Chapter 5: Stroke of Luck
In less than 10 minutes, the fishing boat docked at the island harbor of Orange Town. Ignoring their still frightened passengers, Hook stepped off the vessel. "Alright! Operation Figured Redhead is on! Although…" Hook looked around and noticed how barren the docks looked; there wasn't a person nor an animal nearby at all. The only sign of life was a bird way over head, cawing as it flew above the town. "Huh? A port this large should have someone around… Hello!? Where is everyone!?"
"No one's around?" Silk muttered as she followed. "Something about this feels… off."
"Psst! Hey!" Baldy whispered to his allies. "Whadda we do? We can't take these guys!"
"We all know that!" Carrot Top snapped, Silk's express rowing still fresh in his mind. "But if we don't come back having done something, we might as well dig our own graves!"
"Be quiet," Bowl-cut slapped them both before nodding at Silk's back… and Dorado hanging from it. "I gotta idea! That ax there, looks like it's solid gold! We can't fight 'em, but we don't need to. Let's just lead 'em to the boss, and let him handle it."
"Good thinking!" Carrot Top said. "Even if the dame's a monster, they're nothing against Cap'n Buggy!"
"Yeah! Good thinking!" Baldy added. "We bring Cap'n that ax and compass, he'll throw us a parade!" ("Hm? Compass?")
The other two looked at Baldy like he was nuts. "You muttonhead," Bowl-cut shook his head at him. "What would the cap'n want with some dusty old compass?" ("Dusty…?")
Baldy shrugged. "Well, that guy has it right on his person. Maybe it's more important than we thunk."
"This is why I'm brains of this outfit," Bowl-cut rolled his eyes, unaware like the other two of their silently fuming audience. "There ain't nuthin' valuable about some ancient, termite-infested, water-logged, piece of-"
"You ain't that brainy! Iron Pop!" An enraged Hook smacked all three of them with an open iron hand, sending them flying and screaming into the water. Huffing, he turned back to the shore and jumped back onto the docks. "Lousy, little…"
"Hook, over here!" Silk waved Hook over to her. The blonde bruiser stood next to a windowsill with a pie on it.
"Cool, Silk! You found food!" Hook picked up the dessert, ready to eat it whole. "Thank you for the meal!" Right before he bit down, Silk ripped the pie from his hands, leaving him to bite his tongue. "Ow! Thilk, what the hell! Are you that jealouth thomebody made an edible pie!?"
Silk blushed at the stealth barb but moved on quickly from it. "Pay attention, you moron! This pie was just sitting here like somebody was cooling it! What does that tell?"
Hook paused at that, before tapping his chin in thought. "Well… if the dethert wath jutht thitting here, whoever made it wathn't thinking they'd have to leave tho thoon. Whith meanth…"
"They had to leave in a hurry," Silk concluded before a thought occurred to her. "Hey… those morons from before. They said their captain was here in this village?" Their answer came in the form of an explosion; not just any explosion, but one that rattled the teeth when the shockwave of it hit. Both teens looked up to where the bird flying overhead from before had been, only to see the creature falling somewhere deeper in Orange Town. "Whoa! Was that a cannonball? I didn't think they could be that powerful!"
"Motht aren't," Hook pointed out. "I've had enough thot at me to know that mutht. Well, let'th go thee where that landed!"
The pair's musings were interrupted with a cry of "Stop, thief!"
"Ah!" Hook jumped and pointed at Silk. "The touthed it, but we weren't gonna eat it! Honetht!" Instead of an angry baker coming down the road, Hook saw a red-headed girl in a white top with a blue stripe across the midsection, yellow-orange skirt and inch-high sandals running from three burly men brandishing swords. "What the-!? They're thending armed guardth!? All thith for a pie!?"
Nami never believed in fate; it was a concept only children put any stock into. She did, however, believe in luck, even as it seemed to be up and down recently. After successfully sneaking into a Navy base, she was able to crack the safe of the head honcho there. Then she learned that some pirate had beaten her to he punch, stealing what she was about to rightfully steal. And left a letter bragging about the theft! Of all the nerve!
