Alanna's first visit with the Queen was abrupt and businesslike. She entered the room, curtsied, exchanged the proper greetings, examined the Queen, and left.

On her second visit, the Queen seemed more prepared for her. "We aren't strangers, are we?" She asked as Alanna entered.

"No, Your Majesty. We spoke several times while I was His Highness's squire," Alanna said, opting for blunt honesty.

"I remember. My son was quite fond of you - only it's hard to reconcile the lady I see before me with the young boy glued to Jonathan's side."

"I fear I often have the same struggle," Alanna said with a smile.

They went back to speaking only when necessary for the examination until Alanna began packing up her things to leave.

"Everything appears to be as it should be, Your Majesty."

"Thank you," Lianne said quietly. "I understand I have you to thank for that."

"Along with your son and Sir Myles," Alanna responded meekly.

"I've already thanked them," the Queen replied. "It is to you I still owe my gratitude."

"It is an honor to serve my queen and the mother of my prince," Alanna said quietly as she curtsied, then left.


The next day, Jonathan appeared at the door of the rooms she shared with Thom, asking to speak with both of them.

"I was hoping for a favor, Master Thom."

"Name it, Highness."

"I've been looking for more advanced training with my gift, but so far, it has been tricky. I'm sure you'll be shocked to learn that my late cousin was not the most forth-coming teacher."

Thom smirked. "I'm sure he wasn't. I'll admit that I have little experience instructing others, but I'll do what I can. What is it you wish to learn?"

"Battle magic or shielding I can do from afar. I charge into battle at the head of my troops, but then I'm quickly surrounded by my men, and I'm afraid I become rather useless in the heat of the battle. I'd like to change that."

Thom nodded, clearly already caught up in his own thoughts about what his own power could do in such a situation.

"Alanna, I'd like you to join us," Jonathan continued. "I know you're becoming quite advanced in healing, but you might as well learn this sort of thing too."

Even before she had become his squire, Alanna had learned to interpret the slight tonal shifts that Jonathan used to indicate whether such a statement was simply a suggestion or a royal command. This time it was the latter. (He had used the request tone when he had told her to come to the palace, but George didn't need to know that).

Alanna still felt some residual squeamishness at using her gift in such a way, especially when she had become used to seeing it as the power to preserve life, not take it. But her old instincts of swift obedience to Jon kicked in, and she merely nodded in acquiescence.

"Excellent idea," Thom agreed. "We can talk things over here, but we'll likely need to go a ways away from the palace for safety if you want to get any real practice in."

Alanna perked up significantly at this. "If we're already somewhere isolated, we can spar as well! And no one will ask questions about why you're bringing a healer along when you're off to practice dangerous magic."

"Splendid," Jonathan agreed. "We'll start tomorrow."


The Court quickly got used to seeing Jonathan spending his free time with the Lord and Lady of Trebond, either in their rooms or off on long rides together. Various members of Jonathan's circle regularly joined these rides, and if they never made the journey without their swords, no one thought anything of it.

Thom did teach them magic, but they were not so studious as they might have appeared. Thom quickly learned that Jonathan and his friends were partially just seeking his sister's company. Occasionally he joined in their leisure or watched their sparring, but more often, he found it easy enough to get absorbed in his own pursuits and ignore the others.

However, Thom didn't miss how the Prince would sit closer to Alanna than he needed to and found excuses to touch her more often than was entirely proper. But Thom didn't do anything to stop it. Alanna appeared to be enjoying it. And there were worse things than being the most powerful sorcerer in the land and twin to royalty.


Alanna wasn't quite sure how, but Thom and Jon convinced her to attend another formal gathering after the first hadn't been a total misery. This one was a party. The last one had been a ball. Alanna realized that she couldn't articulate the difference between the two, despite her years at the palace.

It took Alanna less than five minutes to regret her attendance when the first person who greeted them was none other than Delia of Eldorne.

"Lady Alanna, isn't it?" The girl greeted enthusiastically. "I used to dance with your brother Alan. I was distraught to hear the news - he was such a delight. But come, get a glass of punch with me. We must get to know each other!"

