Hi Readers: I hope that you guys enjoyed the past couple chapters that covered some of the business. But the truth is, I don't know where to take the business meeting when I have something else on my mind right now. And that would be Andy. So, I want to do a chapter on him now that I've brought him up. I hope you understand that there are times where I just need to follow the story where it leads me, rather than have me lead the storyline. And right now, the story is telling me that I need to cover this thing about Andy.
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Chapter Three Hundred and Eighty-Eight
The Goodbye that Never Happened

Three hours later, 1:30 PM – Casey Primary Suite
The original plan was for them to do an entire day of business. To go from morning to night, with them just doing business. But unfortunately, it didn't seem like Matt was able to do that past lunch. When they decided to break for lunch, Matt surprised everybody by telling them that they would not be doing meetings again this afternoon; and that they would instead be working independently and e-mailing each other if they need to talk. And that was just what was going to happen, nobody questioned it; well, except for one person. And that person would be Gabby, as she was currently wondering just why her husband felt like he needed to take a break. However, she could already tell that it was something serious just based on the sight that she was walking into as she walked into their room; as her husband was not looking normal at the moment, he was instead wearing sweats as he sat in bed. Something he rarely does. Well, that is unless they want to take it easy with each other; and not risk them having sex with each other as they relax.

And right now, that most certainly was exactly what Matt wanted; he wanted to relax in bed and take it easy with his wife, rather than have sex with his wife so that he could try and concentrate as much as he can on the business. But that was pretty hard at the moment, due to the fact that he had Darden in his head. All the things that he wished he could say to him, how he still feels bad that he lost his life on the job right in front of him. I mean, he's always felt that way; heaven knows he'll always feel that way, due to the fact that he lost a man on his shift. But what just makes it worse, is the fact that he died right in front of him; and that big fireball still haunts him at times, which is the exact thing he dreams about when he has that PTSD. And how his best friend never got a chance to say goodbye to Heather, or his sons. And that also brought up another part of his PTSD, how he said goodbye to Gabby when he thought he as going to die, which actually was starting to make him wonder. Was it really only due to the fight that they had.

Was that the only reason that he told her goodbye in the middle of the fire? Or was there more to it? Was there something to it related to Darden, and how he never got a chance to say goodbye to Heather? And now that he's thought about it, he can't stop thinking about it; and he can't explain why that's the case. Still, he's going to have to find a way to explain it; due to the fact that Gabby is going to want some answers as to why they just cut their day of business short. Why they decided to leave their meetings. In fact, at first she was going to be mad as she thought that he was starting to back out of the business; a business that she was really interested in. But now, she's starting to see that this has nothing to do with that at all; rather, this was related to something her husband has in his mind at the moment…she could just tell that was the case based on the way that he was barely concentrating at the moment. Both on his own iPad, and on the fact that she just walked into their room so that they can get some time together today.

And that, well it was something that would normally lead to him giving her his full, undivided attention; but it seemed that wasn't the case right now, and she wanted to know why that was the case. So, she decided to swallow the questions that she had regarding the business as they didn't really matter; what did matter, was how her husband was doing if he was having some problems with his mental health. And if that was the case, then they were going to talk right now. "Hey, Matt?" Turning his head, Matt finally realized that his wife was in the room. "Hey, you say something?" And that was when Gabby knew, he had something serious on his mind if he didn't even realize that she was in the room. "You didn't even realize that I was in the room, did you?" Matt sighed, as he hated that was the case. So much so, that he just looked down at what he was doing on his iPad. "Baby, are you okay?" Matt was about to say yes to Gabby, but he knew that wasn't the truth, because he wasn't okay at the moment. He could never be okay, as it's still hard.

And all these years, he's been holding these feelings in; feelings that have been buried in him since Darden died in front of him. "No, I'm not okay." Gabby agreed with her husband as he said that, before walking over to her side of the bed so that she can get in bed with him, which she can due as she's already gotten changed ahead of time. I mean, she did see Matt in his sweats when she came upstairs, which meant something to her; it meant that he wanted to take it easy and relax right now. And he also wanted to talk to her, due to the fact that they had the time to do so now that they've done their work; and especially now that the kids are all taking their naps. "Are the kids okay?" Gabby agreed with Matt, as they were all okay. "Yes, they're fine baby. But how about you do me a favor and set your iPad down? Then, lay down with me so that we can talk. Because right now, you're not okay baby. I can see it in your eyes that you need to talk to me, so I want to be here for you like I always am." Matt agreed with his wife, before setting his iPad down.

