Chapter 18: Patience

A bit of Kakashi's POV in this chapter.

Intoxicated. The feeling engulfed him when she kissed him, and it still hadn't subsided.

"It's ironic really," he uttered with a wry smile, meeting her bewildered gaze. His hand brushed along her jawline, down the span of her neck, before tracing the slight protrusion of her clavicle bone.

"W-what is?" His eyes slowly traveled the length of her body.

"You're a slip of a girl. And yet, you could make me crawl at your feet if that's what it took to make you mine."

The power she had over him was truly absurd. What was it that made her such an anomaly? He had always expected to be alone, and frankly, he wasn't bothered by it. He never wanted what came with a relationship: vulnerability, intimacy, trust. They weren't things that came easily to him; however, he wanted that with her. Why? She was very beautiful, it was true, but he'd fucked plenty of beautiful women in his life. She was strong, but she hadn't even reached her peak potential yet. It's not as if there weren't stronger kunoichi than her. He supposed what it essentially came down to was her own unique spirit. How she was simultaneously sweet and fierce. A healer, a fighter. So compassionate and so unyielding at the same time. The juxtaposition that was her.

His need to have her completely eclipsed his lust for her. When she asked him to stop, he restrained himself, albeit, with difficulty. He detested being told 'no.' But as frustrating as her rejection was, her willingness was something he needed for her to truly be his.

"You and I both know I don't have that kind of power over you." She said it almost dejectedly.

It was humorous that she thought so. True, he wouldn't accept her dismissal of him. But she was the only person to ever have this amount of control over him.

"If you gave me a chance you'd see it plainly," he offered.

"You know I can't do that Kakashi."

"Why?" Hadn't he showed her he could satisfy every desire she had? That he could be romantic, that he could be considerate, that he could please her?

"You're dangerous."

"I am," he agreed. "But not to you."

He could see she didn't agree with him but remained silent. He was forceful with her, but he had a line. Her submitting to him wasn't negotiable. He already warned her he required it. But it wasn't as if she was the only one who needed to give something. Relationships were about balance, weren't they? He was prepared to give plenty in return; he wouldn't be unfair when it came her.

His weight was the only thing holding her down, so he wasn't particularly surprised when she thrust him off of her. He landed gracefully as she scrambled to her feet.

"I shouldn't have kissed you," she murmured.

"I'm not complaining."

"I'm aware, but I don't want to give you a false impression." She turned away from him as she said it.

"What impression is that?" He flickered behind her, and lightly grabbed the side of her hip. "You want me, do you not?"

A few moments of silence went by before she finally bit out, "I do," she acknowledged. "But I know I shouldn't."

He felt the chakra signature approaching them and refrained from sighing. "My apologies for interrupting sir, but The Hokage has requested to see you." He could hear the fear in the ANBU member's voice as he spoke to him. His back was to the ANBU, so he didn't bother fixing his mask back in place. He wasn't quite ready to leave his Sakura just yet.

"I will be there shortly." He felt the other shinobi's chakra disappear as quickly as it came. "Well, it seems we'll have to continue this another time."

He heard her mutter "good" under her breath and he laughed. "I'm eager to resume where we left off as well."

"No! That's not what I…" She responded in embarrassment, before trailing off as he pressed his lips to her neck. "Kakashi, you know perfectly well that's not what I meant! Get off!"

Oh, he knew, but it was so much more fun to 'misunderstand' her. He couldn't resist planting one final kiss on the top of her head, before slowly pulling away. He watched her attempt to regain her composure as she faced him.

"Don't forget what you agreed to. The next B-mission, right?"

"The next B-mission what?"

He dodged when she swung her fist at him in anger. He had to admit, he did enjoy provoking her. Her temper was quite a sight to behold.

"I'm only teasing Sakura." She visibly deflated at that. "As long as you're willing to follow every order I give you. You know nothing short of that will change my mind," he said seriously.

"Yes, yes! I'll get down on my knees if that's what it takes for you!" He could tell she realized her poor choice of words because she began to flush in embarrassment.

