Hey there everyone, it's nice to continue making more chapters after the first one. I really like how my story is turning out so far, and I'm excited to show you what I'm about to bring to this chapter, because this one has a lot more humor compared to the first.
Let's begin chapter 2 of the story!
Laughing Joking Numbnuts
Church and the others are on top of Blue base. They're all currently standing next to Caboose who is holding a sniper rifle, and is having a problem trying to aim it properly, causing Church to be frustrated everytime he sees him mishandling his sniper rifle.
"See him there? Right there, the yellow one." Church said to Caboose.
"The one next to Simmons, that's Grif." Caboose said, holding the sniper rifle in an awkward position.
"The OTHER yellow one." Church stated.
"W-what? The pretty yellow lady with a lotta hair?" Caboose asked. "She probably wrestles bears."
"Uh, Caboose? That's my sister Yang." Ruby pointed out.
"My sister Yang, got it!" Caboose said.
"No! I meant the other OTHER yellow one, dumbass!" Church exclaimed.
"Is he always like this? He looks a bit… challenged." Weiss asked.
"You have no idea how little that narrows down." Church replied.
"Oh, that new yellow person!" Caboose said. "Ye-oh yes, of course, yes, uh… he looks very scary, yes! And I know that because I am looking right at him! Right now! Yes! He's yellow! This is very interesting!"
Church sighed heavily. "You don't even see him, do you?"
"Y-yeah, I don't even know how to use this thing." Caboose replied.
"Oh man…" Church said.
"You know Church if you want, I can handle using that sniper rifle." Ruby asked.
"Wh-what? No, Ruby, I know you want to do something to help us out, but I can't allow a teenager to use the sniper rifle, besides what do you know anything about using guns? Aren't you like fifteen?" Church asked.
"Well… yeah, but I'm kind of a gun nut when it comes to weapons, I always train with my Uncle Qrow back when I was in Signal Academy. He really is one of the best teachers I could've ask for!" Ruby said with glee.
"What the fu- What kind of Uncle would take their kid and teach them to use guns!?" Church exclaimed. "Like for what specific reason? You girls don't look like you can put up with that much of a fight… well… maybe your sister, but… for what purpose would he let you use guns, hunting animals?"
"We hunt-"
"Ruby!" Weiss whispered to Ruby, signaling her to not mention anything else.
"We, uh… I mean… it's… just a personal hobby of mine, ya know?" Ruby said, relieving Weiss.
Church sighed. "You know what? Forget I ask, what the Red team have right now is no good, yellow armor… what does yellow armor mean…? Is it some kind of… special ops guy or… man this can't be good for us."
"What if it's a new gun?" Caboose asked.
"What? Why am I even talking to you IT'S A PERSON!" Church yelled. "In yellow armor! We already established that!"
"Oh no, wait, maybe they got their own medic!" Caboose guessed.
"A medic? Caboose, we're not that lucky." Church replied.
Doc is outside near the Blue base, and is talking to Tucker's little alien.
"See? My suit is purple! Can you say purple?" Doc asked. "Pur-"
"Honk?" The alien responded.
"Ple!" Doc said.
"Honk!" The alien yelled.
"Great! Once we learn all the colors, we'll learn how you shouldn't judge people by them!" Doc said.
"Yeah, that guy is definitely some kind of special forces." Church said. "Probably trained in… knives or… ball kickin' or something."
"Ball kicking? You truly believe kicking someone's pelvis is considered a skill?" Weiss questioned.
"Aw don't give me that! I'm just making shit up as we go, like how am I suppose to know what the Reds have over there anyway!?" Church exclaimed.
"Maybe he's an alien." Caboose guessed.
"An alien that looks like the rest of us?" Church questioned.
"And that is the scariest kind of alien." Caboose replied.
"An alien with shapeshifting powers that can disguise itself as anyone of us…? Ugh, I'm gonna have nightmares for weeks." Ruby shuddered at the thought.
"Why are you three even here? It would be easier for me to call random people on the phone and talk to them about this. They would understand the situation better." Church complained.
"I beg to differ, that phone conversation you had with Vic, or whatever, didn't seem like you had the best time dealing with the voicemail by threatening to stab them, despite it being nonexistent." Weiss pointed out.
"Hey, that computer phone lady is a bitch, and she deserves every second of what's coming to her!" Church yelled.
Behind the three of them, a teal armored color soldier, who is presumably Tucker, began walking towards them, he's holding his body in pain, with his arms, due to the experience of committing child birth as a male. They all turn to look at Tucker, who is making weird noises while shaking his head.
"Oh, look who's awake." Church said mockingly.
"Is this Tucker, one of your teammates that you mentioned?" Ruby asked.
"Yeah, this is him alright, and also, we're not teammates." Church said.
"He doesn't look like he's in good condition to be walking properly." Weiss observed.
"What the fuck happened?" Tucker asked.
"Oh, well… uh… a-as you may remember, uh you were impregnated by an alien visitor who was on a noble mission to save his entire species fro-"
"Can I get the short version of this?" Tucker asked, interrupting Caboose.
"Yeah, ya got knocked up; ya got knocked out." Church replied.
"What does that mean?" Ruby asked.
Weiss grimaced at what Church said. "Ruby, it's best to not ask questions you aren't prepared to handle the answers to."
"I-I mean I know he was pregnant, but I was just curious on what did he mean by-"
"Look can we all just move on from this conversation, ok!?" Church shouted, not wanting to get himself into an awkward situation.
"Church, who are these two chicks?" Tucker asked.
"They're Ruby and Weiss, just some girls who got themselves lost, and are helping us out until we find a way to send them back home to… wherever they came from." Church explained.
Weiss sighed. "This whole mess is pretty hard to deal with right now."
"Aw don't worry baby, I know what it feels like when it comes to being hard in a lot of messes, bow chicka bow OW!" Tucker was kicked in his pelvis by Weiss, causing him to fall on his knees, covering his crotch with his hands in pain.
"Weiss!" Ruby yelled.
"Hey, if you ask me, he deserves it for being a disgusting simpleton!" Weiss exclaimed while blushing.
"That's… where… the baby… came out…" Tucker wearily said, trying to catch his breath.
"You know what? I'm starting to understand how ball kicking someone can be a useful skill." Weiss said to Church.
Church chuckled. "Heh, ok, that made my day by just a little. Oh, and by the way Tucker, they're both underaged."
"WHAT!?" Tucker yelled. "How the hell was I suppose to know that? What am I? Some human age detecting machine?"
"You need help…" Church replied.
"You feeling alright Tucker? You know after the whole… alien pregnancy?" Ruby asked.
Tucker then stands back up. "Oh right, I need to start working out, lose all this baby weight."
"Yeah, you know w-we should all start working out you know uh, especially some of us." Caboose whispered, hinting at Church.
"That is something I can agree with." Weiss said.
"Yeah, some of us seem to have let ourselves go more than others." Tucker said, staring at Church.
