To recap on the journeys of our homeboys, them playas finally made their asses to Rivenhell. They ran into some bullshit like getting pulled over and doing some overnight time in prison for shrooms and shit (thanks, Pipdiddy) but luckily Araporn knew a few homies that bailed them out. After that went down they finally made it to Rivenhell, where they were finally called in by some stupid ass bitch with some pointy ears for a "council". Yolo knew it was an AA meeting, he and his friends' hobbit asses rolled in blacked out and passed out drunk on the front porch of Elrond, the head gangsta who runs this joint.

Later that morning, Yolo saw Ganddawg getting alley head and yelled

"Yo homie, where was you? Why weren't you at the prancing pony?"

Ganddawg pimp slapped that ho off his sausage and let out a sore, sad smile as Yolo noticed a few scars on his face.

"I'm sorry, Yolo… I was delayed. I fucked my homeboy Sarumane's bitch, Pokemane, and he locked me up in his DnD Dungeon."

"A pimpship with Sarumane is not likely thrown aside" Ganddawg finished.

Don't wanna bore you with some bullshit on how Dildo went crazy when he saw the cockring on Yolo and tried to snag that shit (Dildo SWORE it was the bathsalts talkin') and how Elrond invited Yolo to a "meeting" (or whatever the f*** that's supposed to mean). I definitely don't wanna bore you on how Araporn and his main chick Arwen were busting it out in the bushes the night before this meeting before Araporn broke it off with Arwen, stating the usual "It's not you, its me"

Arwen didn't give him a magic necklace, but she did give him AIDS.

Day of the meeting

As Yolo approached the council meeting, he quickly realized that it wasn't an AA meeting but something more urgent. 20 members stood around a large circle. A gang of elves sat in the far east corner, a gang of men in the far west. In the center stood a group of dwarves. Yolo whiffed a trail of kush in the air- this was a smoke sesh. Yolo relaxed and took a swig of his flask.

Shit got wild- homies smashed some white widow to Richard Mille Plain. Blingli, one of the dwarves, whipped out a gravity bong and ripped a hit as his gold chains rattled in the wind. Pipdiddy was breakdancing with Merry in the center as Araporn's ass was passed out in the corner. One of the guys in the group, a pretty boy named Whoromir began to steal some of Araporn's shit, mumbling "Bongdor needs no king"

As time passed and the homies began to regain their senses, Elrond finally walked back to his main chair, eyes red, and began.

"Alright homies. We know why you all here. We found the ring of the enemy. Yolo, bring out the ring.

Yolo walked over and placed the cock ring on the table. Everyone let out a gasp.

"Shit just got real!" cried Kevin Hart, one of the dwarves in the council.

Ya'll have only one choice- The ring must be destroyed.

A sense of silence permeated the air, until Blingli stood up from his seat, eyes red as fuck, and whipped out his Uzi,

"Bet."

He began firing at the cockring until the bullets rang dry. After a round of bullets, the cockring stood unharmed.

Bullets ran dry, but the ring remained.

Part 2 of the Council meeting to come….