"Well, you do know how much I enjoy that." He stepped forward until her deceptively dainty hands came up to his chest, attempting to keep him at bay.

"Shut up!" She growled at him. "I was only saying…."

"I know what you meant," he interjected. "I'm also fairly certain I'll be conceding to you after this mission."

"Really?"

"Your determination is one of the things I like most about you." She may dislike following his orders. She may find his conduct on high-level missions unpleasant. But she would adhere to what he expected in the field if it meant reaching her goals of growth as a shinobi. And that was exactly what his aim was all along.


She scoffed in disbelief, and his mouth quirked in amusement. "Well, one of many," he amended. He flicked her nose lightly and smiled.

"I'm never going to be what you want Kakashi."

"Why do you keep saying that?"

"Because for some reason you refuse to see it! You think you want me this way, but you don't!"

"I don't?" He pantomimed an expression of shock, and she huffed with impatience at his antics.

She attempted to reinforce her point, "You've already acknowledged how stubborn I am."

"Ah yes, your stubbornness. A blessing and a curse to me, but I suppose I wouldn't have you any other way," he stated with seriousness, forgoing his earlier jesting.

She realized her hands were still resting on his chest and she quickly lowered them. "You look a bit shocked Sakura."

"Of course I am. It doesn't exactly align with your character."

"How so?" He took a step toward her, and she took a small step back in response.

"You like control," she said simply.

"I do."

"You will never control me completely, no matter what you do."

"I'm aware." He was?! She was so thrown off that she didn't even notice him take another step forward. He was close enough to tangle his fingers in her pink strands. He stepped into her, and she was forced to crane her neck to look at him.

"You're MY defiant girl. I don't want to change you as you're suggesting. If I took away what made you Sakura, then what's the point?"

"I don't… you've said… time and time again… you want me to submit to you?" She sputtered out.

"Of course I do, and you will, as you've learned firsthand." He continued to play with her hair.

"How can you not mind my obstinance and demand my submission at the same time?!"

He smirked and used his grip on her hair to harshly tug her head back. "My feelings for you certainly complicate things. I will tame that defiance of yours, but I have no desire to rid you of it entirely."

"But you're… you?"

He chuckled and leaned closer. So close that she could see the rich dark brown color of his beauty mark. "Odd, isn't it?"

She barely drew in a breath before his lips captured hers. His tongue intertwined with her own in the battle of dominance he loved so much – and always won at. His kisses shouldn't cloud her mind to such a degree, but they did. Every delicious bit of pressure, every nibble on her lips, made her body respond. And when she began to reciprocate, she could feel his gratification. He gave her bottom lip one last bite before peppering her throat with kisses. Soft ones that tickled her skin and had her tingling. Harsh ones that would undoubtedly leave marks but had the wetness pooling between her legs. She felt his other hand caress the small of her back, drawing little circles on the skin with the pads of his fingers. His mouth came up from her neck to eagerly kiss her again. She should stop this, stop him, but for some reason she couldn't form the words. It seemed, despite swearing off sake, she could still feel intoxicated. At the moment, reason had abandoned her. It somehow didn't matter who he was, what he was. She was panting embarrassingly against his lips as he took a brief reprieve from kissing her.

She watched him scan her neck with satisfaction. "I like seeing my marks all over you."

"I can just heal them," she managed to retort.

"Gives me more of a reason to mark you up again." He sounded unreasonably seductive as he said it.

She felt his hand wander down to her butt and begin petting her. A pitiful squeak escaped her when he grabbed her cheek roughly in his palm.

"For how petite you are your ass is certainly something else."

"Your 'appreciation' is kind of hard to miss," she muttered snidely.

"Can you blame me?" He laughed.

Thankfully, his hand stopped it's perusal of her backside, and came up to rest on her hip. She peeked up at his face and became unsettled at the intensity she found. It had her wanting to put as much distance between them as possible. But also, somehow, it had her body tingling as well.

"Don't you have to see Tsunade-sama? You shouldn't keep her waiting." She needed him to leave. Her foolish kiss from before to distract him had backfired on her so abysmally. Her tactic had certainly been effective; he was no longer suspicious. She was tempted to laugh dryly at that thought.