After all, that was what he needed to do right now; he needed to disconnect from work for a moment, as he concentrated on his mental health. Something that he can only do if he concentrates on Gabby at the moment, while their children take a nap. Which is when he thought about something, related to the outfit that his wife was wearing, which was his sweats. "By the way, you better still…" Gabby laughed. "Don't worry baby, I'm still wearing the lingerie underneath my clothes. But you need to talk to me if you want to have it." Matt agreed with Gabby as she said that, smiling as she laid down in their bed; after which, he did the same so that he could get comfortable with the woman he loves more than anything in the entire world. The woman he wants to spend the rest of his life loving, as they hold each other close here in their bed, while also raising their four beautiful children together. But right now, they were not his concern. Instead, that was talking to his wife about just what was on his mind right now as it was very important.

So important, that they ended up ending the meeting early; something that he feels he should apologize to his wife for, as she may have wanted to cover some other things. "Sorry if the meeting ended prematurely, and if you wanted to cover other things…" Shaking her head, Gabby proceeded to get close to the man she loves. "Hey, look at me." Matt agreed with Gabby, just looking at her as they both moved towards the centre of the bed, which is where they are going to hold each other close as they talk about this, and whatever they need to talk about. And boy were they always comfortable when they're in the center of their bed, simply due to the fact that it was the place where they can cuddle up to each other. And it was also the place where they can talk very easily, since they are open and honest with each other when they're comfortable. "You comfortable?" Matt agreed with Gabby, as he's always comfortable when he's with her. So much so, that he decided to wrap his arm around his wife to hold her close to him this afternoon.

Meanwhile, Gabby wrapped her arms around his back and slipped her legs in between his, which led to Matt leaning in and kissing the woman he loves more than anything the entire world. "I love you." Gabby agreed with Matt as he told her that, well aware that he loves her; but if he loves her, then he needs to tell her the truth when it comes to what's going on in his mind at the moment. "If you do love me as you tell me you do, then you need to stop hiding how you're feeling and talk to me baby." Matt agreed with his wife as she said that, well aware that was the case, which is why they are up here at the moment, so that he can do just that. "I am hoping to do that up here, right now for you." Gabby agreed with Matt as he told her that, as she would truly appreciate that; if he would talk to her right now and let her know what's going on in his mind since she's worried. "So, what's going on baby?" Matt sighed as Gabby asked him what's on his mind. "I guess, it's just something that I want to talk to you about." Gabby agreed with her husband, smiling.

She then wrapped her arms around his neck as she cuddled up to him, which was her way of telling him that he can talk to her if that's that he needs to do; something that he truly appreciated as he moved his hand to her back and stroked it with his thumb. After which, he leaned in and kissed her softly. "I love you Gabby." Gabby agreed with Matt, well aware that he loves her. "I know you do Matt, because I love you too. And because I love you, it pains me to see you in this position that you find yourself. You seem to be hurting, and I don't like it. So, I want you to talk to me right now baby." Matt agreed with Gabby as she said that, before taking a breath. "I think I've found out the real reason why I said goodbye to you in that fire." Gabby was a bit surprised to hear that. "Baby, I thought that was due to the fact that we were in that fight." Matt agreed with Gabby, as that was still one of the major reasons why he said goodbye to her in the fire; due to the fact that he wanted his last words to her to be ones of love rather than of pure anger.

So, that was still the truth. "Well, that's one of the reasons that I think I did it." Gabby agreed with her husband as he said that, well aware that nothing is black and white when it comes to what Matt does; there are always reasons behind every single action that he does, and there are times where there are a couple. And right now, that's precisely what he's in the midst of telling her: that contrary to what he said originally, there was more to why he decided to say goodbye to her in that fire. "So, what reason do you think you may need to add to that list?" Matt sighed as he looked at Gabby, while also stroking his thumb. "I guess, it was related to Andy." Gabby just looked at Matt as he said that, well aware that he thinks of him a lot at times. "Did you just think of him baby?" Matt agreed with Gabby, as he did just think of his best friend. "Yeah, I just thought of Andy." Matt sighed, as he looked down. "And I also thought about how he died, and all the things that were left unsaid between him and Heather.": Gabby just looked at Matt as he said that.

She then realized that there really is more to this, and that he needs to hold her right now. "How about you sit up with a pillow behind you? Then I can lay down in your arms, as I cuddle up to you here in our bed. I think that's something that you need me to do right now." Matt agreed with Gabby, as he felt the same way. He felt like he needed to hold her in his arms, as they cuddled up to each other here in bed. That way, they could both just relax as they held each other in bed. "I like that idea." Gabby agreed with Matt, smiling as she watched him move away from her so that he can get all comfortable. But just that did that involve? Well, it involved him letting her go, rolling over onto his back and then moving away from her; after which, he grabbed his pillows and proceeded to set them up so that they were things that he can lean back against. But this time around her was going to grab some more pillows that he can use, which would be Gabby's. I mean, she's not using them when she's cuddling up to him; so, he might as well use them instead.

