Ibuki: Disclaimer! The author does not own any of the material appearing in the story. The OC's belong to their respective owners!
"Greetings everyone. As you know, I am Glynda Goodwitch from the popular web series, RWBY."
"And I'm Agent Texas from Red vs Blue."
Confessional - Grif (...Wait, already?)
"Just for the record, they didn't kick out any of us for doing this. They just wanted to do this so we let them. See? This is how you do it! Asking us instead of kicking us out for comical effect! Sheesh…"
End Confessional
"...Wait, did they seriously just do a confessional before we began the PSA?" Tex asked.
"Let them." Glynda responded. "Anywho, today, we are going to talk to you about a serious topic. Preparing to go back to school."
BGM: Life at Garreg Mach Monastery (Fire Emblem: Three Houses)
PSA: Back to School
"Now, I understand that some of you are dreading that the day is fast approaching, but soon that day will come and you will be back in class."
"So listen up!" Tex ordered, pumping her shotgun.
"School can-" Glynda paused, looking over at Tex. "Agent Texas, please…"
"What?"
Glynda sighed, before turning back to the camera. "School can be daunting, yes. However, if you are prepared, school can be an exciting time for you to learn. How can you prepare for school depends on who you are. Do you prepare by doing some last minute shopping or do you prepare months in advance? Your choice is entirely up to-"
"Months in advance? Come on, Glynda… let the brats enjoy some Summer Vacation."
"Yes, but the sooner they can get it done, the better they can enjoy their vacation until school starts."
"Well… I suppose you're not wrong. Still, back to school shopping doesn't typically happen until late July-early August."
"That is if you go to your general store. Shopping online is another story."
"Ah yes, online shopping… that works too." Tex nodded.
"Typically, you would need to buy the following supplies: Notebooks, pencils, erasers, pencil sharpeners-"
"Psst-" Tex looked toward the camera. "Mechanical pencils are all the rage!"
"You'll run out of lead." Glynda responded.
"So buy a shit ton of it!"
"Lead doesn't grow on trees."
"Ugh, use your imagination, Glynda…"
Confessional - Simmons
"Actually, lead isn't what you write with! It's actually graphite. You see, graphite was founded by-"
"Ugh. Simmons, just shut up! You're gonna bore everyone!"
"This is important, Grif! Anyway, as I was saying. Graphite-"
The camera dropped to the ground, leaving behind a black screen.
"What the-"
We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties. Our cameraman fell asleep. Let's get back to the main topic!
"Anyway, a pen is also optional, but you can't erase what you have written in pen, so I advise that you write carefully."
"Or you could just scribble it out and pretend it doesn't exist."
"But it leaves a black blotch on the paper!"
"Pffft, like that'll harm an essay or a math question!"
Glynda let out a sigh. "Oh brother…"
"Anyway, you're gonna want to use a computer too. That way you can give your wrist a break from writing so you won't have to experience hand cramps from writing a long essay. Of course, I don't get hand cramps."
"But your hand tends to explode."
"...When I get my hand on whoever replaced my hand with an exploding one, SO HELP ME-"
Confessional - Demoman
"Ohohoho! Okay! So Engi and I were a bit drunk the night before so the lad decided to replace Texas's hand with an explodin' one! It didn't do too much damage, it was just gonna erase anything she was holdin' along with her hand."
Confessional - Engi
"I may be drunk, but I'm still aware of my surroundings. It wouldn't kill anyone but it would cause a slight heart attack!" He let out a chuckle before fear crept in. "...She ain't gonna find out about this, will she? Cut the cameras!"
End Confessional
"Seriously, I was writing some notes for this PSA…" Tex mumbled.
Earlier…
"And please, for the love of god-" Tex mumbled while she was writing. "Do not under any circumsta-"
BOOM!
"WHAT THE FUCKING SHIT." Tex yelled, seeing where her hand used to be as her notes, and her desk, disintegrated. "OKAY, WHO REPLACED MY DAMN HAND WITH AN EXPLODING ONE WHEN I WAS ASLEEP?"