"Are you guys talking about me?" Church asked.
"I know we only met recently, but you can be… cranky than the rest of us." Ruby said.
"We uh didn't want to say anything." Caboose said.
"Yeah, that's why we said something… Fattie!" Tucker said.
"Tucker that's kind of mean to say to your friend." Ruby said.
"Oh, you'll get used to it, we're technically all like this, it's our way of showing how much we appreciate each other, by calling out their shit." Tucker explained.
"Hey back off guys, I've been under a lot of stress." Church said. "I've been carrying this team."
"Where'd you carry us, to the buffet?" Tucker said sarcastically.
"He said it." Caboose muttered.
"What are you guys doing up here anyway? And what's that huge thing?" Tucker asked.
"That's Church." Caboose said.
Weiss rolled her eyes. "Caboose, he was talking about the ship."
"He said it." Caboose replied.
"The Reds called in a ship and it landed on Donut. Now they've got new hardware, and a new soldier." Church said.
"Who? That girl?" Tucker asked.
"Wha- girl!? That's a girl!?" Church exclaimed.
"Duh! The yellow one, right? The one talking to Simmons?" Tucker said.
"Wow, you have really good eyes." Caboose complimented.
"How can you see something that far away? We're like 300 feet from here!" Weiss questioned.
"I have too. I never get to use the fucking sniper rifle." Tucker replied.
"You trained yourself to do that?" Ruby asked. "I wonder if I can do that as well?"
"You're positive that's a girl? How can you be so sure?" Church asked.
"Dude, look who you're talking to." Tucker said. "I also see two more chicks near the Reds as well."
"Oh, the one in yellow is my sister Yang, and the one with the black bow is our friend Blake." Ruby said.
"Really…?" Tucker grinned, underneath his helmet. "How good are they in-"
"They're all underaged as well." Church said.
"Even the one with the big boo-"
"Un-der-aged." Church emphasized.
"I've never met someone who can be so shameless… until now…" Weiss said, not liking Tucker.
"Aw what? The only time we ever have chicks around here, and they're just some kids? This blows… and not in a good way… it just… blows blow…" Tucker groaned.
"You need help… like really bad…" Church suggested.
The Reds and the other two members of Team RWBY, are talking to Grif's Sister, Kaikaina, who is still having a conversation with them from earlier.
"The cool thing, is that I was lucky enough to get sent here." Kaikaina said. "They said your commander died, and I needed to replace the missing man."
"What? Our commander's not dead I'M THE COMMANDER!" Sarge yelled.
"And an excellent one at the sir!" Simmons complimented Sarge.
"Thank you, Simmons." Sarge replied.
"*cough* loser alert *cough*" Yang muttered.
"Normally I would use the word kiss ass, but your insults are just as good." Grif complimented Yang.
"Yeah, your commander died, and one of the troops was going to be promoted, and I was sent to replace the missing troop." Kaikaina explained.
"Wha-wha-what's this about a promotion?" Simmons asked, as he went up to her.
"Now this is about to get interesting." Yang whispered to Blake, which she rolled her eyes in response.
"Sounds like Command made some kind of mistake." Sarge said.
"I dunno Sarge, I thought you said Command never MAKES mistakes. That must mean you're dead." Grif pointed out.
"Seriously, what was the promotion thing?" Simmons asked. "I'm sure I heard something about someone getting promoted."
"They said that one of your troops will be promoted to replace your dead C.O." Kaikaina replied.
"One in particular? One like me? A maroon one?" Simmons asked, hoping to be promoted.
"Hey… you're really scary… it's kind of hot!" Kaikaina said to Simmons.
"Wait what?" Blake said in confusion.
"Sarge, I'm really sorry you died." Grif said.
"Yeah, I'm… really sad to see you go… pffft your sacrifice will not be in vain." Yang placed her hand on his shoulder, while also trying to contain her laughter.
Blake sighed. "Don't encourage him Yang."
"Don't be stupid you two! How can I be dead if I'm standing right here!?" Sarge exclaimed.
"Well, if Command is wrong about you dying Sarge, couldn't they be wrong about other stuff too?" Grif asked. "Like… like… what if the Blues don't suck? *GASP* What if the Blues are awesome!? This changes everything!"
Sarge stared at nothing, as he was getting lost in his deep thoughts, realizing the possibility of Command being wrong, and about everything else.
"Sarge, you can't be falling for something this stupid? You do realize he's lying? Right?" Blake asked.
Sarge didn't give her an answer, he was still unsure on what he was about to do next.
The rest of the gang are now near a dug-up grave, with Sarge getting near it, there's also a heart full of flowers that says "Goodbye Sarge and Donut" written on it. Grif and Yang watched in amusement, while Blake facepalmed at what she's witnessing.
"Dearly beloved… we are gathered here today to pay our final respects to Sarge." Simmons fake crying a eulogy speech.
"But I was so young! And Violent!" Sarge yelled in sadness.
Blake shook her head. "You have got to be kidding me…"
"You have to admit this is pretty fun to watch!" Yang whispered to Blake.
"We were supposed to help the Reds, so we can find a way back to Beacon Academy, not getting ourselves into a fake funeral!" Blake whispered to Yang in irritation.
"You worry too much. These guys aren't that bad, sure a few screws loose, but it wouldn't hurt to have some fun every now and then." Yang said.
"I don't think burying someone alive can be considered the definition of fun. *Sigh* Fine, whatever, let's just get this over with!" Blake replied impatiently.
"And that's what makes this so tragic." Grif said, while Sarge is crying.
"And now, Grif has asked to say a few things about our beloved Sarge." Simmons said, as Grif went up to Sarge.
"Hey everybody, it's great to be here!" Grif said. "Well, what can I say about a guy like Sarge? I mean besides good riddance? Heyooo!" Grif, Yang, and Kaikaina started laughing, while Blake gave them disapproval looks.
"But seriously, Sarge lived a great life, and now that he's dead, our lives are pretty good too! Zing!" Grif shouted. "Hahaha… you know what I'm talking about."
"Come on, is this a remembrance or a roast?" Sarge asked.
"Quiet in the front row." Grif said, pointing at Sarge.
"Yeah, no hecklers in the crowd, that's my job." Yang said.
"And I'm not asking, and he's not telling." Grif said. "But I heard when Donut first came to base, Sarge spent a lot of time talking about 'glazed donut holes,' if you know what I mean, Heyoooo!"
Yang started laughing at Grif's remarks towards Sarge, getting a glare from Blake.
"TOO SOON!" Simmons shouted.
"Hey now…"
"This is the worst funeral I've ever had!" Sarge complained. "You losers better step up the crying, pronto!"
"Oh, don't worry, sir! I've written a stirring speech that is sure to tug at everyone's heartstrings." Simmons reassured.
"Good to hear it, now get with the eulogizing!" Sarge commanded.
"On it sir!" Simmons replied, as he walked towards Grif.