"Here, pass me your pillows."

Gabby was confused as she heard her husband say that, unsure as to just why he wanted to have her pillows. "Why do you need my pillows when you have your own pillows?" Matt snickered. "You don't use them when we cuddle up to each other in bed, so somebody might as well use them. And they can make me much more comfortable as I lean back against them." Thinking about it, Gabby smiled as that was the truth. Another thing that's the truth? Well, that would be the fact that she just fell in love with her husband all over again. After all, it's the simple things that make her fall in love with his man. The simple, easy things that make her want to help him battle these things that are currently troubling him. And that's exactly what she's going to do, now that they're alone and cuddling up to each other in bed; even better, she was currently laying down in his arms as she cuddled up to him as he wants her to. "Is this what you want?" Wrapping his arm around Gabby, Matt smirked as this most certainly is exactly what he wants.

He wants to hold his wife close to him in bed, as they cuddle up to each other and talk. And talk they will, just as soon as they tug the covers up on top of the both of each other and get some topics out of the way; more specifically, topics like whether or not their parents are okay with watching the kids as they sit up here. "Are our parents okay with us being up here for the moment?" Turning her head, Gabby agreed with Matt as they were; because she told him that he had PTSD. "I told them that you were dealing with some PTSD." And that was the truth (in a way), he was dealing with PTSD related to both Andy's deal; as well as when he said goodbye to Gabby, when he thought that he was going to die in that fire. Something that he wonders all these years later, whether Gabby's still mad at him about.

"Just curious, are you still mad at me for saying goodbye to you at the warehouse fire?"

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"Are you still mad at me for saying goodbye to you at the warehouse fire?"

Now that was a question that Gabby really had to think about, especially with all the new information that she's received over the past year and a half. Between things that she and Matt spoke about during their road trip, to the conversations they had while living in Hawaii; and now, there's conversations related to Andy…Gabby has a lot more information with regards to the reasons behind Matt saying goodbye to her the way he did. I mean, this is a gamechanger when it comes to how she feels about what he did, simply due to the fact that it makes a lot of things clear; about some of the things that were going through his mind at the time. More specifically, how he (a) didn't want to have his last words to her be those of hate, as they were in a fight prior to the fire; and (b) how he didn't want to die without saying goodbye to his wife, which is something that his best friend had to do. And that weighed on her, as she also knew that was part of her husband's PTSD, which also makes sense how all of this ties into him having a bit of PTSD right now.

It brings back a lot of memories, and it brings back a lot of hard times that he has to think about when he's working. But right now, he wasn't working (for now); but instead, he was holding her close in bed as they spoke to each other about the question at hand. Whether she was still mad at him for saying goodbye to her at the warehouse fire. And the truth was, she wasn't.

She wasn't mad at him anymore, as she understands why he did it. Why he decided that he needed to say goodbye to her, when they were in that fight; and she understood even more, now that he gave her some more information about the reasons why he did it. About how he didn't want her to have to go on with life (had he died) without him having told her goodbye, and that he loves her one last time. And that was why she could no longer be mad at her husband for what he did, when she now knows…as much as it hurts to admit it…he did the right thing when he said goodbye to her. Add in the fact that it's part of her husband's PTSD, and she just doesn't feel that it's fair to Matt that she's still mad at him; not when he must deal with the regrets that play back in his head, each and every time that he has PTSD about that time in their lives. The times where he hates himself for stuff he did, when he thought it was the right thing at the time. Add in all of those reasons, Gabby could say with confidence that she was no longer mad with her husband.

"No, I'm not mad at you about it anymore."

Smiling as he turned his head to look down at Gabby, Matt couldn't help but feel happy over the fact that she wasn't mad at him anymore with regards to the fact that he said goodbye to her during that fire. "Thanks baby." Gabby agreed with Matt as he said that, smiling as she turned her head and kiss him once more. After which, she decided to sit up and grab the blouse that she was still wearing (she just changed her pants). Moving to take it off, Gabby smirked due to the fact that she wants something. She wants her husband…and another baby. Yes, she just said that. "I want you, and to go for another baby." Matt was surprised as he heard Gabby say that. "I thought we already agreed we were done?" Gabby sighed, as she didn't know what she wanted to do anymore. "I don't know anymore." Matt agreed with Gabby as she said that. "Gabby, can I ask you something?" Gabby nodded. "What is it babe?" Matt sighed. "Do you ever with we went slower, and never had twins and just single babies at times?" Gabby bit her lip, as she did.

She did think about it sometimes…what their life would be like if they just had single babies.