Naturally, this led her to Orange Town, where said ass clown was raining cannonballs on the poor town. ('Pirates. Scum, one and all, every time.') As the pirates partied and pillaged, Nami just stood on the side, waiting for them to all be thoroughly sauced so she could nab the Grand Line Map and book it. The young thief's patience was rewarded; by sundown, every pirate was absolutely hammered. Well, almost all of them…
Which was why Nami was now running for her life from the goobers sent after her. She tried with all her might to think of how to either fight her pursuers or lose them, but finally, the universe brought forth providence. Down the road ahead of her, some hapless idiot was arguing loudly with his girlfriend about something; they didn't look like town natives, so Nami reasoned they were traders who hadn't noticed the town was being occupied by a pirate. Well, usually she tried to avoid wrapping civilians in her heists, but she (absolutely) couldn't die without accomplishing her goals. Here's hoping the cute one with a ponytail wouldn't mourn the ragamuffin she had shacked up with too much…
"Boss! Thanks for meeting me!" First order of business: confuse her pursuers. Even for pirate scum, these guys were bottom of the barrel. Probably sent after her because they were the only ones not hungover enough to give chase. They'd do anything to impress their captain; and if that meant bringing in 'her boss,' instead of capturing some 'thief underling,' they'd do so in a heartbeat. Luckily, all pirates were about at small-minded as cockroaches, so this part of the plan had a 100% success rate. "Thank God you came to save me!"
"Eh? Boss?" The brown-eyed girl looked taken aback, before regarding her fuzzy-looking companion with a raised eyebrow. "I thought you said I was your first?"
'She thinks I'm some ex-lover?' Nami thought with a bit of ego as she ignored anything else said. 'Didn't realize I looked that good today, but I'll take it!'
Second order of business: confuse the patsies, which she was so good at now, she could do it with only two and a half sentences instead of five. Basically, Nami befuddled her targets, either by suddenly catching the blame for what she stole without any context and no way to defend against something they know nothing about, or the girlfriend believed her guy was cheating on her (sometimes it's the guys who think that their girl is the unfaithful one, but it worked either way). This leg of the plan had a slightly smaller window of success, and in the past, Nami had to often get more creative to think her way out of the mess she'd made. (She did used to have someone to help – no, it's not important. She's not important.)
As Nami ran past the pair, she hid behind the blonde girl as both a human shield and a setup to her fail-safe. The knuckleheads caught up, one jabbing a sword at the group. "Hey! You heard her! She led us back to her boss!"
"Must be this guy," one of the other pirates said, looking at Scruffy before his eyes cut over to Nami and her human shield. His eyes never went higher than their chests. "Lucky bastard!"
"Bothth?" Scruffy questioned in a lisp. "Lithen, I think-" The teen cleared his throat before he spat out some blood. "Oh, that's better. Anyway, I think there's been-"
"We've heard enough!" the lead thug snapped, though, Nami noted, the boy seemed unfazed by the aggression, save that he did stop talking. "We're taking you back to our Captain! He'll decide what to do with you little thieves!"
Nami smiled from her hidden hiding spot. 'Okay, this is it! Now, either he'll try and act tough for his girl, or he'll panic and try to offer anything to save his – hmm?'
As Nami quickly realized, Scruffy was doing neither of those things. In fact, he didn't even seem interested in what was technically a mugging at all! He stood there, looking away with apparent boredom on his face. Even the pirates caught on, with the leader snapping at him. "Oi! What are you doing!? We're threatening to kill you, moron!"
"Yeah, but," Scruffy shrugged nonplussed. "Can you?"
"H-huh!? Can we what?"
In an instant, Scruffy's whole demeanor changed; his foot shifted forward, his hands were removed from resting on the back of his head to resting on his hips, and his gaze sharpened to the point he was clearly looking through his muggers. "I mean… do you think you can kill me?" The words sent shivers through Nami and the pirates, as they stood frozen in place with the sheer animosity coming off the teen boy.
As expected, the knuckleheads began to get in each other's faces; the scruffy guy threw out some cas one-liners about the guy's mother, but neither of them was getting into a fight, the redhead noted. That wasn't optimal; her plan hinged on these two as fall guys, and they just weren't being scummy enough to get the pirate scum to take a crack.
Unfortunately, frozen in place wasn't distracted enough for Nami's sake, and she needed to get off this island before that clown sent somebody worth a damn to get her. 'Idiots! Someone attack someone today!' Nami huffed in frustration. 'Guess my luck's 50/50 today, after all…' Which meant she had to break out her last resort – play the heartstrings.
"Hello there!" the chipper blonde's voice came from above Nami as she angled her face down. "Are you alright – hm?" Nami smirked into the fabric of the blonde's shirt, as she hunched over to make herself look as small and scared as possible. Everybody loved a damsel in distress; it was a universal constant. If she couldn't play on their libidos or attractions, she could always play on the foolish need to connect with other people and try to do the right thing.