Back in the present…
"That's unfortunate…" Glynda said. "...Wait, why were you asleep? You're a robot."
"Robots need to recharge too, ya know."
"Fair enough."
Glynda cleared her throat. "While a laptop may be useful, I recommend using a school approved computer. Actually, your school may provide one for you. It is for school purposes only, so don't expect to download games or anything else. You may use that for your own personal computer. We used to have stronger computers with bigger RAM, but unfortunately, there was that… incident."
"What incident?"
"Let's just say that so many computers had viruses downloaded into them. So much unsavory things were discovered…"
Glynda shuddered at the memory. "How did they get some pictures of me wearing something like that… let alone showing off certain body parts pertaining to the legs…"
Tex sweatdropped. "You okay there?"
Glynda blinked, standing upright and regaining her composure. "Yes, I am okay."
"Okay, good, I was worried for a second there." The hell were in these photos? …Actually, I don't wanna know.
"Regardless, you should be able to have everything you need for your school supplies. Make sure you have plenty of extra supplies on hand in case if you want to do some crafting. It doesn't hurt to be prepared."
"Indeed."
Glynda gave a soft smile. "There is also the fact you may be transitioning into a new school. Naturally, elementary kids will graduate to middle school, and then high school. From there, they may decide to transition into college or not. The choice is up to them."
Confessional - Jade and Futaba
"I remember when I transferred to Beacon. I still have a lot of pens and pencils with me at all times. It helps having both options as it gives variety and, well, best to be prepared." Jade said.
Futaba giggled. "You really do think of everything."
"Perks of being a mechanic and a student." Jade said proudly, rubbing her upper lip proudly.
"I just… really admire you, dude."
Confessional - Damian Desmond
"Okay, so... word of advice for anyone going back to school? Real simple: don't talk to anyone. Don't look at anyone. Don't go anywhere. Don't sit down. Don't raise your hand. Don't. Go. To the bathroom. Don't get noticed. Don't choose the wrong locker. Don't..." Damian paused for a bit before sighing. "Ah, who am I kidding...? You guys would probably be dead or be homeschooled by the end of the school year anyway."
End Confessional
"Regardless, your first day of school is crucial. You have new teachers so you must be on your best behavior to set expectations. However, the night before school begins, I highly recommend you get a good nights sleep and eat a hearty and healthy breakfast when you wake up. You should go to bed at a reasonable time and not do anything that would disrupt your sleep schedule, like… a midnight jam-"
"One! Two! ONE TWO THREE FOUR!" Ibuki yelled, strumming her guitar as Deadpool pounded the drums as Demyx played the Sitar.
"Oh, I absolutely adore her jam sessions." Rosalina smiled.
"OI! IT'S ALREADY MIDNIGHT! SOME OF US ARE SLEEPING!" A Toad complained.
In an apartment complex, Makoto looked at Kyoko who was sound asleep with a soft smile. "How can she sleep through that noise? Heh… cute." He gently caressed her head, kissing her on the forehead.
"-Or pulling an all nighter playing video games."
"Zzzzz…" Elfilin slept soundly while Kirby snuggled next to him while BB-8 slept soundly. There was a faint glow illuminating the room as Chiaki was playing a game with her headphones on attached to the TV as to not disturb her friends.
"Soshite shō ryū ken ga tōjō…" (And here comes the Shoryuken…) Chiaki whispered while smirking, quickly using a Shoryuken, but she barely missed her opponent as her opponent proceeded to absolutely destroy her. "Damedamedame, tawagoto!" (No no no, shit!)
"GAME! Steve… WINS!"
Chiaki looked absolutely annoyed. "Kuso yarō-me." (You son of a bitch.) She grumbled.
On the other side of the screen…
"I'm not sure how I managed to pull that off, I usually stink with this dude." Cardin said before shrugging. "Well, I might as well hit the hay. Good game, whoever you are." He said as he turned it off.