"And who could forget the time Sarge showed us how to field-strip Simmons?" Grif asked.
"He did what!?" Blake exclaimed.
"Ok, that's enough, I said five minutes, Grif!" Simmons said.
"Bye everybody! I'll be appearing at the laugh cavern every Tuesday, ladies drink free!" Grif said.
"Whoo hoo!" Kaikaina cheered.
"I'm more of a strawberry sunrise kind of girl." Yang said.
"Not you two!" Grif said.
"Awww." Kaikaina pouted.
"Eh, it was worth a shot!" Yang joked, causing everyone to groan in annoyance.
"Are you trying to be the clown at my funeral who tries to cheer everyone up by crackin' jokes?" Sarge asked. "Because if so… it ain't workin'."
"Grif you can go now." Simmons said, Grif then left.
"Hello, everyone I'm here to say a few words about our friend, Sarge." Simmons said.
"Boo, you suck!" Grif yelled, standing right next to him.
"Get better material next time!" Yang yelled.
"Ok you do not get to say that to me after that horrible pun of yours, and Grif, get off the stage!" Simmons yelled at Grif.
"Uh, sorry." Grif apologized, as he retreated to the peanut gallery.
"There was no stage to begin with, we're standing outside." Blake mumbled.
"Ok, like I was saying, I'm here to say a few words about Sarge." Simmons said.
"Boo! You SUCK!" Grif shouted.
"You're so boring!" Yang shouted as well.
"As you all know, Sarge was a magnificent leader, and he was a great inspiration to all his troops." Simmons said, ignoring Grif and Yang's insults.
Sarge started sobbing. "Simmons is right, this is so emotional, where's my hanky?"
"He was a man of honor, discipline, and character." Simmons said.
"It's like he's saying what we're all thinking." Sarge said.
"If he was saying what I'm thinking, he'd be yawning…" Grif said.
"If he was saying what I'm thinking, he'd be sleeping…" Yang said.
"True that." Grif fist bumped Yang.
"But perhaps his greatest accomplishment as a military man…"
"Tell it!" Sarge yelled, interrupting Simmons.
"And a friend…" Simmons said.
"Preach all! Preach all!" Sarge yelled.
"Was developing my considerable skills as a soldier and as a leader." Simmons said.
"What?" Sarge said.
Blake rolled her eyes. "Oh no…"
"I'm loving where this is going." Yang grinned.
"As you all know, Sarge's untimely demise leaves a gap in our command structure." Simmons said. "A gap that is best filled by Sarge's right-hand man, a man that has a vision for the Red team!"
"Sarge, is- is he campaigning for your job at your funeral?" Grif asked. "Classy."
"He sure does have my vote." Yang chuckled.
"The Red army is faced with a difficult choice, the choice of 'who will lead us to glorious victory?'" Simmons quoted. "Let's hope they choose a great candidate, a candidate whose armor is actually a shade of red, Sarge would have wanted it that way. Choose Simmons, it's the only thing Sarge did in life, so don't let his whole existence be in vain! Enclosing somebody died. Vote for me."
"Awesome speech!" Grif said sarcastically.
"Ten outta ten would recommend… not!" Yang said.
"Is this the kind of thing you guys do all day?" Kaikaina asked.
"Pretty much, just run with it, it's the only thing that keeps you from going insane from boredom." Grif said.
"Honestly, I wish there was something more exciting to do around here, but this is still enjoyable to watch." Yang said.
"Yeah… Or we could raid the medical supplies for morphine?" Kaikaina suggested.
"Yeah… wait what?" Grif said.
"She's getting weirder and weirder every time…" Blake whispered.
"Hey, Sister, you're up!" Simmons said to Kaikaina.
"Awesome!" Kaikaina went up to the non-existent stage, and is about to give out her speech.
"Ooh, ooh, ooh, can I go again?" Grif asked. "I just thought up a swear word that rhymes with Kentucky!"
"Can I go next after her?" Yang asked. "I also got a speech that'll make Sarge cry out a river… maybe even a waterfall if I'm lucky!"
"Couldn't even wait for me to be buried, could you?" Sarge said in annoyance.
"Your death is in the past Sarge, and we need to look to the future, a future filled with Simmons." Simmons said.
"Hey, everybody… um… I'm new here and I didn't know Sergent very well but… he was really old, and that's gross." Kaikaina said in disgust.
Grif snickered. "Ha ha, I wrote that line."
"You my good man, are a comical genius." Yang complimented Grif.
"Grif, let other people have the spotlight for once!" Simmons said.
"Anyway, when you're old and gross, you're probably going to die and that's kind of sad, but when you think about it, all your friends are probably dead too." Kaikaina explained. "And if they're not. Then they're definitely old and knowing old people is even sadder than being dead, so, anyway… whatever peace out."
"Well, that's one way to roast the elderly." Yang smirked.
"Please tell me this nonsense is finally over." Blake said, not wanting to deal with this anymore.
"This is a miserable excuse for a ceremony!" Sarge exclaimed. "Where's the flag folding? Where's the 21-gun salute?"
"Sir, the flag is an important part of our inventory, we can't just go around having impromptu foldings because we feel like it." Simmons explained.
"And yet, you guys were able to host a fake funeral without any problems?" Blake questioned.
"This is different, we're here to say our farewells to Sarge so I can get that promoti- I mean to honor my memory of my former commanding officer." Simmons said, almost revealing his true intentions.
"And I was in charge of the 21-gun salute." Grif said. "Unfortunately, we don't have 21 guns, so you'll have to settle for what I call the 'double bun' salute, starts in just a few moments."
"Ugh, I think I'm gonna be sick just thinking about it." Yang commented.
"You just didn't want to bring the guns, do you?" Blake asked.
"Eh, can you really blame me for trying?" Grif lazily said.
"Okay, before we start burying Sarge, it's time for Yang to take the stage." Simmons said.
"Yang don't…" Blake said.
"Relax Blake, I won't go too far with what I'm about to say." Yang reassured, she went up to the 'stage' and prepared her speech.
"My good fellow Reds, it is a sad day for our team, as our sergeant… what's his name?" Yang asked.
"It's Sarge." Sarge responded to Yang's question.
"Yeah, that's your rank, I meant what's your na-"
"I just told you! Are you slow or somethin'?" Sarge asked in a rude manner.
"You're lucky we're gonna bury you otherwise you'd be missing more than just an arm." Yang mumbled in annoyance. "So, wait, you're their sergeant, but your name is Sarge?"
"It gets less confusing the less you think about it." Simmons said. "He's our sergeant who just so happens to be named Sarge."
"Yeah, isn't that a huge fucking coincidence." Grif said sarcastically.
"Why am I not surprised?" Blake said.
"Well like I was saying, it's a sad day for Red team." Yang continued with her speech. "Sarge was truly the best damn leader a soldier can ask for."
"You're darn right tootin!" Sarge cried.