Now, Ponytail will hold Scruffy accountable and tell him to fight already. Either the boyfriend will try to act all macho, or he'll cut his losses, reveal he was just posturing, and maybe even try to leave his girl behind to these morons in exchange for his own life. The result whichever way the wind blew would be enough of a distraction that the three dunderheads would be trying to figure out what to handle first, allowing for a head start to escape! (It was a great idea when C- no one! It was all her idea and not some no-name backstabbing bitch! Geez, why was she thinking about her so much today?)
"Hey, Hook." The blonde girl spoke up to her beau, Hook apparently, and Nami smiled. 'This is it,' she smiled into Silk's shirt (that is what Hook call her in response). 'Next, she'll tell him to take these guys out for a girl's honor and dignity, and he'll take his ax – weird he'd give it to her to hold on to – and fight to impress her. If he's a coward, he'll keep trying to argue or talk his way out of the fight, and if they don't immediately skewer him-'
"Let me handle this."
'-then these guys will fight about how much of a spineless – WAIT, WHAT!?' "Huh?" Nami had no time to process just what the hell happened as Ponytail walked forward, leaving Nami to stand there in utter confusion as she pulled out the ax of solid gold ('Holy shit! Is it all…!? That much gold, I could-!')-
The redhead pinched herself, focusing her thoughts, before glaring at Hook. In a 180, Hook's dangerous aura had receded as if it wasn't even there. Now, the dope just stood there as he let his girlfriend ('Maybe? Clearly, I read this whole relationship wrong…') stalk toward the burly men who would have no qualms about beating up a woman! Turning a glare to Scruffy, Nami barked, "Hey! Are you just gonna let her fight them alone?"
The whistling asshole just watched the scene without a care in the world as he leaned on the wall of a building before he grinning suddenly enough to stump Nami. "Well, yeah. Why not? If Silk needs help she'll ask for it."
Nami was two seconds from either running from these nutjobs as they get butchered by pirates or smacking some sense into this tactless moron. But then Ponytail smacked the tallest pirate over the next house with her solid gold axe, and she wasn't sure what to do anymore. Neither did the other two, as she proceeded to slam them into the ground like tent stakes. Despite all her opponents being unconscious or, in the case of the first guy, a street over, Ponytail posed and called out, "I am Silk, guardian of Port Cisco, and wielder of the legendary Dorado! If you wish to make its legend greater by your defeat, then come and test me!"
"Alright, alright. Take it down a notch," Hook chuckled as he slapped Silk on the back. "Still, that was pretty awesome! That one guy had some serious air time! Clakakaka!"
Silk looked away bashfully. "I… might have gotten carried away. I was expecting stronger enemies, but…"
"Don't sweat it," Hook waved off her sudden timidness. "We've only just gotten to the island, I'm sure we'll find stronger guys later. But remember our first plan!"
"Right!" Silk nodded, lighting up like a miniature sun. "So, where do we start?"
Nami looked back and forth at the scene, from the pair as they chatted away to the beaten men lying on the ground in defeat. As she took in this unforeseen turn of events, a new plan began to surface in her mind. A plan that, if effective, would make her very rich twice as fast! ('Then, I could really do it… and be free.')
"Wow, blondie! You're pretty strong!" Both blondes turned back to see Nami walking over to them, a charming smile on her face. "I don't know many people that could have done what you just did, but am I glad to have run into someone like you!"
"Gorururu! You're welcome for the assist!" Silk grinned at the praise. "Name's Silk!"
"Yeah, I heard you before you clobbered those idiots," the redhead smiled back, making an OK symbol with her hand. "Name's Nami! An expert in robbing pirates blind! Let's team up!"
"Actually, speaking of teaming up," Hook spoke up. "We're looking for a girl who knows figures. Have you seen anyone who looks smart?"
Silk shook her head at Hook. "I don't think that's what they meant by that…"
"Figures?" Nami blinked at the non sequitur, before looking at Hook with a callous eye. 'Why's this spineless deadbeat talking like he's in charge? After hiding behind someone else…'
"What he means," Silk continued, "is some guys told us of a person who robbed them and left them to sink in a storm."
"Oh, that! All me!" Nami shrugged casually. "I'm also a brilliant navigator, even if I say so myself!"
"Really, it was you?" Hook grinned, suddenly more invested in the conversation. "Well, that was easy!"
"What…" Nami began.
"Here is comes~" Silk grinned as she stepped back to enjoy the show.
Snapping into position, Hook stood with his back to the girls, arm extended with two fingers extended from his closed fist. "Commit this to your memory! Carve it into your brain! This moment is your once-in-a-lifetime chance, Figures Girl!" Pivoting on his heel, he turned on the spot to face forward, pumping his arm up and pointing into the sky. "You're looking at a man too big to ignore! Today, you join forces with… James Hook!"