He snorted at her words before replying, "oh, of course not. Who am I to keep The Hokage herself waiting?" The mockery in his words wasn't lost on her.


She was free of him… for a few days at least. For once, she wasn't envious of her teammates that got to go on a high-level mission with him. She wasn't fuming over her confinement to the village. This was the first time she had real space from him since he made his feelings for her known.

'Not to mention Itachi,' she mused to herself.

She wouldn't be done healing him by the time Kakashi returned from his mission. Still, that was far better odds than trying to hide what she was doing for an entire week from him. Concealing something of this magnitude from Kakashi was risky… to say the least. He wouldn't be interested in an explanation for why she was helping him. Itachi was an enemy to him, and Kakashi's view on enemies was incredibly rigid. And his reaction if he were to find him in her apartment of all places…

"I take it that wouldn't go over well?"

She realized she must have said that last part aloud. Itachi had shown up the night after Kakashi left. He was at least considerate enough to appear in her living room again. They didn't exactly have a planned time for this, but it was a small comfort he wouldn't drop in on her if she was in the bathroom or something.

She gave him a flat look in response, and he smirked. "Shirt off," she ordered. It was the second time she'd seen him in this state. The visibility of his ribs was an indication of his weight loss. With clothes on, no one facing him would assume he was anything but the epitome of health and power. It was jarring to see him in such a way. This attractive, powerful man almost on the brink of death.

"Could you turn your Sharingan off?" She was nervous with his lethal eyes scrutinizing her every move.

"Why?"

She was taken back by his tone. "All it's doing is draining your chakra anyway. What's the point of keeping it on this entire time as if we're about to engage in battle? I'm healing you, aren't I?"

"I don't turn it off unless I have no choice," he finally said.

"That's absurd." She met his eyes in disbelief. Why would he exhaust himself in such a way? As adept as Kakashi was at the Sharingan's abilities, she knew he couldn't turn it off. He usually kept it covered to mitigate the chakra loss. As an Uchiha, Itachi was more than capable of switching off his bloodline. He was only exacerbating his deteriorating condition by keeping it active all the time.

"It's not doing your health any favors."

"That's why I have you to heal me."

He was deflecting by teasing her. She could tell he wasn't going to do as she asked, nor was he going to tell her why.

"Whatever. Just don't hold it against me if it takes longer than expected to heal you as a result."

"Of course not," he laughed.


"You're staring intently Sakura."

"I was just thinking."

Itachi wasn't nearly as taciturn as his younger brother. Sure, he wasn't spilling his secrets to her, but he was relatively talkative. As she mended the vessels in his lungs, she looked over his face again. He really was in terrible shape, and yet even so… He looked so unbothered by it. Calm. That was the best way to describe him.

"You're so capable, even in this condition," she observed.

"Hm."

"You have to be weakened?"

"Undoubtedly."

Her surprise must have been apparent at his admission because he chuckled.

"Why would I bother refuting it? You probably know better than I now."

"True. I didn't expect the damage to be so great. I honestly can't believe how strong you still are," she confessed begrudgingly.

"You're going to make me blush," he bantered.

She rolled her eyes. "I healed as much as I can tonight. How do you feel?"

"Better than before. Your medical prowess is commendable."

She could feel her cheeks heat up unwillingly. "Well, for the risk you're facing coming to me, it ought to be."

"Are you still so concerned about Kakashi?"

"As much as you try to act like he's a mere nuisance, it's kind of hard not to be. He's at least absent for the moment though."

"What a relief that is." She could hear the teasing in his tone again. His complete nonchalance toward Kakashi as an adversary was baffling to her.

"You're way too casual about him. Do you really think you'd escape unscathed if he were to find you here?" She admonished.

"You're speaking as if I want him to. I'm taking precautions Sakura, as I told you. I'm not interested in getting in a confrontation with him."

"Alright, because I'm telling you right now; I won't be able to protect you. Kakashi might have… feelings for me, but those only go so far." She wanted to stress the precariousness of what they were doing to him. He didn't seem to take it seriously enough.