"He was someone who would always lift up that magnificent shot gun of his, and would go around aiming at his enemies, just for being blue!" Yang said.
"My shotgun is my pride and joy as a soldier!" Sarge yelled. "It's the only thing that represents who I am in the act of battle!"
"And since he's no longer with us, I would always find him to be one crazy son of a gun, literally!" Yang said. "The moment he pointed his shotgun on us when we first met, I was this close to breaking his kneecaps and destroy him permanently."
"You were gonna do what now?" Sarge said.
"Dammit Yang…" Blake muttered.
"If he really does love his shotgun so much, then why doesn't he go marry it?" Yang questioned.
Grif snickered. "Heh, heh, yeah, why doesn't he marry his shotgun? That thing is worth jack shit every time he tries to shoot at someone from far away."
"Shut up numbnuts." Sarge growled.
"If he was still with us today, I would totally win a fight against him, he be begging and crying for his dear life, with his final words being 'Oh, Yang, please don't hurt me! You were right, women are more superior to be in the army than a weak guy like me! I'm just a scrawny old man, who breaks his back every time I get up off my rocking chair!'" Yang mocked Sarge.
"Hah! I can see that totally happening!" Grif said.
"Like I said, old people are gross, they're not even fun to hang out with in bed." Kaikaina pointed out.
"Yeah… wait what?" Simmons said.
Blake slowly stepped away from being close to Kaikaina.
"And that is all I have to say to our friend Sarge, may he rest in peace in military heaven." Yang said, she walked up next to Blake. "Did pretty good if I say so myself!"
"That might be the worst eulogy speech of all time!" Sarge yelled. "I'm the best goddamn manly leader Red team has to offer! I would never say something so… girlie!"
"I can't believe you actually said all of that." Blake said to Yang.
"You can't have a comedy club without your host Yang!" Yang smirked.
"Ok, Blake it's your turn." Simmons said.
"What!?" Blake exclaimed. "But I don't even know Sarge all that well, we only just met him recently!"
"You'll be fine, you know him longer than Kaikaina did, what's the worst that can happen?" Yang said.
"That's not the problem!" Blake replied.
"Alright, Blake we don't have all day, we gotta start burying him soon, so go up there and give it your all!" Simmons said.
"But-"
"You heard the man, get on up there!" Yang said, as she slowly starts pushing her friend to the imaginary stage.
Blake sighed. "You're the worst… Hello… um… my name is Blake… and… I…"
"Boo! Why are you taking so long? Get it over with already!" Grif yelled.
"Okay you know what? Screw this!" Blake yelled. "I can't take this anymore! I'm not giving a speech to someone who isn't dead!"
"It's ok there Blake, you don't have to lie, my fate is already decided anyway…" Sarge said, looking at the ground.
"But that's the thing, you're not dead, you're still here, standing and talking to us right now!" Blake pointed out.
"Time's up Blake! It's time to commence the burial for the deceased." Simmons rushed, not wanting to lose his opportunity.
Sarge sighed. "I'll just get in my grave now…"
"Yeah, that's maybe for the best sir." Simmons said.
"Oh wow, he's actually going to do it." Yang was surprised.
"What did you expect?" Grif asked.
"Sarge don't." Blake said.
"No can do, Command says I'm dead, so I have to be, Command have never been wrong before." Sarge stated.
"I don't know anything about Command, but maybe they are wrong, especially something this foolish! Blake yelled. "You're not dead! They're probably talking about someone else! And you're going to waste your life over something this ridiculous!"
"Yikes, Blake, maybe you should take a deep breath for a moment." Yang insisted.
"Yeah, you're even starting to scare me." Grif said.
"I'm sorry Blake, it's about time to put this soldier in under the dirt, and there's nothing anyone can do to ruin the mo-"
*THWACKED*
Sarge was then struck by Blake's sheathed katana on the back of his head, as a result, he collapsed onto the ground unconscious.
"Herk! Ble-ag!" Sarge muttered, before he got knocked out.
The Blue team are all outside of their base, they're currently looking at Tucker's newborn alien for a few minutes, not knowing what to do next.
"It's so small and cute!" Ruby squealed.
Weiss shook her head. "Everytime I look at it, I just can't describe on how gross it looks."
"So, this is it, Tucker! This is your little monstrosity!" Church said. "Your little abomination of nature."
"Uh, what do I do?" Tucker asked.
"Why are you asking me?" Church replied.
"I don't know how to be a dad! This isn't the way I planned it!" Tucker yelled.
"Wow Tucker, I had no idea you wanted to become a father." Ruby said.
"No, no! I mean I always wanted to have that ideal father-son relationship. You know, where I see him for like eight hours every other weekend and send checks to woman I hate." Tucker explained.
"That's your take on being a parent?" Weiss questioned. "By being a divorced father figure?"
"Yeah, that's how I see myself anyway, I'm a lover not a father, I don't know how to handle something like this!" Tucker said.
"It's emotional conversations like this that make me miss my mom…" Caboose said.
"It's always nice to talk about how much we appreciate our family from time to time." Ruby commented.
"I guess so Ruby…" Weiss said hesitantly, not wanting to remember her family's problems.
"All right, look, let's leave these two alone." Church said. "Let them do a little bonding."
"Hey, don't leave me here with him! What am I supposed to say?" Tucker asked.
"Have you given him a name yet?" Ruby asked. "How about calling him… Zwei the 2nd?"
"Ruby… it's not a dog…" Weiss stated.
"Well, I think it's an adorable name!" Ruby said. "What about… greeny? Because of his color?" Weiss facepalmed in response.
"I think we'll put the name callings on hold for now…" Tucker said.
"Ask him if he likes baseball." Caboose suggested.
"It's an alien baby, Caboose." Church pointed out.
"Ask him if he likes tee-ball!" Caboose suggested something different.
"Alien, Caboose." Church replied. "Alien was the key word in that sentence."
"Seriously, don't go!" Tucker pleaded. "I don't know even where to start!"
"Tucker, he's part of an alien race whose only purpose seems to tell huge, grandiose lies to people, so they can seduce them and impregnate them." Church pointed out. "So… why don't you start with that? You know… common ground…"
Weiss is disgusted with what Church had just said to Tucker, while Ruby was just confused at what the Blue team are talking about.
"Yeah, I think I'll just stick to baseball." Tucker replied.
"Tell him about how his dad got to third base with you!" Caboose suggested, yet again.
"CABOOSE!" Church shouted.
"I know we only just got here, but I'm starting to regret joining Blue team with you Ruby…" Weiss said.
"No need to be so uptight Weiss." Ruby replied. "I'm pretty sure the other two are doing something important with Red team, while we help Blue team."
Back at Red base, everyone was shocked to witness at what just happened. They saw Blake holding some sort of katana weapon in her hands, the very same weapon that knocked out their leader Sarge, who was still lying on the ground unconscious near the grave he was about to be buried in.
"Sarge…? SARGE…!?" Simmons shouted, shocked at what just happened.
