked authoritatively, and he shuddered, bracing himself for death.
"Um… yes?" he replied meekly.
"… I didn't think I would ever need to have this conversation with anyone, but… as protectors of the world, we have a certain responsibility towards humanity, correct?"
Beast Boy nodded reluctantly.
"And that responsibility includes putting the needs of the entire planet before our own, selfish desires, yes?"
Beast Boy nodded again, much more reluctantly than before.
"And that means that sometimes, you have to make difficult decisions, and forego a little happiness, for the sake of the literal billions of other people on Earth, yes?"
Beast Boy nodded shamefully.
"Even if it means…" Raven sighed exasperatedly and shook her head, in disbelief at the words that were about to emerge from her mouth, "… passing up the chance to have your face sat on by a 'thicc big tiddy goth mommy gf'." She rolled her eyes at the sheer ridiculousness of what she was saying.
"Raven?" Beast Boy suddenly spoke up, sounding deadly serious.
"What," she replied in flat, exhausted monotone.
"There are some things in this world… worth dying for," he sounded so melodramatic, and yet so sincere. "Your family. Your country. But most of all… the opportunity to be smothered to death between the beautiful thighs of not just anyone, but… the thiccest, most amazing, most gorgeous, most big tiddiest, goth mommiest gf in the whole entire world." He stared at her earnestly, as if it had been the most profound thing that he had ever said. "So, no Raven. I'm sorry. But I can't promise you that I won't."
Raven found his response frustrating, embarrassing, a tiny bit flattering, but most of all, predictable.
"Then I suppose you leave me no choice…"
She hesitantly hobbled out of bed, her legs weak from lack of use, and stumbled her way over to his bed, glaring at him furiously. He was terrified… and a tiny bit aroused, but mainly terrified.
"I'm going to make a deal with you. You are never going to do something so stupid, or reckless, or dangerous ever again, understand?" Her voice left no room for disagreement, and yet he found himself doing it anyway.
"I'm sorry Rae, I can't-"
"Shut up!" she cut him off harshly, and then… she suddenly started to blush. "Obviously you're too immature and selfish to do this for nothing in return, so…"
Raven sighed in defeat, then turned back to the medical bed she had been lying on. With a single wave of her hand, it was encased in dark magic and suddenly collapsed to the floor, disassembled with ease.
"Oops. Guess I'm using yours," she muttered sarcastically, before casting off the Themysciran hospital gown she had been provided and clambering onto Beast Boy's bed. His eyes widened in shock and amazement; underneath, she had still been wearing the same devilish lingerie that her demon-possessed self had attempted to end the world in. Kneeling over his face, she spared an apprehensive glance over her shoulder to make sure that he was okay, and… well, his eyes were rapidly rotating in opposite directions, and his tongue was flopping around like a hyperactive fish, but she supposed that passed for 'okay' in the current situation.
She gently began to lower her precious posterior onto his patently perspiring profile… and then stopped, seconds before it was about to make contact, and glanced over her shoulder again, frowning.
"You will never do something so stupid again… and in return, every once in a while…" she rolled her eyes again, trying just a little bit too hard to appear as if she didn't want to do this. "I suppose I could let you… have your fun." He was silent, and she wasn't sure if he was in shock, if he had been too distracted to even hear her, or if her proposal had finally destroyed what was left of his brain. "Do you understand?" Still silence.
"I said, do you understand?!" she snapped, threateningly raising her butt a few inches further away from his face. He whimpered like a wounded puppy, and then immediately began to answer her. "Yes! Oh yes, a thousand times yes, Raven!" he said pleadingly.
"Alright… fine," she conceded, lowering herself again before pausing just before contact could be made. "You've got fifteen minutes. The underwear stays on and your hands stay by your side. Your tongue…" she blushed even more deeply. "You can use however you like. Now, go." She commanded, and finally, Beast Boy's dream was fulfilled, as she sank her soft, curvy, beautiful bootyful butt right onto his face.
Beast Boy buried his nose between her cheeks and inhaled deeply, soaking in the sweet scent of her super-duper derriere. Nuzzling deeper, the biggest, dopiest grin he had ever grinned was broken by his tongue shooting out of his mouth, lavishing praise onto any part of her body that he could reach. Raven shifted uncomfortably – or perhaps a little too comfortably – and sat up momentarily, plucking his head out of her glorious behind. It seemed a little reckless to abandon a rule that she had only just established, but… for whatever reason, she peeled the lacy thong underwear out of her ass and gently shook it down her legs.
Raven yelped in surprise as Beast Boy also couldn't help but break a rule; wrapping his arms around her upper legs and forcing her nakedness back onto his face with a start, where he immediately began to worship her ass with the passionate fervour of a fanatic. Every inch of her bottom was covered in kisses as he fully dedicated himself to her incredible ass. She may have been half-demon, but to him, in this moment, she would always be nothing less than a Goddess.
"This… actually feels kind of nice," she reluctantly admitted to herself. "Are you sure that you're-" before she could even finish, an emerald green thumbs-up rocketed from his side and into her line of view. She smirked at the confirmation, and then resumed grinding on his face. There was no reason this only had to be fun for him, after all.
Beast Boy was content. His face was finally where it belonged; underneath Raven's glorious booty, worshipping it with every ounce of passion he could muster. He may not have ushered in the apocalypse, dying in the process, but Beast Boy still had learned a valuable lesson that day.
He didn't need to be dead to find himself in heaven.