Back with Chiaki…
Chiaki took a deep breath. "Wakarimashita, mōichido yarimashou. Watashi wa suru tsumori wa arimasen-" (Okay, let's do that again. I'm not going to-)
She immediately saw that the second player had already left, her eye twitched.
"Ā, 1-shō sureba hoshaku sa reru no ka?" (Oh, one win and you bail?)
Chiaki sighed. "Mariokāto o purei suru dakedesu…" (I'm just gonna play Mario Kart…)
Confessional - Chiaki
"Okay, so I tend to speak in my native tongue when I'm playing games in the middle of the night. I feel like I'm quieter when I whisper in my language. Of course, I can be quiet when I whisper in English, but… eh… personal preference."
End confessional
"-Or anything else at your disposal that would cause you to miss class the following day. It's not just for the first day. It's practically the entire school year."
"So, don't mess up!"
"Regardless, some schools, like the huntsman academies, have dorms. This is where you and your teammates can live together as one. You ought to have at least some etiquette so you won't have any issues with one another out on the field."
"Tell that to the dorks…" Tex mumbled.
"Some team contention may exist, so try and iron out anything you might have with a teammate. Otherwise, not only will your team unity hurt, but so will your grades. Not only that, it is important to study on certain topics so that you may plan ahead and improve your grades."
Confessional - Ozpin
"Believe it or not, Glynda was quite the rabblerouser when she was younger. She didn't do any homework or anything, yet she still managed to come out on top. Regardless, it's quite funny to me that she hounds students on homework. Practice what you preach, Glynda~"
End Confessional
"...I don't know why, but I feel the need to smack Ozpin for something." Glynda said.
"I feel the same with some certain folk."
"Regardless, school can be daunting, yet it can also be rewarding for your efforts. Let's just hope you don't forget about school in general… it is not meant to turn you away, especially when it involves homework. Homework is meant to help you improve!"
Confessional - Olette
"We met Sora around the beginning of the year last year, he kinda just waltzed in with his two friends uninvited. Since he's around our age I tried asking him about homework… he just looked confused for some reason…"
She sighed. "I hope he finally went to school after all that "Organization" business or whatever."
Confessional - Sora
"What? S-School? No idea what you're talking about." He rested his hands behind his head with a nervous chuckle.
"There are rumors that you left your mother high and dry when she called you down for dinner."
"D-Dinner?! What?! Mom had dinner ready when the Heartless attacked the island?! Ah shooooooot! Ah man, is she gonna make me eat cold spaghetti? Is she gonna make me eat cold fish?!"
Sora put his hands over his head. "Oh man oh man oh man oh man… HOW MANY DINNERS HAVE I MISSED?! Most importantly, did my mom forget about me when I was sleeping for a year?! Did she wonder why there was this random boy in some portraits?! DID SHE THROW THEM AWAY?! Oh man oh man oh man oh man oh MAN! THOSE WERE SOME PRICELESS MEMORIES!"
Sora is currently having a mental breakdown, please stand by
"Anyway, that is all I have to say on this subject. Remember to do well in class and make sure you don't do anything reckless that will impede your progress. Eat healthy and stay vigiliant and make sure to listen to your instructors. I am Glynda Goodwitch-"
There was silence in the air.
"...Agent Texas?" Glynda turned to see a blinking outline.
"SO IT WAS YOU WHO BLEW UP MY HAND!"
"Ah cripe! Let's get out of here, lad!"
"GET BACK HERE SO I CAN STRANGLE YOU WITH YOUR OWN INTESTINES!"
Glynda sweatdropped. "Okay then… that was Agent Texas, and we will see you-"
POW!
SMASH!
CRASH!
INTENSE TEXAN AND SCOTTISH SCREAMS
"-...Next time."
Ibuki: Are they gonna be okay?
Deadpool: They're the Badland Mercs, they'll be fiiiiine.
Ibuki: *still hearing things smashing and crashing* Good point!
This PSA was all Wyvern's idea!