"Holy Shit! Di-Did you killed him!?" Grif exclaimed.
"I-I'm… I didn't mean… I didn't want to hurt him." Blake said.
"You didn't mean to attack Sarge?" Simmons asked. "Well, you sure fooled me."
"I panicked ok!" Blake yelled. "He was about to get himself killed over something stupid!"
"We were going to bury him six feet underground anyway." Simmons replied. "He has a ton of oxygen left in his suit; he would've been fine."
"That's not what I meant!" Blake corrected. "You were going to let someone die, why are you all acting so nonchalantly about this!?"
"I didn't really feel like having to deal with more of Sarge's bossiness, so I say we did a pretty ok job with almost getting rid of him." Grif said.
"I was just… doing what he asks." Simmons lied. "If he commands me to bury him, then I do it for legitimate and selfless reasons!"
"And I just got here sooooo… yeah…" Kaikaina added.
"You guys are a bunch of idiots…" Blake shook her head.
"Guys, will ya just relax for a second?" Yang asked. "I'm going to call Ruby and Weiss about this, so how about you try to move his body somewhere else?" Yang left, and went inside Red base to call the other two members of her team.
"Where should we move him?" Blake asked.
"I mean there's always the hole we dug up from earlier." Grif suggested.
"No, we didn't dug up the hole." Simmons clarified. "I was the one who actually used the shovel, you and Sister only pretended to help and made a bunch of digging noises with your mouths!"
"You know that trick?" Grif asked his sister.
"I learned from the best!" Kaikaina replied.
"We're not putting him in the hole!" Blake yelled. "Let's just move him back to your Red base."
"Before we do that, there's something I gotta do as your new commander, and that's by teaching you three a little discipline, and we're gonna start by running around the base!" Simmons commanded. "Sister, Blake, you two can do girly laps."
"What!?" Blake exclaimed. "Why me!? What did I do?"
"I mean Grif and Sister were already bad enough, but if I want to have the best chances of survival as the new leader for Red team, I think it would be best to reprimand you as well! Since you were the one who knocked out Sarge on purpose." Simmons explained.
"You mean after Sarge wakes up right?" Grif asked.
"No, I mean right now Grif!" Simmons said, as he is now holding Sarge's shotgun.
"Woah! What do you think you're doing with his weapon?" Blake yelled.
"What are girly laps?" Kaikaina asked.
"Hey Simmons? I don't think Sarge is gonna like you picking up his shotgun." Grif said, Simmons cocked Sarge's shotgun in response. "And I really don't think he's going to like you threatening me with it… Well ok, he might like that part."
"As the new leader, what I say goes!" Simmons stated. "So, everyone needs to start running right now!"
"You're crazy!" Blake shouted. "I'm not going to follow your commands just because you're threatening me with his gun!"
"Oh please…" Simmons replied. "You're just a teenager, what do you know anything about obeying orders? When someone ask you to do something, you do it right away!"
Blake frowns at Simmons response, she thought of someone who she thought she could've trust in the past, but instead the outcome of everything they've done would've led to something more heart breaking, due to how many times he tried to steer her in the wrong direction.
"But what about Sarge? He's still here, just unconscious." Grif pointed out.
"Sarge is not here right now, and as long as he's not awake for the time being, that means I'm in charge of this team!" Simmons stated. "And besides Command thinks he died of… what'd he died of?"
"Aspirin overdose." Kaikaina answered.
"See? They think Sarge is dead of a… an aspirin overdose? Really?" Simmons asked.
"I know! I didn't think it was possible!" Kaikaina replied. "And trust me, I've tried."
"Yeah! Wait… what?" Simmons said.
"Simmons, I don't know why you're doing this, but this has got to stop!" Blake insisted. "You can't just be in charge of being the leader of your team just because you can!"
"What difference does it make?" Simmons asked. "I'm the leader! Me! And being a leader means you have to make tough decisions! Like, just for talking back, you two can't do girly laps!"
"You have gone blind with imaginary powers, Simmons!" Grif yelled.
"Oh, ho, ho! On the contrary, I think I've gone blind with very real power!" Simmons said.
"Seriously! What the fuck are girly laps?" Kaikaina shouted.
"The three of you! Shut Up!" Simmons demanded. "You're running! Oof!" Simmons was then shoved into the ground by Yang, making him let go of the shotgun.
"Sorry dude, can't let ya have this." Yang said, she took away the shotgun Simmons was holding.
"Yang, that was pretty badass of you, not gonna lie." Grif complimented.
"Thanks for that Yang." Blake said.
"Ugh, Yang!?" Simmons exclaimed. "I thought you were on a phone call with Ruby and Weiss?"
"I was." Yang replied. "But it turns out, when I use my scroll, it just turned static for no reason, and I can't figure out why."
"You're what?" Simmons asked.
"Our scrolls." Yang repeated. "Just think of it as another type of phone, and now what are you doing holding a gun right up to my friend's face?"
"Ahh, I'm sorry! I won't do it again! Please don't hurt me!" Simmons pleaded.
"Wow, and here I thought you were actually threatening." Blake rolled her eyes.
"Did you really think he had it in him?" Grif asked.
"Buddy, you have two options, either help us out by not pretending to be leader of your sergeant, or get a brutal beatdown by yours truly!" Yang cracked her knuckles.
"Fine…" Simmons got off the ground. "I'll call Red Command for confirmation to clear things up."
"Why are you calling Red Command?" Kaikaina asked.
"FOR CON-FIR-MAT-ION." Simmons emphasized. "Stop asking questions!"
"You keep talking about them! Why don't you call our guys?" Kaikaina suggested.
"Our guys?" Grif said.
"Yeah! The Blue Guys!" Kaikaina stated.
"The Blue guys?" Yang questioned.
"Excuse me? The wha-za-wha? Simmons said in confusion.
"The Blue guys! The guys that sent me here! In the big ship!" Kaikaina repeated.
"Something tells me we picked her up by mistake." Yang said.
"Grif?" Blake said. "She's your sister, care to explain why's she talking about Blue team if we're in Red team?"
"Uh, yeah, this might be a bad time to bring up the fact that my sister is colorblind…" Grif said.
"WHAT!?" Simmons exclaimed.
Blake raised her eyebrow. "She's colorblind? Why didn't you mention this before?"
"I didn't think it would be all that important." Grif replied.
"You didn't think it would be important? Both of your teams are colors of Red and Blue!" Yang pointed out.
"You know, now that you've mention it, that does sound pretty important." Grif replied.
"I don't get it! What's the gray guy so upset about?" Kaikaina asked.
"But girls can't be colorblind!" Simmons shouted.
"Hey! That's sexist!" Yang yelled.
"Ahh, sorry! Please don't hurt me again!" Simmons pleaded, as he took a step back to avoid Yang.
"Yeah! They also say girls can't ejaculate either! But guess what?" Kaikaina said.
"Yeah! Wait what?" Grif said.