Alanna was too shocked to do anything but follow.

Delia occasionally asked her a question to which she gave short responses, but mostly the girl talked about herself, the palace, and the eligible men.

Alanna had to take a very large gulp of her drink to prevent herself from reacting when Delia informed her, "the Prince is the ultimate prize, of course, but I would avoid him if I were you. He plays games and drops girls as easily as he picks them up."

Finally, she turned to Alanna and asked, "So...tell me about your brother. Is he really as powerful as they say? Does he have his eye on anyone yet?"

"He is that powerful," Alanna said, "but he was also shut up in the cloisters for a very long time. Not very sociable. I doubt he'd be your type."

"Ooh, well, we noble ladies must be charitable, right? Maybe he just needs the right guide into Court life." With this, Delia hooked a hand through Alanna's arm and practically dragged her towards her brother. "You must introduce me."

Agan, feeling trapped, Alanna did as she was told. "Thom, this is Lady Delia. Lady Delia, Lord Thom."

"It's a pleasure to meet you. Your sister and I were just having the most lovely conversation." She presented her hand for a kiss, and Alanna was horrified to see the same look on Thom's face that she had seen on her friends' faces when they first met Delia.

"I would love to hear more about your magical studies!" Delia gushed.

"You wouldn't understand them," Thom said, love-struck, but still Thom.

Alanna could see Delia's annoyance at that response, but she covered it with a giggle. "I'm sure you're right. Perhaps we should dance? Then I'm sure we can find something in common."

She swept Thom off to the dance floor, and Alanna soon found herself presented with a steady stream of dance partners. She figured this was just because she was new and different. Surely they would see her bad dancing and tire of her soon.

A few other women tried to strike up conversations with her, but she gave them short if polite replies, and they gave up quickly. She looked to her old friends for company, and, Delia aside, the night was, again, not completely awful.


Healing with Duke Baird was an education all its own. The wounds and illnesses tended to be much milder than what she had seen in the lower city. She mainly dealt with injuries gained on the practice courts or the typical ailments that came with aging.

Alanna was relieved to find that there was rarely anything unusually disgusting or heartbreaking to tend with. Still, a part of her also felt torn as she watched Duke Baird use his incredible skill. She was glad this man was here if Jonathan ever needed him, but she couldn't shake the melancholy feeling when she saw the people with the least need have access to the best care. That was just how life worked, but she didn't have to like it.

Baird helped her feel and understand the make-up of the human body in a way that she never had before. This knowledge enabled her to heal with intention and precision instead of the sloppier sort of bust of healing magic that she first learned to use.

The palace also started to feel friendlier as she began to recognize people from her interactions with them as Alanna, not Alan. A noblewoman who she had previously thought of as the-girl-who's-shoe-heal-I-broke-with-my-poor-dancing became Jonetta-whose-sprained-ankle-I-healed. And older courtiers who hadn't given her a second look before now smiled in gratitude when they passed her in the halls as they flexed previously aching joints.


The following morning, she went off in search of Myles. It was what had been their weekly tea time, and Alanna wanted to restart the ritual, just at the palace.

She found his study empty except for a maid who was tidying up. Poor girl, Alanna thought, but the girl appeared unphased by the disheveled room.

"Have you seen Sir Myles?" Alanna asked.

"No, your Ladyship, but he's gone for a few hours every week at this time."

Interesting, Alanna thought as she left the room.

Later that evening, she found him in the great hall at dinner.

"I came looking for you today, wondering if you might want to resume our weekly tea time, but it seems you never stopped."

Myles smiled at her. "You just can't get a decent cup of tea in the palace. I have to go all the way to the lower city to find it the way I want it."

"Right, that's what everyone says," Alanna responded. "Too bad there isn't good company in the lower city as well."

When Myles didn't say anything further, Alanna prodded, "So, are you officially courting her now? Is she a secret mistress? Are you still stubbornly declaring yourselves just friends?"