"As you've said yourself, I'm not your average shinobi. Should it come down to that, I will defend myself as necessary. But let's hope we can avoid that altogether, hm?"

"You really think you're on par with him should it come to that?" She didn't mean to be so skeptical, but she knew how powerful Kakashi was. Not to mention Itachi's health in general right now.

"Yes. No need to worry so much over me," he smirked. He resembled Sasuke so much aesthetically yet was still so different. Sasuke would never be so…. she was searching for the right word for it. She didn't think he was actually flirting with her. He didn't look at her the way men did if they were attracted to her. But he was certainly… playful in the way he spoke to her. It wasn't something she could have ever accused Sasuke of being. Itachi seemed confident in his own power but wasn't interested in testing himself against other shinobi if he could help it. Alike in appearance, but distinct personalities.

"I'm not, I'm just warning you."

"Of course."

She sighed before reluctantly offering him some tea before he left.

"Tea?" He looked at her in surprise.

Why was he acting like that? It was just tea. "I'm making some for myself anyway, so it's only right to extend the offer."

He looked at her in fascination. She couldn't tell what the small smile on his face meant.

"If you don't want it, you can just say that," she said testily.

"No, no. I'd love some tea." He laughed after he said it though, which didn't do anything to appease her. She flipped him off before making her way over to the kitchen to boil water. When she turned back around to him, he still had that same odd look on his face. She slammed a teacup in front of him in her irritation and his lips quirked in amusement.

"Are you like this with Kakashi as well?"

"I'm not certain what you're getting at? If you're asking if I simply roll over for him, the answer is no. I'm sure you can guess it's not something that pleases him."

He was silent for a moment before replying, "oh, I'm not so sure about that."


Inhale, exhale. She started jogging in the morning two years ago. She didn't need the exercise of course. She trained enough already, but it was therapeutic for her. The increased norepinephrine normally did wonders for releasing the tension wound in her body. As she ran the next mile she reflected on the last few days. Slowly, but surely, she was making progress on Itachi. She healed about 40% of the damage to his lungs, regenerating many of the small blood vessels that were mutilated. Still, it didn't sit well with her how counterproductive this all was. It was only to buy him time to accomplish whatever goal he had that required him to be in better health. She knew what she had signed up for, and she was still bothered she couldn't do more. She wouldn't call them friends exactly, but there was an understanding of some kind between them. His presence the last couple of days wasn't unpleasant. He was… alright to be around. He definitely said things to get reactions out of her, for whatever twisted reason, but he was also pleasant to talk to. He would ask questions about what she was doing, and it would turn into far more in-depth conversations. He even asked her about what type of books she liked, and had surprisingly enough, read some of them as well. He was intelligent, probably just as intelligent as Kakashi, but far less intimidating. She could see herself being friends with him if the circumstances were different. Unfortunately, they weren't.

She felt the elevated pumping of her heart in her chest, the perspiration building on the back of her neck. She wasn't as calm as she normally would be through a run, but still, she felt a bit better…until she saw him. The precious tranquility she managed to achieve evaporated in that instance. He wasn't supposed to be back until tomorrow. She used to get so frustrated with his tardiness. Now, more than ever, she wished for that annoying trait back.

"Yo!"

She doubted he was going to go away. She slowed her pace to a walk as she got closer to him. Her stomach did a little flip at how happy he appeared. Was he that excited to see her?

"You're back early."

"I am capable of that, you know."

He was about to kiss her, she could tell. It had her blurting out an excuse. "I need to go home. I haven't eaten breakfast yet."

"I'll walk you back then." She almost relented, hoping that would be enough for him at the moment. She humored herself with a mental image of shutting the door in his face as she waved goodbye. When she looked up at his crinkled eye, she realized something – Itachi's scent. She wasn't sure if it would be gone from her apartment so early in the morning. She couldn't take the chance with Kakashi's nose. But how could she backtrack without him thinking something was amiss?

"Oh shit, I just realized I never went food shopping. I guess I'll have to go somewhere to eat after all." She took a deep breath before adding, "I'm sure you're going to insist on coming along."