Yang tries her best not to laugh. "I want to say something here, but… pfffttt… it would just be plain terrible…"
After hearing what Kaikaina just said out loud, Blake covers her nose, as it started to bleed for some reason. "She's going to be the death of me…" Blake mumbled.
"Oh my God! What's wrong with you!? Why didn't you tell us you were a Blue?" Simmons asked Kaikaina.
"Because-"
"And don't say 'because nobody asked'." Simmons mimicked a high-pitched voice.
"But nobody did ask!" Kaikaina replied.
"She kind of does have a point you know?" Yang said.
"Shut up, augh, God damn it!" Simmons groaned.
"So, what if she is a Blue?" Grif asked. "We'll still keep her."
"We can't do that, she's on the other team, she'll kill us in our sleep if we keep her!" Simmons said.
"Do I get to do that?" Kaikaina asked. "That would be Awesome!"
"No, it's not awesome!" Blake retorted.
"No, she wouldn't." Grif replied. "Besides, she's colorblind, we'll just tell her we're Blues."
"Uh, hello? We already told her we're Red idiot." Simmons reminded Grif.
"Yeah? Well, she's fucking dumb, too!" Grif yelled.
Yang raised her eyebrow. "Grif, I know you and your sister Kaikaina aren't all that family friendly, but isn't that going too far?"
"No, I'm being fucking serious watch." Grif said. "Hey, we're Blue now."
"Whoo hoo! Go Blue! Let's Win!" Kaikaina cheered.
"See?" Grif said.
"Oh my god, she really is as dumb as a rock." Yang commented.
"Oh please, she'll figure it out." Simmons remarked.
"No, she won't." Grif reassured. "In high school, she got kicked off the cheerleading squad three times for rooting for the wrong team."
"That's incredible…" Blake shook her head.
"No, she can't stay!" Simmons repeated. "I know, we'll tell the Blues that we took her prisoner! Maybe we can get something out of this mess."
"No way, we can't send her over there! They'll kill her!" Grif replied.
"Why would they kill her Grif?" Simmons questioned. "She's Blue, it's not like the Blue team goes around killing its own members."
"Somehow I really doubt that." Blake said.
"Oh, right, because she's a Blue… And if she's over there… Then the only people that would be trying to kill her… would be us." Grif said.
"Exactly!" Simmons said.
"Uh, what are you two going with this…?" Yang asked.
"And that means she'd be safe, because, we're like the shittiest team ever." Grif said.
"I really don't follow what you guys are talking about." Blake said.
"Well, I don't know about that." Simmons doubted. "As our new leader, I have some pretty bold plans to-"
"For the last time, you're not the leader!" Blake pointed out. "Sarge is unconscious, and this whole mess was just some misunderstanding."
"And aren't you the guy who tried to bury your leader?" Yang asked.
"Hey, you all helped! We're in this together!" Simmons replied.
"No, Blake just knocked out Sarge to prevent him from getting buried in the hole you dug up, Yang was the one who made me laugh during her speech, and I made digging noises with my mouth, remember?" Grif retorted.
"Oh God!" Simmons realized. "I'll bring his body to Red base right away!"
"Hey Simmons!" Yang yelled, causing Simmons to stop in his place. "Before you go, can you take a look at our scrolls? It's been on the fritz ever since we've been brought here."
"Uh, sure thing." Simmons grabbed both Yang's and Blake's scrolls, and then sets off to take care of Sarge's body in Red base.
"Alright, now that he's gone, you're both are going to help me get my sister outta here!" Grif said.
"What? Why?" Yang asked.
"Because as long as my sister is at Blue base, I won't have to worry about her getting herself into something dangerous." Grif explained. "Ok, you're a Blue."
"Touchdown! Whoo hoo! Go Blue!" Kaikaina cheered.
"No, I mean we're Red, but you're Blue." Grif clarified. "That means you've got to get out of here before Simmons wakes up Sarge."
"I love waking people up!" Kaikaina said. "I wanna help!"
"Wait what?" Blake said.
Yang sighed. "This might take a while…"
"No, you're leaving!" Grif stated.
"Where are we going?" Kaikaina asked.
"The other base." Grif replied.
"The Red base?"
"No, the Blue base."
"We have two bases? Awesome!" Kaikaina yelled.
"MOVE!" Grif shouted.
Kaikaina left to go to the Blue base, Yang and Blake were stunned by Grif's having some affection and care for his sister, despite the fact he would constantly argue and insult her to no end.
"Man Grif, I didn't think you had it in ya!" Yang said.
"I always thought you were some heartless, lazy, moron." Blake said.
"Appreciate the compliment." Grif replied. "Even if she can be an annoying stupid asshole at times, she's still my sister, and I gotta keep her safe, now are you two are going to help me? Or what?" Grif asked.
Yang and Blake look at each other for a couple of seconds, thinking on whether they should go with him or not, after being surprised that Grif actually have some sense of family affection for his sister, they then look back at Grif to give him their final answer.
"Sure, we'll help ya!" Yang said.
The Blue team are now currently outside of their base, Tucker is walking towards them and he looks like he has something he want to say to his team.
"Hey, have you guys seen Doc?" Tucker asked. "I need him to babysit for a while."
"Yeah, I got him talking to Shelia." Church replied. "She's been acting real wacky lately."
"Oh yeah? You mean weirder than your average talking tank?" Tucker remarked.
"Don't be snarky." Church said.
"Sorry dude, it's the hormones, I just had a baby." Tucker apologized.
"Yeah, Shelia's been acting kind of distant and weird, plus she's been saying these random threatening things, kind of reminds me of somebody else." Church said.
"So why is Doc talking to her? And where the hell are Ruby and Weiss at?" Tucker questioned.
"What? You didn't hear the 'threatening' part I just said? I'm not going over there." Church replied. "And besides I thought it be best if Ruby and Weiss can talk to Shelia because… let's be honest they're the less annoying people I had to deal with all day, and they want to do something to help us, so I'm sure they'll be fine."
"Why not send Caboose? Aren't they like, in love or something?" Tucker asked.
"Dude, I've had about all the cross-species babies that I can take for a while, the last thing I need is a junior Caboose running around with a 130mm cannon for a head!" Church explained. "Your little devil spawn is enough for me!"
"Don't talk about my kid like that!" Tucker yelled.
"What's your deal?" Church asked.
"I dunno, I think I'm kind of getting into the whole parenting thing! I caught myself looking at mini vans the other day. Eugh!" Tucker gagged in disgust.
"Of course, you are! That's why you need a babysitter for a newborn, I'll be sure to nominate you for dad of the year." Church said sarcastically.
"Don't judge me." Tucker remarked.
"Anyway, Doc's is going to find out what's wrong with her and give her a little tune up, while Ruby and Weiss are going to try talking to Shelia, so she can calm down a little." Church explained.
