"DUDE!" Spunk shouted.
Kyler flinched. He held up his hands and said, "Sorry!"
"Look, I was fine with you needing medical leave for the burn, but this will be like the third week without a tattoo artist?" Spunk said.
Empathy didn't correct her that it was more like two and a half weeks. He could feel her frustration building in his chest. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to fuse and-"
"Well, can you unfuse?" Spunk crossed her arms. "Don't you have control over that yet?"
"I, uh-"
Elliot, who had been sitting at their desk, watching silently, spoke up then, "Hey, Spunk, it'll be okay. We'll just do piercings for now."
Spunk ran a hand through her hair and began to pace. She kicked a small trashcan, knocking it over. Kyler flinched. Spunk muttered, "Fuck, Virge."
"I- I can try-?"
"No, don't force anything." Elliot said, holding a hand out to Kyler. They looked at Spunk and said, "It'll be alright. We'll figure it out."
Spunk threw her hands up in the air. "I'll have to hire another artist!"
"That's fine! We've been talking about doing that anyway." Elliot said, raising their voice to match hers. "Look, just let them work through this-"
"I'm really sorry-" Kyler's heart was in his throat, cutting off his words.
Spunk shook her head, walking out of the back room and pacing around the front. Kyler sat down in Virgil's chair and sighed. The seat creaked in protest at his weight. He ran a hand over his neck and tried to push away all the frustration he absorbed. He didn't like feeling this way. He would rather go back to his Sides questioning him about sinful bruises than have his friend mad at him. Kyler felt his throat tighten and he tried to ignore the desire to cry.
"Don't worry about Taylor." Elliot said quietly. Scooting his chair closer to him. "She can have a temper."
"No, I know. I'm sorry." Kyler took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes. "I just- don't want to be a bother."
"I mean, no one does." Elliot said with a shrug. "But right now, you aren't Virgil. We can't expect you to be Virgil. So… just go out and be Kyler."
Kyler glanced out at the front room. "But what about-"
"You let me worry about her." Elliot said with a small smile. "That's the joyfriend job."
"Thank you." Kyler said.
"Now get out of here before she tries to argue again." Elliot said, "Fusion is easy for her pod. They wouldn't get it."
Kyler nodded, giving Elliot a big hug. He left quietly out the back door, feeling shaky and sad and unsure how to stop it.
Working at the daycare was not as exciting as it usually is. Expression kept giving him funny looks. Kyler kept getting the icky feeling he was doing something wrong.
"Hey, I wasn't going to say anything, but…" Expression started. Empathy felt concern grow in his chest. "But you guys worked it out, right?"
"Worked what out?" Kyler asked.
"You know." Expression gestured to him. "The whole Fusion thing. Pat was upset before- before you showed up." Expression sighed and looked over at the kiddos. "I know it's not my business. But it's been a couple days and you're still Kyler."
Kyler looked down at his big hands. He felt his chest getting hot. He didn't know what to say. Pat was upset?
Expression asked, sounding hesitant, "So like. Is this normal for you?"
Normal. Was Kyler normal? He wasn't sure. He stuck around for a while- was that not the "normal" thing to do?
Kyler wanted to say, 'Yes, everything is fine.' But the words got stuck in his throat. So he offered them a tight smile and nodded. The best he could do was, "Mm-hm."
Expression gave him a funny look, but dropped the subject. Kyler didn't like the doubt that festered under his skin. He tried to focus on the kiddos instead of his confusing thoughts.
Kyler had to take a shower. That was fine! He could do that! Afterall it was his body - not Patton's or Virgil's. He could take care of it just like any other Fusion! This was a totally normal thing he could do.
Kyler glanced at himself in the mirror and caught sight of his hickies. He turned away, holding back a shiver. Don't think about the phantom touches. Of lips on his neck, hands on his shoulders. Deceit's spicy cologne- Noooo!
"I can do this." He whispered, closing his eyes. "I got this. Just, don't look at ourselves in the mirror. We can do that."
Kyler turned on the water, watching it for a moment before stepping away to undress. He started with his socks and jacket because those were easiest. His extra arms remained locked around his tummy, so Kyler removed his pants next. He exhaled and focused, slowly unwrapping his arms from their position. His muscles ached with the stretch. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he felt a twinge of worry about the feeling. His arms weren't supposed to be sore like that, right? Maybe Logic had a point about the yoga. Kyler took a moment to stretch his arms. His upper arms easily went through the motions of each stretch. His shoulders burned pleasantly. His lower arms, however, felt like he had just done a thousand push ups. He winced a little as he moved from pulling on one bicep to the other.
That's when he noticed the spiderweb. He gasped, startled for a second. He relaxed once he realized it was a tattoo and not a scary bug or goo or cut- don't think about that.
He held up his right tatted arm. The tattoos were only on his lower biceps, stopping just below his elbows. On the same inner arm, a small skeleton in a suit with a big hat was drawn to be marching. He inspected his arms more. While both arms had the webs, neither had the spiders that used to inhabit them.
It was probably for the best, Kyler decided as he imagined tiny, creepy spiderfeet crawling across his arms. He rubbed them quickly, hoping to shake off the sensations.
He stretched his upper arms above his head and winced at a sudden pain in his back. He dropped his arms and slowly raised them again, getting the same ouchie. He frowned.
What…?
Kyler pulled off his shirt and slowly turned around. He twisted to look over his shoulder to see his reflection in the mirror. At first glance of the pink flesh, Kyler gasped and dropped to the floor. He covered his mouth with his hands. He stared down at the tile, but he couldn't see it; he could only see red. The pain was far worse than cutting a banana. Worse than teeth scraping skin. It was the worst pain Kyler had ever felt. He closed his eyes and breathed through his nose; frantic, heavy puffs of air. He remembered the burning. The crying. The feel of skin peeling away.
"Oh my God-" Kyler hissed, pressing his forehead against the cool tile. He stayed in that position for a few seconds. It didn't matter that it was only a moment, it felt like he was on his knees for hours. He bit his lip as the burning faded.
Kyler opened his eyes. His back ached but not like before. He unfurled, gaining his senses back bit by bit. He stood slowly, still panting. With weak knees he leaned on the counter. His vision cleared and he looked down at his four hands. He cleared his throat and whispered, "We're still together."
He looked up at the shower, steam rising from over the curtain. He held himself, hands grabbing his shoulders, hips, and arms.
He told the air. "I'm still here."
Tell me what you think!