Myles sighed. "I am trying to court her. She is amenable but very cautious. Young commoner girls dream of being whisked away by noblemen, but older women begin to fear that any attention from noblemen won't end well. Unfortunately, given the behavior of some of our fellows, it's a wise kind of caution."

Alanna started to ask another question, but Myles cut her off. "That's all you'll get out of me on the subject. However, I would like to resume our tea times, just perhaps on a different day."

"Name your time. And I'll stop prying, but I must admit I'm delighted to hear that you're pursuing her. I think you would make each other very happy."


"I think they may be the closest thing to mother and father-figures that I have, since the premature death of my own parents. I suppose it's a bit of a childish fancy to see them together," Alanna confided to Jon the next day as she performed his weekly physical.

"It's not childish. You've led a tumultuous life, and you're only eighteen. It's natural to crave that kind of stable connection."

They were quiet for a moment until Jonathan let out a laugh. "Alanna the matchmaker," Jonathan said. "I didn't see that one coming. That's a very noble lady-like thing to do. And I hadn't pictured Myles as anything other than a bachelor, but good for him!"

"I guess none of us are too old to grow and change, Alanna replied. "Quiet for a moment, I need to hear your vitals."

Alanna frowned. "Your heart rate is quite fast. You didn't run or do hard exercise just before I got here, did you?"

"No," Jonathan said slowly. "My heart rate is up because I've been working up the courage to do this."

They were already standing close and facing each other. Jonathan closed the gap, wrapped his arms around her, and kissed her gently.

She returned the kiss but pulled away before it got too deep. "You could have waited until I finished the exam, at least."

"My apologies," Jonathan said huskily. "By all means, continue."

They both tried to pretend that they didn't notice her hands shaking slightly as she finished scanning him with her gift.

"Physically, you're in good health," she said finally. "Although I can't speak for your judgment."

"My judgment has never been better," Jonathan said coolly.

He moved in to kiss her again and sighed heavily when she took a step back.

"Don't fight what has to be. You know it as well as I do."

"I know no such thing. You're the heir. You have responsibilities."

"That doesn't change the fact that we belong to each other. Can you honestly tell me you don't want this?"

"Jonathan, please," Alanna replied softly.

"Will you sit down and let me pour you a drink?" Jonathan asked.

Alanna nodded and followed him to a nearby couch. Jonathan waited until she had a few sips of wine before meeting her eyes again.

"I've wanted more than friendship from you since you were fifteen, but I thought it would be wrong to act on it. When I finally caved and kissed you, it was a long time in coming. Since then, you've remained loyal to me even when I failed to help you. You've continued to be one of my best friends. You saved Mother, and probably Father and me as well. Now you're here, and I'm done holding back."

Alanna shook her head, "But it isn't about what we want. Your parents would never allow it. And if people saw you courting me, they would dig into my past, and my secrets wouldn't stay secret for long, and it would be a scandal."

"I don't care."

"I do! You need to marry soon for the good of the realm anyway."

"Tell me truly: if it weren't for those complications, would you want to be with me?"

She stared into her wine cup for a moment until Jonathan put two fingers under her chin, forcing her to meet his eyes. "It's a simple question, and I want the truth."

"Yes," she breathed. "Gods, Jonathan, after everything, how could I not?"

"Good," he said with a satisfied smile, letting her go. "Then the answer is simple. We keep our affair secret. Thom will have to know, of course, but no one else."

At Alanna's agonized look, Jonathan added, "I know. You're tired of the lies and secrets, but this is different. It isn't life or death. If people do find out, they won't think of it as anything more than juicy gossip. I don't have to tell you that you wouldn't be the first courtier I've taken to my bed. If we're secretive about it, even badly secretive, no one will start whispering about our betrothal."

"You've thought of everything, haven't you?"

"Oh, my dear Alanna," Jonathan said, pulling her to him. "We have not yet scratched the surface of all the things I've thought about concerning you."

Alanna wasn't sure she had actually agreed to anything, but several minutes of his ministrations later, she didn't care.