"But Doc's not a mechanic, he's a doctor… not a doctor, a medic… well, I guess he's not really a medic either, because he never really helped anyone. He's just some annoying guy that we know… who wears purple armor… who's annoying!" Tucker said. "Ruby is just some sweet innocent girl who look like she could never hurt a fly, and Weiss is… well… she kicked me in the nuts and called me disgusting, I'll give you that much… The point is Doc's not a mechanic!"
"I know, I figure Doc's mechanic skills are probably about as bad as his first aid skills." Church commented. "He's either gonna fix her by accident, or make her completely inoperable, and then I can go down there and find out what's really going on. Ruby and Weiss are capable of handling themselves, as long as they don't annoy the tank to the point Shelia would hurt them, but I doubt that'll happen because they're capable enough to understand basic commands and not do anything reckless, unlike most idiots I know here. Either way, I win… Oh, Doc might also get blown up by her, that's also good."
"Hey how can the tank talk? Why's she called Shelia? Can she do anything cool? How good is she in battle? Have you ever tried using her? Can you use her? Is she good at blowing things up? How big are the explosions?" Ruby questioned, causing Weiss to rub her temple.
The other three are next to the tank, they're trying to find some ways to figure out how to calm her down, but Shelia is getting annoyed by the amount of questions Ruby kept asking her out of curiosity. She slowly points her cannon at Ruby, before they have anytime to react, Doc was the one to speak to the Blue team's tank.
"Shelia, we shouldn't be shooting our teammates, Ruby can you please tone down the questions?" Doc asked. "You're making her anxious."
"Oh, right, sorry it's just, I have never met a talking tank before in my life, so I figured it would be cool to interact with one!" Ruby replied.
"Ruby, I know you're excited, but what were you thinking getting us involve in helping Blue team with their tank problem!" Weiss yelled.
"I thought it be best if we could help out around here. Because I think having our team helping out both Red and Blue team would in return help us get back to Beacon Academy, or Vale!" Ruby explained.
"There's a lot of times where I doubt your leadership skills, but this might be your worst decision yet!" Weiss pointed out.
"How bad can it be! I want to support them both, so that way there's no need for any dramatic conflict or battle between the two teams." Ruby replied.
"Well, I think it's a bad idea, you are about to put us in danger to a loose cannon, and I meant that literally." Weiss said, while pointing at Shelia.
Shelia did not like how Weiss is putting her in a bad spotlight, she points her barrel at Weiss, worrying her in the process. "Woah there Shelia, let's not do anything hasty. Weiss you gotta be careful with what you say around her." Doc said.
"S-s-sorry." Weiss said, a bit shaken at the tank almost firing her.
"Let's try some deep breathing!" Doc recommended. "*Inhale* In through the air filter, *Exhale* Out through the manifold, *Inhale* In through the air filter, *Exhale* Out through the manifold.
Doc continued to teach Shelia some deep breathing exercises, but this apparently caused Shelia to get more annoyed, she then points her cannon once again, this time at Doc.
"Uh, Doc…? I don't think it's working." Ruby said.
"Teaching deep breathing exercises to her never would've work out in the first place, it's a tank!" Weiss exclaimed.
"Uhhh, ok, why don't we try some aversion therapy?" Doc asked. "Think about something that makes you really angry that isn't me." Shelia points her barrel to Ruby, she took a few steps back in response. "Or Ruby…" Shelia points her barrel to Weiss, she widened her eyes, and was about to prepare herself on using her weapon on her. "Or Weiss…"
"Sure." Shelia replied.
The Blue team are observing Shelia and the others from a distance, Church has his sniper rifle to view on what's going on with their tank, they noticed that Shelia is aiming her cannon right at them from a far.
"Uhhhh, yeahhhhh… I don't feel as good about my plan as I used to…" Church said.
"Hey Blues!" They all turned in the direction of where the voice was coming from, and what they saw are Grif, Kaikaina, Yang, and Blake all together, and are about to proposed something to them.
"Aw, crap, here we go… They must've figured how fucked up our team is right now." Church thought, he used his sniper rifle and focus on one of their newest members of their group, which just so happens to be Kaikaina. "Aw, shit, they even brought their new guy-"
"Girl!" Tucker corrected.
"Whatever!" Church yelled. "Just play along, act like our team is ok, and we've got everything under control."
"Please, I've been putting on that act for like… three years now." Tucker replied.
"What do you want Red!?" Church shouted.
"I've got a prisoner for you!" Grif yelled.
"What'd he say?" Church asked.
"Says he has a prisoner for us." Tucker replied.
"Oh what, they're giving us prisoners now?" Church questioned. "Dude, that sounds like bullshit, I smell a trap."
"The Reds aren't that smart, but I dunno anything about Ruby's other friends." Tucker pointed out.
"Ok, normally I agree with that, but this is the orange one, he's pretty crafty, he's a lot like me." Church said. "And I don't know anything about Blake or Yang to trust them well enough yet, so we have to be extremely careful."
"Like you? Shit! Then do I have time to put in my earplugs and hide all out food?" Tucker asked sarcastically.
"Up yours, dickhead!" Church muttered. "Why would they want to give us one of their guys? And why are the other girls helping them with their trap?"
"Why're you asking me?" Tucker asked.
"Oh, right… Why are you giving us one of your guys as a prisoner!?" Church asked.
"She's one of your guys!" Grif shouted.
"Yeah, we accidentally picked her up by mistake, she belongs with your group!" Yang yelled.
"What's taking them so long? Don't they want more soldiers for their team?" Blake asked.
"Yeah, what's their deal? Why aren't they going for this?" Grif questioned. "We have to hurry; I've got to get back before Simmons wakes up Sarge."
"I don't know what's going on with Blue team, but we got to speed this up. Simmons may have already fixed up our scrolls by now." Yang said.
"Uhh, I don't buy this, what do you want for her!?" Church yelled.
"Umm… Nothing! It was- it was an honest mistake! Uh, you can have her back now! No harm, no foul! Look can we hurry this up?" Grif replied.
"Yeah, this is bullshit." Church thought.
"Ask for something else." Tucker said.
"Uhh, we want something else!" Church shouted.
"What!?" Grif exclaimed. "I'm releasing a hostage; you don't negotiate UP from there!"
"This is going nowhere…" Blake sighed. "We're being honest here! She meant to join your team, not ours, it was a misunderstanding, what's keeping you from having her join your group!?"
"Got any money instead?" Tucker asked.
"Fuck you dude!" Grif shouted.
"So, what now?" Yang asked. "The Blue team don't seem to be the kind of 'hostage takey' type."
"I got this." Grif decides to talk to his sister. "Get going, call me if you have any problems, and don't go near any Reds from now on. I'll try to keep the team distracted, so they can't attack you. Whatever you do, don't embarrass the family! Think of mom!"
"Don't do me any favors, bitch." Kaikaina replied, she then left to go to the Blue team.
"She could've at least appreciated you for what you've done, you seemed like you actually cared for her safety." Blake said.