She was acting as if she was resigning herself to his presence. She hoped the angle was subtle enough. Kakashi was incredibly observant, especially when it came to her.

"You make it seem as if I'm holding a Chidori to your head." He took her hand in his, interlacing their fingers. 'You may as well be,' she thought, but said nothing. She got him to leave with her, without an issue. She'd take it.

"I missed you," he said after a few minutes of walking silently. She chanced a glance at him, before quickly looking away. What did he expect her to say to that? She felt his thumb run along the back of her hand. It felt nice, comforting even. Hadn't Ino said things would be easier for her if she admitted she wanted him, if she wasn't battling with herself? Wrong, she was so wrong. He didn't release her hand until they took a seat at a table for breakfast.

A chipper voice greeted them. Sakura turned in the direction of their server, and she could practically see the lust on her face as she looked at Kakashi. His mask was on, his Sharingan covered, and she was still nearly salivating at the sight of him. It was appalling. He gestured for her to order first, and the waitress turned to her reluctantly, her smile forced.

"Could I have the tamagoyaki and the matcha tea please?"

"And for you, Mr. Hatake?" She simpered. She wasn't surprised she knew who he was. She must think, with Sakura's disheveled appearance from her run, she wasn't competition for him. The woman was very pretty, no doubt about it, but she was a civilian. Even if he wasn't obsessed with her, she could never see him being interested. He'd have to be too mindful of his strength, and he wasn't exactly the gentle type.

"Matcha tea for me as well. Nothing to eat," he responded curtly, not even looking at the woman.

The waitress walked away a bit dejectedly, picking up on his disinterest. She was fortunate to not have it. Being the subject of Kakashi's attention wasn't exactly a net positive.

"We're going on a mission the end of the week." She was hyperaware of his leg pressed against hers under the table.

"We?"

"Yes, we," he confirmed. "We've been hired to protect a merchant's daughter in the Land of Waves. Apparently, there have been two assassination attempts against her in the last month alone. It will likely take us longer than a few days to root out who the culprit behind them is. A perfect opportunity for you to prove yourself to me, hm?"

This mission could take them weeks, depending on the situation. Even if other shinobi were involved, they wouldn't be anyone that would be a threat, given the B-rank status.

"Are Naruto or Sai coming along?" She was hesitant to even ask because he seemed far too pleased.

"Nope, just you and me on this one." She could practically see his smirk through the mask.

"Fantastic."

"I thought so as well."

She shot him a venomous look at his baiting but didn't respond verbally. She did her best to ignore his incessant staring as she ate.

"Do you want anything else baby?" He asked when the waitress came back to check on them.

"No, thanks." She responded automatically, before his endearment finally registered in her head.

"What did you just…?" She couldn't even bring herself to use the word. The waitress stared at her in disbelief.

"I'll take the check for us then." He leaned back in his chair lazily after dismissing her.

"Don't ever call me that again!" She managed to growl after collecting herself.

"Why not? You don't like it?"

"Not from you."

"You're so cruel Sakura." He pretended to pout.

"Yet you're still here."

He put his hand on her knee before she reflexively smacked it off. 'Oh shit, is that going to set him off?' She thought.

"I can't seem to stay away. I just like you too much," he quipped.

She was perplexed by how he was acting. So playful? Almost like how he used to be with her, before well, everything…


Satisfaction seeped into him. She was far more relaxed with him now. He had an epiphany while away from her the last few days. That kiss she initiated... he wanted that again, that semblance of affection from her. He had been effectively weaponizing her desire for him; however, everything else remained unchanged. He realized he would have to modify his approach a bit to get what he truly craved. He needed to go slower. Patience: it was something he would have to demonstrate for her to be his, and she would be, one way or another.

Please review and let me know your thoughts! Kakashi's mind is certainly something isn't it... lol.

This summer has been very busy for me. I just haven't had nearly as much time to write as I normally do, hence the big delay on this chapter. As much as I wish it were the case, writing isn't my job. I write when I'm able to and that's all I can really say. Better late than never though, right?