As Hook stood frozen in place and Silk cheered him on, Nami watched the scene with an expression that screamed she had no clue what was going on. 'Maybe my luck's running a little low today…'
At Drinker's Pub, a crew of cutthroats was walking on eggshells, and not just because many of them were so hungover, the birds' chirping was too loud to stomach.
BANG!
Luckily, their captain was gracious enough to end that issue. Very forcefully, it should be noted. Despite his amusing appearance, Buggy the Clown, one of East Blue's most dangerous criminals, felt anything but jovial today. Dressed in his party wear, which was a striped white and red shirt, white gloves, a green sash for a belt, a pair of loose light-green pants, striped socks, pointy shoes, a purple scarf around his neck, and an orange, fur-lined captain's coat with matching green-fringed bicorne, he sulked in his wooden throne in a way that said 'the first that speaks gets shot.'
As he dropped the smoking pistol onto a nearby table he growled, "I worked too damn hard to steal that map! Some sneaky thief stealing what rightfully belongs to me is inexcusable! Why hasn't she been caught yet!?"
"Frank and the others were sent to grab them, Cap'n," One pirate explained, even as he shivered when Buggy's gaze passed over him. "I-I'm sure they'll be back soon!"
"They'd better!" Buggy snarled. "Or I'll stuff all three of their asses into one cannon and launch them out to sea!" That got more of the crew scared. Nobody wanted to go out like their other crewmates Jessie, James, and that short hairy one with the funny accent. It was funny to hear them cry out they were 'blasting off again,' (although nobody could discern when Buggy did this before, nor why he would have forgiven them and allowed them back onto the crew), but nobody was willing to see it first hand.
The crew's thoughts, and Buggy's fuming, were interrupted by the door to the roof slamming opening. Sopping wet, Bowl-cut, Carrot Top, and Baldy rushed through the entrance and greeted Buggy with a "Hello~!" in three-part harmony.
"Oh, you stooges again," Buggy frowned, only looking at them from the corner of his eye. "I thought a Sea King had eaten you…"
"Never fear, your Terrifyingness!" Bowl-cut said. "Your ever-humbled and most conniving guard are too tough to be killed so easily!"
"We'd sooner die for you than die, sir!" Carrot Top added.
"I'll chew thru the palookas with my own teeth!" Baldy demonstrated by snarling and barking… before Bowl-cut bopped him on the head to quiet him down.
"Dying for me is what you very well will be doing," Buggy aimed the gun at the three, "if you don't produce some gold right now!"
"Ah, well, about that, your Clowniness" Bowl-cut simpered, as he took a step back placing his comrades in front of him. "We got you a bounty of gold, but we were robbed!"
"Yeah!" the redheaded pirate added, spreading his hands apart to convey size. "Big guy! Huge! Muscles the size of islands!"
"Really?" Baldy looked back at his crewmates. "Was that guy hiding behind the broad who sunk us?"
Despite trying to grab and cover Baldy's mouth, the other two knew the jig was up. Their captain rose from his throne, walked toward them… and then past them. As they glanced after him in shock, Buggy nursed his chin as he got lost in thought. "Hmmm… a girl, eh? Can't be a coincidence. And you said she had some monster working for her?"
The three traded looks amazed their bluff had worked. "U-uh, yeah! I mean, yes sir!" Bowl-cut nodded. "A big… blond fella!"
"Yeah!" Baldy through in, catching on for the first time it should be noted. "With an ax, made of solid gold!"
"That's it!" Buggy exclaimed. "She's some bounty hunter, or working with one! I wonder if it's the infamous Roronoa Zoro?"
"If any bounty hunter's here," a new voice spoke up as they entered from the roof door. "Let me have a shot, Cap'n. And if it's just some beast…" The man grinned, clenching his fist with excitement. "It would take no effort to tame it!"
Buggy grew silent for a minute, before throwing his head back and laughing. "Gyahahahahaha! I'd expect nothing less, Mohji! Bring me their heads, any riches you find, and that map!"
"Roger, Cap'n Buggy!" Mohji grabbed a steak, left over from the party, and threw it off the building… where a large set of jaws devoured the morsel in a single gulp. "We'll get right on it!" Mohji jumped off the top of the bar to land on the beast who was as tall as the first floor of it. Once Mohji was settled on the beast, it gave a mighty roar before bounding into the town for its prey.
A/N: And thus, we start the Orange Town Arc proper!