"Yeah, it's ok, it's just her way of saying thanks." Grif replied. "We never really see eye to eye all that much, but in the end she's family, and I just want what's best for her."
"That's really inspirational Grif, pretty nice of ya to be looking out for your sister. Yang said, thinking about the times she tried to raise her sister Ruby all by herself most of the time, when she was younger.
"Alright, no need to keep on repeating it." Grif said.
"What else was on the ship?" Church asked.
"What do you mean!?" Grif exclaimed.
"Yeah, like guns or weapons…"
"Or snacks!" Tucker yelled. "Dude, I'm just asking cause I know you wanted to."
"Nope! Just the girl! Sorry, there weren't any more aliens for you guys to fuck!" Grif yelled.
"They did what!?" Blake exclaimed.
"Whaddya just say!?" Yang exclaimed as well.
"You don't want to know…" Grif said.
"That's okay, we can still fuck this one!" Tucker said, as Kaikaina walked towards them.
"Whoo hoo!" Kaikaina cheered.
"Goddamn it! Never mind, just send her back!" Grif shouted.
"No takebacks!" Church said quickly.
"Aww, what the fuck!?" Grif whined.
"Somehow I knew that was going to happen." Blake said.
"Sorry dude, must've been rough." Yang said, as she patted Grif on his back.
"Ugh, it's fine, the important thing is, she's safe, although I might have to kill the guy in the aqua marine armor." Grif said.
"You mean the guy in teal armor?" Blake asked.
"Yes him…"
"Guys!" They all turned around to see Simmons running up towards them. "Sarge is finally awake, I explained everything to him. Now normally he would be here holding his shotgun ready to shoot Grif behind him thinking he'd gone rouge, but I corrected him, saying it was Blake who knocked him out, so he decided to rest for now."
"Tell him that I said sorry, I didn't mean to knock him out." Blake said.
"Will do… also here's your scrolls they should be working." Simmons handed out both Yang and Blake's scrolls, and they see that the static is finally gone.
"Nice going Simmons, what actually happened to our scrolls?" Yang asked.
"Well, it turns out your phones technology was really hard to fix, it was like something out of star trek, where did you even get something like that?" Simmons asked.
"A lot of students get their scrolls when they enroll for Beacon Academy." Blake explained.
"Beacon academy you say? I might visit that place one day, so like I was saying, your scrolls were damaged for some reason, and I also added our radio frequency to your contacts, so you have the option to call us anytime." Simmons explained.
"Oh really? Sweet! Thanks for that Simmons!" Yang said.
"Anytime."
"Why were our scrolls damaged in the first place anyway?" Yang questioned.
"Maybe it had something to do with that book Ruby tried to open." Blake guessed.
"You two keep talking about this book nonsense." Grif said.
"I know you don't believe us, but that what actually happened." Blake replied.
"Yeah, we were brought here by mistake, maybe the book did teleport us here or something… I don't know." Yang said.
"Hey what are you doing out here in the middle of the canyon?" Simmons asked.
"Oh, you know… just finding something interesting to do around this boring place…" Yang stretched her arms.
"You know how it is around here…" Grif replied. "So, uh, that Sarge thing's pretty crazy."
"Hey, is that your sister over there with the Blues? What's she doing over there?" Simmons asked, everyone stepped back and ran to the Red base, not wanting to deal with Simmons. "Why are they all high fiving? Are they making a cheerleading pyramid? Whoa, they're really tossing her high into the air, Grif? Yang? Blake? Where'd you all go?"
After getting away from both Red and Blue team, Team RWBY are all together again after dealing with many of their problems, they talk about their progress on getting back to Beacon Academy, while finding some way to not get Red and Blue team involve in any meaningless violence.
"So, any luck so far?" Yang asked.
"I would describe it as a trainwreck if I'm going to be honest." Weiss replied.
"Weiss, I know we didn't do a whole lot to help the Blue team, but we managed to get to know more about them, and we at least tried to calm down their tank Shelia." Ruby pointed out.
"Ruby, Church said that their tank is currently acting dysfunctional right now! We could've been killed if it weren't for Doc!" Weiss said harshly.
"You were what!?" Yang exclaimed.
"It wasn't that much of a big deal." Ruby said. "She didn't fire at us or anything, I just wanted to talk to the tank that's all!"
Weiss sighed. "Sometimes I don't know why I get involve with your shenanigans…"
"Ruby why would you volunteer to help them with something like that!?" Yang exclaimed. "
"It's not my fault ok! I just want to do something; we've haven't been able to do anything except for standing around and talking!" Ruby explained.
"Okay, so maybe Blue team is a bit strange." Yang said. "Kind of glad we decided to go with Red team."
"What did you two do over there?" Ruby asked.
"Oh, it was hilarious, we get to meet Grif's sister Kaikaina, we hosted a fake funeral where Sarge was about to get buried alive, and Blake knocked him out before he went into his grave!" Yang replied nonchantly.
"What!?" Ruby said.
"Blake what were you thinking!" Weiss yelled.
Blake has an embarrassed look on her face. "I just didn't want him to be buried alive! He could've died!"
"Is that why you hosted a fake funeral?" Ruby asked.
"It was… complicated." Yang replied. "Oh yeah, Simmons managed to fixed up mine and Blake's scrolls, it must've been affected by the book you opened Ruby."
"Wait it did?" Weiss said, she took out her scroll, only to realize her screen is nothing but static, she glared at Ruby.
"Heh, heh, sorry about that." Ruby apologized.
"Anyway, we were planning on asking Simmons if he could take a look at your scrolls as well, we don't want to lose contact with each other after all." Blake said.
"I suppose, Ruby let's give them our scrolls." Weiss said, she and Ruby gave out their scrolls to Yang and Blake.
"Great! Now let's get going, we don't want to keep them waiting." Yang said.
They all say their farewells for now, and went off in opposite directions, they don't know if they could ever find a way back to their academy, but they did not lose hope. They'll keep a close eye on the Red team and Blue team, making sure they won't do anything out of the ordinary, but one question remains… whatever happened to that book of theirs?
And that was chapter two! Sorry it was taking so long, making stories on this site can take a long time, that and some personal stuff can get in the way of my life. I know I promised Sonic characters yet again, but next chapter for sure, they will appear, I won't disappoint you.
Looks like Team RWBY are having some tough times with the Red and Blue team, that's what happens when you have a bunch of idiots stranded in the middle of an empty boxed canyon.
Next chapter may take a while, because that one is where we're gonna focus a lot more on the action and fighting from the characters, and a special certain blue animal with his buddies will join in on the fight as well.
Whatever happen to the book of theirs that somehow disappeared during their mission? Well, I won't spoil anything, because I have some interesting plans on making that a big plot twist, like it would be SO BIG! You won't know what hit ya!
Anyway, that's all for now, any form of criticism is welcome, review, comment, favorite, share, and I'll see y'all on the next chapter, bye!
